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Oneshot Butterbeer, Bollocks and a Ball by jaythekoala - T

Discussion in 'Romance' started by Genghiz Khan, Nov 8, 2020.

  1. Genghiz Khan

    Genghiz Khan Headmaster

    Joined:
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    Messages:
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    Location:
    Darujistan
    Title: Butterbeer, Bollocks and a Ball
    Author: jaythekoala
    Rating: Fiction T
    Genre: Romance/Humour
    Status: Completed
    Library Category: Humour
    Pairings: Harry Potter/Daphne Greengrass

    Summary: "She Transfigured Seamus' testicles into a pair of tweezers!" Through a series of unfortunate events and unwise decisions, Harry Potter ends up going to the Yule Ball with Daphne Greengrass. Perhaps things won't turn out so bad after all: when you've hit rock bottom, the only way to go is up, right? …Right? Not your usual Daphne fic. Warnings for language and underage drinking.

    Link: FFN

    This is a fairly funny oneshot featuring a normal Harry, a perverted Seamus, and a non-Ice Queen Daphne. And, well, Hermione. To give a brief description, Harry, after having learned that Cho, Hermione and Ginny are unavailable to take to the Yule Ball, decides to ask the next girl who comes through the portrait hole. Unfortunately, the next girl turns out to be Daphne Greengrass, who, surprisingly, says yes. Hilarity ensues.

    It's surprisingly entertaining. I found myself wishing there was a sequel. Daphne's definitely not typical fanon!Daphne, Harry's a typical 14-year old (both awkward and hormone-y), and Seamus is hilarious anytime he's mentioned. The fic touches on a bunch of tropes I haven't seen used much in this genre (and specifically not with this pairing) and it does it very well. I won't give the plot away: it's only 6000 words or so.

    No particular spelling/grammatical errors jumped out at me. It's short, sweet, and funny. 5/5 because it did what I wanted it to do: entertain the fuck out of me.

    The author, @James018 is also a DLP member but they've been inactive for a while.
     
    Last edited: Nov 8, 2020
  2. James018

    James018 Third Year

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    Hello! Got the e-mail notif.

    I'm glad you enjoyed it - it was written to entertain, rather than be a technically good story. That said, I tried to make sure there was nothing egregiously bad about it. It went through a surprising number of revisions before I finally posted it.

    Very happy to receive feedback for future work, even though I'm on hiatus from writing fan fiction right now. I expect to return at some point.
     
    Last edited: Nov 8, 2020
  3. haphnepls

    haphnepls Third Year

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    Nice find.

    I liked the most characters, and them actually acting like teenagers is a big plus. I sighed when Hermione exploded, "What's my problem?" but that's probably just the years of self-conditioning against her character. It was a short scene, and it didn't put me off the fic so no big harm there. All in all, I got my five minutes of entertainment which is clearly the point of this fic; I laughed, I smiled, and I found Seamus to be an unexpected but hilarious plus in all his aspects.

    Very good realization. It exceeded my expectations, and therefore, 4/5
     
  4. Barzûl

    Barzûl DA Member DLP Supporter DLP Silver Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2011
    Messages:
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    +1

    Cute fic.
    I've always liked these snippets of ordinary life at Hogwarts. Makes me wistful after those days past.
    A 14-year old Seamus going for a 12-year old Astoria is a bit too much for me. But I got past it by imagining a 13-year old with a 14-year old which could feasibly be the case.

    As the author said, not technically the most impressive of fics but I didn't mind at all.
    The dance scene in particular made me smile.

    4/5
     
  5. Republic

    Republic The Snow Queen ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Pretty solid for what it is. Enjoyed sorta reading sorta skimming it. Not much else to say tbh

    4/5
     
  6. Selethe

    Selethe normalphobe

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    I liked it. I felt strong second-hand embarrassment about 3/4ths of the way through so i skipped a bit with my hands over my eyes, but I liked it. 4/5
     
  7. jitenshasan

    jitenshasan First Year

    Joined:
    Oct 5, 2019
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    36
    I liked that Daphne wasn't either the ice queen or even simply the perfectly mannered pureblood young lady that fanfictions usually make her. I liked that teenagers read like teenagers (like Harry being glad that Ron has horrible dressrobes because it makes him feel better in comparison, petty but realistic) and that the dancing was a disaster (because yeah, one lesson with McGonagall, nope not going to be enough)

    I hated Hermione who feels she's entitled to have a say about everything in Harry's life (but I don't like her in general so...)

    Its not the kind of fic I'm going to read again but for a oneshot it was really good 4/5
     
  8. Snupps

    Snupps Fourth Year DLP Supporter

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    I enjoyed this quite a bit. The pace was great, dialogue felt real and everything was just organic.

    4.5/5 rounded to 5 from me.
     
    Last edited: Nov 15, 2020
  9. Averis

    Averis Don of Delivery ~ Prestige ~

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    Enjoyable. I smiled a few times. Not much to the plot, but I think it works better as something short and sweet. Reminds me of "We'll All Fall After the Yule Ball" (shameless plug) in a good way.

    4/5. Would recommend.
     
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