Now Hiring: Committee for the Disposal of Dangerous Creatures by nonjon - M

[nonjon]

Title: Now Hiring: Committee for the Disposal of Dangerous Creatures
Author: nonjon
Rating: M
Genre: Humor/General
DLP Category: Humor/Parody or General Fics
Status: Complete/One-Shot
Pairing: None
Summary: One-Shot. Post-Ootp. The summer after Harry's fifth year, Albus Dumbledore, newly reinstated Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot, must deal with an interesting end to a boring day.
Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3292245/1/

I assigned this "General" on fanfiction.net but a large number of reviews have called it hilarious, so maybe I should've considered it Humor. I just thought it was a nifty idea, not a terribly funny fic. Either way.

This was just a plot bunny that I want to throw out for others to use. It's a nice premise that could be worked into all sorts of fics. Rather than simply pitch it, I wrote this one-shot demonstrating the idea and one way to implement it.

But anyone who wants to borrow this idea for their own purposes, please feel free. The brainstorm for it was partially thinking up a "legal" defense for casting Cruciatus on Bellatrix but you could have some fun with the legal implications and the ramifications among the Dark Lord's forces and methods.

[the-caitiff]

Now that is a slytherin Harry. It was pretty funny, and I'm glad to see you're still in the humor game. 4/5

[Shezza]

Oh, that was gold. Pure genius on Harry's part. For a moment I was worried that Lucius was acting on his behalf, redeeming himself, but when the Imperius Curse came up, I immediately thought "Harry."
You've done the world a service Nonjon, for demonstrating an effective technique for removing a "Muggle-wand" of a slimy piece-of-Malfoy. I only hope that "Lucius" managed to do the same to his spawn.

5/5 for pure genius.

[Belgarion213]

WIth how gullabe Draco is in some of Nonjons work I would not be surprised if 'Lucious' told him that when he joined the Dark Lord he would receive a larger 'wand' and he was only removing the current one so Draco could be eligable. Or something.

Great fic, loved it.

[Kari Black]

Oh, this was hilarious (and a very good & original idea).

5/5

[Nexus]

It was amusing till the last point where I lol'ed. Be wevy wevy quiet. :D

4/5 nonjon.

[slasheh]

as i said in the review this was just too funny. Imagine lucius standing in the wizengamot and asking for a penis-vanishing spell.....

[DreamRed]

Heheh, I rather liked this. The idea and execution were just so neat that you find yourself grinning at your computer screen and clicking the 5/5 button.

[Anarual]

Hillarious !!! One of the Best comedy fics i read for a long time ;]

[Swimdraconian]

It was the bounty hunting part for me that made the whole fic kickass. 5/5!

[Void Sorcerer]

As I said in my review Nonjon, good job man. You portraid(sp?) the characters attitude right, and came up with a twist on making the unforgivables legal!!!
It certainly wasn't nearly as funny as your other works, but it did have me chuckle at a few points, and like you said yourself it wasn't meant to be that funny.

Keep up the good work man, I look forward to your other stories.

4.5/5

[ofthedepths]

I loved it best comedy ive read in a long time

espeacially the "potter crossbow of doom"

[Wasteland]

Brilliant 4.5/5

[BlueMagikMarker]

kekeke, I love you nonjon!
5/5, though the beginning was a little weak. Once it got going it was hilarious (whether you wanted it to be or not!)

[Aekiel]

Loved it! Fucking hilarious it was. Look forward to any spin offs made from it.

[DarthBill]

Very nice. They picked a hard first target, though. Bellatrix is never out in public (what, with being wanted and all).

4/5

[SushiZ]

A great one-shot. A great job 5/5.

[The Heir]

I was confused as hell until the end, and then I couldn't stop laughing my bloody ass off. Cheers that was brilliant!

[Iztiak]

I really like this story, I think that you should write some hunting fics.
It's a hilarious story. 5/5

[Verminard]

Most enjoyable, like your other stuff.

[Zoopsa]

Maybe not nonjon's best work but I hold him to a higher standard.
Still a very good story.