1. DLP Flash Christmas Competition + Writing Marathon 2024!

    Competition topic: Magical New Year!

    Marathon goal? Crank out words!

    Check the marathon thread or competition thread for details.

    Dismiss Notice
  2. Hi there, Guest

    Only registered users can really experience what DLP has to offer. Many forums are only accessible if you have an account. Why don't you register?
    Dismiss Notice
  3. Introducing for your Perusing Pleasure

    New Thread Thursday
    +
    Shit Post Sunday

    READ ME
    Dismiss Notice

Abandoned The Terran Ascension by EvilKender - SG1 - M

Discussion in 'The Alternates' started by Phoenix-nl-, Dec 19, 2006.

  1. Phoenix-nl-

    Phoenix-nl- Muggle

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2006
    Messages:
    3
    Title: The Terran Ascension
    Author: EvilKender
    Rating: m
    Genre: Sci-Fi/Action/Adventure
    DLP Category: crossover / something else
    Pairing: not yet
    Status: Abandoned
    Summary: [HPxSG1]When Harry Potter finds The Chamber of Merlin within the halls of Hogwarts the future of Earth will never be the same.
    Storie begins with the explaining of atlantis and camelot and there relation to the Stargate. Sg1 is not in the storie yet.
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3295571/1/
    Link: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ekenderfanfiction/files/The Graveyard/Terran Ascension/


    Checked by Minion, December 25, 2012
    Kendercleric removed his stories from ff.net, but this one can still be found in his yahoo group (see link above).
    Another author adopted the story (apparently approved by Kender): http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3421384/1/The-Terran-Ascension
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 25, 2012
  2. Zevrillion

    Zevrillion Founder Retired Staff

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2005
    Messages:
    753
    Location:
    New Zealand
    3/5 at best. It’s not bad, but right now the only thing that’s holding it up is that it’s a Stargate crossover, otherwise it just seems to be a superpower Harry with ascended powers.
    <o></o>
    Hopefully that will not be the case and we will have a plot too.
     
  3. Shezza

    Shezza Renegade 4 Life DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Dec 12, 2005
    Messages:
    1,342
    Location:
    Australia
    I'll give it a 5/5 because it's off to a good start and the writer seems to know what he's doing. I love these sort of crossovers, although I can see why many people can't. It's obviously going to become a Stargate story with Harry Potter in it- but the potential for that looks great and I have no qualms with it.
     
  4. Amadan

    Amadan Second Year

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2006
    Messages:
    79
    Location:
    England
    I liked the story but as Zevrillion said it's mainly because it's a Stargate crossover. 3.5/5
     
  5. Brooklynight

    Brooklynight Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2006
    Messages:
    295
    Location:
    New York
    The Harry Potter side of this story seems mediocre at best so far. The writting isn't great. A few of the seens are written rather well and with witt. Other particularly the dual and stargate universe discovery seemed predictable and cookie cutter. This story might be enjoyable to a stargate fan but that about it. The future of the story really depends on what the author dose with the plot from this point forward.

    2.5/5 so far
     
  6. MrINBN

    MrINBN Unspeakable

    Joined:
    Jun 3, 2005
    Messages:
    754
    Location:
    Portland, OR
    2/5 and I'm being generous. The plot's nothing original, the whole story feels rushed and there's a BIG timeskip. That irritated me, and coupling that with the fact that Harry "just happens" to run into SG1 in the middle of a Honduras jungle is a big NO.
     
  7. Jon

    Jon The Demon Mayor Admin DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2006
    Messages:
    8,014
    Location:
    Australia
    I had assumed that we would see some Stargate Adventures... but they just went straight back to the Potterverse. To be fair I got up to where the Death Eater's gotThe Shield devices... and then I CTRL+W'ed I like the idea of harry being in both alot, it is fascinating, but mixing the enemies of the two just doesn't feel right to me.

    3/5

    Zev! One day I'll catch you when you're on and say Hi, I will! One day! One day!
     
  8. Xenon

    Xenon Professor

    Joined:
    Jun 15, 2006
    Messages:
    440
    Location:
    Lurk-Dome
    Well to be honest, its not that good. Some what original plot, but the huge time skip degrades the overall quality of the fic. Not to mention the poorly constructed plot device used to justify Harry's actions. The story makes it seem like he sat around angsting for a year before a light bulb suddenly appeared over his head. 'Hey, I'll absolve my guilt by getting a triple major and collecting alien artifacts for the good of mankind!'. I halfway expect him to break out a fedora and whip at some point.

    Although I found it entertaining, I wouldn't say its library material. 3/5
     
    Last edited: Dec 20, 2006
  9. Link

    Link Order Member DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2006
    Messages:
    846
    Location:
    China
    The beginning, in the castle of Hogwarts doesn't make much sense. A hidden corridor that was found first by Harry even though the castle was constructed a thousand years ago and no one else found it? But well, let's say it happens.

    Then, Merlin was lived way before the founders were born. He couldn't have possibly put this in Hogwarts. If this was located for example under Hogwarts in some kind of catacombs or something like that, it would make much more sense.

    But nevermind these fact. In Stargate, 9th season, Merlin didn't give to people simply knowledge like that. There were some tests, etc. It doesn't make sense Harry's getting so much knowledge and power without doing anything. He should prove himself 'worthy' of that by killing some hologram knights or Wizards for example.

    True power is achieved through hard work.

    It's still a good fanfiction. Well, there's not much for now, but it's not bad. Your grammar and spelling is fine. Not that I know much about it, but it's not painful to read.

    Well, for reader's comfort, paragraphs seems are a bit too long. Maybe it's because I'm tired right now, but I was lost a couple of times and had to read the paragraph from the beginning to find where I stopped reading.

    Edit: the Appendice and Author's note can't be separatly posted in Fanfiction.net; a moderator may remove the story at any moment.
     
    Last edited: Dec 20, 2006
  10. Lord Ravenclaw

    Lord Ravenclaw DLP Overlord Admin DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2005
    Messages:
    4,372
    Location:
    Denver, CO
    I'm liking it so far, but the length and full-chapter author-note piss me off. The time skip was epicly terrible and showed no indications of his training which would have enriched the story, and lacks details which would make a better story. 4/5
     
  11. Manatheron

    Manatheron Headmaster

    Joined:
    Dec 12, 2006
    Messages:
    1,166
    The 'Ancients' Have been cloning themselves remember? most of them probably could live 1200+ years.

    Well, I'm not certain whether or not to be annoyed. about this one. The 'fight scene' with ol Tommy-boy was frankly horrible, the authors notes were an annoyance more than anything else, and the plot needs to be expanded on...

    On the plus side, once the author bothered to explain, and flesh out his characters a little bit it wasn't too bad. In fact it's rather original in certain aspects. I'm thinking this is going to be Stargate+Hp rather than Magic+Stargate. Also if the author follows though with the premise he's set up, the moment harry leaves earth he will no longer be able to manipulate magic as the 'Atmosphere' of the other planets will shield them from the ambient energy getting though...

    I'd say 3ish
     
  12. TheIllusiveOne

    TheIllusiveOne Raptured to Hell

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2005
    Messages:
    624
    Location:
    Los Angeles
    This would be better if Harry wasn't a completely unlikeable retard. I wanted to like this, but I just couldn't. 2.5/5
     
  13. Skeletaure

    Skeletaure Magical Core Enthusiast ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Mar 5, 2006
    Messages:
    2,812
    Location:
    United Kingdom
    High Score:
    13,152
    I like it: most SG1/Hp crossovers go like this: Harry gets kidnapped by aliens and grows up on another word, Harry discovers his powers, Harry ascends to the position of a war leader, at some point returning to earth and finding out about his heritage along the way.

    And this story is completely different. Admittedly, the way the author skipped over so much in a rush to get rid of Voldemort was annoying, but the Voldemort storyline is just, as it says, the prologue. The real story is Harry as a relic hunter of alien technology on earth which is, I think, a cool idea and one never done before.

    Add that to a decent writing style and chapters of a good length and this gets:

    4/5
     
  14. carl

    carl Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Oct 25, 2006
    Messages:
    200
    Wrong it's the Asguard which clone themselves due to their inability to reproduce the natural way.
     
  15. Amadan

    Amadan Second Year

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2006
    Messages:
    79
    Location:
    England
    It's been updated again and now has a snippet of when he arrives at camalot.
    I get the feeling there will be alot of there "flashbacks" ,either way The timeline is getting confusing.
     
  16. Link

    Link Order Member DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2006
    Messages:
    846
    Location:
    China
    I think I see where he is going.

    As new chapters are coming, we will see little by little how Harry got this power to kill Voldemort and became a relic hunter, while the main plot is Harry hunting alien relics.

    I said "I think". Maybe that's not the case.
     
  17. RagefulLlama

    RagefulLlama Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Aug 10, 2005
    Messages:
    201
    Location:
    Calgary
    The author has discontinued all his stories leaving them open to be picked up by others as of a few days ago . . . disappointing . . .
     
  18. KenderCleric

    KenderCleric Lord of Plot Bunnies

    Joined:
    Nov 26, 2006
    Messages:
    652
    Location:
    Terra Atlantus
    The new author for the story is JewelsGlow15 and her updated (and frankly better version) can be found here.
     
  19. Mordecai

    Mordecai Drunken Scotsman –§ Prestigious §– DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 11, 2005
    Messages:
    559
    Location:
    Englandshire
    High Score:
    5,725
    I like the fic, and I would agree that the new author has a better talent for writing. I think there will probably be an update fairly soon, since in an AN in the latest chapter, the author mentions having to split the chapter in two, due to its size.
     
  20. chelanxar

    chelanxar Squib

    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2007
    Messages:
    12
    darn. you beat me to it kender lol
     
Loading...