I find Snape extremely difficult to write without repeating myself, or cliche-ing. (?)

Example:

Snape glared at Harry.

Harry Glared Back

Snape upped the GlarePower.

Harry added a sneer

Snape shot him his Boltron Glare #3

Harry stepped back in fear

Snape smirked in Victory

Harry: How?

Snape: I am your father!

*Harry's magical glamour cast by Lily drops and he looks like Snape. Raises hand to the heavens*

Harry: I can't believe you Mum, You Ho!

Snape Smirks in Victory...again.

Harry: Ok, well. Can you teach me the cloak trick?

Snape: Yes, my dear son, Darius Snape.

*Hugs Him and they go on their merry way*


The End.

Wtf?

Can you guys list out some pointers when writing Snape? Mannerisms, speech patterns, etc. Oh, and a Glare classification list would be good too .

 

He uses a soft voice when he is at his most dangerous, or when talking to Harry. He takes a perverse satisfaction in causing Harry pain. His eyes are like a bottomless pit and tend to have people get lost in them as he takes their thoughts. Thats all I can think of at the moment.

 

A really good guideline for how Snape acts can be found in nonjon's You Did What!. It is in chapter twelve, and it is called the Slytherin Manifesto.

 

He controls his emotions and never blows up. Thats all I can really give you.

 

I find it easiest to just think of the person you hate and despise the most. Now imagine them trying their hardest to act cool.

And that's Severus Snape.

I wouldn't say he controls his emotions and never blows up. He's frequently angry, rattled, and perturbed in canon. E.g., with Quirrell when Harry's under the invisibility cloak, arguing with Dolohov, Sirius' escape, anytime Harry doesn't get punished by Albus, when Harry's busted peeking in the pensieve (which I still think had to have been intentional).

He's a slightly more controlled, but still irrational grown up version of Draco Malfoy. His secret of being a Death Eater isn't a secret to anyone (of course post-HBP even more so). In my opinion, he's trying so hard to be what he thinks he should be, that you can nearly make him into whatever you want. Hence all the lonely fangirls make him a great big homosexual sweetie underneath it all, while others turn him far more evil and malevolent. The mere presence of this "mask" he wears points to the idea he's really smart, and his potions notes in his old book certainly lean that way, but you can still make him an idiot and keep it in character too. The mere situation he is in tells you he had to have screwed up somewhere.

 

It's all up for interpretation I suppose. I see him as very clever above all else. Ther's no way you can go between two of the most powerful wizards and still stay in one piece without being quick witted and talented. I would say he's a loner and likes it that way. Definitely amazing at dueling, HBP proved that. Above all else he wears a mask of confidence which he hides behind and behind it is a self-conscious, bitter man who desperately wants to belong.

His speech is surprisingly eloquent and he tends to talk down to people. So no "You stink Potter!!" etc. Best thing to do is read key scenes in HBP again, especially the 'Unbreakable Vow' chapter, the chapter where he's talking to Malfoy and the chapter where he and Malfoy are running away.

Rather than always write "he glared at..." when writing him, write things like "his eyes narrowed dangerously" or "his lips thinned". There are lots of ways to show a character is angry other than "glaring" - please use them.

So yeah, best way of hitting him on the head is by reading canon - NOT fanon.

 

You guys forget the robes. Every fic involving Snape HAS to include a paragraph about his robes that flutter like a breeze is blowing through them.

 

you have to remember that the only times we really see much of snape is when harry is around, we all know that he hates harry so he has reason to act like he does. basicly you can make him any way you want to but if you want to make him act like he does in canon all the time then use big words and sarcasim.

 

Wow, i did not even realize it was so hard to write snape until i visited this thread but now that i think about it, its difficult mostly because none of us have personalities like Snape. I think you have to be from another planet to pull of crap like that. But i find his character quite interesting and emensly enjoyed the background info that Rowling fed us in HBP. she has to do more of that with both Snape and other characters like neville or even Harry potter before he came to hogwarts to help us write better stories.
of course she wont do that cause she hates Fanfiction, probably cause there are better writers here than her. lol

 

What?! I was always under the impression that she allowed Harry Potter fan fiction. Correct me if I am wrong.

 

ah... Seems that Nonjon is the one i would tend to agree with, but a few more details on how i like Snape.

Snape, in my mind, is someone who is arrogant enough to think he can serve both AD and V, or serve one or the other, and come out unscathed. While true to a degree, i believe both know that snape isn't their perfect minion-AD because Snape is too angry, and V because snape doesnn't grovel quickly enough.

I have Snape as someone excessively proud of himself, and if he hates morons, he hates even more people surpassing him. That would explain why his teaching method are purposefully substandart- he doesn't teach his own methods.

Snape is also, in my opinion, a very bitter man. That result in him not being able to control himself in numerous occasions.

ps: i still wonder why fanon have snape as being "cool"... Oh, and the thin lips are Mcgonnagal thing, usualy.

 

He is someone who has always attempted to be perceived as superior, while having to deal with feeling like no one, including himself, saw himself as enough. The Half-Blood Prince is a perfect example. For all the comparisons between Harry and Tom Riddle, they are more or less nothing alike. Harry had two magical parents, both who love him and each other. Its really Snape that should be looked at in comparison with Tom Riddle. 1)One Muggle father, One witch mother. 2) Uncaring Father 3)Made up some stupid name to bring out their mother's ancestry and undermine their father's. 4) Deeply involved in the Dark Arts. 5)Expands the wrongs of individuals onto the general populace (James = Potters, All Weasleys, etc...) 5)Both having to deal with being half-bloods while being in an environment that looked down on such things.

You want to make him a character that makes other's feel small, but you don't have to do this solely through facial expressions. He seems to be a character that would stare blankly at another until that person felt stupid, or glare at them. He doesn't need to be consistent in his methods, only his attempted goal really. He always uses other's weaknesses against them (Neville's fear, Harry's anger, Hermione's want of validation, etc) He's intelligent, but uses that intelligence to belittle others. He expects others to see the world as he does and learn as he would. (I'm sure you know people like that) While being entirely unempathic with regards to how others should do things, he does have a very good grasp of how to rile another up.

He is a little man that feels as though life as been unfair to him and that others should acknowledge this as such and treat him better for it. He seems to want validation for his hardships and not his accomplishments. Any guilt he may have felt for the prophecy leak is obviously very small if he can still take his hatred of James out on Harry.

Harry should always be a blind spot for him, no matter what. As a spy(for both sides which I'm sure both realized), you could probably expect him to be observant with regards to everything non-Harry.

I always felt (and there is little evidence for this, but I think it fits) that part of his annoyance with Harry is how little he devotes himself. Snape has ALWAYS known the beginning of the prophecy and knows that Harry is the one who has to destroy Voldemort.