1. DLP Flash Christmas Competition + Writing Marathon 2024!

    Competition topic: Magical New Year!

    Marathon goal? Crank out words!

    Check the marathon thread or competition thread for details.

    Dismiss Notice
  2. Hi there, Guest

    Only registered users can really experience what DLP has to offer. Many forums are only accessible if you have an account. Why don't you register?
    Dismiss Notice
  3. Introducing for your Perusing Pleasure

    New Thread Thursday
    +
    Shit Post Sunday

    READ ME
    Dismiss Notice

Black Evil Rising by minniequill - M

Discussion in 'Trash Bin' started by Averis, Jun 22, 2007.

  1. Averis

    Averis Don of Delivery ~ Prestige ~

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2007
    Messages:
    187
    Location:
    North Carolina
    High Score:
    3,065
    Title: Black Evil Rising
    Author: minniequill
    Rating: M
    Genre: Horror/Romance
    DLP Category: Romance?
    Pairing: Bellatrix Lestrange/Rodolphus Lestrange
    Status: WIP
    Summary: BBRL. Follows the series of events in Bellatrix's seventh year at Hogwarts leading to her romance with Rodolphus Lestrange and her inauguration into Voldemort's ranks as one of his Inner Circle. Manipulative!Dumbledore. Powerful!Bellatrix

    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3600502/1/

    This caught my eye after glimpsing it in minniequill's profile. Updated 6-18, this story is unique and well-written enough to deserve a place in the Library. Basically the first chapter is Bellatrix/Cygnus Black (incest what?) and written in such a way that I couldn't tear myself away. It's different, and shows the Blacks as what a rich, Dark Pureblood family should be, at least in my mind.

    Definitely on the up and up, 4.5/5.
     
  2. thisperson

    thisperson Denarii Host DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 29, 2006
    Messages:
    710
    I liked it...

    I doubt the Andromeda was as clumsy as Tonks but seeing how we know so little of her from cannon, it's possible.

    Hopefull in the next chapter she'll explain how Bella got her darker tendancies.

    I fail to believe that a 17 year old would ever start licking blood at random in morbid fascination.

    And the love at first sight with Rodulphus seems a bit unbelieveable, lust sure, but love and already so sure of it...Right.

    4/5 Still too short, yet what has been written seems promising

    Seems like something Vash would write.
     
    Last edited: Jun 22, 2007
  3. Antivash

    Antivash Until we meet again... DLP Supporter Retired Staff

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2005
    Messages:
    6,957
    Location:
    Ghost Planet
    Fairly well done, I like it. Though the pairing is wrong in the above post. <_<

    4.5/5
     
  4. thisperson

    thisperson Denarii Host DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 29, 2006
    Messages:
    710
    I know it is her father who is with her, yet there is a small paragraph in the story where Rodolphus admires her and tells himself it is love...check the pensieve scene.

    Just seemed far fetched that he would admit love after seeing her for what...1/2 a minute... :\


    Edit: Wait nevermind...weren't even speaking to me...

    Err...

    *awkward*
     
  5. Skeletaure

    Skeletaure Magical Core Enthusiast ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Mar 5, 2006
    Messages:
    2,819
    Location:
    United Kingdom
    High Score:
    13,152
    Beautifully written with a dark atmosphere and interesting character interaction. Add on to that a nice chapter length and a promising future, and I'll say 4/5.

    However, I'll hold off on voting 'til there's more of it.

    Also, I recommend the Restricted Section.
     
  6. odainath

    odainath Squib

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2007
    Messages:
    16
    Location:
    Australia
    Okay, how long do you guys want the chapters to be? I wrote one where the chapter was 10000 words and it was considered too long. This one is about 4500 and apparently not long enough. Some sort of guidance in that area would be helpful.
    As a side note: this story is completely planned out. A miracle to any of those who know what I'm like. :D
     
  7. Nuhuh

    Nuhuh Dastardly Shadow Admin Retired Staff

    Joined:
    Nov 12, 2006
    Messages:
    2,080
    Location:
    USA
    Sometimes depends on speed of update, but Shezza and I use the rule of between 5000 and 10,000. Chapter has to be at least 5,000 words to be a complete chapter when either of us write.

    I personally never mind longer chapters as a reader and a lot of times you can't avoid them as a writer. But 5k-10k seems to be the sweet spot a lot of people agree on when we've talked about the same topic on the board or in irc.

    side note: 10k is not too much, if that's how much it takes to get across what you want in a particular chapter then 10k it is.
     
  8. odainath

    odainath Squib

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2007
    Messages:
    16
    Location:
    Australia
    It happens. It sounds horribly cliche but my boyfriend and I fell in love at first sight. I saw him roll his eyes at a lecturer and he saw me swear at a horse that had just kicked me (bloody hurt). Going on six months now and he had this annoying habit of taking me near jewellery shops to 'look at rings, not that it means anything, just hypothetically'.

    So yes, just thought I'd put my two cents worth in there.
     
  9. Dianeme

    Dianeme Guest

    Well, this is my favourite story of all time, though I will be a pain in the arse and ask a few questions that you haven't answered.

    Why does she lick blood? Has she done it before, or was it killing the woman that gave her the sudden urge?

    How long has she been sleeping with her father and who seduced who?

    Why does he call her 'Dark Angel'? Is it the obvious, that's she's beautiful and her last name is 'Black'; or is it something more.

    Get these blanks filled!
     
  10. Kyp's Avenger

    Kyp's Avenger Fourth Year

    Joined:
    Jul 31, 2006
    Messages:
    127
    Location:
    USA
    This is well-written and interesting. We'll see how it goes, but for now, 4/5.
     
  11. bornagainpenguin

    bornagainpenguin DLP Archivist

    Joined:
    Oct 27, 2005
    Messages:
    780
    Location:
    Illinois
    Gone. No copies known to exist.

    If anyone has this backed up please contact me so I can add it to the archives!

    --bornagainpenguin
     
  12. Scrittore

    Scrittore Groundskeeper

    Joined:
    Jul 30, 2009
    Messages:
    362
    Well it seems no copies have been found otherwise the link probably would of been revised. Bumped up for revision/deletion.

    Unless, someone does in fact have a link, if so please post.
     
  13. Inquisition

    Inquisition Canadian Ambassador to Japan DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Oct 9, 2006
    Messages:
    990
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Camelot
    Would have been revised.
     
Loading...