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WIP Ladies, Ladies, Ladies by Sub-Zero879 - Diablo - M

Discussion in 'Games' started by Clerith, Mar 25, 2010.

  1. Clerith

    Clerith Ahegao Emperor ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Title: Ladies, Ladies, Ladies
    Author: Sub-Zero879
    Rating: M
    Genre: Humor
    DLP Category: Other Fandoms
    Pairing: Harem (Blood Raven, Andariel, Countess, Rogues)
    Status: WIP

    Summary: A Necromancer, one step from becoming a demon himself, is forced into saving Sanctuary from the Prime Evils, starting at the Rogue Encampment. But he's just a bard, and some of those demons are... quite attractive. Harem. Serious-parody. Warning: lemons.

    Link: Here

    As the summary states, an OC Necromancer gathers a harem of corrupted and demons, and is off to defeat the Prime Evils.

    First of all, about the OC. Frankly, he's one of the better OCs I've ever read about. I never grew annoyed at him, and he's not a gary-stu. He's got a Tragic Past, of course, but that actually brings him maturity and experience.

    It's the spin on the harem what this fic is all about, though. Something about getting those hot (to a necromancer) demons is pretty lulzy. I can never look at them the same way again. There is no real harem interactions beetween the girls, and the max harem size will be six members. It's... a surprisingly bearable system, as far as harems go.

    The Diablo-style combat was surprisingly well done, and quite amusing, especially in the beginning.

    This is well written, although the later chapters need some cleaning, as this was originally mean to be one-shot. The author just updated a coupla days ago, though, and the fic reached 100k+ words!

    Since it's M, there will be wading in blood and crushing some monster brains, as well as lemons. Those lemons are actually somewhat above average, and certainly not painful to read.

    If you ever played D2, I recommend you to give this a try.
     
  2. ZeroTheDestroyer

    ZeroTheDestroyer Auror

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    Hly blz, this is incredible. Three chapters, 100,000 words! Wow.

    Also is this girl part of the harem?
    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 12, 2011
  3. Clerith

    Clerith Ahegao Emperor ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Andariel? Yeah, she is... though she's a bit less clothed, and often takes a smaller form. Not always, though XD
     
  4. ZeroTheDestroyer

    ZeroTheDestroyer Auror

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    ...less clothed? Is she even wearing any now?
     
  5. Portus

    Portus Heir

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    I hate to be the one to break it to you, but *that*... is not a *girl*. Having tits (or tit-like shapes where tits ought to be?) doesn't make it a girl, especially when there are what appear to be claw-like things coming out of "its" back and "it" is walking around on what look to be cloven goat legs.

    Yeah, I'm gonna have to say that an open-front bikini-thing (with chains and knobs hooked on where the nipples should be) does not a woman make. And whoever is attempting to write smut involving this thing in the visualize has *got* to be one disturbed motherfucker. Or demonfucker, as it were.
     
  6. Andro

    Andro Master of Death DLP Supporter

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    It's a little sly in that it reads completely serious. I was working up a rant about the lack of separation between gameplay mechanics and narration before I realized that was the point. It eventually struck me as funny, how people will thrust quests on the poor OC, how he picks up items from corpses, etc.

    It's a good story. 4/5. The writing itself is good, but you'll find carbon copies of the style in hundreds of writers on FFnet.

    Edit: I have to take umbrage with everyone insisting on calling him Necromancer. What the fuck?! He says he's a bard repeatedly. Even if they think he's lying, how about some basic harmless courtesy? Unbelievable.

    What about trans-gender people? Technically they're still the same gender as when they were born since their genitalia is only mutilated, but people still act polite and acknowledge them as whatever gender they switched to. Same principle.

    There's also a sad moment turned hilarious when the oc finds the corpse of a small boy, which then begins spewing gold.
     
    Last edited: Mar 26, 2010
  7. Tehan

    Tehan Avatar of Khorne DLP Supporter

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    Actually, I think at the Diablo level of social and technological development, trans-gender people tend to get burned at the stake rather than be cruelly called their birth genders. Considering the rather substantial stigma against necromancy, it's not surprising that he gets tarred with the name despite what he says.
     
  8. Chime

    Chime Dark Lord

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    Andariel rose from her throne, and in two massive strides she stood before Zyke, peering down at him. Down between her breasts. Then, she knelt down so they were face to face. She was beautiful, though with a strange hairstyle, and her black eyes were unique. She spoke softly, fighting humiliation, "I, Andariel, daughter of Lilith... am willing to serve."

    There was a shimmering around her, suddenly. She pulled back, but that wasn't all that happening. She was shrinking. Her wild hair fell around her, the nipple caps dropped, her hands and feet shifted from red flesh into normal looking limbs. The claws from her back retracted into her. Her completely bared breasts unfortunately stopped their amazing floating show, reducing in size slightly while falling to her chest... yet retaining an excellent amount of perkiness.

    Then, she was the same size as him, and she stood. The metal plate she had from before clattered to the floor. Zyke paused to stare at her like this.

    The hair changed everything, really, as the long strands fell around her – most behind her, though some on either side of her breasts. Once he could see past that... she looked much the same. The hands and feet weren't too noticeable before, and the spider-legs from before left only an impression. And now she stood before him entirely nude, breasts rising and falling with her breaths, netherlips covered by a triangular patch of red hair – her impression of a mortal female.

    For the first time, it really hit Zyke. He had done it. He not only survived Andariel, but the Lesser Evil served under him. Him, a bard! He nearly laughed in joy and relief, but she might see that as cruel. He settled with a smile. "Thank you, Andy."

    She doesn't stay that way. Though, this story is full of debauchery and sex :9 so if you don't really like female demons following a Necromancer... better stay away from this.

    I like the story. The supporting characters are slightly dull (they're too easily swayed by the protagonist) I like the main character and his backstory. I think this is enjoyable and long enough to be archived. A good mix of humor and seriousness.

    5/5
     
  9. ZeroTheDestroyer

    ZeroTheDestroyer Auror

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    Hly sht! Chapter 2 was hot! This is some of the most intense anthro I've ever read!

    5/5
     
  10. Tehan

    Tehan Avatar of Khorne DLP Supporter

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    Furries? In my DLP?
     
  11. Clerith

    Clerith Ahegao Emperor ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    I'm a bit hesitant to include catgirls...

    *sigh* furries ye be.

    Hm, Act IV was a bit different from the earlier chapters, but not bad at all.
     
  12. LT2000

    LT2000 Heir

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    Read this before finding it here (actually playing Diablo II has been eating up most of my free time lately, lol). The whole thing kinda jumped the shark for me when Andariel just went along with serving under and being a part of some mortal's war harem. The 'lesser' enemies like Blood Raven and the Countess I could have taken with a small grain of salt, but Andy was just a bit too much.
     
  13. Chime

    Chime Dark Lord

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    I agree. I think Andy's inclusion into the harem could have been handled better. And the cat girl? Eugh.

    But it's still pretty decent. New chapter's up too. It was worth the read in my opinion, and that's something considering it's an OC Harem story in a roguelike universe.
     
  14. ZeroTheDestroyer

    ZeroTheDestroyer Auror

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    The cat girl is unique. Reminds me of the girl from Dragon Pink.
     
  15. Tehlaziboi

    Tehlaziboi Ninja Meido

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    Humorous though I think him having sex with Andariel is seriously pushing it. The same can be said with the anthro and her four jugs.

    Overall, one of the best stories in the Diablo archives, which isn't saying much.
    4/5
     
    Last edited: Mar 30, 2010