1. Q3 - 2021 - Competition Ending Soon!
    topic - AFTERMATH
    CLICK HERE!
    NEW DEADLINE - October 17th! Yup, it’s an extension!
    Dismiss Notice
  2. Hi there, Guest

    Only registered users can really experience what DLP has to offer. Many forums are only accessible if you have an account. Why don't you register?
    Dismiss Notice
  3. DLP Writing Competition - Voting !!
    FLASH FIC FINALISTS! Voting via poll - leave a simple one paragraph review/comment on each story!
    Which two stories did you think were the best?
    Click here to participate!
    Dismiss Notice
  4. Introducing for your Perusing Pleasure

    New Thread Thursday
    +
    Shit Post Sunday

    READ ME
    Dismiss Notice

WIP Ouroboros by Metalomagnetic - M

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by briannakoslov, Dec 7, 2020.

  1. briannakoslov

    briannakoslov Squib

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2016
    Messages:
    16
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    London
    High Score:
    0
    Title: Ouroboros
    Author: Metalomagnetic
    Rating: M
    Genre: Drama
    Status: In Progress
    Pairings: Tom Riddle/Tom Riddle, Tom Riddle/Walburga Black
    Summary: A strange man adopts Tom Riddle and it is not his father, as Tom desperately wants to believe. Stranded in the past, Voldemort once again comes to the conclusion he's the only one he truly needs.

    https://archiveofourown.org/works/24476011/chapters/59074657

    The story is written from Tom's point of view, as he gets adopted from the orphanage.
    The grammar and spelling are solid (very minor mistakes). Voldemort is kept in character, as is Tom and Dumbledore.

    Besides the unique concept ( I am yet to read another Voldemort raises himself story) I like that the author describes both WW2 and the Rise of Grindelwald, in the background, without burdening the story, just enough casual references in dialog to let the reader know what is going on.
    It is a dark story, that keeps Tom as the creepy, smart child that he was, without overdoing it in any way. So far there had been no attempt for any redemption for Voldemort, nor do I see one coming.
    Chapters are updated frequently and the author responds in the comment, is open to criticism and very polite, which is always a plus.

    The story was good enough for me to post on here, even if I have been only a lurker on the forum, for many years. I saw someone encouraging the author to post the story on this forum and she gave permission but said she doesn't know how to do it herself.

    I would give it a a rating of 4.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 14, 2021
  2. Majube

    Majube Order Member

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2016
    Messages:
    829
    Location:
    Canada
    High Score:
    0
    This fic is really interesting and hilarious (it's a serious fic I just find it hilarious at times). This Voldemort is a tiny bit OoC imo just because he's a bit saner then canon but then again its not like he's raising some normal child he's raising himself so of course he doesn't just crucio him all the time like shitty fics have him do with Harry for instance. This fic has such a damn unique concept, I've seen fics where Hagrid of all people raises Tom before, never have I seen a Voldemort raises himself, it's amazing just for that lol.

    I really do enjoy Tom's characterization,
    it's so perfect how slow the character development was, at first I started off thinking how great his child thoughts were and how it was interesting to be able to empathize with him even though he was a creepy but regular kid, the priest thing took me for a loop but besides that the gradual change into him being such a regular teen instead of full psychopath was amazing. Now the regular way teen Tom Riddle is written in normal fics is ruined for me because while he'd be a lot colder then this one he's not as crazy at that age as he's usually portrayed. And of course in fics where someone travels back in time and raises Tom after he's like 8 or something usually have him become some sickeningly sweet nice kid.

    Not completely caught up, still around halfway through but I agree it's a 4/5.
     
  3. soczab

    soczab Professor

    Joined:
    Feb 1, 2016
    Messages:
    406
    High Score:
    0
    out of curiosity is this tom riddle/tom riddle as in like just a platonic relationship or is in like voldemort is having sex with his underage adopted son who is also himself?

    I ask cause the general summary you posted sounds like my sort of story and doesnt mention any relationship.. but the / usually indicates something romantic or sexual on archive of our own. And incest (or self incest? whatever) is a bit too meh for me. Not that it may bother others
     
  4. Niez

    Niez Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2018
    Messages:
    204
    Location:
    Behind you
    The latter I'm afraid. I was also curious and checked the comments for the last chapter and yeah. Don't know what I was expecting really, but Voldemort self-cest with his underage adopted son is very much on the cards, or so the author claims. 'Not for everyone' indeed. Do not judge poor majube too harshly though, I hear finals are having a very adverse effect on her mental health.
     
  5. briannakoslov

    briannakoslov Squib

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2016
    Messages:
    16
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    London
    High Score:
    0
    As of now (15 chapters) there is no slash. So far the only sexual relationship has been between Tom/Walburga.
     
  6. Nexis

    Nexis Third Year

    Joined:
    May 20, 2017
    Messages:
    103
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Poland
    High Score:
    0
    Ugh, I had no idea this story will feature them having sex, why was I so naive. I guess I should've expected that. I read 7 chapters so far and enjoyed the story mostly. Nothing weird has happened yet, so I can happily stop reading now and forget that this story has more chapters. It's really a shame, the writing is solid, just a few typos here and there. It's also a hurt/comfort story so not everybody's cup of tea. I liked Dumbledore in this, the story has potential to be good, I just wish it wasn't so focused on the hurt/comfort aspect (and the sexual aspect in the future, apparently). Still, I guess the story is solid, I'm just not the right target. So, if someone isn't bothered by the self-cest thing, they would probably enjoy this. So I'll give this a 3/5, it gave me an hour of entertainment.
     
  7. briannakoslov

    briannakoslov Squib

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2016
    Messages:
    16
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    London
    High Score:
    0
    So far there had been no self-cest or slash. I tagged it how the author did. I'm sorry if it's against the rules here, I never posted anything so please tell me if slash is not allowed and I will delete it.
    I just thought it is a very well written story, with solid characters and that people might enjoy it. It is not something you see often, Voldemort raising himself or Voldemort against Grindelwald.
     
  8. Nexis

    Nexis Third Year

    Joined:
    May 20, 2017
    Messages:
    103
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Poland
    High Score:
    0
    @briannakoslov

    No need to delete anything, the story seems to be solid and is an enjoyable read. People might dislike/not read it mostly for the self-cest which is only fair as it's not everyone's thing. But the worst that can happen is people giving the story low scores, no need to worry, and I personally thank you for putting this story here as it gave me an hour or so of solid entertainment.
     
  9. briannakoslov

    briannakoslov Squib

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2016
    Messages:
    16
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    London
    High Score:
    0
     
  10. soczab

    soczab Professor

    Joined:
    Feb 1, 2016
    Messages:
    406
    High Score:
    0
    No worries not against the rules, just wanted to clarify. Personally I dont care if there is slash or het in the story... I prefer my stories to not be romance or pair cetric (no matter who it is) but imo the quality of the story matters normally, not the pairing normally.

    But tbh true love between a father and his underage son is probably too far for me (if thats where its going) even if the story is well written hence wanting to clarify. Again not to say you can't post it... but yeah. The whole underage incest thing is just a bit too much for me, especially if its meant to be like some consensual 'true love' thingy as opposed to say like trauma to be overcome (which can also be cliche but is less.. I dont know... weird of the author?)

    Sounds like the story hasnt gone there with that relationship yet though. So ill probably keep half an eye on it and see how it develops before diving in.
     
    Last edited: Dec 8, 2020
  11. briannakoslov

    briannakoslov Squib

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2016
    Messages:
    16
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    London
    High Score:
    0
    It isn't focused at all on the pairing (the slash one isn't there yet and the walburga one is barely there). From what the Author said in the comments, she made it clear it will not be underage, nor that there will be love, because Voldemort can't feel love, nor care about sex, generally, but that Tom is very prone to obsession and he's developing one. It is most all about trauma, with him. But yes, I'm not too keen about the pairing either, I wish it wouldn't happen at all, but she wrote the boys so well so far that I will keep reading just for that and the various plots going on, especially with Dumbledore and Grindelwald.
     
  12. Majube

    Majube Order Member

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2016
    Messages:
    829
    Location:
    Canada
    High Score:
    0
    I don't read tags, I think I did briefly see it though and thought it was the platonic type of tag. Unfortunate but now I'm too invested in it to abandon it just because there's some potential for an odd relationship. I mean if its self-cest does it really qualify? No, it doesn't ;)
     
  13. Majube

    Majube Order Member

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2016
    Messages:
    829
    Location:
    Canada
    High Score:
    0
    But to be real, I have no idea how the hell they'd go through with making that the relationship, took a look at the authors booktags an lmao, explains their taste.
    It's definite bullshit looking back at the recent chapters I read (caught up completely shortly after my review) and in retrospect there was a few brief pre-slash flag with Tom being slightly obsessive/possessive but I didn't really catch on but now I realise they were trying to handwave through Tom that it's not and never really was a proper father/son relationship which is complete bullshit, and the only inclination we have for Voldemort leaning that way is that he really likes how Tom is literally himself and he never harms him but besides that, there's no mention at all or any hint of pre-slash vibes really from Voldemort besides that he's a narcissist.

    I would still say read up to Chap 15 and until whatever slash comes, it's like that fic the neverending road, people were turned off by the fem!Harry/Snape pairing tag that never even happened in the first book, or how Saving Connor series was mostly pre-slash. If it's not your thing irregardless then that's okay but if you're on the fence this is a great Tom Riddle pov fic. Personally, I do hope the author sees sense and either doesn't go through with it or only briefly and not as a positive thing, like jeez I wish this fic was gen now.
     
  14. briannakoslov

    briannakoslov Squib

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2016
    Messages:
    16
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    London
    High Score:
    0
    @Majube
    I also hope the author won't go through with it. I think if they do, it will not be anything "lovey-dovey" or positive in any way. Like you, from what I read, I don't see any sign from Voldemort being into this. It seems entirely one sided to me.
     
  15. haphnepls

    haphnepls DA Member

    Joined:
    Mar 26, 2019
    Messages:
    166
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Croatia
    It's a decent read, with only a few spelling mistakes that seem to be typos. At first, I thought the fic would have pacing problems with how much the author seemed to focus on the early stages of Tom/Marvolo rather toxic relationship, but after a few chapters, when we reach Hogwarts, it quickly picks up. I like the fact that the author tries to keep most characters canonish, and the deviations caused by Tom's earlier meeting with magic are believable, but still in character.

    The negatives so far, are that there are a lot of fillers while in Hogwarts, where the author seems to want to rush through his school years in order to start their main plot, with only hints and backstories doing so so far. Grindelwald has a strong side-plot vibe to me, and I feel like the real deal is about to start only when he is dealt with (if it happens at all). If I got it wrong, then I've no idea where Voldemort is heading at all, and even more of a plot is there just to fill the time that they have to go over, in order to place Tom where they want him. It doesn't mean that story is bad (because it isn't), but I'd thought that after 80k words, the focus of the story would be clearer to a reader. We'll see.

    Concerning pairing and relationships, I feel like they're completely unnecessary at this point. It will just make the plot stray even more from what it hopes to accomplish, and I'd like it to stay exactly where it is: Tom having his flings or whatever, and Marvolo being Marvolo, with zero needs towards any sort of relationship other than this weirdness he has going with his son. I'll even go so far and say if author persists with it and includes the pairing he hinted at, it will ruin the whole story.

    So for the first 15 chapters, I'd tentatively agree with 4/5, but I can't make myself press those stars just yet.
     
  16. PoshMafia

    PoshMafia First Year

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2018
    Messages:
    21
    Gender:
    Male
    It is literally labelled as m/m like what? Of course the T/V is literal.

    Anyway 1/5. That shit is just 100% disgusting.
     
  17. briannakoslov

    briannakoslov Squib

    Joined:
    Aug 3, 2016
    Messages:
    16
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    London
    High Score:
    0
    Did you read it?
     
  18. Ched

    Ched Da Trek Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐⭐

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2009
    Messages:
    8,184
    Location:
    The South
    Don't rate the thread if you aren't going to read a couple chapters of it. "Ew it's gay 1/5" is zero effort, so fuck off with that.

    Edit: I've been informed via Discord that your 'disgusting' comment was likely in regards to the, uh, age-gap on display. I agree that adult!LV having sex with his underaged self whom he has raised as a son is indeed disgusting.

    You still need to read the story if you're going to rate the thread though. It's quite possible to despise the content/concept of a well written story. For example - I hate reading about adults having sex with underage children as it is indeed disgusting, but as I have zero intention of reading this story I shall not rate it.

    Edit2: Apparently it's more complicated than that. But fuck it. I don't want to read it to find out in which way this could be more complicated. There might not be any sex just 'vibes' but whatever.

    Read some if you're going to rate, ffs. /done
     
    Last edited: Apr 25, 2021