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Two Sides Of The Same Coin by Ten Toes - T

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by malaga, Sep 8, 2007.

  1. malaga

    malaga Auror

    Joined:
    Feb 14, 2007
    Messages:
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    Location:
    New Zealand
    Title: Two Sides Of The Same Coin
    Author: Ten Toes
    Rating: T
    Genre: General
    DLP Category: General Fics
    Pairing: None
    Status: WIP
    Summary: Petunia & Harry become a team, and Harry finds the wizarding world much earlier than anyone suspects. He hides his Slytherin self under the guise of a naive Gryffindor. He also hides the wizard friendships he made years before Hogwarts. AU
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3615871/1/

    I was nervous about posting this here, because Harry seemed to be staying muggle for a while. The latest chapter however, has him meeting with a wizard his age, and a wizarding group who is unaffiliated with Dumbledore watching him. The writing is highly enjoyable, and I haven't seen any blatant problems with spelling and grammar.
     
    Last edited: Sep 9, 2007
  2. Randeemy

    Randeemy Headmaster DLP Supporter

    Joined:
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    1,069
    Location:
    England
    Taken from the A/N before it even starts. The author sees Slytherin as sly and cunning more than ambitious and uses Crabbe and Goyle as evidence for that. That put me off reading the whole thing, what is sly and cunning about those two? I would say the delusions of grandeur and power offered by serving Voldemort show ambition to some degree.
     
  3. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

    Joined:
    Nov 14, 2005
    Messages:
    2,921
    I've been following tentatively for a while. Basically, Petunia and Harry start working together at fooling Vernon and changing Dudley, gradually shifting Harry's development towards Slytherin.

    The strongest point of the story is characterization. Petunia never becomes cuddly or even likes Harry very much. Vernon doesn't turn nice. Harry stays a kid, even if he's smart and sneaky. All refreshingly believable and detailed.

    Unfortunately, there are too many downsides: Poor writing (mixed up tenses), overabundance of words (certain side-features described in too many details) and generally slow, uneven and repetitive plot. Like malaga said, after 65K words, we're not even close to 1st September.

    Overall, a decent read, if you can look over its flaws.
     
  4. Rin

    Rin Oberstgruppenführer DLP Supporter

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    I've nevery understood how people get their tense/aspect/moods mixed up in writing. It seems like such an easy thing to fix just by coming back and reading one's own words out loud and saying "WTF?! That makes no sense!" Surely they don't SPEAK like that, do they?
     
  5. nonjon

    nonjon Alumni Retired Staff

    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2005
    Messages:
    2,129
    Shame on you malaga. You should know better than to post like that.

    Read the Sticky on posting format. You're not a newbie.

    And I wish everyone would remember to at least make their thread titles properly with "[TITLE] by [AUTHOR] - [RATING] (- optional bits: pairing, one-shot, crossover)"
     
  6. deathinapinkboa

    deathinapinkboa Minister of Magic

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Democratic Republic of The Congo
    Yes, I've been fallowing this for a while now. I find it generally enjoyable, but by no means great.

    That said, the chapter of Harry's fail London excusion bored me to tears. I wrote the auther a long review explain why sucked monkey tits, but (s)he didn't make any effort to fix it.

    I don't like it when authors make massive fuck-ups and then won't fix it.

    Personally I'd give it a 4/5, because I do enjoy reading it, but I think that for the average DLPer, it is more of a 3/5 fic.
     
  7. Marie M

    Marie M Raptured to Hell

    Joined:
    Mar 28, 2007
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    I enjoyed it, not enough to add to my alert list, but still...
    3.5/5
     
  8. Kai Shek

    Kai Shek Supreme Mugwump

    Joined:
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    1,706
    I enjoyed it greatly, but I can't explain why. Maybe due to the fact that its the best new story I have read all week, or that I read it after I read that SSS story. Either way, I enjoyed it, and was even going to leave a review for encouragement.

    3.5/5, with much room for improvement.
     
  9. Manatheron

    Manatheron Headmaster

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    1,166
    Please refer to the 'potter laws' section. At best those two will tolerate each other.
    Automatic 2/5

    I'd give it a 1, but I refuse to do that without reading it, and as I refuse to read it... {Shrugs}
     
  10. Kai Shek

    Kai Shek Supreme Mugwump

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    They are using eachother to get what they want themselves, thats hardly breaking the Potter Law.
     
  11. Manatheron

    Manatheron Headmaster

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    As I said, I haven't read it. I don't Intend to. If someone would kindly verify for me that Vernon and Dudley are at least still in character I will walk away happy without saying another word.
     
  12. Kai Shek

    Kai Shek Supreme Mugwump

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    Ahh, well, I will 'kindly' tell you that 'all' the characters are in character or very close to it.
     
    Last edited: Sep 14, 2007
  13. Andro

    Andro Master of Death DLP Supporter

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    It's... just not something that I would normally read. I did anyway, though only the beginning so far. Even though the characterization is good, it just lacks the epicness I look for in a fic. Interaction within the Dursley family is a steady enough beginning point, but when I know in advance that much of the story will involve it, it's just not interesting. There are several instances of wrong grammar, such as ploter instead of plotter. And that's just in the first chapter's title.
     
  14. Kai Shek

    Kai Shek Supreme Mugwump

    Joined:
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    Yeah, I'm not trying to say that its the perfect Fic ever, I was just a little bullshitted about someone attempting to put a review in the "for review" section without reading it or having anything useful to say(people seem to be doing that a lot).

    I enjoyed the story enough to put it on my alerts, so, I feel that that is saying much. Of course, I suck at grammar and spelling myself, so don't usually catch it when people make mistakes such as that. I mean, Ill catch it when someone spells wrong, as rong, but not plotter, as ploter.
     
  15. Manatheron

    Manatheron Headmaster

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    OK, Thanks.
     
  16. Rin

    Rin Oberstgruppenführer DLP Supporter

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    Hey, Kai Shek!

    I agree with you 100% here. I've been seeing a lot lately too is either "I'm too lazy to read the fic, but I'll give it a bad review anyway"; or, "My opinion is SO important that everyone simply MUST know that I do not intend to read this fic."

    I almost wish there were rules against both here. No posts to the effect of "I'll pass." Sadly, there's no way to enforce a policy of no reviews without reading. :wall:
     
  17. AnnF

    AnnF First Year

    Joined:
    Mar 2, 2007
    Messages:
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    I'm giving it 4/5. Though the next few chapters may change that entirely as Harry begins to enter the Wizarding World, and more OCs arrive.
     
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