1. Hi there, Guest

    Only registered users can really experience what DLP has to offer. Many forums are only accessible if you have an account. Why don't you register?
    Dismiss Notice
  2. Introducing for your Perusing Pleasure

    New Thread Thursday
    +
    Shit Post Sunday

    READ ME
    Dismiss Notice

WIP Young Love by Ekusukallybaa - T - Naruto

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by Tutorial Boss, Jul 24, 2016.

  1. Tutorial Boss

    Tutorial Boss Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2012
    Messages:
    242
    Title: Young Love
    Author: Ekusukallybaa
    Rating: T
    Genre: Humor/Romance
    Status: WIP
    Fandom: Naruto
    Pairings: Female Naruto/Sasuke. Kinda.
    Length: 11k, 3 chapters
    Summary: Sasuke had a very good reason for running away from Konoha.
    Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11832972/1/Young-Love

    So.

    First thing that you have to understand is that this is weapons grade crack. It's possibly the second best Naruto crack fic I've read. The basic premise is simple: Yandere fem!Naruto. He slightly mirrors canon events, but puts them to a very entertaining and slightly disturbing premise. It might not appeal to everyone, but I think it's great - and impressive how they stuck to extreme, full out Yandere. It's short, doesn't boast much depth, and certainly isn't an amazing fic, but I think it's funny enough to be library-worthy. It covers enough time and important events, though, for sure.

    It's one of the best crack-fics I've read, and it's well-executed. 4/5.
     
    Last edited: Jul 24, 2016
  2. D.H.

    D.H. Seventh Year DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Aug 9, 2011
    Messages:
    237
    Location:
    Washington State
    This was pretty funny. It does well to stay in the parameters of kind of fic it is (crack, comedy) and still have a decent narrative.

    This fic should probably be done where it is right now. At three chapters and 11k words the concept of Yandere Naruko works, but any more than this and the humor will start to stale.

    This probably shouldn't make it into the Library, it's more almost recommended quality. 3/5
     
  3. Republic

    Republic The Snow Queen ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2010
    Messages:
    2,272
    Location:
    Germany occupied Greece
    High Score:
    4,495
    Yeah, this didn't work for me. I guess the author knew what he was going for and stayed true to it, but this did nothing for me at all.

    2/5 for the effort, I guess.
     
  4. Nazgus

    Nazgus Dark Lord DLP Supporter DLP Gold Supporter

    Joined:
    Mar 16, 2011
    Messages:
    1,985
    Location:
    Mordor
    Does what it set out to do and there were a couple laughs throughout it, but nothing special.

    3/5 from me.
     
  5. Mutton

    Mutton Unspeakable

    Joined:
    Feb 20, 2011
    Messages:
    792
    It needed to end after 1 chapter and go down as a great one shot.
     
  6. Pure Infinity

    Pure Infinity High Inquisitor

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2012
    Messages:
    585
    Gender:
    Male
    I'm a bit conflicted on this. On one hand, it features a yandere, and I love yanderes. On the other hand, this yandere kinda sucks. Too much yanderu, too little deredere. It's meant to be humorous, so I understand why this is - but I want to try to explain why, despite this being the type of fic that it is, this falls flat.

    The best kind of yandere is one that is typically normal, and often incredibly sweet, but has a secret obsessive crazy side that randomly comes out. The best yanderes are great not just because of their craziness - but because that craziness contrasts heavily with them being incredibly cute, and nice. That contrast also allows for some solid comedy.

    Naruko doesn't have that sweet side. Her insanity is full throttle 100% of the time, and as such, the humor falls flat. Whenever she acts sweet, she also acts crazy. Her yanderu is built into her deredere! There's no down time where she doesn't act crazy. She basically comes across as a yandere Jar Jar Binks. Always funny all the time - and thus never funny any of the time.

    She isn't subtle enough. Her entire character description can be summed up as a violent obsession with Sasuke. And that's fine - it's just a humor fic. But it doesn't allow for the same depth of comedy and romance I've seen from other yandere centric stories.

    As such, the humor should come from the other characters reaction to her craziness. And I guess it is kind of amusing - but not amusing enough to warrant anything above a 2/5, I think.
     
Loading...