1. DLP Flash Christmas Competition + Writing Marathon 2024!

    Competition topic: Magical New Year!

    Marathon goal? Crank out words!

    Check the marathon thread or competition thread for details.

    Dismiss Notice

  2. Hi there, Guest

    Only registered users can really experience what DLP has to offer. Many forums are only accessible if you have an account. Why don't you register?
    Dismiss Notice
  3. Introducing for your Perusing Pleasure

    New Thread Thursday
    +
    Shit Post Sunday

    READ ME
    Dismiss Notice
DLP Story Competition Guest User Registration Nag SPS + NTT

Oneshot Sorting 101 by Kevin3

Discussion in 'Trash Bin' started by Harry_J_Potter, May 2, 2015.

1.2083333730698/5, 24 votes
  1. Harry_J_Potter

    Harry_J_Potter Second Year

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2013
    Messages:
    73
    May 2, 2015 #1
    Title: Sorting 101
    Author: Kevin3
    Rating: K
    Genre: Humor/Parody
    Status: Oneshot
    Library Category: Humor
    Pairings: None
    Summary: Parody - Harry returns to Hogwarts for a 5th year, but runs into a disgruntled Hogwarts employee... of the most unlike type.
    Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/1253310/1/Sorting-101

    Quick oneshot that was amusing. 4.5/5 from me
     
    Last edited by a moderator: May 2, 2015
  2. Newcomb

    Newcomb Minister of Magic

    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2013
    Messages:
    1,246
    Location:
    The Evergreen State
    May 2, 2015 #2
    It's only 500 words, so at least it doesn't take a long time to figure out that it's terrible.

    1/5

    Syllables don't line up for this to actually work with a melody and beat. Also it's not funny.

    Kinda reminded me of A Mary Sue Alphabet but substituting old-hat (hah!) canon bashing for wit.
     
  3. Download

    Download Auror ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2014
    Messages:
    640
    Location:
    Adelaide, Australia
    High Score:
    1918
    May 2, 2015 #3
    Pretty ancient and not very good.

    1/5 from me.
     
  4. Styx0444

    Styx0444 Minister of Magic

    Joined:
    Feb 11, 2010
    Messages:
    1,217
    Location:
    Between here and there.
    May 2, 2015 #4
    That was shit. Utter shit. Even the disclaimer had a typo.

    1/5
     
  5. Hero of Stupidity

    Hero of Stupidity Villain of Sensibility ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 5, 2010
    Messages:
    342
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Hungary
    High Score:
    3,172
    May 2, 2015 #5
    Yeah, to this day the only Hat song I found even remotely funny is when somebody got the hat drunk and he sang Pink Floyd.

    1/5
     
  6. Polycarp

    Polycarp Squib

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2014
    Messages:
    10
    May 2, 2015 #6
    Not much to say here. It was not funny in the slightest and is of little literary value.

    1/5
     
  7. Halt

    Halt 1/3 of the Note Bros. Moderator

    Joined:
    May 27, 2010
    Messages:
    1,938
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Philippines
    May 3, 2015 #7
    Everything to be said has been said. Its rhyming simply doesn't work and reading it was awkward and jarring. Can I give it a 0/5?

    No? Ok, 1/5 then.
     
  8. Thaumologist

    Thaumologist Fifth Year ~ Prestige ~

    Joined:
    Jun 27, 2011
    Messages:
    142
    Location:
    Wrexham, Wales
    High Score:
    2000
    May 3, 2015 #8
    The rhyming isn't as bad as it could be. It's certainly not going to go down in the history books, but it is functional. The scheme is consistent, and I only found one pair that didn't rhyme (lot/thought).

    That said, the word choice is awful. Sentences rhyme mid-sentence, and the line breaks are done so that the rhyming works, rather than at a sensible juncture. The character bashing is also silly, because if the Hat were seeking to piss people off, it could surely come up with insults better than "They were all very stupid".

    It could've been great, you know.

    Unfortunately, it really is terrible. 1/5
     
    Last edited: May 4, 2015
  9. Drunken dark lord

    Drunken dark lord First Year

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2011
    Messages:
    25
    May 4, 2015 #9
    really could have been done better.
    1/5
     
  10. Ched

    Ched Da Trek Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐⭐

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2009
    Messages:
    8,379
    Location:
    The South
    May 4, 2015 #10
    Yeah, not particularly impressed.

    I do agree with the A/N at the end that it is difficult and time-consuming (or would be for me) to come up with a sorting hat song, so... kudos for going to that effort.

    But all I can say here is points for trying.

    Not rating b/c I started skimming not too far into the song and therefore didn't read it properly, and apparently that is the focus of the fic.
     
  11. NuScorpii

    NuScorpii Professor

    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2015
    Messages:
    434
    May 4, 2015 #11
    This is one of those fics where I have absolutely no qualms about giving a 1.

    1/5
     
  12. Johnnyseattle

    Johnnyseattle Chief Warlock DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 25, 2011
    Messages:
    1,538
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Cascadia
    May 4, 2015 #12
    There are times when I think long-time residents of this board make troll accounts to make horrid suggestions. This is one of those times.

    1/5
     
    Photon