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WIP Weeb by Andrius - M

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Owimbowé, May 9, 2017.

  1. Karling

    Karling Squib

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    It's pretty funny, but like others have said it feels like canon just with a smarter/wittier Harry. I would give it a 2/5 since it doesn't really have a very interesting plot or deep characters, but those few really funny moments where I laughed out loud earn it a 3/5.
     
  2. Rincasta

    Rincasta Squib

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    This story does what it says on the tin, it's a really funny story from an odd premise without much depth to it, however I can't really bring myself to criticise it for that because it doesn't claim to be anything more.
    4/5
     
  3. pbluekan

    pbluekan Professor DLP Supporter

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    This just updated.

    This fucking line:
    "Could've been worse," Tony said philosophically. "At least it's not scat."
     
  4. Burt

    Burt Fourth Year

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    While definitely entertaining, this fic has some MAYJOR flaws.

    First, and most gruesomely, it's a retelling of another fic by the same author (has anyone read the Saviour of Magic? Because if you have, :nyan:

    Secondly, there is no real character development to speak of. Due to the fact that the author races all the way through to the end of book six in less that 100k words, we the readers are left with not so much side characters as shrapnel-wounds of one-liners. In this short amount of wordage, we're supposed to believe that Harry's grown up with these OC's, but they all sort of read like potted plants. Indeed, the side characters are so poorly developed that they really serve more as distractions than anything else. While obviously it would be awful to just have Harry wander around by himself for six years, having a story suggest that he has a deep connection with characters with whom the reader has no connection whatsoever is somehow at least just as bad.

    There are other flaws I could go on to name, but I don't want this to be a wholly negative review, because this is not a wholly bad story. While it relies entirely on one-liners for its comedy, those one-liners are genuinely funny. While the plot is a cursory rehashing, that's better than an in depth rehashing.

    I just sincerely hope that the author plans to slow down eventually, because he's chewed up the canon material so fast that he's left little impression upon it.
     
  5. thoriyan

    thoriyan Slug Club Member

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    Canada, eh?
    Are you reviewing the same fic the rest of us are?
     
  6. The Pro

    The Pro Seventh Year

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    Hold your horses there, bro. This is the author of Saviour of Magic. This is the author of Weeb. They are two different people. And Weeb is nothing at all like Saviour of Magic. The differences in premise, tone, themes, style, etc are palpable.
     
  7. Burt

    Burt Fourth Year

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    Sorry if I wasn't clear. I blame the surprisingly high sugar content of the damn whiskey. Obviously Weeb and Saviour aren't by the same author. But the point I was trying to make is that Saviour, like Weeb, is a rehashing of another of the same author's previous stories (in the case of Weeb, it's a rehashing of Geek, while in the case of Saviour, it's a rehashing of Lightning Lord). I was just pointing out another similar situation. Weeb shares with Saviour the fact that it is in some ways more and in some ways less satisfying than the previous similar story. Anyone who's already read Geek will naturally compare Weeb to it as they go through it, and find that some things are better and some things are worse. Actually, though, all four of these stories, as well as the other content produced by their respective authors, are worth looking at.
     
  8. The Pro

    The Pro Seventh Year

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    Okay. It makes much more sense now that you've clarified.
     
  9. Burt

    Burt Fourth Year

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    My fault for not being clear and relying on :nyan:-chan to make everything clear.
     
  10. The Pro

    The Pro Seventh Year

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    Update.

    So. New update. Damn if it wasn't awesome.

    This chapter was a decent blend of humour, action and drama. The author really pulled off a brilliant chapter here. The twists were well executed too. The reveal of Draco, Pansy and Atticus as the Lestrange brothers and Bellatrix cemented this chapter as the best by far.

    Additionally, the battle scene was well executed. Rather than the standard fare of shield, stun, etc. the author mixed branches of magic. Transfiguration and Charms blended well to create an excellent action scene. Also, the descriptions were well done. I could perfectly imagine the chaos as the students fled, the fear, the adrenaline rush, the shock and all the other emotions.

    I may have been a tad harsh with my earlier review. If current trends continue, there's a possibility of this increasing to 4/5 by the time that this concludes. I'm looking forward to where Andrius will take Weeb from here.
     
  11. DrSarcasm

    DrSarcasm Unspeakable

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    This chapter was rather abrupt and jarring. Yes, the author stated that he was having trouble shifting into the more serious portions of the later books and decided to just wing it and that there were some time skips involved, but it was a bit more than that. Dumbledore's battle cry was rather out of character for me, and the sheer abruptness had me thinking up until the last section that it might all be a dream or something. We went from in the previous chapter "harem" shenanigans to Harry warning Dumbledore of Malfoy's plot to an over-the-top performance battle in far too short a span. The whole chapter felt off to me.
     
  12. The Pro

    The Pro Seventh Year

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    Weeb updated.

    Honestly, this chapter fell flat. Voldemort's defeat seemed like a foregone conclusion from the very inception. Andrius didn't manage to capture that menacing sense of foreboding that the characters should have been feeling prior to Harry battling Voldemort. This chapter required a more serious tone, but the writing didn't reflect that. There was just an undertone of humour that felt incongruous with the action.

    Looks like you were right DrSarcasm. Andrius must have winged it in writing this chapter. It was quite disappointing.
     
  13. The Pro

    The Pro Seventh Year

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    It's complete.

    My criticism is the same as last time. It feels like Andrius ran out of steam.

    Nonetheless, my overall enjoyment warrants a 4/5 rating for the fic.