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Vorlon's bitch session

Discussion in 'Hall of Shame' started by Vorlon666, Jan 6, 2006.

  1. Vorlon666

    Vorlon666 Guest

    Hello Fellow Potter Fans

    Well here I was perusing the latest comments when I happened to fall into the award winning links. NOW for the most part, I am fairly tolerant of people either complementing or bashing my story. If it is waranted I'll gladly accept critical comment so that I can better my story. TO THAT EFFECT I have gone and corrected the last six chapters for the incredebly anal retentive english masters out there.

    MY BITCH TODAY had a lot more to do with people saying that I am using old cliche for RON, Hermione and Harry braking up. Well I hate to point out the obvious to the most retarted critics but their is only so many ideas out there that one can use to create an ultimate riff between people. AS FOR THE FUCKING GRAMMAR I would like to say KISS MY FUCKING ASS!

    I don't see my critics pumping out over 25k plus material. To make it worse my critics are actully pumping out less then 10k, garbage riddled with pathetic third year spells and no hope in hell of ever acheiving a decent spell vocabulary. Of course I am referring to Lord Ravenclaw and Lord Sarapeth who seem very intent on cutting my story. Well Gentleman, I have read YOUR material and I must say it's o.k but you sure as hell could use a decent spell creator. Try a Latin to English translator, I'm sure it would allow your story to progress from a two year old perspective to something resembling #12 Grimmauld place
     
  2. Narf

    Narf Administrator Admin DLP Supporter

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    Woah there, guy.

    We might be harsh, but we're honest. We were not, however, insulting you personally. Specifically attacking a mod and admin of this site isn't very smart either. And, Serapheth is the author of Dakaath and The Happy Red Prince, and does crank out big chapters at a good pace, about the same as you. And, he has more than one story, both popular. Another thing, his work isn't riddled with grammar mistakes and poor sentence structure, like yours is, so he spends more time actually paying attention to how he writes. Raven has been busy lately with PatronusCharm, so he hasn't been updating that fast lately. He might also have a life outside fanfiction. A strange thought, I know. And, where the hell did you get second year spells from either of their stories? You're just sprouting off some random ass bullshit right now.

    It doesn't really matter how much you write, if the quality of the story is shoddy.

    Uh...yeah, I really shouldn't be speaking for them though. Oops. I'll go away now. :arrow:
     
  3. ChuckDaTruck

    ChuckDaTruck Overlord

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    Chill, Vorlon. Your story is well liked. Personally, I like theirsmore, but that's a matter of taste. :D :wink:
     
  4. Tobang

    Tobang Fourth Year

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    OUCH!…but I guess I have to say im personally in Vorlon’s corner, I think the story is a great story that tries to avoid the typical cliché’s, though I do have to admit that im slightly worried Vorlon is running out of steam in his story…but besides that the story is definitely on my top 5 list.

    Now that im thinking about it I remember a few spelling/grammar errors (special with pov changes) while reading it but the fact that the story was soooo damn good swept that complaint right from my mind.

    I would definitely recommend finishing it Midknight and srispg, its worth it. And even if parts of it are Cliché its stories like this one that remind you why it’s a cliché in the first place, because when they’re this damn well done its absolutely awesome.
     
  5. Narf

    Narf Administrator Admin DLP Supporter

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    Nah, I can't read it. It goes against everything I hold dear in fanfiction to read a story with that many grammar mistakes. I have heard that it has some good ideas along with the cliches, but I just can't.

    And, I have a problem with the author. He has some real issues with anyone criticizing his work, as seen in his post. They are valid criticisms too.
     
  6. LT2000

    LT2000 Alchemist

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    ROFLMAO...come talk to me about quality when you prove able to turn out a chapter that doesn't look like something left in the hopper by an eleven year old with dyslexia. You've obviously got some maturity and self-esteem issues to deal with, throwing a defensive tantrum like some retarded baby when faced with perfectly valid criticism. If you can't take the heat then just get out of the motherfucking kitchen. Like I said, I wasn't intending to be rude, but since you seem to want to act like some petulant child I'll treat you like one.
     
  7. Narf

    Narf Administrator Admin DLP Supporter

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    And there's your response from Lord Serapheth, Vorlon. I would recommend you take his advice, more specifically, to "get out of the motherfucking kitchen." The kitchen in this place would be fanfiction, just in case you didn't get that. You'll always have critics on your ass, no matter how long or good your story is.
     
  8. Lord Ravenclaw

    Lord Ravenclaw System God Admin

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    Jumping in here to defend myself...your rant has little basis. For one, I've never criticized your story. I've commented that the first chapters have worse grammar than the later ones, but searching through my posts I've never once cut down your story. In fact, I've recommended it to more than one person, advising them to trudge through the first chapters (which are somewhat hard to read) to get to the truly great chapters.

    I enjoy your story, its one of my favorites, but I do not appreciate being incorrectly accused of something. As for my spells, thought is put into them. I use a fucking Latin dictionary and what meager knowledge of Latin syntax and grammar I know in them. If you're talking about Heir of Silvertongue...he didn't exactly have time-dilation device to learn dueling in a single month now did he? Thus why he is training with a dueling master.

    Next time, before YOU cut down someone, get your facts straight. I've never ONCE cut down you or your story. Next time I will not hold back when replying, as I hope it was a simple case of mistaken identity this time.

    I don't pump out huge amount of content, but I also have class, freelance programming, leisure programming (ie, PatronusCharm) and life to deal with. As I'm getting into a nice habit, I've put out 14,000 words of content this week. I hope to put out this much every week or two, but that isn't the point.

    If you're mad because you didn't win the award...well you don't get everything in life. I voted for you. Others voted for you as well. Jeaconis's fic happened to end up on top. Don't worry about it, its a simple award. If you revised the first few chapters, I would bet that you'd see a lot more people actually reading through the story, and would probably win this award come next award time.
     
  9. Dark Syaoran

    Dark Syaoran Persona 4 Admin

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    You people need to chill... seriously.
     
  10. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    Well, Scorpion IS my favourite fic, but I'm with the admins in this one (you won't kick me out now... right? :))).

    As much as I like SS, it 's true that first several chapters have a lot of errors of every kind. It is far from unreadable, as some hinted, but it could use some editing.

    As for Serepath and Raven's story, these are definitely the wrong people to attack. They are both good writers, who never actually flamed you or anything... If you really needed a rant, there were much better targets around.
     
  11. LT2000

    LT2000 Alchemist

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    Personally, I'll take it as an unintentional compliment that the worst complaint he can dredge up about my work is that I don't waste my bloody time inventing new and hugely complicated spells for battle scenes. Anybody who actually reads my primary story will understand that wand magic only comprises Harry's opening strategy. He doesn't truly need his wand to win and he only uses the damned stick to get into a rhythm and perhaps frustrate and tire his opponents before getting into close quarters and demolishing them. And should all that fail, he plays his trump card and obliterates them with demonic energy. The spell compendium I use is good enough for Shezza, who uses spells from it all the time in his works, and his battle scenes are by and far the best in the entire fandom, period. So there goes the credibility about that argument.

    In the end, the fighting only consitutes a small part of what makes my work dynamic. I don't need to rely on bloodbaths to captivate an audience. The fights do help, and I haven't seen any credible criticism about how I've done them. I should think that's good enough seeing as many of the most gifted and creative authors in the fandom read and follow my work. My characters and plot are really the main focus. I prefer to think that Dakaath themes more around politics and manipulation with physical warfare taking a secondary role. As for my other fic, Harry is eleven. You can't expect him to be using super inventive magic and fighting like some magical war god. I also try to keep my characters realistic, unlike a certain case I can think of where all Harry's friends suddenly wake up one day and decide that he's evil and needs to be eradicated or whatever. When I change a character's outlook, I either provide a very good reason for it, or make the change gradual and detailed enough that it makes sense.
     
  12. Midknight

    Midknight Middy is SPAI! DLP Supporter Retired Staff

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    Ditto, while he didn't call me out as well in his rant( I think he may of meant to and saw the yellow name as Raven instead of me come to think of it, I think I slammed it in this thread), his general attitude in this post as well as one of his others he's made on this site has soured me on anything he might produce. I've since went back and skimmed the chapters, and they make me grimace.

    While WKGQ did have cliche moments, it was well written enough (not counting he ending) and at least showed a middle school level grasp of language and grammar. Yeah it may "only" be fanfiction, but if you're posting it for thousands to read, if you care about it enough to get bitchy over it, you should care about it enough to make it look good.
     
  13. Narf

    Narf Administrator Admin DLP Supporter

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    The guy had Ascension misspelled in the title when he first started posting the story. That right there is enough for me to shun the story. And, trust me, I'm a hugh nitpicker about grammar in stories, and this guys story was extremely horrible in that aspect.
     
  14. Necrule Paen

    Necrule Paen DLP Elite DLP Supporter

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    I have to agree about the grammar. When I started to read it the first five or so chapters were just horrendous. If it wasn't for all of the people who said how good it became, I would have stopped reading it. Later on in the story it isn't as bad either because he got better, he got a beta reader, or I am just used to it, but in any case it is a valid critique.
     
  15. Vorlon666

    Vorlon666 Guest

    Clarification!

    Hello Everyone

    It's been a while since I have loged onto this wonderful site. I would like to thank everyone who has supported my fic despite some of it's shortcomings. OF COURSE the shortcomings I am referring too are some of the minor grammar mistakes and some punctuation issues. I will be the first to admit that my native tong IS not English. That being said, I have had a good look at the stories that some of my critics have written and I honestly don't understand their bitch about my story!

    NOW in order to silence those critics, I have taken on myself to review every chapter that I have posted in order to fix as many grammar and punctuation issues as I can find. SO TO ALL MY FANS if I am late posting chapter 17 you now know why that is and you can blame it on the grammatically correct assholes who seem to think that Fan Fick is about winning a fucking Pulitzer prize.

    Now to be fare I do enjoy constructive and even flames to some extent. However, some of the shit my story has been taking is just plain fucking wrong. NOW, I ASK YOU READERS? what would you prefer, a Story that has perfect puntuation or a story that bases itself on complete originality? Some of my critics such as LORD RAVENCLAW, or LORD SARAPETH have hinted that I have used old cliche ideas on Dumbledore/ Ron/ Hermione WELL It's uterly fucking obvious to me that they have not fully read my story and understand where the betrayal starts.

    NOW to take a leaf out of their books, I went and read their storie's , and I must say, WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY COMPLAINING ABOUT MY STORY. Their stories lack imagination to say the least. Their attempt at explaining scientific principles where spells and metallurgy is concerned is a complete fucking farce. Lord Ravenclaw and Lord Sara whatever utterly lack originality in their spell work and scientific descriptions. What the FUCK is Mythril??? Never heard of it, however I can assure you that Rhenium is quite real, any decent chemistry books will tell you that. I guess what I am trying to say IS THAT PEOPLE LIVING IN FUCKING GLASS HOUSES SHOULD NOT THROW STONES!!!

    Some stories I have read are actually on par with my own in originality and content. Author IP82 is a good candiate. Keep up the good work. I really like your Story. As for my critics, make sure you know what the fuck you are talking about before cutting down other peoples work :evil: . Now because of all this fucking review, I'll be at least t'ill the end of January 2006 before I post Chapter 17.

    Any way, I would like to take this time and thank all my supporter's for the awsome reviews that I have received. I don't always answer my reviewers but I sure do appriciate them. As for my critics, they do provide some decent feed back at times, and at other times they could just eat the corn out of my shit.

    NOW for all my readers, I am planning a second story. IT will be a major anti slash work. I plan on making a lot of fudge packers very sad. Sorry but the Slash and Angst has really been getting to me. Well that is all for now. See you on the flip side :wink: .

    Vorlon666
     
  16. Narf

    Narf Administrator Admin DLP Supporter

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    Oh, ffs man, stop with the arguing. Everybody else has already forgotten about it, why can't you? Obviously, no matter what we say, the only thing you'll say is that grammar isn't important.

    Ahem, unlike you, I don't think Raven or Sera were trying to go for the science award.

    In response to your question...I wouldn't read a story if all it had was good grammar. But I wouldn't read a story if all it had was originality. I prefer for my stories to have both.
     
  17. Midknight

    Midknight Middy is SPAI! DLP Supporter Retired Staff

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    I'm sick of you insulting folks who are only being honest about your story, and giving you opinions on how to improve it. You're the first temp banned person here until you learn how the heck to speak to people, especially the folks that bust their butts to run this place. Much less replying several days after it's already been forgotten about.

    If you can't handle someone pointing out your flaws so you can make them better, you shouldn't be worry about what they say.

    I've had it with the nonstop bitch fests that have been going on whenever there is a major disagreement, especially over something as retarded as this. You could of simply said you'd work on it, and asked for help or shrugged it off, instead of carrying on like an arrogant ass.

    If you don't like this, feel free to keep it to yourself, but the constant damned flame bait will end now. We're growing, and we're not going to stand by and let folks have insult fests anymore, especially not over constructive criticism.
     
  18. Lord Ravenclaw

    Lord Ravenclaw System God Admin

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    For God's sake man, look at yourself. You speak of people unfairly flaming your story, yet when I give you a small bit of criticism you decide to slam mine. Before, I had never said a word against your story, only that they should press on through the beginning chapters to get to where the story really started getting good.

    Who gives a flying fuck if Mithril exists? I don't, and though that story needs rewriting, I fail to see why using a metal typically depicted in other stories (some of which were a BASIS for HP) is a problem. I don't exactly plan for Harry to enter the bloody science fair.

    Also, don't start jumping to conclusions or falsely accusing others.

    You'd do well to remember your own advice. I've never once insulted your work outside of constructive criticism. If you can't handle constructive criticism, don't ask for it.

    My spellwork (aside from the core spells) is all crafted through the use of Latin words, phrases, and grammar. I fail to see the unoriginality of that. I'll refrain from making any disparging comments aimed towards your spellwork.

    Don't think so highly of yourself to actually believe that we'd care if your temper tantrum pushed back your next chapter. I like your story, but I won't continue to defend it and constructively criticize it if all I get is flak in return.
     
  19. Dark Syaoran

    Dark Syaoran Persona 4 Admin

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    Mithril may not be real but you do realise that Harry Potter isnt either, right Vorlo?
     
  20. Antivash

    Antivash Until we meet again... DLP Supporter Retired Staff

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    Mithril or Mythril however you want to spell it is typically used in fantasy stories and I believe rendere most well known through Final Fantasy.

    Secondly, Ill second Raven and say Potter aint no fucking chemist. Ill even wager he dont know shit above 6th grade science.

    Im not the first to say my own story lacks in proper grammer, and i know while its not entirely original, time and again its the classics that most people enjoy. (Read: I dont give a damn so long as people enjoy it and i havefun writing it.)

    And i think i can safely say youve killed any support you might have gotten around here with you bitching. I take flak all the time over the depravity and lack of morals Soul has, and yet I still keep on truckin and aint said an unkind word to anyone about it.

    I will give you a bit of advice though. Get over yourself and get over it. No matter how perfect you story is, or how real t is, or how original, someone is going to hate it on mere principle...