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Old 05-24-2008, 02:19 AM   #1
Anomie
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What He Eats by Alchemia

Title: What He Eats
Author: Alchemia
Rating: T
Genre: Action/Adventure
DLP Category: General
Pairing: N/A
Status: Complete
Summary: "After Hepzibah's death, Voldemort sets out to find the Noah-like Utnapishtimn, an unique case of a human who has escaped death."

Link: http://community.livejournal.com/rid...tml?style=mine


The fic is pretty interesting and different IMO. Voldemort sets off to find the secrets of immortality, meets some characters from Babylonian legends, meets some Babylonian gods, and some future allies. The style (sort of mythic and the fading-in-and-out of the damaged discs) was kinda cool too.
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Last edited by Anomie; 05-24-2008 at 07:25 PM. Reason: Fixed
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Old 05-24-2008, 02:54 AM   #2
The Dark Monarch
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Have you read the stickies or are you just stumbling around blindly?
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Old 05-24-2008, 07:08 AM   #3
Methene
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Here, I'll fix this for you:

Title: What He Eats
Author: Alchemia
Rating: T
Genre: Action/Adventure
DLP Category: General
Pairing: N/A
Status: WIP
Summary: After Hepzibah's death, Voldemort sets out to find the Noah-like Utnapishtimn, an unique case of a human who has escaped death.

Link: http://community.livejournal.com/rid...tml?style=mine

Now I haven't actually read it, so I can't comment. The premise is interesting, but it seems rather short and the location being Livejournal gives me second thoughts.

Actually, I glanced at it now, and I don't recommend it. Let me give you an example of a "chapter":

 
For six days and seven nights, the sun rose and set.
For six days and seven nights, Voldemort drank an alertness potion.
For six days and seven nights, Utnapishtim's wife marked the time by baking a loaf of bread.
For six days and seven nights, Voldemort ate fresh bread drizzled with honey and milk.
For six days and seven nights, time stood still.


I like mine a little less surrealist and longer.
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Last edited by Methene; 05-24-2008 at 07:11 AM.
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Old 05-24-2008, 07:10 AM   #4
Lucullus
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The writing is actually pretty good, but my enjoyment of the fic is adversely affected by the fact that there are so many missing chunks of text.

3/5
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Old 05-24-2008, 08:49 AM   #5
Ikaros Mephisto
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I was very wary of this ficlet, I can't really bring myself to call it a fic. It's not long enough. I went in expecting to give this a 1/5 but it surprised me somewhat.

At first blush it appears well written, nothing that stood out to me. The presentation is unusual to say the least: Chapters that come forth as though having been recovered from outdated 3.5-inch floppy disks
. The whole
 
asking the Gods
aspect of the ficlet made me cringe somewhat, that tends to be written quite badly.

The Author seems to have made a bit of a double premise, both answering a challenge, (the author calls it a "request") and the added premise of "saving" a long lost fic, with text from this supposed "lost" fic being missing.

At first the presentation annoyed me. It came off as though the Author had just written out ideas and didn't know how to combine them. After a while the presentation stopped being bothersome and instead the author came off as being lousy at restoration. And I did find myself starting to like this, but the presentation still needs work. It's different and therefore harder to swallow, making it need to have higher standards.

I'd say close to 3/5 for overall story and being able to pull off the idea, but really it lands itself on 2/5 due to the presentation issues. I’d only recommend this to people who can stomach odd presentations.

Last edited by Ikaros Mephisto; 05-24-2008 at 08:55 AM. Reason: Screwed up when copy/pasting from word
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Old 05-24-2008, 06:28 PM   #6
Anomie
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I screwed up the format, yeah. Sorry about that.
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Don't fear God,
Don't worry about death;
What is good is easy to get, and
What is terrible is easy to endure.

- Philodemus, Herculaneum Papyrus, 1005, 4.9-14
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Old 05-27-2008, 02:33 PM   #7
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I like odd presentations, and I definitely liked the fic. It had to have been hard for the author to have pulled all of it off. Nicely done.

3.25/5.
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Last edited by Mors; 05-27-2008 at 04:43 PM.
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