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WIP Never Die Twice by Void Herald - M - Original Fiction

Discussion in 'Original Fiction' started by Dryops, Jun 19, 2020.

  1. Dryops

    Dryops Second Year DLP Supporter

    May 29, 2007
    United States
    Title: Never Die Twice
    Author: Void Herald
    Rating: M / T?
    Genre: Fantasy, Adventure, LitRPG
    Fandom: Original Universe
    Pairings: N/A
    Summary: Walter Tye is the best friend any adventurer needs. He is the smiling shopkeeper next to your local dungeon, the one who sells you these cheap healing potions. When you need information about a monster, Tye always knows. He wants to help; you can trust him. He is also the undead necromancer ruling said dungeon, getting paid to solve problems that he caused in the first place. But don't tell anyone that...

    Link: Royal Road

    Never Die Twice is one of those stories that gripped me from the start, and made it impossible to put down. I loved the premise, which turned the trope of the dungeon master on its head. As we read through the story, we see more of Tye's motivations as well, and it's more than the usual "be evil and be rich" that is expected of such villains.

    The story is well-written, and I enjoy the sense of humor the author conveys. (The author also wrote Vainqueur the Dragon, so the humor is similar in tone). The characters are more complex than they first appear, and the author weaves glimpses of Tye's past in with the present. Never Die Twice is a fairly recent RR addition.

    Since it was first published a little under two months ago, 14 chapters have been posted, with the last just 6 days ago. This is one of my favorites from Royal Road so far, and I'd rate it a solid 4 / 5, with the 4 only held back by the fact that I want to reserve judgement until I see more of where the story goes.
  2. Sauce Bauss

    Sauce Bauss Second Year ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Apr 4, 2008
    High Score:
    Read this on @Dryops recommendation, and it was solid enough. Better than most of the dregs of the written word that is RoyalRoad.

    I enjoy the characters a fair bit and the protagonist, while a villain, is eminently sympathetic in his aims. The prose is a bit bare-bones and formulaic at times, but not enough to be a large detriment.

    Like Dryops, I read it in a single session and I was mildly disappointed that it didn't have more written. That said, neither do I expect it to become one of the greats that I'll recommend or reference for a long time either.

    A solid 3/5, with the potential for a 4 I think. I'll not actively follow for updates, but when reminded I'll read everything that's been written so take that as you will.
  3. Mutton

    Mutton Order Member

    Feb 20, 2011
    It's fun in a "protagonist's successes are the cause of their problems" way, I'm just worried that's the kind of gag that will quickly run out of steam. Very enjoyable for the time being though, 4/5.
  4. valrie

    valrie Fifth Year

    Jan 1, 2018
    Okay, I went into this expecting something that's alright at best but I actually read it in one go even though it's getting pretty late here.

    It's not a grand masterpiece but it's well-written and fun. Doesn't take itself too seriously and made me laugh a few times.

    The main character is surprisingly interesting and I'm already looking forward to the next chapter.

    4/5 from me.
  5. Barzûl

    Barzûl Seventh Year DLP Supporter

    Dec 31, 2011
    Intriguing story with likable characters so far.
    I really enjoy the main character and his suffering from succes.

    For now, I readily await updates but how the story expands upon its initial boundaries is going to make or break it.

  6. mangaguy

    mangaguy Fifth Year

    Jan 3, 2010
    I like this, but I honestly think it's a little early to recommend this.
    Basically, the first major arc has ended and stuff is happening from there.

    Main character is enjoyable so far and the Nordic mythology based world is a little ehhh..., but has not gotten too grating yet.

    4/5 for what is there.
  7. Jack-O

    Jack-O Second Year

    Dec 7, 2008
    This is definitely above the level of most stuff I've read off of Royal Road, though that's not saying much.

    It's got a solid MC with a decent cast of memorable supporting characters, despite the relatively uninspired setting. I liked the general tone and the pacing was good, too.

    Personally this type of plot can only go so far before it gets stale, so hopefully the author doesn't bite off more than he can chew. There's only one major arc completed, so it remains to be seen whether or not the author can keep the momentum going.

    It looks like a confrontation with
    one of Tye's old necromancing buddies
    is coming up soon, so for me it's worth following at least until the end of this next arc.

    4/5 so far, but it could go either way depending on what happens next.
  8. thattin

    thattin Second Year

    Feb 20, 2013
    This is pretty good. Not perfect, but it does some things very well and overall I'd say I like this more than his other work.

    The good
    -The characters are universally well done and likeable. Walter is a near perfect villain protagonist. He has sympathetic goals whilst it remaining obvious why people would logically oppose them, with him doing horrible things to achieve said goals. The side characters are all interesting and I'm invested in nearly all of them.
    -Arc 1 is really well paced. I didn't notice it drag at all and I liked it all. It would've been incredibly easy for it to fall into idle slice of life stuff but it handled it really well.
    -The plot and the mystery behind the undercity are both well done. Everyone involved feels smart and not sidelined to make things fit.

    The take-it-or-leave-it.
    -The world is a bit bland? I like the blending of Arthurian and Nordic mythos but I could see why you wouldn't.
    -There's very little focus on slice of life. I really like the interactions between the characters but they're pretty sparse. I think it probably benefits the story as a whole to not get bogged down in them but I wouldn't have minded seeing a bit more of their day to day like.
    -The summary is really misleading. I assumed it'd be more focused on his shop and it's really not. I'd still like to read the story given in the blurb, but that's only tangentially this.
    -The game system feels superfluous. I'm a fan of litrpg generally, but it's not adding anything to this story. It's just sort of there as a token nod to fans of that genre and I think it could be better without it.

    The Bad
    -The pacing seems to have hit a wall in act two. It's enjoyable still but it feels drawn out. The latest chapter (24) was particularly bad being 90% flashback. It was interesting to read, but I'm not sure it added much to the story. A few chapters in the last few have been like that and it feels like it's spinning it's wheels a bit.

    So generally I think the first part of the story is excellent 5/5. It's dropped down a bit after that but I still think it's worthy of a rounded 5/5 although if I really hate how it goes I'd lower it.
  9. Barzûl

    Barzûl Seventh Year DLP Supporter

    Dec 31, 2011
    I just thought I'd give an update.
    As of today, the story is finished.

    I won't lie, it felt like the pacing went from 0-100 in 2 chapters.
    Nonetheless the fic is completed and I rather liked it. It's not as satisfying as I hoped but it's adequate.
    I'll stick to my original rating of 4/5.