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WIP Shinobi: Team 7 by Gallyrat - T - Naruto

Discussion in 'Naruto' started by Banta, Feb 5, 2015.

  1. ahiorth

    ahiorth Squib

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2015
    Messages:
    10
    High Score:
    0
    There was just to much Sakura for me to like this story.
     
  2. Nemrut

    Nemrut The Black Mage Prestige

    Joined:
    Aug 9, 2009
    Messages:
    1,237
    Location:
    Department of Post-Mortem Communications
    High Score:
    2,101
    I actually quite liked the story. For one, I don't find it sinful that Sakura was not executed in chapter one and was instead given a character arc of growth that plays into her strengths, which will keep her from becoming irrelevant once Sasuke and Naruto bullshit their way into godlike powers.

    On the other, after ten years of Naruto fanfiction, novelty is the most precious commodity that I'm looking for in Naruto fanfics, and I quite like this refreshing take on the Hidden Villages and its history, what with having 8 Kage through their time instead of 4.

    The takes on the characters is pretty solid, sure they feel off, at times, like Kakashi but it still works within this story and the humour worked for me for the most part. Got a few laughs.

    Danzo's role is interesting, and I like everyone in Team 7.

    That said, it has its flaws, like the whole Naruto meets Asuma and Kurenai arc was just bizarre in how that worked, they meet once out of coincidence and suddenly, for absolutely no reason, they are this close?

    The world-building is a bit awkward at times and Team 7 does run a bit too smoothly, but yeah, more goods than bads for me.

    So, yeah, writing is solid, like the characters so far, who, while not excellent, still work and there is a lot of fresh ideas and plot threads that I am interested in.

    4/5
     
    Last edited: Nov 29, 2015
  3. Hw597

    Hw597 Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Jun 13, 2008
    Messages:
    272
    Location:
    London
    Definitely deserves a spot in the library imo. Its an ambitious overhall of nearly every aspect of the Naruto world. At some points I think the delivery is a little clumsy but overall it works.

    The story would have a bit more popuarity if Naruto was a bit more "awesome" but I am confident that will come in time.

    4/5- And refreshingly different than the same rehashes we endlessly see in the Naruto fics
     
  4. Kravot

    Kravot Third Year

    Joined:
    Nov 11, 2009
    Messages:
    107
    Gallyrat just started a quest based on this fic. While I'm glad to see a quest based on his awesome world building, I'm kinda bummed that he apparently abandoned the original fic. By his words in the quest thread he found the story getting too messy.

    Link
     
  5. fire

    fire High Inquisitor

    Joined:
    Dec 25, 2011
    Messages:
    589
    Fuck i hope not
     
  6. VanRopen

    VanRopen Unspeakable

    Joined:
    Apr 22, 2011
    Messages:
    746
    Location:
    Los Angeles
    "You caught me. I really liked the world I had created but found the story getting messy and so decided to give it some new life over here."


    F U C K


    I will of course be following, but goddammit.
     
  7. cooladoola

    cooladoola Second Year

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2017
    Messages:
    63
    High Score:
    0
    Rather drab and uninspiring two first chapters. Also, if it's too Sakura-centric, and Sasuke is being shafted (as some of the comments suggest), then I might as well just avoid it. So far, 1.5/5 or 2/5.
     
  8. Verse of Darkness

    Verse of Darkness Denarii Host

    Joined:
    May 29, 2006
    Messages:
    628
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