Dark Lord Potter Forums Dark Lord Potter Forums  
Go Back   Dark Lord Potter Forums > Library > The Alternates
Donate Register Rules Library List IRC Chat FAQ Members List Social Groups Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Notices

Donate to DLP PatronusCharm Banner

 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 01-10-2016, 02:26 PM   #1
Dark Minion
Moderator
Bright Minion
 
Dark Minion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Gender: Special Snowflake
Posts: 2,216
DLP Supporter Donor Star
Minato Namikaze and the Destroyer of Worlds By The Carnivorous Muffin - T - HP/Naruto

Title: Minato Namikaze and the Destroyer of Worlds
Author: The Carnivorous Muffin
Rating: Fiction T
Genre: Adventure/Friendship
DLP-Category: The Alternates
Pairing: none yet
Chapters: 5
Words: 36,081
Updated: January 10, 2016
Published: December 14, 2015
Status: Work in Progress
Summary:
On October 10th when the Kyuubi no Kitsune ravages Konoha, Namikaze Minato unwittingly makes a bargain with Death. Years earlier, his life is rewritten when the overpowered, bizarre, and possibly alien Eleanor Lily Potter arrives at Konoha's orphanage and quickly becomes his best friend.

Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/1166679...oyer-of-Worlds


This is another story started by The Carinvorous Muffin, as a spin off or an alternate universe to her story "Lily and the Art of Being Sisyphus". You don't need to read that story to understand this one, but if you enjoy one of these, you'll likely enjoy the other as well.


As indicated in the summary the story starts with the day the Kyuubi attacks Konoha - in two sentences - and then jumps years back in time, to the day Jiraiya meets his new team of genins: Team 7, with the boys Namikaze Minato and Matsuda Haru, and the girl Eru Lee.

Eru Lee is the weirdest of the three, having suddenly appeared in Konoha's orphanage as a five year old, speaking nothing but gibberish. She soon became friends with Minato and now both are the top students of the academy. But Eru Lee is as socially inept as any of the Knote bros. and Minato is the only one she really is connected to. He helps her mastering all social challenges she can't solve by using chakra.

Eru Lee is actually "Eleanor Lily Potter" - but no one was able to pronounce it correctly. She doesn't know about magic, doesn't really know about the differences of magic and chakra and doesn't believe in any limitations of her abilities. She doesn't need to use seals, she just does what she wants to achieve. She also doesn't realise yet, that she is actually Death and can't die (if she really got the same background as 'Lily' in the other story).


At 5 chapters and 36,000 words by now, the story covered the first interaction of Team 7 with Jiraiya, the annoying D-ranks and their first C-rank mission, and their interaction with Orochimaru, who is still in his laboratories in Konoha.

Considering the short intro-scene of the first chapter, the author probably has a goal in mind, but I assume in the end the story will go nowhere and end up abandoned. At the moment the author has a decent update rate, especially if you also count the oneshots she publishes as side fics to the main story (1 per 100 reviews). But soon another plotbunny will haunt her, she will start another story, the update rate will drop and eventually stop. At least that's what happened to her other novels.

Thus this is nothing I read with the expection of a culminating showdown (kill Voldemort, destroy Akatsuki), but I enjoy the description of a god-like, half-autistic girl and her more or less every-day interactions with the cast of pre-Naruto Konoha.

Nevertheless it is a really great read, especially if you enjoyed some of Carnivorous' other stories. Some short scenes remind me of Rorschacht, but are definitely better written and fit into the whole plotline. She claims she apparently never watched or read Naruto, only Naruto-fanfiction, but as far as I can see, she seems to have a good grasp of the universe.

For me it is an easy 4/5.
__________________
Found something decent to read? Put it up for review:


Looking for a fandom?


Dark Minion is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2016, 03:26 PM   #2
CheddarTrek
Moderator
Set Phasers to Melt
 
CheddarTrek's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Mississippi
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,821
DLP Supporter Donor Star
I agree with the 4/5 rating. It's a very strange story, and I'm not sure I'd have enjoyed it nearly as much if I hadn't already read the author's HP fic featuring the same OC, but yeah.

I think my favorite parts have to be the ones with Orochimaru.

The story has covered a decent bit of ground - it doesn't move slowly - but I'm not sure what the overarching plot will be yet. Or even if there will be one at all, frankly. I'm not worried though, since the HP fic feels a bit aimless as well and it's never approached boring.
__________________
Someone once told me that time was a predator that stalked us all our lives. But I rather believe than time is a companion who goes with us on the journey, and reminds us to cherish every moment because they'll never come again. What we leave behind is not as important how we lived. After all, Number One, we're only mortal.
~Jean-Luc Picard

CheddarTrek is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2016, 10:22 PM   #3
A Lightning
Slug Club Member
 
A Lightning's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Los Angeles
Age: 21
Gender: Male
Posts: 189
I'm not quite sure how to rate this story.

It's well written, and the premise is amusing... but that's really all it is. There's no tension in the plot, no feelings of suspense in the story, and nothing to really make me invested in where the story is going to go.

That's not to say a story needs these things to be good, but at the same time, I'm not really that invested in the characters, and without much interest in the plot or the characters, the story as a whole feels somewhat lacking.

3/5 from me.
__________________
I recommend Prismata, a fast paced strategy game unlike anything else.
Ask me for an alpha key! • Prismata in 60 seconds
---
SteamMy Anime ListTwitch (I stream Prismata)
A Lightning is online now   Reply With Quote
Thumbs Up 1 Thumb Up
Old 01-10-2016, 11:42 PM   #4
Palindrome
Moderator
Magma Moderator
 
Palindrome's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: England
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,335
DLP Supporter Donor Star
Send a message via Skype™ to Palindrome
I really like this story and I've been following it since it began, but it feels a quite flat to me compared to The Art of Being Sisyphus. I think it started as just another one-shot spinoff from the main story, but was fun enough to continue. I'm glad of that - it's great fun to read. But I'm not sure that it actually can hold up on its own.

For one, if you haven't read Lily and the Art of Being Sisyphus, I don't think you'll enjoy it nearly as much. It lacks a lot of depth and explanation, because that's already in the main story.

But this story definitely goes a great job of adding to the tale of Lily - in this universe we see everything about her in a very different light. There's something very charming about The Carnivorous Muffin's stories - they're so very different from anything most of us are used to seeing.

Ultimately, while it does feel a bit flat that doesn't change the fact that it is really entertaining. The story is mainly about exploring Lily's insanity and the effects she has on the world, and I often find the humour in it all is pretty good.

I'll give this a 4/5 - with a disclaimer that you should definitely read The Art of Being Sisyphus first.
__________________

YOU MUST BUILD IN BLUE

"Stop strapping everything that moves to the altar table already!"
STEAM PROFILE
Palindrome is offline   Reply With Quote
Thumbs Up 3 thumbs up
Old 01-11-2016, 01:07 PM   #5
MsCalypso
First Year
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Belgium
Gender: Female
Posts: 35
I read it and I had very weird feeling about the story. It's not that it's bad, definitely not, it has this amusing sense to it that made me keep on reading, but like mentioned here before, it doesn't have any debt. I feel like I'm missing something, that there should be something more.

On the other hand, it has been pointed out that one should read Lily the Art of Being Sisyphus and that this story should make a bit more sense then. So I'll go do that now, and maybe reread this again and who knows, it might feel different then.

A tentative 3/5
MsCalypso is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-11-2016, 04:38 PM   #6
Lungs
KT Loser
Waver Velvet
 
Lungs's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: i love girl's generation tbh
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,791
DLP Supporter Donor Star
Send a message via Skype™ to Lungs
4/5

It was really easy to read and lots of it made me smile. It's the sort of story that knows what it is, I think. I found myself curious less about the plot (which is kind of thin) than the characters I guess.

It's somewhat limited by the distinct lack of conflict, but you really can't have everything.
__________________
i'm a victim of having read the words
"hermione-nee-chan"
and now you are as well
Lungs is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-12-2016, 07:55 AM   #7
Palindrome
Moderator
Magma Moderator
 
Palindrome's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: England
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,335
DLP Supporter Donor Star
Send a message via Skype™ to Palindrome
There are a few oneshot spin-offs from this story, by the way:

The Temptation of Desperate Men
Quote:
In which, in an act of desperation, Madara chooses an apprentice much sooner than he expected before Konoha can become more absurd and more dangerous. Unfortunately, he chooses the first one he finds, which happens to be the overpowered and socially oblivious Eru Lee. Side fic to "Minato Namikaze and the Destroyer of Worlds"
It's a Wonderful Life
Quote:
After the disastrous confrontation with Lee's assailant during their first C-rank Lee teleports herself and Minato to an unfamiliar Konoha decades in the future. There they are forced to confront the world where Lee doesn't exist and Lee's own growing illness. Side fic to "Minato Namikaze and the Destroyer of Worlds"
A Brief Parlor Comedy with Divine and Terrible Beings
Quote:
Kurama, the Kyuubi no Kitsune, has his first impression of Eru Lee and concludes that humans are not only idiots but also great fools. Lee also sticks her foot into her mouth slightly more than she normally does in any given conversation. Side fic to "Minato Namikaze and the Destroyer of Worlds"
__________________

YOU MUST BUILD IN BLUE

"Stop strapping everything that moves to the altar table already!"
STEAM PROFILE
Palindrome is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-19-2016, 08:35 PM   #8
Drake
Seventh Year
 
Drake's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Virginia
Age: 25
Gender: Male
Posts: 269
Send a message via AIM to Drake
I always enjoy the stories Carnivorous Muffin writes. It's easy to jump right in because the main character is always some variation of Death and it makes every interaction interesting. None of these stories have any real tension to them for that same reason, but it makes them fairly breezy reads full of purple prose. I'm enjoying Ellie screwing with the Naruto universe just as much as she is with the HP universe.

4/5
__________________

Drake is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 01-19-2016, 11:44 PM   #9
Silly
First Year
 
Silly's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 40
I read and enjoyed Lily and the Art of Being Sisyphus, and this is much of the same. Great writing style, really offbeat humor, very little plot progression but somehow it ends up being fine.

Also, similar to her other story, there is tension hinted, but you know it's going to be super far off and the plot just sort of trudges along at its own pace, and you get tons of silly scenarios instead of actiony plot driven stuff. It definitely appeals to me but I can tell that it isn't for everybody.

Also, I recommend reading her spin off of the spin off, "It's a Wonderful Life". I think it's fantastic, combining the whole Lily Potter universe with a bit more of a serious and heartfelt ending.

Overall, I rated this a 4/5. I was wavering between a 4 and 5, so if the fic continues to remain high quality I may revise my vote upwards.
Silly is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-03-2016, 04:13 PM   #10
Dark Minion
Moderator
Bright Minion
 
Dark Minion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Gender: Special Snowflake
Posts: 2,216
DLP Supporter Donor Star
The story updated two days ago. This chapter is more serious and might become a turning point for the story:

 
Lee meets Death!Harry for the very first time. Not in the train station but in a different, more universe-fitting location. She now knows about her 'nature' as Death.
__________________
Found something decent to read? Put it up for review:


Looking for a fandom?


Dark Minion is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-04-2016, 07:20 AM   #11
Drake
Seventh Year
 
Drake's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Virginia
Age: 25
Gender: Male
Posts: 269
Send a message via AIM to Drake
Also, I like that its sort of speeding up certain developments compared to the original.

 
Lily's already off-handedly mentioned that she died and came back. Also, that next chapter will be discussing that further.
__________________

Drake is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 02-07-2016, 01:19 PM   #12
heytherebam
Squib
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 5
An amusing fic. It is well-written with believable characterizations, and some funny scenes. It doesn't quite manage to build suspense with the main character being what she is.
4/5 for being well-written.
heytherebam is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-27-2016, 07:04 AM   #13
Dark Minion
Moderator
Bright Minion
 
Dark Minion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Gender: Special Snowflake
Posts: 2,216
DLP Supporter Donor Star
There is a new side story with Team 7 and the Nindaime travelling to Surrey:

English Vacation - Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/1177903...glish-Vacation
Jiraiya gets a hold of Lee's Hogwarts Admission Letter and team 7, plus retired hokage, go off to investigate Lee's origins. Meanwhile Lee becomes frustrated that no one besides her seems to realize that reality is in fact a giant illusion that is in the process of breaking apart. Side fic to "Minato Namikaze and the Destroyer of Worlds"

In the end, the author announces England will make its appearance in the main story later on.
__________________
Found something decent to read? Put it up for review:


Looking for a fandom?


Dark Minion is offline   Reply With Quote
Thumbs Up 1 Thumb Up
Old 02-28-2016, 05:12 AM   #14
Haze
Second Year
 
Haze's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Estonia
Gender: Male
Posts: 68
I actually disagree with Drome about this. I read this one first, and found it much superior to its HP counterpart. The HP was just felt extremely boring, to be honest. Being extremely overpowered in the Naruto-verse is much more interesting than in the HP one.

The cast of this one is a lot more interesting as well. I really like Minato in this one. Not to mention that Eru Lee is just great. Maybe its because Death has a closer spot in her heart in this one. The scene where they first met was just amazing.

I'd give this 5/5 just from the sheer enjoyment of it.
Haze is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-29-2016, 10:04 AM   #15
CheddarTrek
Moderator
Set Phasers to Melt
 
CheddarTrek's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Mississippi
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,821
DLP Supporter Donor Star
I think the new side story Minion linked (English Vacation) is my favorite side story so far.
__________________
Someone once told me that time was a predator that stalked us all our lives. But I rather believe than time is a companion who goes with us on the journey, and reminds us to cherish every moment because they'll never come again. What we leave behind is not as important how we lived. After all, Number One, we're only mortal.
~Jean-Luc Picard

CheddarTrek is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2016, 06:44 AM   #16
Plotless
Groundskeeper
 
Plotless's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: England
Posts: 357
Updated
__________________
A good pun is its own reword.
Plotless is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-14-2016, 02:42 PM   #17
Dark Minion
Moderator
Bright Minion
 
Dark Minion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Gender: Special Snowflake
Posts: 2,216
DLP Supporter Donor Star
Another update, now with a philosophical note.

Quote:
In which the sandaime is too old for this bullshit but Tsunade is too young for it, the sannin plus Sakumo all get very drunk trying to understand just what happened and Orochimaru's feelings, and Eru Lee reveals that she learned absolutely nothing in the academy.
Towards the end Tobirama and Tsunade notice something very interesting which might move the plot forward.
__________________
Found something decent to read? Put it up for review:


Looking for a fandom?


Dark Minion is offline   Reply With Quote
Thumbs Up 2 thumbs up
Old 07-17-2016, 06:10 PM   #18
Nazgus
Auror
 
Nazgus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: USA
Gender: Male
Posts: 684
Another side-fic was also released:

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/1205432...-and-Fishcakes
Quote:
Panicking in the middle of the plant zombie battle, Eru Lee accidentally whisks team seven and the nidaime decades into an alternate dimension's future. There they discover a few of the surprising elements to this other world while the other world discovers a few aspects of Eru Lee. Side fic to "Minato Namikaze and the Destroyer of Worlds"
Essentially Team Seven and Tobirama get transported to the canon universe, near the start of the series. Highlights include Minato's reaction to having a son, and Eru Lee's insistence that she'd make a better godfather than Jiraya.
__________________
http://steamcommunity.com/id/demorte

Quote:
Originally Posted by Menace View Post
"Be my friend, motherfucker!" Naruto howled, slamming the rasengan into Gaara's face.
When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, "Why god? Why me?" and the thundering voice of God answered, "There's just something about you that pisses me off."

-Stephen King
Nazgus is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 07-21-2016, 03:05 AM   #19
CheddarTrek
Moderator
Set Phasers to Melt
 
CheddarTrek's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Mississippi
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,821
DLP Supporter Donor Star
Update! A good update too, imo. We got some genuine progression on LV, a few fun character moments, and a real sense of 'movement' with regards to things.
__________________
Someone once told me that time was a predator that stalked us all our lives. But I rather believe than time is a companion who goes with us on the journey, and reminds us to cherish every moment because they'll never come again. What we leave behind is not as important how we lived. After all, Number One, we're only mortal.
~Jean-Luc Picard

CheddarTrek is offline   Reply With Quote
Thumbs Up 1 Thumb Up
Old 07-21-2016, 11:40 AM   #20
Zel
Groundskeeper
 
Zel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Brazil
Gender: Male
Posts: 356
Eh, Danzo isn't as old as the author thinks, he'd be around his forties in this place of the timeline, and his voice sounded off. Storming off and bitching about her to 'rethink her choices' doesn't seem in character, he's more of the type to force her in a situation where she has little choice but to follow him. Not that any of the characterizations are strictly in tune with canon's, but Danzo's was especially glaring.

Still, it was a good chapter.
Zel is online now   Reply With Quote
Thumbs Up 1 Thumb Up

Tags
adventure, alternate universe, author: the carnivorous muffin, crossover, friendship, humor, naruto


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
WIP - October by The Carnivorous Muffin - T Dark Minion Almost Recommended 18 11-24-2016 03:21 PM
WIP - Lily and the Art of Being Sisyphus by The Carnivorous Muffin Stan Humor 88 08-27-2016 09:49 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:13 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Copyright ©2005 - 2016 DLP Group. All rights reserved.
No personal intellectual property on this site may be used without the credit and express permission of the respective authors.