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Complete VINCET by nos tres reges - T

Discussion in 'General Fics' started by Taure, Apr 18, 2009.

  1. Taure

    Taure Magical Core Enthusiast ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Title: VINCET
    Author: nos tres reges
    Rating: T
    Genre: Adventure
    DLP Category: Independent Harry

    Pairing: None yet
    Chapters: 8
    Words: 78,821
    Updated: July 28, 2009
    Published: March 17, 2009
    Status: Complete

    Summary: It started with a desire to protect himself from his hateful relatives. It revolved around the Trace. The end was less definite; what was clear from the beginning, though--he would conquer. No slash.
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4930996/1/VINCET

    An AU tale starting from 1st year (currently 5 chapters in and at 1st year Christmas hols). While the essential plot (i.e. Philosopher's Stone) appears to be the same, it's extremely different to canon. The story has a slightly humourous tone and a witty, intelligent Harry (too witty for an 11 year old, really) who's good at magic. Strong characterisation all round. Perfect spelling and grammar. Good pacing.

    The worst part about the story is the start: the first few paragraphs don't exactly hook the reader. Nevertheless, before the end of chapter one we've dived in head first - no pussy footing around in Diagon Alley. It's starts on September 1st.

    5/5


    The authors posted a sequel:

    Title: VULTUS SERPENTIS
    Rating: T
    Genre: Adventure
    Chapters: 7
    Words: 67,564
    Updated: August 22, 2012
    Published: October 12, 2009
    Status: Complete
    Summary: VINCET 2: Every so often, a momentous individual makes their way through the world, making ripples in their path. Dumbledore and Voldemort were two such men, sending waves crashing, obliterating all else, and Harry grows sick of wearing a life preserver.
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5438875/1/VULTUS-SERPENTIS




    Checked by Minion, September 17, 2014
    The series isn't available on public archives anymore. I attached a zip-file with both stories.
     

    Attached Files:

    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 17, 2014
  2. Palver

    Palver High Inquisitor

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    I have a very high hopes for this fic.

    5/5 for now.
     
  3. Howdy

    Howdy Dark Lord

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    You know, I haven't even finished reading the first chapter but I was just thinking to myself today - does a metamorph!Harry story exist where he isn't granted that fucking amazing power just so that he can strike up a relationship with Tonks?

    I haven't found one.

    Hopefully this story delivers on that front, at the least.
     
  4. Kensington

    Kensington Denarii Host DLP Supporter

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    But I wuv my Honks....

    So far this is pretty damn good. The pacing is great, providing for interesting scenes at a fast clip. I was pleasantly surprised by the distrust Hermione had for authority in this. I don't see that very often in first year fanfics, which makes for a nice change. As noted, the characterization is overall damn good.

    I have two concerns. The first is Dumbledore. To me he virtually screams "Creepy man who wants bad things to happen to Harry." Which may be the intent of the author, since this Harry is definitely less trustworthy of adults and more observant. I'm just a little put off by how transparent Dumbledore is characterized. Secondly, while this could be explained by the apparent ritual abuse at the Dursleys, the uber-observant/insightful Harry comes off as slightly unrealistic.


    4/5 for now. Rating subject to change with future installments.
     
    Last edited: Apr 18, 2009
  5. azrael

    azrael Professor

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    I think this story is pretty good, but so far I wouldn't go so far as to call it great. Right now, it has potential, but it has problems too, which have already been pointed out. I'll agree with Kens and give it 4/5
     
  6. Vir

    Vir Centauri Ambassador ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    It has great potential but that in and of itself does not a great fic make. More will be needed to judge properly.
     
  7. Andro

    Andro Master of Death DLP Supporter

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    I really like it. This reminds me of the Jaded Series, except Harry toughens up reasonably under the Dursleys, and is not turned into an omniscient chessmaster single-handedly sweeping the Wizengamot. The Dursleys in this story are used graciously, not exploited as an excuse to turn Harry into a super mature badass.

    The writing style is very consistent for three writers, unlike the DLP chain story thing where the different writers made it jarring whenever they switched.

    Against its favor, the exaggerated Dursley abuse is just not acceptable even if it did contribute towards Harry's character, and Dumbledore was horrible.

    3/5
     
    Last edited: Apr 18, 2009
  8. QuixoticStoic

    QuixoticStoic First Year

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    I read the first chapter and am impressed. Good characterization so far.
     
  9. KrzaQ

    KrzaQ Denarii Host DLP Supporter

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    At start: overly abusive (but believable) Dursleys, rushed plot at start. Gets better later. Harry shouldn't trust Hermione so easily. Neither should he bend to her wishes so much.

    Still, it's a 4/5 overall.
     
  10. Breed

    Breed Third Year

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    I liked it. One to watch.

    4/5 from me for now.
     
  11. Dr. Strange Lulz

    Dr. Strange Lulz Denarii Host DLP Supporter

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    I'm looking forward to more of this. It's been a long time since I found a first year story that I actually enjoyed enough to follow, so this really is a welcome surprise.

    There will probably be some comments about how Harry is either too mature or too witty for his age, but I was like that at 11.

    Overall I really enjoyed it.

    So for now I'll give it a 4/5
     
  12. malaga

    malaga Auror

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    I really enjoyed it, but this line weirds me out:

    Maybe I have my mind in the gutter, but so many bad jokes.

    4/5, as long as it isn't abandoned like, oh, every other First Year story ever.
     
  13. meatzman2

    meatzman2 Backtraced

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    Excellent fic, I very much enjoyed what has been written so far. Although Harry is far too intelligent, that is needed otherwise the story would be dull. I'm not so sure of the characterization of Dumbledore though, he seems entirely too malicious. I dislike the Dumbledore of most of the indy Harry genre, and this one seems like he might slot right in amongst them. However, the good writing and the constant plot progression at least at this stage allow me to ignore that for the most part.

    4/5 because there is too little for it to be excellent yet.
     
  14. Taure

    Taure Magical Core Enthusiast ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    I don't think the Dumbledore is an indy!Harry Dumbledore. I think he's supposed to be like canon only Harry is smarter so sees through him. After all, canon Dumbledore said things along the lines of "I'm sure you and the Dursleys love each other, deep down" too.

    Though to be fair Harry wasn't really abused in canon.
     
  15. Breed

    Breed Third Year

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    LOL.

    If you don't class making a child live in a cupboard for 11 years, then locking them in a room and serving food through a cat flap as abuse, you may want to hold off having children.

    Although, I'm pretty sure you meant he wasn't really physically abused in canon. In that case, I'd agree.
     
  16. meatzman2

    meatzman2 Backtraced

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    REALLY? Damn, I thought that was par for the course, my upbringing in a shoebox in middle of road seemed remarkably pleasant in comparison. Food through a catflap, jammy bastard, here I was eating cold poison. Honestly Harry was lucky Vernon didn't murder him in cold blood and dance around on his grave singing Hallelujah.

    *sarcasm and Yorkshiremen stops*

    He does have a point though Taure, I'm pretty damn sure that locking small children in cupboards and demeaning them constantly counts as child abuse. Then again, apparently the British Social Worker's aren't too hot at what they do.

    I'm sure there's a thread lurking around somewhere debating on what exactly the derision and abandonment Harry suffered at the Dursley's hands in canon constitutes. Philosopher's stone was a bit too much of a children's book for there to be obvious physical abuse, then again Watership Down is considered by some to be suitable for children *shudders*.
     
  17. Randeemy

    Randeemy Headmaster DLP Supporter

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    I think Taure meant things like killing Hedwig and battering the shit out of Harry, but I may be wrong.
     
  18. Rin

    Rin Oberstgruppenführer DLP Supporter

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    I'm rather enjoying the story so far. Definitely going on my alerts list.
     
  19. fanficlover

    fanficlover Fourth Year

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    It is certainly one of the better first year stories out there- no doubt about that.

    I don't think that Malfoy as a 11 year old would have antagonised Diggory prior to Hogwarts. That is not the age you go around saying that you'll get the other person's father sacked.

    Too much use of the "Ponce". I wouldn't have expected him to use Levicorpus in the duel either.

    A 3 for now.
     
  20. Howdy

    Howdy Dark Lord

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    This was my thought as well.

    I've finished reading the first five chapters, and am liking the story so far. We've got a Slytherin!Harry in Gryffindor, which frankly is much more refreshing than an actual Slytherin!Harry. We've got Harry who's good at magic without it reaching KiP levels of absurdity. We've got metamorph!Harry, which I still have yet to see an author actually work into a story without being a simple gimmick.

    kmfrank's Escape to Darkness may be one, though I'm pretty sure it hasn't been confirmed or denied that what Harry does is metamorph stuff. In fact it probably isn't since Grindelwald does it too to an extent.

    I have high hopes for this story, but as many others have said it's probably too early to rate this as more than a 4/5. I'm hoping for good things though.