WIP The Last Lion of House Reyne by joen1801 - HP/ASoIaF - M

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by Blandge, Jul 3, 2017.

  1. Blandge

    Blandge First Year DLP Supporter

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    Title: The Last Lion of House Reyne
    Author: joen1801
    Rating: M
    Genre: Adventure - Harry Potter/A Song of Ice and Fire Crossover
    Words: 143,710
    Status: WIP
    Library Category: The Alternatives
    Pairings: Probably Harry Potter/Ashara Dayne
    Summary: When Tywin Lannister crushed the Reyne-Tarbeck Rebellion everyone in the Kingdoms believed he ended two noble lines. But thanks to one unique infant, one Harrion Reyne called Harry by his parents, some survived.
    FanFiction.Net

    joen1801 is probably better known for his GoT crossover, The Difference One Man Can Make, but I think this fic is much better. This is one of the few solid GoT/ASoIaF crossovers, and I think its popularity suffers from being labeled as ASoIaF as opposed to GoT. It is properly categorized as much of the core characters and events are derived from solely the book canon.

    Reincarnation is extremely common for GoT crossovers, and I'm not generally a fan of it. It makes sense if the author wants Harry to have nobility, but I find that it often leads to an extremely slow, multi-chapter introduction with plenty of bland exposition. Additionally, I was a little wary of James and Lily being inserted in the fic (they share no memories with their HP counterparts), but it's handled well.

    The Difference One Man Can Make is extremely heavy on exposition, so I was surprised to see that the author does a great job of covering the entire introduction and backstory in the first two chapters with short sections of narration mixed in with glimpses of live action and dialogue from James' (Reynard) and Lily's PoV.

    The actual Harry Potter crossover aspect starts slowly with Harrion (don't worry, he's called Harry most of the time) experiencing canon-Harry's life in parallel in his dreams. Because Harry's canon memories age with him, he only learns about magic at the age of 11, and learns about it at the same rate as canon-Harry.

    In recent chapters, Harry has been using his magic more often, and the author is doing a good job of introducing magics from Westeros and Essos. In a recent chapter, the author has revealed the cause of Harry's reincarnation, but I won't go into detail here.

    One possible point of contention about the fic is that it's more or less entirely A Song of Ice and Fire. The Known World is the only world that Harrion has ever known, and though he has canon-Harry's memories, he considers canon-Harry to be his counterpart and not an earlier incarnation of himself. Some readers might not like how few aspects carry over from the HP universe, but it didn't bother me much.

    That said, the author explicitly (though perhaps somewhat inconsistently) describes the effects that canon-Harry's memories have had on Harry's personality, and these effects come out in the similarities between Harrion and canon-Harry.

    Harry/James/Lily's insertion into the GoT universe doesn't come off as terribly contrived, and the backstory is very believable. The plot itself is largely invented by the author, though there are some notable convergences with (ASoIaF) canon events throughout the story.

    The writing itself is good, but not outstanding. Stylistically, the author approaches the ASoIaF style/dialect such that one rarely loses immersion due to modern phrasing, but it's not done as well as A Black Prince by cxjenious.

    I can't really think of many moments that blew me away like I would from a 5/5 fic, but the plot is engaging and satisfying, and most writing aspects of the story are done well. Given the originality of the premise (I'm getting sick of Harry Baratheon/Stark/Targaryen) and the overall solidity of the fic, I'll rate this:

    4/5
     
  2. Donimo

    Donimo Seventh Year

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    Harry's mother in this is named Lily, but are his parents still suppose to be Lily and James from HP? I give this a 3/5. It isn't good, but it doesn't suck too much.
     
  3. Genghiz Khan

    Genghiz Khan Unspeakable

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    I didn't actually mind this too much, but the part where he goes to Valyria put me off of it. It's been a while since I read it, but I remember liking it until
    they journey into Valyria and Harry gets the Deus Ex Machina of moar gold moar books pls
    when I put it down for good. I also thought that the Ashara romance was a bit contrived. 2/5, rounded down.
     
  4. Hawkin

    Hawkin Minister of Magic

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    I've enjoyed The Difference One Man Can Make as a guilty pleasure, and having been following it from the start, I can say that the author has greatly improved since his debut in writing, and it shows in this fic. There is a lot less exposition than there was in his previous work, and dialogues have improved greatly.

    This fic is far from perfect, and one of my gripe is the characterization of Ashara Dayne, and her relationship with Harry which feels forced, and is poorly executed. The grammar and spelling are mostly fine, couple of mistakes here and there, but nothing that detracts too much.

    I'd say this is an average story at best, it does not stand out in originality nor execution.

    3/5
     
  5. Blandge

    Blandge First Year DLP Supporter

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    I actually agree with the general sentiment about Ashara. One of the cooler aspects about GoT/ASoIaF from a fanfiction perspective is that there are so many interesting characters that could be paired with the main character (casually or long term).

    The fact that in this fic Harry already knows who he wants to be with from the very beginning definitely removes a lot of flexibility and intrigue from the romance. She's presented to the reader in the second chapter and from then on the fic feels extremely shippy.
     
  6. dhulli

    dhulli The Reborn

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    Actually quite decent. Makes me sad for what could have been with the Prince Who Was Promised. 5/5
     
  7. Donimo

    Donimo Seventh Year

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    I agree the author has gotten a lot better since The Difference One Man Can Make started. Probably needs good feedback at this point.
     
    Last edited: Jul 4, 2017
  8. syed

    syed Supermod

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    The princess was said to have health issues, which was not helped by her giving the prince two children. I was thinking that as he will likely make Ashara his betrothed, and she is one of the princess lady in waiting. I wonder if he might use his healing water magics to aid her. The only reason dorne backed the mad King was that the princess, her uncle and children were trapped in his hands. Harry could sneak in and get them out.

    I still wonder when Harry might visit the god eye, it could be a great location to learn first man lore. He could get a weirwood sapling for his little town, as well as learn runes. He could augement his own armor with runes according to the Royce set. Since Harrenhal is close to the god eye, it is not difficult to believe he would visit both.
    Now his heritage is revealed, he could revisit the citadel and gain access there of old lore. He might even encounter Marwyn the Mage.
     
  9. Dark Syaoran

    Dark Syaoran Golden Patronus Admin

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    I was reading this when it first started.
    Pretty much this, though it was more when they went to Essos. I was hoping that Ashara would stay in Dorne and that whole arc was pretty boring to me. I'm not sure why but their friendship tends to grate on my nerves more often than not. Does anyone else find her annoying sometimes? But then I can never pinpoint what it is about her that annoys me.

    I much rather the limited interactions between Harry and Cersei. You know something is wrong when Cersei is the more attractive option. To be fair, through their few interactions, Harry has had somewhat of a positive impact on her. At least to me, their scenes were always the more interesting in the story.

    A case of a good start but becomes rather lackluster in later chapters. Typically in crossovers, he either just appears or is born a Stark or something. Good to see something different.
     
  10. Donimo

    Donimo Seventh Year

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    Yeah Ashara's characterization is shit. Cersei was very intriguing. I fucking hate the 'warrior-girl' when it doesn't fit. She doesn't have magic or some equalizer, yet because the author thinks she needs to be empowered he does it this way. Basically she'd be better characterized if the author didn't watch anime.
     
  11. Methos

    Methos Seventh Year

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    One can hope she end as most of GRRM characters.
     
  12. HateThisPart

    HateThisPart Squib

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    It's been a while since i read this fic, so I reread the last chapter to refresh on it. I don't understand the dislike toward Ashara's character. I don't think she needs to be a great warrior like Harry or Arthur. She is a strong character who knows Harry well. There relationship seems to be built on trust and respect. I will admit though that Essos arc was a weak way to move Harry up in the world. Nonetheless, this story does a good job exploring a less written about time and location in GoT. The author expands on a lot of less written about characters and they are generally pretty interesting.

    To me, it deserves a strong 4/5.
     
  13. Donimo

    Donimo Seventh Year

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    No she doesn't need to be, but she is, for no reason, and with no logic behind why.
     
  14. Starscion

    Starscion First Year

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    I really think the story had lots of potential, but it was squandered with things like Harry getting a billion power ups in the doom. 3/5 Because it's still entertaining even if it's heavily flawed.
     
  15. The.Snorting.Hat

    The.Snorting.Hat Second Year

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    A pretty good effort. One of the better crossovers of these two universes, since you have to find a way to downgrade wizard powers somehow. Otherwise we get the super!Harry issue and he wipes the floor with everybody and jauntily sits on the Iron throne.

    Pros
    - Pretty good writing and engaging plot
    - Interesting premise
    - Okay characterization
    - No harping on about Starks and glorifying/bashing Targeryns off the bat.

    Cons
    - Despite everything, it looks like we're heading towards a super!Harry anyway. He is being too wise, too strong and too infallible for him to be believable.
    - Some parts are completely unnecessary and even unreasonable, such as Harry suddenly deciding to go off to an adventure in the Doom.
    - we'll have to wait a long time till we get to the character and events we are familiar with.

    In general, I'm curious to see where this fic goes and will probably follow it, but it won't be the best fic ever written any time soon. 3/5
     
  16. Hawkin

    Hawkin Minister of Magic

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    The author has a tendency to empower woman character in his work. Now don't get me wrong, I have nothing against strong female protagonist; I quite enjoyed his rendition of Val in The Difference One Man Can Make. However, in the setting of Game of Throne, a lady the caliber of Ashara should not have been raised gallivanting with with a boy nor with swords. Plus as if that wasn't enough, her personality is never consistent.
     
  17. pbluekan

    pbluekan High Inquisitor DLP Supporter

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    He also compares her eyes to Luna's. Don't know why it stuck with me, but it was kind of at odds with the character Ashara was always supposed to Ben in canon.

    Ashara in this fic is pretty much only there as the generic hot female love interest. Its why her character is so inconsistent. I think the author just doesn't care enough to write her well.
     
  18. Hawkin

    Hawkin Minister of Magic

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    I don't think he doesn't care, I think that without a clear stereotype/model (like he had with Val), he's a bit lost in his characterization.
     
  19. Legend3381

    Legend3381 Seventh Year

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    The story has its flaws but i still think it is one of the better stories in the x-over category. Most stories never make it pass chapter 2. i would like to see a story where harry was not born into a noble family and has to make is way in the world from ground up.
     
  20. Matian

    Matian Seventh Year DLP Supporter

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    Harry being born into house Reyne is certainly interesting, but it's far from enough for this story to reach more than a tentative 3/5.

    Ashara is terribly written and the notion that her father would ever let her go to Essos with Harry is laughably stupid.
     
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