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Abandoned Black Ascension by omnis potens - M

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by Zevrillion, Nov 12, 2005.

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  1. Zevrillion

    Zevrillion Founder Retired Staff

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    Location:
    New Zealand
    Title: Black Ascension
    Author: omnis potens
    Rating: M
    Category: Action/Adventure/General
    Summary: Early in the summer of his fifth year, Harry decides that he wants to be in control and away from the Old Mans Manipulations. And why is he suddenly changing? Independant, dark but not evil, Grims and heritage. Not severitus. Eventual Violence.
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2644810/1/


    Like this story so far. Some clichés but not overdone, and a unique twist I haven’t read before; Sirius is Harry's father.
     
  2. Lord Ravenclaw

    Lord Ravenclaw System God Admin

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    Isn't bad, nice little twist, a few cliches though, but some cliches are just common sense.
     
  3. Lord Osiris

    Lord Osiris Auror

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    It was pretty good i must admit, the only thing that let me down was the changing of his name and the fact that the name he grew up with doesn't exist. I agree Lord Raverclaw got to be atleast a few cliches to get it going. Still going strong though!
     
  4. realmess

    realmess Slug Club Member

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    yeah, I've read it and agree- this story has potential. I liked the Black family background *snickers*[ the irony of it]. The vault/trunks thing might have been a bit overdone [if you've read more than one IndependentHarry], but digestible. Quite good for a first story.
     
  5. Xiph0

    Xiph0 Administrator Admin

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    Like it alot, going to keep reading ^_^
     
  6. MadEyes

    MadEyes Seventh Year

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    This is one of those I have under watch, waiting for the next chapter to be posted. It’s a slightly new concept, and the clichés used are not overwhelming enough to cause complaint. At the moment it does have prospective, but if the clichés used are anything to go by, I fear that we might see the downfall of this story when Harry has to go back to Hogwarts. Alas, I can hope that it won’t happen, but until I see some proof of in the development of the plot, then it is a fool’s hope.

    In any case, I don’t like the change of name either, the writer could have just as easily just added some more middle names and just changed the surname, ignoring his real name when needed and just using his other names when it suited him, but it came too quickly for my taste, even if it has to do with the plot. It just seamed too forced at the beginning, along with the feeling I get that it’s all a bit rushed and Harry is way to accepting.

    It does have an enormous amount of potential, even if all the Grim stuff is a bit overdone. If the author doesn’t clamp down on that soon, it will go a bit overboard with that plot gimmick, and that is without commenting on the lopsided smile, which seams to be a Black family trait. Still, it is quite interesting at the moment, and like I said, I hope that it gets better.

    Indeed, I could even admit to liking the thing.
     
  7. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    I tried this a while back and meh... not too bad, but nothing special either.

    Basic concept seems original enough on paper, but in reality you see that nothing has changed with that discovery. It's not like he can bound with his father, or gets some cool new powers or hates his father (like Severitus), etc. He already loved the guy, making him into father makes no diference... So, coz it makes no diference, the author starts doing ridiculous things with Grims, etc etc...

    In short, basic idea sucks however original it is. If he wanted to write something like that, he should have made Moony into father and have Harry get cool half-werewolf powers (power he knows not), etc...
     
  8. Cervus

    Cervus Raptured to Hell

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    Yeah, I read this and at first it seemed promising, but like IP I find that although the plot is original it is extremely flawed.

    Sirius being Harry's father changes nothing in reality, which is why the author has had to go down the slightly ridiculous route with the grims.

    The changing of name is something that bugs the shit out of me, not only in this story but in any story. I fail to see, in this story at least, what changing Harry's name has to do with furthering the plot. Perhaps I will check out the next chapter to be released, however, I am not holding out much hope for this one.

    Still, the author should at least be complemented for coming up with an original idea, especially in the clusterfucked world of HP fanfiction today.
     
  9. Hpsleuth11

    Hpsleuth11 Guest

    The new chapter is up and while I greatly enjoy this story i did not like at all the whole hedwig phoenix thing. I never understand why cant anyone kill that stupid owl. Everyone always has to revive it.
     
  10. ChuckDaTruck

    ChuckDaTruck Overlord

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    this story sucks now. I haven't read it since 2 chapters ago. I don't plan to read the new one. Change the Name? Why?

    And Hedwig the Phoenix, WHAT AN ORIGINAL IDEA!! (sarcastic FYI)
     
  11. Quack

    Quack Second Year

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    Eh... the cliches were at least tolerable, but Phoenix!Hedwig I can't stand... even if it isn't the typical white phoenix.
     
  12. Lord Ravenclaw

    Lord Ravenclaw System God Admin

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    Egh, this took a definite Power of Time downturn. Phoenix!Hedwig, ack!
     
  13. cmuylistoooo

    cmuylistoooo Fourth Year

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    it did take the wand and phoenix route ....
     
  14. MadEyes

    MadEyes Seventh Year

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    I just dropped it. Why the bloody hell do people describe every article of clothing with minute details?! Good grief, 1000 words about a cloak...give me some kitchenware so I can off myself. And yes, the wand and phoenix route. No thanks.

    I put up with enough last chapter with the complete stranger that is suddenly the Black family secret keeper and has been alive for longer the Nicky Flammel. Too many things are coincidences, and I don’t like that. *Stomps foot like a two year old*
     
  15. Thorn

    Thorn Professor

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    I actually thought it was all mostly reasonable...until Hedwig the Phoenix. No one can just leave Hedwig dead. I'll still follow the story but I'm not likin' it near as much.

    I honestly think the new wand is a reasonable cliche and that no author should really be put down for it. I do have a bit of a problem with all the House Vaults that seem to be floating around though.

    "Yes I have an amazing house, but if that fails I have a few nice BANK ACCOUNT VAULTS that can accomodate me nicely."
     
  16. Lord Ravenclaw

    Lord Ravenclaw System God Admin

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    It was okay until Hedwig. I also agree about the over-description...some description is good, but only so people can get an overall image, we don't need a story half-filled with detail.
     
  17. RagefulLlama

    RagefulLlama Seventh Year

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    Now that's not true what about all the Azkaban!Harry stories where they kill Hedwig to cause the traitor Harry immense emotional trauma of the wringy neckedness :p
     
  18. Lord Osiris

    Lord Osiris Auror

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    LOL thats true touche!

    It is a sad fact about that Hedwig bit :( but i suppose it might make up for it if Harry of whatever his new name is decides to get his dick wet with Narcissa, otherwise i do believe my resolve to read this will be lost. :cry:
     
  19. Blackstar

    Blackstar Second Year

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    Location:
    Brooklyn. NY
    He has a grim and he hides it:(


    He has an ENTIRE ALLEY under FIDELIUS.. i quit.. harry doesn't need an entire alley. At least hedwig isnt all bright white but i do wonder how shes gonna fly with a metal wing!
     
  20. MadEyes

    MadEyes Seventh Year

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    A metal wing?

    Wow, am I ever glad that i stopped reading then. Goodness knows I could have bashed my computer if I had reached that point of the chapter. A metal wing? Really! *shakes head at the very thought*
     
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