Ladies and Gentleman,

I am at a cross ways, one that shall lead to oblivion, and the other that may mean the grinding and painful continuation of existence, the choice is yours.

I wish to do a scene from Karrin Murphy's point of view in the next chapter. Would like to show you both Harrys and their interaction from how she sees them.

Issue is, she is not the main character, this would be an experiment really, and I don't want to suggest that she is now a third addition to the two main characters of my fic.

The scene is just flowing for me from her pov.

My question is, do you have opinions in general about this, from a writing/reading perspective? Or if you have a simple 'Yay' or 'Nay' for me doing Murphy POV for a part of the next chapter?

Any input is appreciated. Thanks

 

I think it would be pretty interesting to see what's going on from another perspective. It would offer insight into what other characters are thinking at the time. I don't see why one scene would cause a bad reaction from readers, and if it works out best for you, then go for it.

 

I wouldn't do more than a page or so from her point of view. Mostly, use it as an opportunity for a bit of a recap up to this point--from her view, of course--and, considering that she's obviously a bit of a love interest, use the opportunity to also give a vague description of her own personal feelings towards both Harry's.

Also, unless I'm mistaken, she's aware of her father's past affiliation with the Council. Maybe, you should explore her feelings of that as well?

 

Is this going to be a scene we see from Dresden's POV, then Potter's POV, and then also, Karrin's? Or just once through from Karrin's POV?

If it's just once through from Karrin's, I could see justification to separating it as it's own chapter as a sort of "interlude" as opposed to a normal 'chapter.'

But if it's another repetitive POV switch, I'm not sure. It seems too random for my tastes to suddenly introduce a 3rd character working from first person POV. I'd almost rather see everyone and their mother getting a shot at a scene in first person, or just stick to Harry and Harry.

Then again, I'm still iffy on the whole two different Harry's doing first person, so take my opinion with a grain of salt.

It's simply going to be a judgment call on whether you feel it's worth it for the fic. But if it were me, I think I'd cut the scene or change the fic to not need it.

 

Normally I'd say it's your story, but you want a real answer, so I'll say this. Karin's viewpoint, as a still somewhat confused perspective, would be excellent as a statement as to how the interaction between Harry and Dresden looks to a party with a lack of general knowledge of the situation. Frankly, I find you choice of several persons to tell the story thrilling, as it adds all sorts of dimensions, and allows for Harry to look far more terrifying to the Dresdenverse. The upshot? Do it.

 

A story in various points of view is always hard to pull off, and you're doing a pretty good job at it. I have a story like that (though it's not for DLP); but I was careful to keep one main point of view. It's important in order to keep the story coherent, in my opinion. In Demon's Feign, Merlin's Pain you have two main perspectives and you need to keep it at that.

If the scene flows instinctively from Murphy's point of view, it would be a pity not to include it. But for the coherence of the story, style-wise, I'd recommend to keep it brief (as Sov said) and most importantly to separate it from the rest of the text -- like a "parenthesis".

Murphy's point of view could be included in a normal chapter (at the beginning or at the end) but in italics, so as to show it is something exceptional, a small parenthesis in the story. Or, as nonjon said, as an interlude. Those are two ways to mark the difference between this occasional perspective and the two main points of view. But the interlude might give it more importance than it is good for a secondary point of view.

 

No, you don't need to further separate her perspective. You're already doing that. And, her overall tone should be significantly different from the other two so that it will act more as an outside perspective.

 

Thanks for all the comments everyone, it helped to see some of the pros and cons you've put out.

I still wish to do a Murphy scene, but I may do that as an addition, or an OMAKE, companion piece. Just for my entertainment and others who are interested. I am writing the chapter now, if I absolutely can't make it work without her scene then I will put that in.

I honestly can't give her an entire chapter, just wanted to show one scene through her eyes. So lets see how this comes out.

Appreciate all the thoughts.