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WIP The Worst Muggles Imaginable by Ephemeral3501-M

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by disposablehead, Oct 30, 2011.

  1. disposablehead

    disposablehead Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2011
    Messages:
    245
    Title: The Worst Muggles Imaginable
    Author: Ephemeral3501
    Rating: M
    Genre: Humor/Horror
    Status: WIP
    Summary: The Dursleys truly are the worst muggles imaginable.
    Link: Link!

    Vernon Dursley, the bastard offspring of David Berkowitz, is informed by his dog Ripper that the spawn of Satan was just dropped off at his front door. Crack ensues.

    It retreads a lot of ground, but Harry makes awfully adorable satanist. And who couldn't use more crack in their lives?
     
  2. CrackedMind

    CrackedMind Headmaster

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    I saw the miss spelled Mcgonagall, and hit the big red x. Tried to read it again, and I'm sort of happy I did. The goodnight moon parody made this worthwhile. It's not great, but it does give some simple laughs .



    2/5
     
  3. Otters

    Otters Seventh Year ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2010
    Messages:
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    High Score:
    2005
    This is poorly (but not with huge errors, just a lack of style or anything good) written, but has a fair few silly laughs, and is an easy read. I'd rate this lowly, but I'm continuing to read with a smile on my face, so I'll give it a 3/5.

    It's good to see fics which don't take themselves too seriously every now and then, even though they're often lower in quality.
     
  4. Dark Minion

    Dark Minion Bright Henchman DLP Supporter Retired Staff

    Joined:
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    2,231
    It has some good moments and even adorable scenes
    "Sweet, I got Agrippa!", Harry clutched the chocolate frog card in triumph. "Ron said he'd sell his soul for this card."

    Tiny feet pattered down the hall way heading towards the dungeons, towards Snape's office.

    "Professor Snipe! I need your help!"

    But the story lacks exceeding scenes to compensate for its downsides, i.e.
    longwinded internal monologues, the attempts at coyping the (often horrid) style of Rorschach with listing very short scenes, the forced humour.

    3/5 because I am in a good mood.
     
    Last edited: Oct 30, 2011
  5. bob99

    bob99 High Inquisitor

    Joined:
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    533
    I see this working as a long oneshot, not an actual story. But it made me laugh.
    3/5
     
  6. Ched

    Ched Da Trek Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐⭐

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    I laughed in one or two places, but I agree with the other reviewers that it's not Library worthy.

    2.5/5 rounded up to 3/5 for a spot in the Bin at best.
     
  7. Captain Trips

    Captain Trips High Inquisitor

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    Location:
    Sweden
    It's worth a few cheap laughs, 2/5 from me.
     
  8. Nauro

    Nauro Headmaster

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    Not very good.

    Laughed at the few funnier places, though.
    There definitely are worse things to read.
    looks like 2.5/5, gave it a 3 because of the Hufflepuff propaganda.
    Perhaps i am too generous...

    Nauro.
     
  9. Ched

    Ched Da Trek Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐⭐

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    Yeah, rounding up to 3/5 for this quality is pretty generous, I only do so for the originality. That said though it might be better suited for Almost Recommended, laughs or no. Hard to say.
     
  10. Desmir

    Desmir Squib

    Joined:
    May 24, 2009
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    17
    Perhaps its just me... but I LAUGHED SO HARD at this part, in fact recalling it still makes me laugh, picturing them having this serious conversation.

    Frikin hilarious!

    3/5 cause i think its a crack fic that should be in our library, its no great work or art but it didnt set out to be. Its achieved its goals of being funny pretty well

    "Headmaster, summat's been killing the unicorns." (Hagrid)
    "Send a bunch of firsties to go check it out." (Albus)
    "You're a good man, Dumbledore, don't let anyone tell ya different." (Hagrid)
     
  11. Shezza

    Shezza Renegade 4 Life DLP Supporter

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    Perhaps it's just me...but this isn't funny.

    1/5
     
  12. Tyler

    Tyler First Year

    Joined:
    May 7, 2010
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    36
    I found a couple of things pretty funny, though it seems like the author is trying a little too hard and it shows in his writing.

    2/5
     
  13. edd

    edd Muggle

    Joined:
    Dec 22, 2010
    Messages:
    3
    Worst Muggles Imaginable

    I found this to be funny, but strange also sad. I gave it 3/5.
     
  14. shakeval

    shakeval Squib

    Joined:
    Aug 17, 2007
    Messages:
    8
    4/5

    chapter 9 was great, some great laughs in that

    especially this bit

    Ragnok stared at the little human in front of him. "Mr. Potter. Goblins do not simply 'fall' out of mining carts."
    "Well, maybe he's not much of a goblin then."
    He had to admit to himself, that the child had a point. In his day, anyone foolish enough to turn their back to a hell hound got what he deserved. But on the other hand, it wouldn't do to have wizards pushing goblins out of carts.
    "Mr. Potter, the surveillance footage clearly shows you pushing Griphook out of the cart. Your voice can clearly be heard laughing at him."
    "Oh... Well, is it against the rules or something? I don't remember reading anything about NOT pushing goblins out of carts in your bank brochure."
    Technically this was true. Until now the bank had never thought to include the "Do not push your goblin out of the cart" policy. Nor had thought to include the "Do not steal someone else's vault numbers" policy.

    EDIT by Minion: Please use spoiler tags.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 22, 2011
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