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WIP Beyond the Curtain by Bobika - T

Discussion in 'The Alternates' started by TieHat, Feb 24, 2019.

  1. TieHat

    TieHat Groundskeeper

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    Title: Beyond the Curtain
    Author: Bobika
    Rating: T
    Genre: Adventure/Drama
    Status: In-Progress
    Library Category: The Alternates
    Pairings: None
    Summary: "I'm going to make you immortal, Harry. The least you can do in exchange is to stay civil." - in which Voldemort learns the truth behind Harry's scar and the world changes greatly for it. AU from the Battle of Hogwarts. Powerful!Harry. Independent and at times mature, too.
    Ff.net Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13047893/1/Beyond-the-Curtain
    DLP WbA: https://forums.darklordpotter.net/threads/beyond-the-curtain.35957/

    So this story has been in WbA for a while now and I'm honestly surprised that nobody else has put it up for review.

    This story is honestly a masterpiece that deserves to be recognized. The world is pieced together in a brilliant manner and it is one of the few AU stories I have seen in my years reading fanfiction that manages to build a captivating world without a series of infodumps.

    The author has also managed to create not only a main character, but a supporting that is honestly engaging. The relationships among the group, how everything is playing out, it's simply great.

    The story is still ongoing but if the author keeps it up, it may go on to become a top fic in this fandom.

    Edit: Realized I forgot a rating. 5/5 for the reasons above.

    Edited by Ched to change summary at author's request.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 3, 2019
  2. Dario

    Dario Squib

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    This story is a masterpiece so far.

    It’s an incredible take on a dystopian world that’s been ruled by Voldemort for many years. Harry is mysterious and the characters around him play off one another well. The author does a very good job of telling just enough to keep you intrigued - I don’t believe there’s a single instance that felt like a clear info dump. Every answer the characters get have them asking more questions in a way that feels surprisingly satisfying.

    I think it was an amazing idea to have the story written from Neville’s POV. The readers have no idea what’s going on, and Neville reflects that quite well. The world the author has built is masterfully done and I can’t wait to see how he pulls it all together.

    Harry is undoubtably the best part of this story. His motivations are just as mysterious as his capabilities and his past. No one quite knows everything Harry’s done and it makes his presence all the more potent regardless of whether he’s in the scene or not.

    If there’s ever been a story that deserves a perfect score from me, it’s this one for sure.

    5/5
     
  3. Sataniel

    Sataniel Professor

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    Damn, I always ignored the WbA thread because based on the title I assumed it's another of those lazy "Harry falls/jumps/get sucked into Veil of Death and ends up being isekaied" but this actually looks interesting.
     
  4. TieHat

    TieHat Groundskeeper

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    Completely relate. I ignored it because it was Neville's POV and I thought the author was trying to make an otherwise cliche story unique and couldn't pull it of.
     
  5. Andrela

    Andrela Plot Bunny DLP Supporter

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    The worldbuilding is exquisite, I find myself waiting for new chapters with interest.

    5/5
     
  6. Nexis

    Nexis First Year

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    Yeah, I also initially ignored this cause the story didn't seem like anything I'd normally read. However, I gave it a chance today, and read the whole thing in a few hours. Definitely a 5/5 from me, I was completely immersed. There were only a few typos here and there but nothing to worry about.

    One thing though, I'd like to see Harry in a magical fight sometime soon, I'm curious as to his skills. It could even be a sparring with one of the other characters or something. Basically what I mean is, I'd like to see some ass kicking.

    But if you don't plan on anything like that soon, that's also okay, I'm loving the story as it is.
     
  7. Krieger

    Krieger Minister of Magic DLP Supporter

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    Yeah, I also ignor- lies. I've read it, loved it, easy 5/5.

    Great world building, compelling characters, interesting intrigue and mystery. One of the best fanfics you will read.
     
  8. Bobika

    Bobika First Year

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    Oh, there will be plenty of ass kicking, you don't need to worry about that.

    I knew the title would bite me in the ass but the moment I thought of the name, I knew it was staying. It fits too well to drop it.

    I'm all the more thankful that you guys are putting in a good word for the story. This is incredibly encouraging; I've been typing like a machine!

    But yeah, let me state it clearly: the title has nothing to do with the Veil of Death, but it has lots to do with the Iron Curtain that once divided the world in a similar way the magical one does in this story.
     
    Last edited: Feb 26, 2019
  9. Barzûl

    Barzûl Third Year DLP Supporter DLP Silver Supporter

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    I've been following this story for a while now and it has great world building.
    I'm pretty much checking every day for new updates and I have already reread it once, so I would be dishonest to myself if I rated it below 5/5.

    It will be interesting to see how everything ties together in the endgame. While it thrives on its character interactions, a bad final third of the story could drag it down to 4 stars. That is the one thing where this story could trip over its own feet, but I'm optimistic.

    5/5
     
  10. Blorcyn

    Blorcyn Auror DLP Supporter DLP Silver Supporter

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    I haven't caught up yet because of things, but I made it far enough to say that this a top notch story.

    It excels in characterisation, world building and dialogue.

    I'm yet to see how the plot progresses, but the vividness of the AU has captured my imagination in the way only a few AUs have before, like Skitterleap and Lords of Magic.

    When I read updates, I feel like I can almost smell the forest, or the smoke in the air or what have you. It's definitely a four or a five from me, I'll just have to catch up to be sure.
     
  11. Shodan

    Shodan First Year

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    So, I started writing a review after reading the first few chapters, but then I finished the story and my opinion changed a bit. As the others have previously said, the story being told from Neville's perspective is one of the things that kept me from reading this, but the author does a great job. Harry is one of the best parts of the story, his background and motivation being an engaging mystery. I don't really get what he's doing: It is implied that he's fighting against Voldemort, but so far nothing he does seems to have a real impact, and Voldemorts control seems absolute. But well- I'm sure we'll learn more about this in the upcoming chapters.

    The world building is good (and there are so few fics with any decent worldbuilding that this gets an extra point), but there are parts of it that I dislike: Guns and muggle weapons play a pretty big role in this, and while I don't want to say anything else about this topic (the wizards vs muggles thing has been discussed thousands of times), it makes the story feel a lot less like Harry Potter. That only changed in the last few chapters, after the group got their wands back and more canon characters were introduced.

    The writing itself is good, and it has significantly improved after the beginning. At first, there were quite a few errors, repetitions etc., but in the more recent parts of the story those are mostly gone.

    All in all, I rate this 4/5. The long parts without magic might be engaging, but it's not what I'm looking for in Harry Potter fanfiction. If you don't mind this, I can see the rating being higher.
     
  12. Lion

    Lion Banned DLP Supporter

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    Classic/5
     
  13. Johnnyseattle

    Johnnyseattle Death Eater DLP Supporter

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    This is the best example of an author knowing how to give the reader just enough information as to what's really going on in their story I've ever seen - Every chapter I've had a pretty solid idea of what's going on, that even if I'm proven wrong I can go back and still feel justified for thinking what I was. And what a mystery it is, too. The worldbuilding in this is amazing, and has the best development of a completely AU setting I can remember from any fic not named POTDK. Every character that has more than a few scenes is fleshed out extremely well, and Neville being the main perspective lends itself so well to the mystery that is the Harry Potter of this world - like everyone else, I was wary of this, but there was no reason to in the end. I've become somewhat of a stickler about not reading things that aren't already finished, but this is a rare entry into my "read instantly on update" list.

    Easy 5/5 for me.
     
  14. romeo

    romeo Squib

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    This is the best fanfic to come out of HP fandom in a long while. Amazing characters, I love how the world is slowly revealed and the plot is compelling. 5/5
     
  15. GlebsNewfoundland

    GlebsNewfoundland Muggle

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    How often is this updated?
     
  16. Bobika

    Bobika First Year

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    Not regularly, I'm afraid.
    I try to post a chapter a month but I don't always succeed. I had 10 chapters written when I started publishing so I managed to post those in quick succession but I have since slowed down.
    The next chapter is mostly written, just letting it sit for a while.
     
  17. Johnnyseattle

    Johnnyseattle Death Eater DLP Supporter

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    You cruel, cruel mistress.
     
  18. Bobika

    Bobika First Year

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    Oh, shush! It's only for your own good.
    And I am working on the following chapter in the meantime.
     
  19. Jarsha

    Jarsha Seventh Year

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    You are an evil tease with this slow release of information, but I'm loving every minute I've spent reading. It's damn solid writing and just the right amount of world building and character exploration each chapter to keep up on the edge begging for more. On merit alone it's easily in 4.5-5/5 territory - but due to tickling an itch for mystery I've had for weeks now, I would recommend a higher score if I could. Keep up the great work.
     
  20. GravityAP

    GravityAP Squib

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    This is easily the best story I've read in a while. It has extremely solid writing and an engaging plot. I'm really enjoying the world and learning about the alternate history as we traverse the story. I may or may not have just blasted through this in one sitting. 4.5 rounded up to a 5.
     
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