Dark Lord Potter Forums Dark Lord Potter Forums  
Go Back   Dark Lord Potter Forums > Library > The Alternates
Donate Register Rules Library List IRC Chat FAQ Members List Social Groups Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Notices

Donate to DLP PatronusCharm Banner

 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 02-09-2015, 02:55 PM   #1
cowofdoom
Squib
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 16
Out of the Dark and into the Green By Chim Cheree - M

Title: Out of the Dark and into the Green
Author: Chim Cheree
Rating: M
Genre: Adventure/Mystery
Status: WIP
Library Category: The Alternates
Pairings: - (None so far)
Summary: Shortly before his 11th birthday, Harry Potter disappears from Privet Drive. Accidental Magic takes him halfway through the country, and while Harry tries to find his place in his new life of magic and mystery, the Wizarding World is left to deal with the consequences his disappearance.
Link: Link

I'm surprised this story hasn't been posted yet, since it has the driven, morally ambiguous Harry everyone here seems to be so fond of.

Only eight chapters (28k words), the story has a solid setup, following Harry from the age of ten to sixteen. Spelling needs some work though.

I would normally post this the 'almost recommend' thread, since the story is still in its infancy, but from what I have read (read: skimmed), it's highly encouraged to make new threads, so here it is.

4/5 (pending).
cowofdoom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-09-2015, 08:27 PM   #2
Mangafee
Muggle
 
Mangafee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 3
Send a message via Skype™ to Mangafee
It's not bad, though I'm usually not that fond of stories in which Harry is still a child, but I like the way he forms his opinions outside of society.
I did catch myself more skimming than reading this in parts--

However I also think that it's still too early to judge how good this might be or where exactly it's heading.
__________________
I need more Master of Death-Harry (sobs)
Mangafee is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-10-2015, 06:11 AM   #3
Scott
Seventh Year
 
Scott's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: President Paul
Age: 25
Gender: Male
Posts: 298
DLP Supporter Donor Star
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mangafee View Post
It's not bad, though I'm usually not that fond of stories in which Harry is still a child, but I like the way he forms his opinions outside of society.
I did catch myself more skimming than reading this in parts--

However I also think that it's still too early to judge how good this might be or where exactly it's heading.
I did the exact same thing and I agree it's still to early for me to rate. I think it could become library material and then again, not. Depends on how the story pans out. I think Harry's characterization is unique so-far though.
__________________

Scott is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-10-2015, 07:40 AM   #4
Stan
Order Member
 
Stan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 802
I like the story. It seemed to be a generic "Harry runs away from the Dursleys and is raised by someone else" fic at first, but the last two chapters show that there is more to the fic than that. The revelation of Al's identity was well done and I like the OC girl as a character. Harry's characterization is great too. I am rating it a tentative 4/5 for now, though its too early to tell for sure whether its library quality or not.
Stan is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 02-10-2015, 09:26 AM   #5
Radmar
Disappeared
 
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Czech Republic
Age: 26
Gender: Male
Posts: 339
I enjoyed it. It even seems to finally go somewhere, in the latest chapters. While true that it's quite soon to judge, I enjoyed it nevertheless. I am not sure whether it's library quality or not, but I rate 4/5, library be damned. It's good, and that's what matters.
Radmar is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-10-2015, 01:16 PM   #6
Russano
Disappeared
 
Join Date: Aug 2012
Gender: Male
Posts: 602
I enjoyed it as well. Too soon to really rate as we haven't seen all that much of an actual plot or where this is going.
Russano is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-10-2015, 02:04 PM   #7
Ferdiad
Auror
 
Ferdiad's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Limerick, Ireland
Gender: Male
Posts: 666
Read it all in one go. If the story continues at the current quality I can easily rate it 4/5.
Ferdiad is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-10-2015, 03:28 PM   #8
Ankan
Groundskeeper
 
Ankan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Northern Sweden
Gender: Male
Posts: 329
Same as the above. If it continues as it has sofar. 4/5
Ankan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2015, 11:12 AM   #9
IBG
Seventh Year
 
IBG's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 289
I'm really enjoying this.
 
The original take on Alphard Black as well as Harry's development as a character is great. I like how the author is placing an emphasis on showing Harry's motivations and humanity.


Going to give this a 5/5 and hope the author continues updating regularly.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Taure View Post
I can fully imagine Voldemort ... getting into futile arguments with people over the internet and then finding them and killing them

Last edited by IBG; 02-17-2015 at 11:38 AM.
IBG is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2015, 11:16 AM   #10
Stan
Order Member
 
Stan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 802
@IBG : Place your second sentence in spoilers please. It is one of the major revelations of the story, and it wouldn't do to spoil it here.
Stan is online now   Reply With Quote
Thumbs Up 2 thumbs up
Old 02-17-2015, 11:34 AM   #11
CrackedMind
Order Member
 
CrackedMind's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: New Jersey
Gender: Male
Posts: 858
It's a good read. I'm a little concerned with the most recent chapters because that whole
 
OC girlfriend (who I liked, but wasn't given nearly enough time for her character to grow) and her brother saga
was ridiculous, and I'm hoping that the ship rights itself before it gets too off course.

Right now, a 4/5. But that could go way down depending on the next couple of chapters.
__________________
Quote:
Freedom is a word long forgotten, an idea with no following in the world. Deep within the wilds of an undignified wasteland is a boy who dreamed of something bigger. A boy who dreamed of Revolution. AU
Acton's Heir
http://forums.darklordpotter.net/sho...118#post609118
CrackedMind is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-17-2015, 12:49 PM   #12
NuScorpii
Professor
 
NuScorpii's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Age: 27
Gender: Male
Posts: 434
I enjoyed it. It's a fun read. 4/5

I doubt the ship is anything more than a way to shape Harry's attitude towards muggles.
NuScorpii is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2015, 12:38 PM   #13
Stan
Order Member
 
Stan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 802
Hmmm. Updated.

Not quite sure what to think of it. It is a somewhat realistically done assassin!Harry, which is rare, but something about the narrative and dialogue seems a bit off to me. Perhaps it's the fact that almost every character has nearly the same character voice -- Lucius Malfoy did not sound nearly as arrogant and aristocratic as I would expect him to sound. And I'm pretty sure that Tom the Bartender had a distinct voice in canon, but he sounds the same as everyone else here.
Stan is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2015, 12:51 PM   #14
Odran
Heir
 
Odran's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2013
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,645
We didn't exactly get some lengthy interaction with them here, did we though? You can't expect them to linger for too long, because if they did chances are they'd recognize Harry.

Anyway, glad to see this updated, and even gladder that it's moving forward.
__________________
On into the void he flies. Unafraid. There is nothing in mere absence that might cow him. Or loneliness. Or the lack of maps or charts. For he is his own path. And he sees by his own light. We watch him from a great distance. From a vantage point no less subjective, no less absolute. And so it's hard to tell whether he imposes himself on the emptiness or becomes it.

Odran is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2015, 02:55 PM   #15
NuScorpii
Professor
 
NuScorpii's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Age: 27
Gender: Male
Posts: 434
Meh, I'm a bit conflicted about this one. A lot happened in this chapter, but it just didn't have the same impact as earlier chapters. The entire chapter fell flat, like a badly done narration. Despite that though, the plot seems to have progressed significantly and the overall story is still interesting.
NuScorpii is offline   Reply With Quote
Thumbs Up 1 Thumb Up
Old 04-29-2015, 03:11 PM   #16
Stan
Order Member
 
Stan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 802
Quote:
Originally Posted by NuScorpii View Post
Meh, I'm a bit conflicted about this one. A lot happened in this chapter, but it just didn't have the same impact as earlier chapters. The entire chapter fell flat, like a badly done narration. Despite that though, the plot seems to have progressed significantly and the overall story is still interesting.
My thoughts exactly. The earlier chapters were slower paced, but felt like better reads despite the fact. Let us hope that this chapter was merely the author trying to get into writing after a relatively long hiatus, and the story returns to its previous quality soon, while keeping the pacing of this chapter.
Stan is online now   Reply With Quote
Thumbs Up 1 Thumb Up
Old 05-01-2015, 07:07 PM   #17
newageofpower
Professor
 
newageofpower's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 476
DLP Supporter Donor Star
Ah. This story had an interesting premise, but little was written and the updates were not forthcoming. Its quite good though, potentially 4/5 material.

I'll withhold judgment for now.
__________________
Because.
newageofpower is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2015, 01:11 PM   #18
newageofpower
Professor
 
newageofpower's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 476
DLP Supporter Donor Star
Update.

I am disappointed in the length.
__________________
Because.
newageofpower is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2015, 09:07 AM   #19
illya_
Squib
 
illya_'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 15
Thirteenth chapter is out (after the author took a few months break)

Part one is done, and part two is "in progress".

I am really stoked about the next part, seeing how I think Harry's 'backstory' were this well made.

A lot of stories skim past his past and just text-dump "this has happened" which is the reason Harry has these thoughts, skills and so on. (or in worst case just changes Harry without a giving reason).

While I do call part one the backstory, it holds up as a story of its own. Being an enjoyable tale of how harry (continuation in spoiler)

 
finds himself with a new father figure, finds and loses his first love, from liking to resenting (if not hating) muggles and valuing his magic. Then abruptly having his father figure removed from him and thrown into this strange world were everyone for some strange reason is after or seem to know of him.

I like how Al tried to convey things he thought important to Harry while still being his own character, with a past, pride and emotions which guided his actions. And how their love and trust grew over the years.

I like how Voldermort could have an potential ally in Al and Harry, but because he and his death eathers acted like they normally would act, this did not happen. Even if Harry might agree with some of Voldemort's views he will never side with him after what happened with Al.

The gap between chapter 12 and 13 were a tad abrupt, but I assume we will get details as they haunt Harry's sleep, so not having to read about it twice or thrice would be a good thing.

Again, I'm really enthusiastic about this future 2nd part.


It might be because of how different this fic is, so it is harder to compare it to others. But I genuinely loved every moment of the story so far. It warrants my first five.

5/5
illya_ is offline   Reply With Quote
Thumbs Up 1 Thumb Up
Old 11-04-2015, 10:27 PM   #20
Suty
First Year
 
Suty's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 39
5/5 for me as well.

It's been a while since I've read this, but I remember being very impressed with the story.

It's not a canon rehash; there's no bashing; characters don't get hit with the dumbstick; it's very refreshing to not have to cringe at something in the story.

That said, I'm a bit apprehensive about the 2nd arc.

 

What I don't want to see is the typically shallow and badly written manipulative Dumbledore forcing Harry to attend Hogwarts or some other tripe and Harry turning into one of those too-cool-for-school types taking pleasure at sticking it to the headmaster.
Suty is offline   Reply With Quote

Tags
adventure, alternate universe, author: chim cheree, mystery


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Green Hornet QuaziJoe Movies, Music and TV shows 17 01-23-2011 10:07 PM
Green Eyes Sakuya Ernswa Introduction Archives [Closed] 66 05-05-2010 01:10 PM
Green-glowing monkeys have green-glowing babies Jamven Real Life Discussion 1 05-27-2009 09:52 PM
I Will Be Killing All of Green Day Giovanni Real Life Discussion 94 03-19-2007 08:52 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 03:10 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Copyright ©2005 - 2016 DLP Group. All rights reserved.
No personal intellectual property on this site may be used without the credit and express permission of the respective authors.