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Complete What If By Hybrid2 - T

Discussion in 'The Alternates' started by The-Hyphenated-One, Jul 25, 2007.

  1. The-Hyphenated-One

    The-Hyphenated-One Chief Warlock DLP Supporter

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    Title: What If?
    Author: Hybrid2
    Genre:Adventure
    Pairing:N/A so far
    Raiting:T
    Dlp Category: Alternates
    Chapters: 46
    Words: 244,376
    Updated: August 9, 2008
    Published: July 3, 2007
    Status: It is labeled as complete but apparently covers only the first three years.

    Summary:This is AU in that Harry meets the twins in London, rather than his first Weasley meeting being Ron on the train. Since I've only plotted out through the first book's worth of story line, I'm not sure HOW AU it will get yet.

    Link:http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3633815/1/

    Basically this story explores a new entry into the wizarding world for Harry. By meeting the twins first, he is not prejudiced against any of the houses, but is aware of the shortcomings of each one.

    There are premises of Harry building strong alliances withing Slytherin, where he is sorted, and it features a smart Harry.

    Pretty short, but otherwise good. 4/5 for now.


    Checked by Minion, December 23, 2012
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 23, 2012
  2. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    This is a good story with a stupid premise.

    Meeting the twins didn't actually have much influence at Harry at all. They exchange a few words and part ways and we don't see them again. Harry is simply slightly OOC from the start.

    That said, the story is actually pretty good, especially all the effort invested in describing the classes and magic taught there.

    Overall, a fine Slytherin!Harry story, but it still has to show something that would distinguish it from the others.
    4/5
     
  3. Richard

    Richard Supreme Mugwump

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    I really like this story so far. Potter's totally different in this story versus the books. He's got more spine in this. The characterization is very well written. 4/5 for me. I just hope he doesn't turn him into a wuss when Dumbledore tries to walk all over him later.

    Richard.
     
  4. Manatheron

    Manatheron Headmaster

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    I would have to say that of all the Slytherin Harry Fic's I've ever read, this one seems to be the closest to Probable. Not nearly far enough along to give a definitive rating to however. Tentative 3.8/5 Depending on how long the author continues to describe day-to-day activities.
     
  5. Anlun

    Anlun Denarii Host

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    I'm not a big fan of first year AU, as usually nothing happens thats interesting. This fic did catch my eye though, and it was pretty enjoyable. I would like to see more plot development before rating.
     
  6. KenderCleric

    KenderCleric Lord of Plot Bunnies

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    While I don't usually care for Slytherin!Harry fics I gave this one a shot. While I think a few of the Slytherins and Snape are a little too accepting of Harry in general; the fic still seems to be progressing along a line I can believe.

    I can say I like the way Harry is being characterized in this fic. It seems like a realistic Slytherin persona. He's not evil or Dark, but his ambition and will to do well has lead him where he "belongs". His allowing the Hat to put him where it felt best, because it surely knew what it was doing, fit well with the character being portrayed. Harry is new to the Magical world and is trying his best to fit in and understand.

    Also, the fact that he wasn't made an instant outcast among the other Houses was a nice suprise. Normally he's instantly being called evil and what-not by Ron and the other Gryffindors as soon as he gets sorted into Slytherin. The more stand-offish and weary attitude this fic portrays seems far more reasonable. It also makes the shy and unsure attitudes of Hermione and Neville fit. They aren't sure of him, but so far don't think he's a Dark Lord Rising.

    While I usually hate Snape as a character I'm finding this author has done a fairly decent job with him thus-far. Harry's initial opinions of the man were obviously altered due to not having Gryffindor's badmouth him from the moment their eyes met. He still warns off Harry from acting like James and that fits. Harry's confusion over the warning was well done too. The attitude Snape takes from that point on seems appropriate. He's watchful of Harry, but also seems to grudgingly accept that he is not the boy he expected. I'll be interested to see where this goes.

    All in all I have to say I'm impressed. While I usually avoid Year 1 AUs because I don't want to reread all seven books I find this one interesting enough to stick with. The descriptions of the classes and Harry's efforts to do what it takes to "not get chucked back" to the Dusley's makes this a far more interesting read than most rewrites.

    4.5/5
     
  7. Myst

    Myst Headmaster

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    I rather enjoyed this.. and instead of explaining why I enjoyed this, I'll just refer you to KenderCleric's post above mine for that answer. ;)

    4/5
     
  8. LogrusMage

    LogrusMage Supreme Mugwump

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    The writing is pretty good. My only problem is it's a first year AU. That's a major turn off for me, because we basically know it's not going to get finished without some serious time skipping, and with the way he's going, that isn't possible. "Since I've only plotted out through the first book's worth of story line" scares me. Their are seven books, each progressively longer than the last. I think a people forget that the books grow in size, as well as number. Unless he goes totally AU on our asses, this could end up as another Slytherin!Harry rewrite, albeit a pretty good one. I agree with IP82 however, nothing standout about this.

    3/5 for now, can change if he manages to figure out a way to time skip and/or make drastic AU divisions.
     
  9. Richard

    Richard Supreme Mugwump

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    I have to agree with a few people. lol I can't wait to read about Dumbledore trying to talk Potter into going back to the Dursley's. I love it when a smartass Potter out talks Dumbledore into telling him that he's not going back. Its so funny. Anyway...still a 4/5 for me on the story.

    Richard.
     
  10. xcel

    xcel Looked into the void

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    Harry's dialogue sounds too smart for an eleven year old. Too formal.
     
  11. Mordecai

    Mordecai Drunken Scotsman Prestige DLP Supporter

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    Once again xcel, your post it highly constructive, well thought out and generally useful.

    As for the fic, not bad. Its not the best I've seen, but I reckon its library worthy.

    4/5
     
  12. 007_rock

    007_rock DA Member

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    Its the best first year AU, Slytherin Harry fic I have seen. Situations seem real enough, the attitude of Slytherins are perfectly done. The only problem I have seen is that this guy seems to base his story more on movies than books. Its not much, but it can turn nasty if unchecked.

    Overall a nice read and certainly a new look at the wizarding world without the old Gryffindor prejudice.

    4/5 till now.
     
  13. The-Hyphenated-One

    The-Hyphenated-One Chief Warlock DLP Supporter

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    Well it's been updated.

    This chapter is just like the others, well written and very easy to read. It kinda gives you an idea of what Harry will be doing during his time at Hogwarts. He will be attempting to show the prejudiced members of Hogwarts that the world is not just black and white, but grey as well.
    This is all with the help of twins and pranks.

    Pretty good update rate so far with this story, and I think it will be one of the better and more realistic Slytherin!Harry fics yet.
     
  14. TripticWriter

    TripticWriter Groundskeeper

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    Well, its the first time I read a asskisser!Harry... It really annoy me how he wants to please everyone, how he is afraid to be reject. He just seems so meek.

    And there is always this cliché that Slytherin don't have friend, just people who help them becoming stronger, richer etc... Stop dreaming, they are 11 years old children and even if they are raised in aristocratic environment they are not going to plan how to become minister...yet. That's what annoy me the most when an author send Harry to Slytherin they are all supa cool, never show there feeling, always be wary about the other etc...

    Sorry for the rant... :p

    But the author is good, nice description and solid writing. So I will keep reading.
     
  15. Sanctimonius

    Sanctimonius Fifth Year

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    This story conflicts slightly with me. On the one hand, it has solid writing, a good plot, and good characterization. But on the other hand, everything is too perfect. Harry feels a little like Toby McGuire: to good for his own good.

    I'll keep reading, but it needs conflict; however, looking back, it may be to early to judge, as conflict seems to be right around the corner.

    4/5.
     
  16. Snarf

    Snarf Squanchin' Party Bro! Prestige DLP Supporter

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    I can see this story dropping just for that fact that the author has a hard time pushing the plot forward. I haven't heard a word about Quirrel himself during the entire fic and the man's just suddenly going to pop up during the final scene and the author's going to have to explain who Quirrel is and such. Bad.

    Besides this error, I found this story very enjoyable. Slytherin/Indy!Harry stories are guilty pleasures of mine, I can't help it but they are just fun reads. If this author keeps it up, this story is going to be my favorite Slytherin!Harry story to date.
     
  17. Styx

    Styx Third Year

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    (bump)
    Anyone still reading this fic, now that its almost at the end of the 2nd year.

    As the plot is advancing its getting less and less of a DPL-fic. With semi-friendly Draco, Snape helping out with the Dursley-problem and so on.

    Still it has a solid plot, good characters. If it only ran off the OriginalPlot-rails by 3rd year it would be even better. There was a scene where Snape went afther Wormtail, but nothing has come of that thus far.
    -4/5-
     
  18. hchan1

    hchan1 Sixth Year

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    Huh, I thought the twins would do something earthshakingly major to Harry, like giving him a split personality through a botched prank or something. Instead, they talk a little, then Harry veers off into OOC-land. Strange way to begin a story.

    Looks like standard 'Everyone vs. Slytherin' fare. It'll be interesting to see what wins out in the end: Harry's idealism or the real world.