1. Hey Guest,

    Are you handy with Photoshop? Do you feel the DLP Anakin logo is tired and old? Do you want to win a special as of yet undetermined prize? Join the DLP Banner Photoshop Competition! Fame, fortune, and the respect of your peers await those that enter. Sadness, despair, and a deep self-loathing await those that do not.

    Enter the competition.
    Dismiss Notice

Complete Harry Johnson and the Headmaster's Socks by Doghead Thirteen - M

Discussion in 'Humor' started by bornagainpenguin, Apr 12, 2007.

  1. bornagainpenguin

    bornagainpenguin DLP Archivist

    Oct 27, 2005
    Title: Harry Johnson and the Headmaster's Socks
    Author: Doghead Thirteen
    Rating: M
    Genre: Action/Adventure/Sci-Fi
    DLP Category: Humor/Parody or The Alternate's
    Pairing: Harry/Hermione
    Chapters: 23
    Words: 157,825
    Updated: August 17, 2007
    Published: February 16, 2007
    Status: Complete

    Summary: Started off as 'What if Hogwarts was a college' and diverged. Set in the same universe as the Biker Half rewrite. Features liberal quantities of crossover and new characters. Beware, contains superhuman crazy Harry.
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3397550/1/


    Where do I start? Basically if you followed Ranma ½ at any point in the past on the RAAC you've probably already heard of Doghead Thirteen and his series 'Biker One Half' which put the Ranma ½ series into a blender, add werewolves and Scottish bikers (for no apparent reason) and put the whole thing on purree. If you haven't and are a Ranma ½ fan I highly recommend you give it a shot. It's a sick story that'll have you rolling at its unintentional gaffes and on the edge of your seat wanting to know what he'll pull next....

    Now imagine him giving that same treatment to the Harry Potter series...

    Now Add back Ranma ½...

    Then stir in the X-men, Warhammer, Sailor Moon, and Ah My Goddess...

    Now sprinkle some Star Wars, Transformers and a bit of :hbp
    involving a universe that allows for megacrossovers and an ongoing war between bad and worse ...opps wait, not THAT half baked plot...

    Are you beginning to get a feel for the insanity yet? But wait there's more, if you start reading now, we can add in a HEUG disclaimer that takes up half the fic on the first chapter, (more of a prologue than anything else...)

    LOL...I've only read the first chapter and I'm raring for more because this guy is so sick he always manages to make whatever series he tackles seem new for awhile, so I'm eager to get back to it--I just had to tell you about it first!



    Title: Harry Johnson and the Lunatic Scientist
    Chapters: 12
    Words: 111,177
    Updated: August 3, 2009
    Published: September 5, 2007
    Status: Complete
    Summary: Fits between Headmaster's Socks and Deathtrap Girl. It's summer 1997, Harry's got a job to do, the Blink Dog is in for a Hell of a ride, and Hermione's about to get a look at what life as an interstellar mercenary is really all about...
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3769195/1/Harry-Johnson-and-the-Lunatic-Scientist

    Title: Harry Johnson and the Deathtrap Girl
    Chapters: 10
    Words: 82,497
    Updated: October 14, 2011
    Published: July 5, 2009
    Status: Abandoned
    Summary: Sequel to Headmaster's Socks. As Harry and Hermione enter the next stage of the relationship, it's time for them to enter their second term at the Collegium. But there's something rotten in the bowels of Hogwarts, and Ginny Weasely is in big trouble...
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5192964/1/Harry-Johnson-and-the-Deathtrap-Girl

    Checked by Minion, February 9, 2013
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 9, 2013
  2. The Silent Knight

    The Silent Knight Seventh Year

    Jun 8, 2006
    My God, this guy is out of his mind. I love it. It's great. Completely mad. I wish I was a mad, hippie, stoner biker.
  3. Manatheron

    Manatheron Headmaster

    Dec 12, 2006
    This must be one of those stories you have to 'just get', cause I don't.

  4. Wasteland

    Wasteland Second Year

    Jul 31, 2006
    I'm so with that. For the people that get this, it might be a good story. For me, a person that just doesn't get it, it still wasn't bad. I just probably missed half the main points of the story thats all. 2.5/5
    Last edited: Apr 13, 2007
  5. EsperJones

    EsperJones Order Member

    Mar 3, 2006
    Seattle, WA
    I have just found this story now, and it's actually an interesting crack-fic. The author doesn't give a damn about reviews, and just writes for fun. It shows.

    The negatives: Abused Harry. Friends with Hermione and (Sort of) Ron. What-the-fuck crossovers. Sith Harry. Super harry. HP universe fucked up beyond recognition. Lots of technobabble. Lots of OCs.
    The positives: What-the-fuck crossovers. Psychotically insane Harry. He kills people. Dursley abuse makes sense. Complete. Good Grammar/Spelling. Original plot.

    It's worth a read if you have nothing else to read.

    And using Lavender as a sex-toy I haven't really seen before.
  6. [KS18]Raziel44

    [KS18]Raziel44 Card Captored and buttsecksed

    Nov 3, 2007
    i umm don't get the story... but lavender as a sex toy is cool hahaha
  7. The Fine Balance

    The Fine Balance Headmaster

    Jun 8, 2006
    I have no idea wth this is all about, but this really doesn't belong in the Trash Bin.

  8. DarthBill

    DarthBill Dark Lord

    Mar 31, 2006
    I agree. I've never read half the stories that is crossed over with this, but it's fun.

    I don't actually think that there is anything not crossed with this. If I don't see something mentioned, I still assume that it is in there and just doesn't get any air time.

  9. Richard

    Richard Supreme Mugwump

    Jul 5, 2006
    It's very well written for so many crossovers. It's very humorous. I liked it. 4/5 for me.

    Edit: I felt like editing this. I'm around chapter 10 at the moment. I really like the story, despite it being with so many crossovers. And the chapters are pretty long, and very well written. I haven't noticed any spelling mistakes either. Of course, it also has apostrophe's up the wazoo, more than you can count. In any case, I change my rating from a 4 to a 4.7. It has long chapters (which I really like stories having). Good find, definitely should be in the library, in my honest opinion, although other people are going to think differently.
    Last edited: Nov 3, 2007
  10. chelanxar

    chelanxar Squib

    Mar 21, 2007
    hillarious! 6/5
  11. HSRTG

    HSRTG First Year

    Sep 30, 2007
    Southwest U.S.
    If you can roll with the insanity, then this fic is good. Otherwise, it's not good. What I like is that the guy is plainly writing for fun, and doesn't let simple things like "continuity" or "reader reviews" get in the way of whatever he wants to do.

    4/5 for me, but most people would probably give it 2/5.
  12. Pyromaniac

    Pyromaniac Third Year

    Jul 7, 2008
    Washington State/California
    In all honesty, I am now addicted. It's hilarious and well written, the author cracks me up, and I like how Harry is NOT the most powerful being in the universe--its a welcome change.

  13. Erisah

    Erisah First Year

    Mar 28, 2008
    Sydney, Australia
    I recently discovered Doghead's stuff, and I have to say, the levels of enjoyment I get out of it are ridiculous. It's a badass Super!Independent!Sociopathic!Gun-wielding!Assassin!Sith!manwhore!Harry... who is by no means the most powerful being in his universe, and in fact spends about half of his time trying to fix epic fuck-ups that other people have perpetuated and paid him to fix... this is not a Harry who does a lot out of the goodness of his twisted heart, and goddamn if he doesn't work. Add to this that I don't think I've read a better executed crossover universe, and I have to give this a solid 5/5.
  14. Immie

    Immie First Year

    Aug 31, 2008
    Wow. I never thought I'd see a fanfic that had both HP and Artemis Fowl. This is better than crack
  15. slasheh

    slasheh Seventh Year

    Nov 9, 2006
    okay, i honestly missed this stuff even if i read something by Doghead Thirteen a while ago.
    Now i can understand why some people say this is shit, but honestly if you enjoy the way he writes parody (and that is strictly a matter of taste) you'll get at least an evening full of laughs out of this.

    If you don't enjoy over the top parodies then stay far away because this will have you foaming at the mouth :p
  16. Psychotic Cat

    Psychotic Cat Unspeakable

    Jan 3, 2009
    I can see how it would be popular, it follows the wildly popular method of loading the protagonist with endless things the author sees as "awesome" and then having them "pwn" any characters the author dislikes (who will of couse be quite out of character in order to make "bashing" them easier).

    Sadly, as I did not find myself imagining myself as Harry the story did not have me squeling about how awesome I am and how much I "pwn" everyone, it was simply a pain to read, especially the technobabble, honostly that stuff was just horrible.

    I'm happy for anyone who 'gets' this as it seems they have great fun, but I sadly just can't see it.
  17. Argentum

    Argentum First Year

    Jun 22, 2008
    It took me several google searches and some hard thinking; (I've just got back from an aftrer ball party) But I finally 'got' enough of it to laugh myself silly over.
    Excellent grammar, spelling and a good sense of showmanship, I felt it read like he was performing it as a monologue which is unique as far as I am aware.
    For what I understood - 5/5
  18. Iztiak

    Iztiak Heir

    Dec 4, 2006
    Just how many crossovers are in this thing?? o_O
  19. slasheh

    slasheh Seventh Year

    Nov 9, 2006
    too many unless you are a true geek.
    One good thing is that he "tries" to explain the crossovers to some extent in the conversations, but even i (who has been addicted to sci-fi for nearly 20 years now) don't understand every reference, some of them are simply too obscure for the normal person.

    As i said, you either take those things in stride, or you might as well not read it.
  20. XxEnvyxX

    XxEnvyxX Groundskeeper

    Apr 30, 2008
    Germany, Munich
    I think its brilliant, I spend more time choking on my water while trying to drink and to read at the same time than ever before...
    Well, the only story that tops this one in hilarious insanity and fun is 'Make A Wish', but that is pretty damn near impossible to beat.
    I give it a 4.9