1. DLP Flash Christmas Competition + Writing Marathon 2024!

    Competition topic: Magical New Year!

    Marathon goal? Crank out words!

    Check the marathon thread or competition thread for details.

    Dismiss Notice
  2. Hi there, Guest

    Only registered users can really experience what DLP has to offer. Many forums are only accessible if you have an account. Why don't you register?
    Dismiss Notice
  3. Introducing for your Perusing Pleasure

    New Thread Thursday
    +
    Shit Post Sunday

    READ ME
    Dismiss Notice

WIP Centipede by Pangolin - NC17 - Worm/Tokyo Ghoul

Discussion in 'Worm' started by yak, Sep 28, 2016.

  1. yak

    yak Moderator DLP Supporter Retired Staff

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2007
    Messages:
    4,001
    Location:
    Australia
    Title: Centipede
    Author: Pangolin
    Rating: NC17
    Genre: Crossover, Horror, Crime
    Status: In-Progress
    Fandom: Worm/Tokyo Ghoul
    Pairings: None
    Summary: Taylor is stronger, faster, and tougher, but she also hungers for human flesh - not a trait of heroes. Ragged, unwashed, and desperately alone, she is summoned to meet with Lung.
    Link: https://forums.spacebattles.com/threads/centipede-worm-tokyo-ghoul.431353/

    Pangolin is no slouch as an author. I don't know where he came from (this is his only story I've found), but his pace is like lightning and his content is balanced and entertaining.

    I know nothing about Tokyo Ghoul except that it's about ghouls. In Tokyo. That's all that you need to know to get started.

    This is another "Taylor triggers with a different power", but several things set it apart.

    The author is bold in their plotting. Forget the stations of canon, this is going right off the rails with a lot of focus on the Merchants early on. Taylor has a nasty power, some societal naivety, and a desire to do good that means she doesn't play well with others. The ensuing conflicts are delicious delightful to watch unfold.

    The characterisation is good. Taylor has character growth and learns to compromise her hard-line stances where necessary. This might be as much to do with who she's eaten as her experiences, but it works.

    There are a handful of prominent OCs who I've grown to like. Trevor, Luke, Jay, maybe Claire. Trevor in particular is a perfect blend of Regent and Glenn Chambers. Decadent, self-interested, and a natural at communication and image.

    One of the problems I had with Worm is that Taylor never does anything gang related with the territory she held, like turn a profit, trade favours, collect protection, tax vice, nor did her outfit have any capacity to exist without leaching off of Coil's finite funds. This fic goes some way towards rectifying that oversight. Taylor has to run a large number of crews and keep money coming in to keep members loyal and so she has compromise on her schoolgirl ethics. It's a welcome change.

    The violence and horror is well played. I've enjoyed the fights and seeing Taylor learn from them. The gruesome nature of the fights and Taylor's eating habits are why I rated this NC17.

    There's a substantial amount already written; enough to tie you up for a couple of hours.

    This gets a 4/5 from me.
     
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2016
  2. Quiddity

    Quiddity Squib ~ Prestige ~

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2014
    Messages:
    7
    Location:
    New Zealand
    High Score:
    1100
    I'm hesitant to start Worm fics, as Spacebattles makes reading difficult and the quality is generally low, but this piques my interest. Do you mind if I ask what keeps it at 4/5?
     
  3. yak

    yak Moderator DLP Supporter Retired Staff

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2007
    Messages:
    4,001
    Location:
    Australia
    It has better plot and character arcs than the typical "Taylor gets a different power", has more words written, and has a refreshing take on the Merchants members, Sophia, and even Blasto.

    SB is dead easy to read on. Use threadmarks to move between chapters and use Watch Thread's "email me when OP posts" option for updates and author reveals. In some ways I prefer that system to ff.net. I read on my phone and tablet.
     
  4. T3t

    T3t Purple Beast of DLP ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2011
    Messages:
    176
    Location:
    Los Angeles
    High Score:
    3,164
    Bit of a rough start, but it does get much better. I'm glad you recommended it as I'd been avoiding it because I assumed there was significant crossover knowledge required.

    I particularly liked 1.6 and the stark contrast to all the other "DRUGS ARE TEH EVILZ" stories out there.

    4.5/5
     
  5. Quiddity

    Quiddity Squib ~ Prestige ~

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2014
    Messages:
    7
    Location:
    New Zealand
    High Score:
    1100
    Sorry, I meant what keeps it down at 4 rather than 5/5.

    I read fics downloaded on an offline kindle, primarily, so for me SB is difficult.
     
  6. Puzzled

    Puzzled High Inquisitor

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2014
    Messages:
    598
    There are a lot of things to like about this one, as Yak notes stations of canon are gone and the author is exploring a different part of canon than the usual. The fight scenes kind of irritate me though, and it's enough to put me off the rest. We've seen similarly OP Taylors before, this one is just forced to become a criminal by her powers. Highpowered crossovers can be fun for awhile, but sooner or later they run out of steam and this one has for me.

    It's still better than most things, but I don't think it's for me.
     
  7. Nuit

    Nuit Dark Lord

    Joined:
    Feb 14, 2010
    Messages:
    1,934
    Location:
    The Peach State
    The FanFicFare plugin for calibre can create epubs for story threads with threadmarks. Tested it out to make sure. Here's what's posted up to 3.8:

    https://www.dropbox.com/s/i39xxpiccukeuan/Centipede - Pangolin.epub?dl=0
     
  8. Nemrut

    Nemrut The Black Mage ~ Prestige ~

    Joined:
    Aug 9, 2009
    Messages:
    1,551
    Location:
    Department of Post-Mortem Communications
    High Score:
    2,101
    Hmm, I am a bit torn on this. On one hand, I agree on a lot of the things yak is praising in this fic. The fights are fun enough, the horror factor is cool, the take on Taylor and her development is interesting and it breathes life into a few minor characters (Sophia, Aegis, Blasto, you know who later on) and the Merchants as a whole.

    Highlight for me is the relationship with Sophia, which is just great and I absolutely loved every conversation they have had. Sophia in general is fantastic and may be the best take on her yet.

    However

    Convenient that the first merchant Taylor stumbled upon is so well read and articulate.* Pretty lucky to meet the lecturing scholar on the geopolitical gang situation of Brockton Bay of the Merchants. Honestly, that guy was bugging me something fierce.

    Story really grabbed my interest when Trevor died but the next chapter had Cape Danny and honestly,* fuck that. Danny doesn't feel like Danny at all and I don't know if that is because of Tokyo ghul shenanigans or what but I had really hoped he was dead or absent in this fic. Thankfully, he has a minimal appearance in this fic so far and I hope it stays that way. It is still shit though, really disappointing

    But yeah, it's one of the better alternatives power fics, it manages to avoid many of the bad fic pitfalls (but not all), its take on several minor characters is great and it's a fun read from start to finish.

    I do fear that the pitfalls it didn't manage to avoid will sink this story later on, especially with that one comment the author made later in the SB thread.

    Optimistic 4/5 for now.
     
  9. Omicron

    Omicron Squib

    Joined:
    May 23, 2016
    Messages:
    6
    High Score:
    0
    I'm not a huge fan of the opening, but that can be overlooked by the story's virtues. Genuinely engaging, at least compare to most of the alt-power Taylor fics out there, and so far it's managed to convey a dangerous world without going full grimderp.

    4/5 with potential to grow, to my eyes.
     
  10. Tutorial Boss

    Tutorial Boss Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2012
    Messages:
    247
    I can definitely back this. He builds each character as a difficult, challenging obstacle, an interesting creature, and prey all in one. It's well-paced, fast, fun and generally great all around.
     
  11. Abhorsen

    Abhorsen Squib

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2016
    Messages:
    8
    High Score:
    0
    One of the best parts about this fic is that it's not "Oh, look at all the problems I can solve with this power." Instead of erasing conflicts, the power is causing conflicts, e.g. forcing Taylor to eat people, forcing family unfriendliness. This, in-universe, is the point of powers, and out of universe, makes the story more interesting. Finally, I really like the use of Sophia. It's honestly one of my favorite depictions of her.