This thread evolved from a discussion in Pet Peeves v.9. We were having argument about the proper use of 'Merlin's beard' rather than 'Jesus Christ' (or vice versa). Most people seem satisfied with Harry and Hermione using "Oh, Merlin!" as a swear rather than "God!" or "Jesus!", but there are also people who are annoyed by it. Mostly, these is because of overuse by certain authors, but even really good ones can improperly (or annoyingly) use these euphemisms.

This got me thinking: how can DLP begin to change/add to the normal euphemisms used in canon?

Let's start with a basic definition (just to keep people on subject):

A good canon example:

A fanon example:

Obviously, the more shocking, the less likely it will catch on, but perhaps we make some pretty decent ones that will actually be useable in fanfiction (or, conversely, ones that we've already seen used to great effect in FF).

Small suggestion to start: "one too many Sugar Quills"

To be used instead of saying someone is overweight/eats too much sweets.

 

"Bludger her quaffle."

To be used when a randy wizard is talking about sticking it in a witch. Example: "I'd stick my bludger so far up her quaffle she'd be out for weeks!"

 

I was wondering how long it would take to see a quote from Bromance. 9 minutes, apparently. I was expecting "Railroad her like the Hogwarts' Express!"

 

Canon euphemisms? The books were written for kids, it's not much she could've written without sending the so-called "Morals Guardians" panties in a twist, even through euphemisms.

 

Doesn't stop them from being used. Just because they aren't explicit, doesn't mean people wouldn't've used them.

 

"By all the hairs in the whiskers of Kûrvi-Tasch!"

Wait, wrong story.

 

She went around it by getting crap past the radar. This page has some good examples.

 

Just thought of one:

"Salazar's Vanishing Balls!"

Is good or bad? I'm I trying too hard?

 

Bad. You're trying too hard.