Title: The TriSchool Tournament
Author: DisobedienceWriter
Rating: K (I'm not sure if it should be labeled as such, though. It's more like Teen.)
Genre: Adventure
DLP Category: The Alternates
Pairing: None
Status: Work in Progress
Summary: One shot, AU of GOF. Here’s the story I wish I had found when I read GoF or GoF fanfiction. New, harder tasks. Observant!Smart!Harry. On the outs with Ron, Hermione, Dumbledore, and Hogwarts in general. No pairings.
Link: Fanfiction.net

It says it's a one-shot but he added a second chapter, so I'm not sure if that's out the window.

 

I only got about two pages in and couldn't read anymore. The author made no differenciation between Harry's vocabulary and Sirius'. Harry talked like Dumbledore! Then the author wipes out most of the plot line and twenty students instead of just Harry and Cedric are in this tournament. How is Harry any better or more special then the other nineteen students? Yes, he could do better on his tasks then the rest, but I can't see much else setting him apart.

The writing was weak, characterization OOC and flawed, and the general plot line of the story made me cringe. 1/5 for me.

 

Bashing-happy characterization and self-righteous political ranting were absolutely terrible, but the Triwizard tasks were pretty cool. Too bad there wasn't a better story to wrap them together.

 

Agreed. He had some good ideas, but his execution left something to be desired.

 

Yes. Liked his rendition of the tasks, but not the story a whole lot. Lol, I still remember the author's single, and self-promoting, post.

 

I like the tasks, yes. But even someone who is intelligent would not have made the assumptions and guesses that Harry immediately made. Poor characterization for the win.

 

The author delights in painting Harry as the only one with brain cells in the noggin. Makes for an amusing read, but a piss poor story.

2/5

 

The first chapter was ok, the tasks were good, but the complete bastardisation of the tournament was confusing and as far as i could see there was very little explanation of it, unless i skipped over a dull bit of dialogue that explained it.
I only made it around a third of the way through chapter 2, it was boring plain and simple.

 

The first chapter was actually quite good, at least this idea of tournament and competitions were... The second was actually kind of forced, didn't like it.

2/5

 

I'm gonna disagree with most here. I enjoyed this ficlet quite a bit. Like most of DisobedienceWriter's stuff it has moments of preachiness. And yes it was lacking in drama considering Harry was brilliant and could figure all of these things out, but everyone else in the world struggled.

For those missing the point, this fic is about a TriSchool Tournament, not the TriWizard Tournament. If it was the wizard, I think Harry might have tried harder but his animosity extends towards most of the school, so he didn't care about 'Hogwarts' glory.

I thought there were some very interesting and clever new tasks, far better than just about any GoF rewrites I've read. Harry didn't even participate in all the tasks with the way the author structured the TriSchool Tournament but we still get to observe them and see how Harry would have done them.

Overall it was pretty blasé character-bashing, and not a ton of drama, so for me it hinged on whether the tasks captured my interest and they definitely did.

The second "chapter" was a bit of a continuation and almost a second completely different one-shot. It was mildly interesting, but since Harry wasn't involved in the tournament and we were just trying to uncover the mystery of this new Dark Lord and wrap it all up real quick, it was pretty typical. It felt off the way Harry went from composed, lots of tutors, including dueling to a sort of scared and apprehensive Harry when he ambushed the guys in the bathroom. Still, an average to above average read for the second chapter.

Most people that have read and enjoyed DisobedienceWriter's other fics should enjoy this one. If you couldn't stand his other stuff, I can't see this one winning you over. And while it has many faults that appear to be dealbreakers for some members, I still liked it and will probably read it again. Somewhere between 3/5 and 4/5 for me, but I'll round up and say 4/5.

 

I don't know about that. I enjoyed Interview with the Slytherin Childe and A Bad Week at the Wizengamot, but there was just something about this that left me bored. There was just something about this Harry that made me not like his character.

He was arrogant, smarter than anyone in the wizarding world, and now seems to have the resources to travel the world and find imaginary dueling specialtists that know everything about one section. You'd think Voldemort would go and kill theses people if they existed before attempting to murder a ten year old child.

I enjoyed the premise, yes, but I found myself skipping through the diologue and even Harry's thought process because it was arrogant and boring. I would read the discription of the trischool tasks, and ignore everything else.

Chapter two was difficult to read because even the tasks weren't all that creative. It was go from 'this' place to 'this' place, and try not to die. I read it all, and the conclusion left me bored as well as any other place. Harry's unconstant logical thinking just left me bored.

Did I mention I was bored?

2.5/5 Very readable, but not something I would read if I had a choice of something else.

 

I'm not sure what to give this fic. I liked the first chapter, with the trials and Harry unusual attitude to Hogwarts. Almost every fic shows Hogwarts as a place he loves/feels at home etc... So this attitude was an interesting take. I also like the trials put forth and Harry's new found deductive skills. They were inventive and well thought out.

Having said that, I have to say that I found the entire second chapter boring and overly long. There was so little to grasp on to that I'm surprised that I didn't fall asleep. Plus the entire storyline on that second chapter was so poor.

I really think this should have stopped at chapter one. If that was the case I would give it a higher rating. As it is I give it 3/5

 

That sums it up imo. I usually like Disobedience's stories because they have a clever plot and hardly any redundancies. This is the opposite, especially the second chapter. The tasks are interesting, but that's the only saving grace of the story. Harry just comes across as an annoying, arrogant prat.

2/5 for the interesting tasks in the first chapter.