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WIP Champion by The Straight Elf - M - Pokemon

Discussion in 'Games' started by zUzaque, Aug 10, 2014.

  1. zUzaque

    zUzaque Seventh Year

    Joined:
    May 5, 2005
    Messages:
    246
    Location:
    Canada
    Title: Champion
    Author: The Straight Elf
    Rating: T
    Genre: Action/Adventure
    Status: WIP
    Fandom: Pokemon
    Pairings: NA
    Summary: In a world untamed by the hands of men, creatures with extraordinary powers roam the earth with impunity. Chaos reigns, battles rage, and humanity is engaged in a constant struggle for supremacy. But one man and his Rhydon will forge for themselves a greater destiny, the establishment of an age of peace for the harsh world in which they struggle. Prequel to Traveler.
    Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10607421/1/
    Link to Traveler: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8466693/1/Traveler

    Prequel to Traveler (Pokemon fic the author just finished). Only one chapter so far, but the author updates consistently and has a really good writing style.

    I'm not sure what the policy is for sequels/prequels of stories already in the library (regarding low word counts), but I wanted to put this up so anyone who followed traveler can jump on this.

    This fic follows the tale of the first Champion who we heard about through the lore of Traveler. The dialogue and mindsets of the characters are appropriately more archaic. It's still in world building mode so the action hasn't been too detailed. This is defiantly darker than Traveler, but not GrimDark. The battles have an extra dimension as the trainers fight along side their Pokemon.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 1, 2015
  2. A Lightning

    A Lightning Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Jun 18, 2012
    Messages:
    299
    Location:
    Los Angeles
    Why not wait for a few more chapters before making a recommendation thread? It looks good so far but I'm not ready to give it a score yet.
     
  3. TheWiseTomato

    TheWiseTomato Prestigious Tomato ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 11, 2009
    Messages:
    847
    Location:
    Australia.
    High Score:
    3694
    Because the author has history here, and based off that history, this story looks like it is shaping up to be of equal and better quality. This thread was also the first I'd seen of it.
     
  4. Otters

    Otters Groundskeeper ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2010
    Messages:
    311
    High Score:
    2005
    I was expecting more, given how popular Traveler is - although I've not been able to get into that myself. But this was resoundly mediocre. The plot, so far, is not engaging. The dialogue is actively bad, and the dialogue tags are consistently incorrect from a grammatical perspective.

    Because only one chapter is out so far, I won't rate it, but on the basis of what's out so far, I would give it a two out of five.

    It may be good by the standard of Pokemon fanfiction, but it's bad by any other. I'll try reading it again when a few chapters are out, but I don't have much hope. The grammatical errors are of a type which I find particularly annoying, so maybe other readers will enjoy this much more than I have.
     
  5. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2006
    Messages:
    1,359
    Traveler has been updated with a new chapter.

    Story Stats
    Chapters: 49
    Words: 1,173,297
    Updated: 2019-12-26 06:41:01 UTC
    Published: 2012-08-26 04:35:33 UTC
    Previously updated: 5 months ago

    Brought to you by Scryer story thread updates.
     
  6. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2006
    Messages:
    1,359
    Traveler has been updated with a new chapter.

    Story Stats
    Chapters: 50
    Words: 1,200,895
    Updated: 2020-02-15 21:35:58 UTC
    Published: 2012-08-26 04:35:33 UTC
    Previously updated: about 2 months ago

    Brought to you by Scryer story thread updates.
     
  7. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2006
    Messages:
    1,359
    Traveler has been updated with a new chapter.

    Story Stats
    Chapters: 51
    Words: 1,238,744
    Updated: 2020-04-02 03:32:54 UTC
    Published: 2012-08-26 04:35:33 UTC
    Previously updated: about 2 months ago

    Brought to you by Scryer story thread updates.
     
  8. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2006
    Messages:
    1,359
    Traveler has been updated with a new chapter.

    Story Stats
    Chapters: 52
    Words: 1,264,691
    Updated: 2020-04-29 21:57:49 UTC
    Published: 2012-08-26 04:35:33 UTC
    Previously updated: 28 days ago

    Brought to you by Scryer story thread updates.
     
  9. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2006
    Messages:
    1,359
    Traveler has been updated with a new chapter.

    Story Stats
    Chapters: 53
    Words: 1,285,959
    Updated: 2020-07-12 05:49:45 UTC
    Published: 2012-08-26 04:35:33 UTC
    Previously updated: 2 months ago

    Brought to you by Scryer story thread updates.
     
  10. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2006
    Messages:
    1,359
    Traveler has been updated with a new chapter.

    Story Stats
    Chapters: 54
    Words: 1,318,735
    Updated: 2020-08-27 03:15:39 UTC
    Published: 2012-08-26 04:35:33 UTC
    Previously updated: about 2 months ago

    Brought to you by Scryer story thread updates.
     
  11. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2006
    Messages:
    1,359
    Traveler has been updated with a new chapter.

    Story Stats
    Chapters: 55
    Words: 1,349,840
    Updated: 2020-10-09 00:26:21 UTC
    Published: 2012-08-26 04:35:33 UTC
    Previously updated: about 1 month ago

    Brought to you by Scryer story thread updates.
     
  12. MonkeyEpoxy

    MonkeyEpoxy Master of Death DLP Supporter

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Colorado
    This chapter wasn't as good as the one before it about the Lavender Tower, but that's a huge bar since that chapter was the best in about 20 chapters. I'm wondering if there will be any consequences for Oz's evolving before Surge really thought she was ready.

    I'm not entirely sure why Xion posts to this thread instead of the other one though.
     
  13. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2006
    Messages:
    1,359
    Traveler has been updated with a new chapter.

    Story Stats
    Chapters: 59
    Words: 1,502,260
    Updated: 2021-08-15 23:28:08 UTC
    Published: 2012-08-26 04:35:33 UTC
    Previously updated: 2 months ago

    Brought to you by Scryer story thread updates.
     
  14. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2006
    Messages:
    1,359
    Traveler has been updated with a new chapter.

    Story Stats
    Chapters: 60
    Words: 1,546,239
    Updated: 2021-10-21 00:28:06 UTC
    Published: 2012-08-26 04:35:33 UTC
    Previously updated: 2 months ago

    Brought to you by Scryer story thread updates.
     
  15. MonkeyEpoxy

    MonkeyEpoxy Master of Death DLP Supporter

    Joined:
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    Colorado
    Outstanding.

    I enjoyed the desert ghost hunt as well as the subjugation of Regirock's sentry Spiritomb. I kinda hope Ash chooses to train the Sandygast though.

    Assuming Ash is able to tame it for his team, he is at his third champion/mentor-second-pokemon teammate. Kingdra for Lance, Lairon (Aggron) for Steven, and now Spiritomb for Cynthia.

    The guide of the desert was a dope Flygon, and the Unovan-vs-world War veteran Krookodile was neat.
     
  16. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2006
    Messages:
    1,359
    Traveler has been updated with a new chapter.

    Story Stats
    Chapters: 61
    Words: 1,585,401
    Updated: 2022-01-23 05:32:49 UTC
    Published: 2012-08-26 04:35:33 UTC
    Previously updated: 3 months ago

    Brought to you by Scryer story thread updates.
     
  17. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2006
    Messages:
    1,359
    Traveler has been updated with a new chapter.

    Story Stats
    Chapters: 62
    Words: 1,612,464
    Updated: 2022-04-01 03:33:00 UTC
    Published: 2012-08-26 04:35:33 UTC
    Previously updated: 2 months ago

    Brought to you by Scryer story thread updates.
     
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