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Abandoned Ripples in Time by padfootsrevenger - K+

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by LuxDragon, Aug 23, 2009.

  1. LuxDragon

    LuxDragon Fourth Year

    Joined:
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    Messages:
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    Title: Ripples in Time
    Author: padfootsrevenger
    Rating: K+
    Genre: General
    DLP Category: Time Travel
    Pairing: None So Far
    Chapters: 26
    Words: 94,782
    Updated: Aug 10, 2008
    Published: Sep 7, 2006
    Status: Abandoned

    Summary: Harry is victorious and Voldemort is gone, but not all is as it should be. Thrown into the past Harry takes on the role of James Potter’s long lost cousin and attempts to do the one thing Hermione always warned him about. Is this a second chance or curse?
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3143742/1/

    First off, 5/5 from me and more if it's possible. New take on the Harry goes back to his parents fic.

    First off, Harry is two years "younger" than his parents. Can't really explain more without spoiling the whole fic, but Harry is actually 17.

    Harry understands how to be both cunning and powerful. Thankfully, the author shows this in a very tasteful manner. You'll see Harry grow more intelligent and more cunning over the span of CHAPTERS, not sentences/paragraphs.

    Truly, the best parts of this fic is watching how "11" year-old Harry can outwit both Dumbledore (Slightly Manip!Dumbledore, but only because he's a lot like cannon) and Voldemort (Where Harry's existance will confuse the hell out of him).

    The interactions between Voldemort and Harry is probably the best parts, but not the usual fare that most are used too.

    Next is the characterization. The author makes a nice balance out of all of them. Nothing too extreme like Ass!James, Idiot!Sirius or Bitchy!Lily. He somehow wrote the characters to be very believeable, even likeable, without going to the extremes. Even Snape's done quite well. Everyone acts their age. (Except Harry, but he's always the exception)

    Finally, Harry has a solid head on his shoulders. He's not a genius overnight or on par with Hermione, but he knows he can't be an idiot like Ron and slack off. He studies, he plans, and he learns to kick ass from the background. Most of all, NO EMO!Harry.

    Other misc stuff: Okay spelling, grammer, but they could be better, and a decent grasp of HP lore.

    I definitely feel that this is library worthy, which is funny since my searches turned up nil and this fic is at 26 chapters.

    Checked by Minion, June 6, 2015
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 6, 2015
  2. azrael

    azrael Professor

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    Sounds decent enough, though it looks like it could be abandoned or it has a very slow update rate. More after I read.
     
    Last edited: Aug 23, 2009
  3. ZeroTheDestroyer

    ZeroTheDestroyer Auror

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    Pretty sure this one is abandoned. The guy has other fics he seems to be focusing on.
     
  4. Grubdubdub

    Grubdubdub Supreme Mugwump

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    RiT is the last story updated by the author, though.
     
  5. azrael

    azrael Professor

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    Alright, now I've finished reading what is already there, I'll actually review. Overall, it was a good story. It was very well written, although there were some spelling mistakes and typos. The plot and characterization were engaging, but sometimes confusing. It seems like in later chapters the author tries to make the story conform at least partially to DH, despite the clear disparity in Harry's captivity and time travel. I felt that Harry's past(future?) could have used more information. When is he captured? How did he become so badass? How did the others get killed? These things go completely unexplained.

    Overall, I would give it 4/5.
     
  6. ZeroTheDestroyer

    ZeroTheDestroyer Auror

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    Really? Weird, when I read it a few months ago he keeps saying this story was a secondary project on the author's notes, maybe things have changed. Anyway I still give the fic 4/5. It is a good read even if it gets a little too fishy near the end.
     
    Last edited: Aug 23, 2009
  7. Bittersweet

    Bittersweet Groundskeeper

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    I remember reading this a while ago (when it was still being updated). And it was a really nice read, very well written. Definitely library worthy.

    4/5
     
  8. scaryisntit

    scaryisntit Death Eater

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    I'm only up to chapter six so I can't comment on later chapters. However, most of the last two chapters has seen a decline in the quality of the writing.

    Scenes such as these just read really awkwardly. There's minimal to non-existent descriptions of locations, which is usually okay for familiar locales, but we're left to imagine what the Potter family home looks like - just told that it has secret passages since James gets stuck in one.

    I'm hoping it improves. Although at this stage there's no hints at all of a plot (Harry adjusting to the new family is not a plot), it's somewhat pleasurable to read, so I hope it becomes more interesting.
     
    Last edited: Aug 24, 2009
  9. Innomine

    Innomine Alchemist ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Absolutely no plot, and nothing interesting at all happening. 2/5 tbh. 3/5, if I was really generous.
     
  10. Aekiel

    Aekiel Angle of Mispeling ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    [​IMG]

    On topic, I'm heading off to read this now. Will review properly later.
     
  11. Clerith

    Clerith Ahegao Emperor ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    This. Most of the fic is pure drivel. And boring as hell. Happy family life, my arse. I read the first 15 chapters, and NOTHING that intrested me had happened. Then I leafed through the rest, and it was all the same.

    And I was annyed at the cliches in the beginning. Omniscient!Ollivander, Potter Castle, Potter immediately wanting to adopt Harry, family love, blah blah.

    2/5.
     
  12. Lord Potter

    Lord Potter Backtraced

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    Damn Cliches! this story is well written, but boring... I feel like killing myself after reading 11 chapters. Harry/Ginny Fails, Ron/Hermione (Never!)

    1 for being well written, -3 boring, -1 Harry/Ginny

    = 1/5
     
  13. Sesc

    Sesc Slytherin at Heart Moderator

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    I winced at Voldemort's line in chapter 22. Even if it's not actually true, it brings back the worst kind of memories from certain crapfics.


    Er, was that something you always wanted to say? Because I somehow fail to see the relevance to this thread. Ginny isn't mentioned there, at all. And the story is about Harry travelling to the past, to the time of Voldemort's first rise, so how would there even be Harry/Ginny (or Ron/Hermione, for that matter)?

    I do not think you read the first eleven chapters. At least not of this story.

    And you meant -3/5.
     
  14. Innomine

    Innomine Alchemist ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Yeah, read the right freaking story before you decide to review it. This is a time travel fic, there is no Ginny, Ron, or Hermione. There is only Harry, and OCs pretty much.
     
  15. Lord Potter

    Lord Potter Backtraced

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    Sorry, wrong story, I was going to post this for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows Do over... Please ignore me.
     
  16. ZeroTheDestroyer

    ZeroTheDestroyer Auror

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    That is why I thought it got bad near the end. He totally ignored the main caste and just started adding new characters like McKinon, and it pissed me off.
     
  17. Bratling

    Bratling Professor

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    I've always rather liked this story. It's a solid construction and it frankly goes further than most time travel to Marauders' era stories. I like that he's managed to change some of the timeline already and the fact that he stumbled into a few things (with his made up background) is interesting. I wish it wasn't abandoned, though. 4/5
     
  18. Manatheron

    Manatheron Headmaster

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    Contains spoilers:


    There were some rough patches early on, The 'heir ring' and omnipotent Immortal ollivander primary, must say I enjoyed Fawks' interactions. Well, with the exceptions of the mind speak with Albus later on, and the fact that both Albus and harry can read his body language as though he were speaking, but those scene's were short enough to be excusable.

    Letting Dumbledore and Voldemort think that harry is Riddle's blood kin somehow was a stroke of genius.

    I lost my previous post, so I'm going to pick up with the nitpicking at chapter 23: Hinting that Ollivander and harry are the same person is... I don't know what it is, but it's annoying.

    25: I'm trying to decide how this prophesy is actually going to work as harry's been making up his history as he goes and so it wouldn't be valid. All I can come up with is a body swap or soul insertion into someone who should have died, the very person he's claiming to be.

    26: Finale chapter to date. Despite some rather glaring (and annoying) cliche' the story is wholly readable. Very much so to tell the truth. As I mentioned I lost the first chunk of my critique when the browser crashed, but I only felt comments were needed every 2-3 chapters which is quite good since they were mostly nit-picks.

    Acceptable:

    4/5

    PS. Has anyone else noticed that all authors with 'Padfoot' in the name like to make a half dozen+ stories and never finish any of them?
     
  19. sirius009

    sirius009 Minister of Magic

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    The writing is solid, and the story is decent, however, there are a few things that just bug me like..
    Why/how does Harry's story "check out?"
    How is Harry going to prove that he's French, does he know the language?
    He jumps to the conclusion that he must've went back in time almost instantaniously.
    He acts far far too mature for a ten year old.
     
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