i agree. the revised version is smoother, just some light fun.
won't win any awards for the best action or serious plot, but then not everything needs to be serious

 

Wow, and here I thought the days of actually enjoying a H/Hr fic were long passed. Little slow going and not much in the way of action, mostly somewhat clean dirty scenes if they could be called that.

Especially enjoyed the Susan.
Action: 2
Darkness: ~nil~
Romance: 4
Originality: 5
Writing: 4

Overall: 4/5, Rounded up for featuring manipulative dumbledore, and several original facets and terms of mirth and depth.

 

For the most part I enjoyed that, though from an early stage you could tell the ending. Besides that, I say it's enjoyable for the situations Harry finds himself in, especially with Lisa Turpin and Katie's chapter/s.

3.5/5 for the laughs, originality, but easily predictable ending.

 

The second version was actually quite a bit better and more enjoyable to read. Not something serious, but nice all the same.