Let's kick this into gear, DLG. I was browsing through the old site's recommendations when I came across this...thing. See for yourself!

The summary seems okay, I mean, a Slytherin Harry could still marry Ginny, but then I read the story itself and wanted to vomit. I mean, he's not sweet-talking his beloved. He's raping his mother! What kind of sick bastard gets off to this?

 

You Go Girl! And let us not forget these abominations:

All of them are by this Shezza88 girl, could anyone be this misguided? The author should get her act together already.

Clearly Harry should renounce that wicked Fallen Angel temptress, the Carpenter slut who's always throwing herself at him, and all those terrible dark influences in his life. He needs Ginny more than ever in this story, even though they've only spoken to each other like three times in this entire series, you could definite feel the chemistry and unrequited desires between them throughout Harry's vicious, biting, and mocking remarks. Why should Harry care about a Fallen Angel who only raised him since he was seven when true love is sight?

Harry/Ginny was clearly meant to be, together they would crush Voldemort with their wonderful powers of love. Who needs God when they've got each other? Harry just needs to kill his daughter and the biggest obstacle between his and Ginny's destiny is gone. Besides, they can make better looking freckled babies with each other!!11!!11ONE! *Squeals*

Let's go flame that Shezza88 girl until she sees the truth!

Oh, and what's this Dresden Files thing anyway? Well, whatever it is it can't possibly even come close to the epic romantic masterpieces that were Half-Blood Prince, the Deathly Hallows epilogue, and Twilight.

I apologize if this post was not up to Dark Lady Ginny standards, but the lack of Harry/Ginny smilies seriously hampered my efforts at encouraging a Gin-tasic (TM) atmosphere.

 

4. Snape Song by Atten Daith
Just came to me in the car one day.
Harry Potter - Fiction Rated: T - English - Parody/General - Chapters: 1 - Words: 405 - Reviews: 0 - Updated: 4-1-09 - Published: 4-1-09 - Complete

Nothing whatsoever to do with Ginny. This should be drenched with fuel and lit alight with the Dark Lady Ginny members chanting anti-Snape war songs.

 

I tried reading stuff from Shezza. Isn't she have an account here? Her stuff is terrible, how come we haven't banned her yet?

Also, I know we're only supposed to post bad fics but I'm in such a bad mood I thought I'd post something good.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4848916/1/Revenge_and_Nightmares

X O X O X

 

You think Shezza is bad?, then you haven't read some guy named Nonjon.
That guy and his story "A Black Comedy" are total bullshit, I mean why is Harry fucking any girl he wants when Ginny is right there?

It's an outrage!

They are soulmates, they clearly belong together. Ginny even became a ghost to be with him and he still rejects her, it was obvious that their soulbond and their love was powerful enough to create a new body for Ginny. She even knows the most powerfull shield there is(and for the ignorants out there it is the Love Shield, incantation: "Love Shield"), the only reason it didn't work at the battle was because harry wasn't there in order for their magical cores to unite by holding hands and saying the incantation together.

So all in all that story is total bullshit and should be in the Recycle Bin.

Ginny/Harry is the way to go.

 

Bravo, Oz. It appears that some of us haven't lost what precious sanity we had left.

 

This thread as well as the "worst summaries" thread made me think of this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pvZiYgNMjM

Absolutely hilarious.

 

Yeah, it's been a month since this thread was started (back on April Fool's, in case anyone has a WTF? moment reading a few of the first posts), but here's one that I can't resist linking here. If you've ingested some poison or other and don't have any syrup of ipecac handy, simply take a moment to read this anal seepage and you'll be puking before you know it.

I honestly love you By La Princesa
Category: Post-OotP
Characters:Harry/Ginny
Genres: Fluff
Warnings: None
Rating: PG
Reviews: 9
Summary: Harry realizes his feelings for Ginny through a song.
Hitcount: Story Total: 984

Yes, those are tears on your cheeks after reading that. I might have to place this in "For Review"...

 

You sure don't fit here don macas. You stupid shit.

 

I hope this was sarcasm. If not, I call Troll.

 

aaltwal, methinks you need your sarcasm detector examined...

 

This is supposed to be a Star Wars/Harry Potter crossover, with a Harry/female!Revan (Raven) pairing.

Okay... With you so far, I suppose.

Then it falls apart. Totally. This writer cannot possibly have English as their first (or second, or third) language. The number of errors is astounding. If you can read (not skim, but read) through the entire first chapter without getting a headache, you are clearly Superman.

Either that, or you're as dim as the majority of the reviewers.

The 'You're great, please update' zombies who reviewed this... thing, gave mind-blowingly thorough critiques such as "Just a few spelling mistakes." and "...there was at least one mistake...", though more often than not what they said was more along the lines of one reviewer's "Do keep up the awesome work and update soon please!"

Then there is a review from Captain Shoulah, whose reviews have been quoted here before (for A Very Alternate Yule Ball, but that thread no longer exists), that says:

LOL, ouch. Emphasis mine. At least he wished him luck, he'll need it.

The other reviewers are clearly on some kind of controlled substance or they are brain dead, if those were the only errors they spotted.

I have bad news for Captain Shoulah, unless the author includes hetero sex scenes in this fic, I doubt the FFN staff will see fit to uphold their own policies and remove it.

 

Unknown Friendship turns into Love » by Angel Xavier reviews Harry reflects on the end of the war and finds love with a friend that no one knew he had, not even his best friends. HPDG pairing. Summary sucks but hopefully you like the story.Rated: K - English - Romance/General - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,308 - Reviews: 48 - Updated: 5-12-09 - Published: 1-4-09 - Harry P. & Daphne G.

What made this stand out to me is that the author took the main characters for a story I'm working on (Harry, Daphne, Andromeda) and wrote an incredibly shitty story.

Typos are numerous. Characterization is a myth. The only plot that I can divine so far is that Harry and Daphne were dating in secret and 'lo! the Weasley's + Hermione are unhappy. Did I mention so far that characterization blew in this story? I don't think I'll read to see how the author explains Harry dating Ginny when he may or may not have been involved with Daphne.

Thank you Angel Xavier for writing a shitty story.

 

/pat Kensington

I hate that. I get a bunny, then backtrack the sites to make sure I didn't pick up some mental traffic and see if there's anything existing on that route, then WHAM with the badfic that leaves a bad taste in your mouth.

Suddenly you realize the bunny now has a broken neck. Oh well.

 

one shots by harryxbella reviews one shotsComplete - Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - General/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 180 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 3-29-09 - Harry P.

The author delivered this amazing one-shot, complete with 180(!) words and a total of at least sixteen different errors. harryxbella is also the author of the incredibly short story, The Bond (which you can find in the previous thread), with a whopping word-count of 68 words! /sarcasm

Not only is the title and the summary wrong (being in plural when it's clearly singular), the actual few written lines are littered with errors. The summary doesn't even describe what the one-shot is about... -_-