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Yelling Yourself Yellow With Yetis by Pseudonym Sam - T

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by Mordac, Aug 6, 2008.

  1. Mordac

    Mordac Minister of Magic DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2006
    Messages:
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    Gender:
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    Location:
    Birmingham, England
    Title: Yelling Yourself Yellow With Yetis
    Author: Pseudonym Sam
    Rating: T
    Genre: Humor/General
    DLP Category: Unsure, either general Fics or Humor/Parody
    Pairing: None
    Status: WIP
    Summary: What happens when you mix the Chinese military, Magizoologists, militant animal rights activists, wizarding bureaucrats, and a mad escaped yeti, besides chaos? YOU YELL YOURSELF YELLOW OF COURSE! Whatever that means...
    Link: www.fanfiction.net/s/4236233/1/Yelling_Yourself_Yellow_With_Yetis

    One of the best fics I've found in a while. Of course, Harry isn't anywhere in it, but the story's great style and hilarious plot more than make up for it. 5/5 for me!
     
  2. Kensington

    Kensington Denarii Host DLP Supporter

    Joined:
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    Messages:
    1,356
    Location:
    West Coast
    4.5/5 for me.

    This story definitely wins for original plot. The biggest concern I have with it is that it doesn't truly feel like a Harry Potter story, with the plethora of original characters. However, with this being a humorous story and there being little expectation of character development, combined with the quality of the original characters (especially the German magiczoologist), the author gets away with having none of the characters from the HP series involved so far.
     
  3. Cy Block

    Cy Block Second Year

    Joined:
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    Clark & Addison
    I have some problems with this. It’s not desperately well written, but good enough. The fukken italics are annoying. Some of the time they are used correctly, but more often than not they tell me which part of some inner monologue I’m supposed to emphasise. I’d rather figure that out by myself.

    Then there’s the giant elephant in the room. This is not a Harry Potter story. Even assuming that this “Nigel Zephyr” fellow is the very man (and everything else would be ludicrous), this is at best “Harry Potter Presents:” Like those direct-to-dvd “American Pie” movies. The one nobody ever saw, but inexplicably still starred Eugene Levy. This doesn’t have to be a dealbreaker, but so far it makes for very disjointed storytelling.

    Then there’s the amount of characters introduced in a very short time. Shit is confusing, because it’s not always clear who will remain relevant. If I consider that he was killed almost instantly there was too much time wasted on the character of Corporal Cai. This has the makings of a fic that uses 300k words to tell a story that could be done with in 70,000.

    It is sometimes very obvious where the author found inspiration. The sources are funny, so there is hope. The Call of Duty passage was, however, really useless. The Benjamin Dover pun was shit (Bend over! Comedy gold.), but it has the feel of a story that might yet have some amusing moments. I’m going to give this a few more chances, but the factions better start fighting soon. I mean how long can it take for the environmentalists (Ben Dover eat your heart out) to get to Tibet?
     
  4. Goddessa39

    Goddessa39 DA Member

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    Location:
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    Hmm... the writing style was pretty good. But where was Harry? Couldn't read ver far. 3/10 points.
     
  5. Iztiak

    Iztiak Prisoner DLP Supporter

    Joined:
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    2,932
    ...If you don't actually read the story, it might be best if you don't rate it.
     
  6. knothead

    knothead Groundskeeper

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2007
    Messages:
    362
    Interesting, maybe even intriguing. But where's Harry? Hermione? Where's a Weasley? Any Weasley, even the squib accountant Weasley?
     
  7. Goddessa39

    Goddessa39 DA Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
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    I went back and read it when I was looking for some humor. It was pretty good for a piece of fiction so far, but where is our boy hero and the other people associated with him? FICTION. It isn't really part of the fan network save for the whole wizarding idea mixed in.

    Needs some Harry in it.
     
  8. Feoffic

    Feoffic Alchemist DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2006
    Messages:
    2,260
    Fan Fiction doesn't have to include the characters from the original piece in it at all. Yeah that is what many of us expect, but expectations lead to presumptions which lead to stagnation.

    Anyway, I skimmed the first chapter and it seems interesting enough to fully read it at a later date. Only problem I had was the use of Chinese, while not used excessively, like in some Naruto fics where every other fucking word is Japanese, it was used enough to irk me whenever I read it.
     
  9. thapagan

    thapagan High Inquisitor

    Joined:
    Jun 24, 2006
    Messages:
    577
    Tried it, made it to the third chapter, may read more later.
    This is the stuff to keep the harry potter legend going, when I think of the TV Series to be "wacky hi-jinks, silly wizards, and a world weary harry potter, phoning in his reports to a shill H. Granger about how he saved the day again"

    Or maybe not?