1. DLP Flash Christmas Competition + Writing Marathon 2024!

    Competition topic: Magical New Year!

    Marathon goal? Crank out words!

    Check the marathon thread or competition thread for details.

    Dismiss Notice
  2. Hi there, Guest

    Only registered users can really experience what DLP has to offer. Many forums are only accessible if you have an account. Why don't you register?
    Dismiss Notice
  3. Introducing for your Perusing Pleasure

    New Thread Thursday
    +
    Shit Post Sunday

    READ ME
    Dismiss Notice

Abandoned Only Enemies by leave this world - T

Discussion in 'The Alternates' started by Cell, Apr 18, 2006.

  1. Cell

    Cell Gunner of The Black Poison DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2006
    Messages:
    283
    Location:
    NorCal
    Title:Only Enemies
    Author:leave this world
    Rating:T
    Genre: Action/Adventure/Drama
    Pairing: HHr moving to H/Bella
    Chapters: 20
    Words: 81,169
    Updated: March 26, 2009
    Published: April 16, 2006
    Status: Abandoned

    Summary:In the aftermath of the Final battle a misplaced spell sends HP and Bellatrix to an alternative world. It holds everything each of them have lost to the war and yet they find themselves inexorably drawn back to each other. HHr moving to HBela
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2896398/1/


    Some good fighting with lethal spells being throwns instead of those little light spells.No Imperious Bellla by her master.Her and Harry are archenemies even though they made a truce and cease-fire agreement.


    Checked by Minion, January 5, 2013
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 5, 2013
  2. Promios

    Promios Fourth Year

    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2006
    Messages:
    120
    Location:
    Sweden
    I liked it. I just didnt like the way Harry told the headmaster everything and wanted to meet his friends. I guess it is understandable though
     
  3. Avitus

    Avitus Groundskeeper

    Joined:
    May 1, 2005
    Messages:
    375
    Location:
    Canada
    um...what? :O_O:
     
  4. Promios

    Promios Fourth Year

    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2006
    Messages:
    120
    Location:
    Sweden
    :D When Harry met the headmaster he told him everything, that he was Harry Potter and came from a AU and stuff like that. Not very Slytherin.
    If I was him, id train. He wanted to meet his friends, wich was annoying because I hate HG and RW.

    Lol, I was just tired when I wrote that shit.
     
  5. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

    Joined:
    Nov 14, 2005
    Messages:
    2,921
    This is EXTREMELY good beggining. Has high potential of turning into the best Harry/Bella fic ever, IF the author keep Bella in character.
     
  6. Yes, it does indeed hold great potential, good beginning, and few grammatical errors. As long as the author doesn't turn Harry back into the pansy he is cannon, or makes Bella sane and good, it has indeed one of the greatest potentials I’ve seen in alternate universe fics.
     
  7. Scarty

    Scarty Denarii Host DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2006
    Messages:
    170
    Location:
    Germany
    Yeah the Start is promising.
    It has potential.

    I like Bella, with this little bit insanity. And I really hope for this FanFic that Harry will not gonna be together with Hermione or Ginny in the new World.

    Let them wreak Havoc :mrgreen:
     
  8. Tobang

    Tobang Fourth Year

    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2005
    Messages:
    128
    Location:
    12th largest state in the USA
    I admit it has one or two ‘…yeah right’ moments, but it’s still a fantastic fic.

    If you let the fact that the headmaster is going to likely be portrayed in a good light let you stop reading this fic, then it your loss.
     
  9. Ivy_Snowe

    Ivy_Snowe Second Year

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2006
    Messages:
    53
    Location:
    Colorado
    I do hope that the author does keep to a Bella/Harry. At the very least I'll settle for no pairing. I just have to hope I won't need to drop it because it's H/Hr or H/G, that would just be disappointing. I enjoy this fic so far...


    EDIT: I just spoke with the author and there will be minor H/Hr for a couple of chapters. Absolutely no H/G (rejoice) main pairing will always be Harry/Bella
     
  10. Scarty

    Scarty Denarii Host DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2006
    Messages:
    170
    Location:
    Germany
    mhm, for me that is acceptable,
     
  11. razz

    razz Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Jan 22, 2006
    Messages:
    224
    Location:
    Melbourne
    From the author's bio it looks as though he's pretty into Harry/Bella. I totally adore the concept of this fic, but it's just not written well enough to hold my interest. It does look, though, that he's giving the basis for the relationship a lot of thought - so (for once) you could hope it might come off somewhat realistic. It's so hard to get that pairing right ...
     
  12. Promios

    Promios Fourth Year

    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2006
    Messages:
    120
    Location:
    Sweden
    The 5th chapter is out. It was good, even if it wanst Harry-centric.
     
  13. Syn

    Syn Fourth Year

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2005
    Messages:
    130
    Location:
    Chicago
    i'm really digging this fic. it has all the elements i want in a story right now...strong harry, (thus far) in character bella, bad dumbledore (so far done well...imo), and it's written coherently and with depth.
     
  14. Tobang

    Tobang Fourth Year

    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2005
    Messages:
    128
    Location:
    12th largest state in the USA
    I formally retract my previous statement now…Dumbeldore isn’t a good guy….at all. Hell, I don’t think there is a good guy in this story yet.

    This story is practically the definition of a perfect story for half the members of this site. Strong!Harry, Manipulative!Dumbeldore, H/B and its just laced with cunning and fresh new ideas.

    Not to mention that the Harry Hermione interaction scene that’s coming up is looking t be really good.
     
  15. Malice?

    Malice? First Year

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2006
    Messages:
    29
    Author saying hi

    Hey, I noticed that you guys posted my story up here and thought I'd say thanks, always have liked this site.

    Now, if anyone has any questions about where this is going, plot points whatever, feel free to pm and ill answer them if they don't give away too much.

    Question to razz: what points of style didn't do it for you? any suggestions?
     
  16. It was a good chapter, and it at least showed Dumbledore as a manipulative old man he is. And I don't think I've ver seen a fic where Amelia was presented as she is here, and i believe it has great potential for her character. Now all that remains is that Harry doesn't turn all Mr. Nice Guy and trusting Dumbles with everything.
     
  17. Malice?

    Malice? First Year

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2006
    Messages:
    29
    Style change

    Hey guys, just posted a new chapter tonight and I've tried out a new style in it. fairly flash back heavy in a more first person view point than I've done in the past. If anyone gets a chance to read it mind telling me what you think of the style. good? shitty? something inbetween?
     
  18. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

    Joined:
    Nov 14, 2005
    Messages:
    2,921
    Still a great story.

    Harry WAS acting way too impulsive when he charged Azkaban with total of 5 minutes of planing, but I guess now he'll have to join forces with Bella and maybe even Hermione (I'd like to see what the crazy bitch is capable of). Amelia was great as ever, this characterisation of her is totaly orriginal and refreshing (she's always this Marry-Sue super-auror without a fault).

    As for the new writing style, I was never much for flashbacks, but as long as they have something to do with the present plot, I guess I can live with them.
     
  19. CGB

    CGB Auror

    Joined:
    May 7, 2006
    Messages:
    644
    Location:
    Germany
    I totally agree with ip. It'll interesting to read how the whole Dark Magic will affect Harry. Will he eventually become an evil and insane Dark Lord or will he somehow escape this fate? Another interesting thing is Snape. How exactly killed he the Dark Lord and why this urgent need to kill Harry? As for the flashbacks... well so long as they don't appear that often it's OK for me.
     
  20. Amerision

    Amerision Galactic Sheep Emperor DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2006
    Messages:
    2,541
    Location:
    The Gardens in the Desert Sand
    Is anyone good in this fic?

    It seems like everyone is a Slytherin tried and true.

    I love Amelia Bones especially. Everyone portrays her as good.

    And Yes.

    -----------------------
    |AMERISION APPROVED|
    -----------------------
     
Loading...