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WIP The White Wolf of Westeros by DrakeCross - M - Witcher/Game of Thrones

Discussion in 'Other Review Board' started by Harry_J_Potter, Oct 6, 2017.

  1. Harry_J_Potter

    Harry_J_Potter First Year

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2013
    Messages:
    48
    Title: The White Wolf of Westeros
    Author: DrakeCross
    Rating: M
    Genre: Adventure/Drama
    Status: WIP (Gets updated every 1-2 weeks)
    Fandom: Witcher/Game of Thrones
    Summary: The Wild Hunt is defeated and Ciri steps beyond to face the source of the White Frost. However something goes wrong and Geralt risks himself as he follows her, ending up in the land of Westeros. Dealing with new intrigue and politics, he will have to decide who he can trust while trying to save his adopted daughter...along with the lives of both worlds!

    Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12545143/1/


    An Intresting fic about political intrigue with Geralt trying navigate through the realm. Just reached 118k words and it's only starting. Alot of competence from the author, only downside is grammatical errors and flow of the story is sometimes stiff.
    Otherwise the fic is amazing, it has everything great intrigue going on and great action scenes.

    Rating 3.8/5 rounds to 4/5, .2 off for rare grammatical errors, 1 off due to few moments of stiffness in storytelling.
     
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2017
  2. Jarizok

    Jarizok Sixth Year

    Joined:
    Sep 22, 2015
    Messages:
    171
    Location:
    Malta
    Uhm, the grammatical errors aren't that rare, sadly. In the first 3 paragraphs alone there's more incorrect sentences than correct ones.

    I'm always in for good GoT fanfics, but I'm not familiar with the Witcher either, so I'm not going to struggle through this in the hope it gets better.
     
  3. Donimo

    Donimo Slug Club Member

    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2015
    Messages:
    194
    This is not well written at all. I didn't get past Geralt meeting Ned, but I could already smell the Stark wank.
     
  4. Xarlor

    Xarlor Squib

    Joined:
    Mar 6, 2014
    Messages:
    18
    What annoyed me the most in the fic was, how heavy Geralt was nerved to fit in at all. All the magic Geralt could use, faded to nothing almost immediately, which could make sense depending from where you let him draw his magic, but seems really strange when you have magic sources around that are strong enough to trigger his amulet and which he can fell. But the point where I stopped reading was the duel with the hound. The hound is a strong well trained human. Geralt is a witcher with at this point at least 100 or more years of combat experience. A witcher is created through alchemical processes, mutagenic compounds, and absurd physical and magical training. This gives them according to the wiki and books:

    Exceptionally increased strength, speed, reflexes, and endurance, far beyond any normal or well-trained human, that allows them to swiftly end fights with minimal effort, and perform physical feats non-witchers couldn't hope to match. A witcher's physical skills alone are sufficient to defeat most monsters single-handedly if combined with extensive training and proper weaponry, whereas regular men could only hope to accomplish this in large groups. Witchers have also been shown to shrug off hits that would normally render normal men unconscious. Additionally, they have been known to survive the strikes of powerful monsters such as giants, or other beings possessing heruculean strength, that would otherwise kill others with a single blow.
    So anything that is not a white walker, dragon or similar should not be a challenge. Especially not a normal human like the hound. No matter how much Geralt is holding back, the hound simply lacks the speed, strength and experience to be able to fight him. And is therefore also a very stupid choice for a rival.

    The plot itself up to that point was really strange and the interactions akward and make nearly no sense in my opinion. The guards that found him demanded of the guy who killed like what 20 to 30 wildlings to disarm. He had to be brought to Ned Stark. Geralt decided to tell Ned Stark much of his life. Ned Stark decided Robert had to know about this guy and wrote him a letter. Geralt decides to train the Stark children. Joffrey decided his hound had to fight him and so on.
    2/5.
     
  5. KGB

    KGB Unspeakable

    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2011
    Messages:
    763
    The biggest problem with it is that it's just a lazy canon rehash. Geralt wants to go beyond the wall but noooohas to go to the capital. Tyrion still gets to say his stupid little line to Jon even if geralt was right there and the conversation was completely different. Bran still falls even if geralt tells him to be more careful with climbing literally before Bran goes to the tower etc.

    I just don't understand why these people bother. If you don't have an actual story to tell and are going to retype canon what's the point?
     
  6. Harry_J_Potter

    Harry_J_Potter First Year

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2013
    Messages:
    48
    I
    Kinda understand the magic nerf, Geralt will be otherwise too OP. As I understand Witchers are humans in peak physical condition, it's the potions that give them an edge in a fight. I mean Bonhart a regular human killed several witchers. Not sure how, but it's no small feat.

    Never watched GOT, so for me everything is new. I read the Witcher books and played the game only. I guess I need to watch GOT to see that this is a rehash
     
  7. TheWiseTomato

    TheWiseTomato Tactical Tomato DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 11, 2009
    Messages:
    2,954
    Location:
    Australia.
    If you're going to nerf a character you need to do it legitimately, not as a result of handwaving. It's like if you were to put Hagrid in Westeros but make his strength equal to that of a normal man for no particular reason.
     
  8. Xarlor

    Xarlor Squib

    Joined:
    Mar 6, 2014
    Messages:
    18
    @Harry_J_Potter
    Witcher are not humans in peak physical condition. They were at the beginning of their training in peak physical condition and were then mutated with alchemy and magic (which kills like half of those that surived the training so far). They are faster, stronger and tougher than humans could ever be, if they surived those mutations (also sterile and a bunch of other results). Geralt especially was so resistent and surived the first mutation so well, that he was further mutated giving him his white hair. As a result Geralt is even stronger and faster than normal witchers. It is explicitly stated, that he is far above, what a normal human could ever achieve in terms of speed strength and reflexes.

    It was nerver confirmed, if Bonhart actually killed three witchers. An if it was it was most likely not in single combat. Witcher die to normal humans normally only in ambushes, bad luck, or to numbers (according to books, games and wiki). Fighting was the only purpose they were created for, to be vastly better at killing than normal humans. The potions further improve their edge over humans, but even without them their mutations, training, and experience (they can live for centuries) make them simply better. And Geralt has been furher mutated than every other witcher.

    To the magic signs nerving, maybe he would have been to strong. But then again dragons exist in asoiaf and Geralt is not much stronger than one dragon. And he could always fall to numbers, ambushes or similar things. So there would always have been threats to him. But what is the point in your crossover, when you have to take nearly everything from your mc away, just so he can fit in your new world and not make an impact?
     
    Last edited: Oct 7, 2017
  9. Cxjenious

    Cxjenious Supreme Mugwump

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2005
    Messages:
    1,742
    Location:
    TN
    When I saw a Witcher/GOT fic recced here I had high hopes. I haven't opened the link yet, but already those hopes have been dashed to bits. I suppose I'll have to write it myself.

    I believe it's three out of ten who survive.
     
    Last edited: Oct 13, 2017 at 5:50 AM