Dark Lord Potter Forums Dark Lord Potter Forums  

Go Back   Dark Lord Potter Forums > Library > Almost Recommended
Donate Register Rules Library List IRC Chat FAQ Members List Social Groups Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Notices

Donor Bar
PatronusCharm Banner

 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 09-06-2015, 07:41 AM   #1
Stan
Order Member
 
Stan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 806
It Happened Like This by Awakening5 - T

Title: It Happened Like This
Author: Awakening5
Rating: T
Genre: Humor/Romance
Pairing: Harry P., Ginny W.
Chapters: 8
Words: 20,537
Updated: Mar 18, 2014
Published: Feb 7, 2014
Status: Complete

Summary:
Fred and George Weasley decide to relate this AU "When Harry Met Ginny" together. Their versions don't always match up, nor do the two always stay on topic. But when all is said and done, the twins manage to get the point across.

Link: It Happened Like this



A well written and reasonably fun tale. The plot itself is the cliched Sirius-raises-Harry that has been done a million times before, and the romance is generic, but since the story is told in Fred and George's usual humorous and chaotic style, it manages to be different and moderately entertaining. It is just 20k words, so it doesn't get much of an opportunity to drag on, though I was getting a bit impatient by the end.


Edit by Minion, October 3, 2015
Moved out of the Almost Recced Thread.
To be moved out of For Review October 24.

Last edited by Dark Minion; 10-03-2015 at 04:42 PM.
Stan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-03-2015, 05:35 PM   #2
Dark Minion
Moderator
Bright Minion
 
Dark Minion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Gender: Special Snowflake
Posts: 2,217
DLP Supporter Donor Star
This thread was once part of the (now named) "New and Almost Recommended Harry Potter Fanfiction" thread.

I moved it here as it is complete and thus deserves its own thread.
__________________
Found something decent to read? Put it up for review:


Looking for a fandom?


Dark Minion is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2015, 11:51 AM   #3
Darth V
First Year
 
Darth V's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Natal, Brazil
Gender: Male
Posts: 40
DLP Supporter Donor Star
Couldn't even finished the first chapter. The way it's written is plain terrible. Although the ideia of Fred and George telling people the story about how the couple in question got together sounds really interesting, the entire fic is written like a dialogue between the two of them and, like I said, it's poorly written. Also there are no indications of it being a dialogue, like hyphens, quotation marks or anything like that, just a bunch of sentences with paragraph breaks whenever the speaker changes. It's boring and confusing, to be honest.

Also, although English is not my first language, I could find a couple of mistakes in grammar, the biggest of them (up to the point I read) being the "I not having the facts right?" sentence at the very beginning.

1/5
__________________
Quote:
As far as PoA being the best (because it was), I feel that's because Harry's success in that instance had to do with working for an entire year to master powerful magic, using a blend of theoretical knowledge and force of will that was perhaps never done as well in the books again. It was an immensely refreshing change to see Harry use his own characteristics to do something truly amazing, something Hermione had not done yet, couldn't do, even if she knew the incantation. It was like solid proof that he should have been the protagonist, that magic was more than memorizing what the book said and waving your wand in a strange pattern.
(afrojack)
Darth V is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2015, 12:54 PM   #4
Ptolemy XII
Squib
 
Join Date: Oct 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 7
It's a brilliant and original idea but the style and grammar is a bit jarring. The author structured the sentences in a rather strange way, so it's difficult to read.

The grammar isn't too bad but the author could do with a solid beta or with brushing up on their grammar rules.

All in all, the story seems choppy; it doesn't flow. It's entirely possible that's intended as there's two narrators though. Having Harry referred to as "the boy-who-lived-and-vanished" and Sirius as "Sir Padfoot" nearly every five lines isn't too great.

Pardon me if I'm wrong, but it comes off as a poor attempt as an epic. 2/5 for a poor execution of a nice idea

Last edited by Ptolemy XII; 10-07-2015 at 12:57 PM.
Ptolemy XII is offline   Reply With Quote

Tags
author: awakening5, complete, harry/ginny


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
To My New Minions :) shadownin Introduction Archives [Closed] 16 05-19-2008 12:22 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 07:53 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Copyright ©2005 - 2016 DLP Group. All rights reserved.
No personal intellectual property on this site may be used without the credit and express permission of the respective authors.