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View Full Version : [Oneshot] Anything but Slytherin by IP82 - M (ONE SHOT)


ip82
05-21-2008, 05:58 PM
Title: Anything but Slytherin
Author: IP82 (me)
Genre: Drama/Horror/AU
DLP Category: Alternates
Ships: None
Rating: M
Published: May 21, 2008
Words: 3,500 (ONE SHOT)
Summary : How could have Harry's sorting ceremony looked like if the first war against Voldemort went down a bit differently.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4269983/1/
http://www.patronuscharm.net/s/122/1/

Just a quick oneshot, spurred from a image that popped in my head yesterday.


Checked by Minion, January 1, 2013

Mors
05-21-2008, 06:04 PM
Very dark. This would be an awesome setting for a later-era story where Voldemort returns. Bet some of the populace are chafing under this rule of "Light". Maybe even thinking, "Hey, the Death Eaters weren't so bad..."

And I lulz'd at Ron's noble ancestry.

Don E. Delivery
05-21-2008, 06:19 PM
That was splendid. I certainly think it should end where it did.

That was definitely 5/5.

Gabrinth
05-21-2008, 06:22 PM
Wonderful. 5/5 for a one shot. Definitely deserves to go in the library.

carvell
05-21-2008, 06:32 PM
McGonagall tapped the Hat with her wand, muting its words

Nice one you shut the bloody thing up, 8 out of 10 author's alway's write out that stupid song word for word.

As for this being a one-shot Harry saw an abused Draco being killed just for being a Slytherin this could be a good starting point for a dark Harry.

5/5

Memory King
05-21-2008, 06:42 PM
Definitely one of the best stories I've seen in a long while, mostly because of its quick pace, vivid imagery and unexpected characterisations.

Quite a few plot points could have been expanded, but it might be more beneficial to keep readers in suspense about them, all things considered.

The Wizard
05-21-2008, 06:47 PM
Masterfully done, and it ended perfectly.

5/5

EDIT: Lol, Banner came.

Dethklok
05-21-2008, 06:57 PM
I especially like Malfoy having to curse his parents. 'Curse on his black soul.' There's something insidious about that.

The Light won, but became in their own way worse than the Dark.

Nadino
05-21-2008, 07:19 PM
Nicely done, dude.
As someone said above, this would be a nice start of an AU story.
4/5

Banner
05-21-2008, 07:22 PM
* shaking *

5/5

Voice of the Nephilim
05-21-2008, 07:23 PM
Very well done, quite the disturbing thought that a child could have their livelihood ripped from them before they even reach their teens.

Interestingly enough, a very clear argument could be made that the world is a better place with Draco stuck as a squib. Having the actual dilemma elevates this story to a 5-star one.

LogrusMage
05-21-2008, 08:42 PM
4.9/5

...

I want this continued. So very, very badly.

Fucking awesome.

Humbolt
05-21-2008, 08:52 PM
This is masterful. 5/5 It was interesting to think that the Light could in a way be worse than Voldemort.

Andro
05-21-2008, 08:59 PM
The general concept is the only one that made me regret not coming up with it first.

Well done.

knothead
05-21-2008, 10:29 PM
It's a bit too over-the-top for my taste; however, the writing is very good and the concept is rarely used. 4.5 stars.

Iztiak
05-21-2008, 11:04 PM
It's a bit too over-the-top for my taste; however, the writing is very good and the concept is rarely used. 4.5 stars.

Rarely? Try "Never"...

Unless you've seen a story with a similar premise? If so, a link is needed immediately.

Back on topic: Awesome story, definitely for the library. 5/5 :D

Krogan
05-21-2008, 11:09 PM
This is a very interesting fic, I like the idea it presents about the light side going too far sort of like Lord Methene's fic but that whole magic stripping thing for Slytherin's was a touch over the top.

4.5/5 for me just cause I think the magic stripping chair was over the top

knothead
05-21-2008, 11:13 PM
Rarely? Try "Never"...

Unless you've seen a story with a similar premise? If so, a link is needed immediately.

Back on topic: Awesome story, definitely for the library. 5/5 :D

Shirley Jackson's classic short story "The Lottery" (http://www.classicshorts.com/stories/lotry.html) has a somewhat similar general concept. It was the first thing that came to my mind after I read IP82's piece.

yak
05-21-2008, 11:25 PM
I loved the nervous Hagrid, the blood lusting crowd, and the oppressive 'guardians'. The ambiguous ending with the hat was a good choice.

You've outdone yourself ip82.

HSRTG
05-21-2008, 11:29 PM
Warhammer 40k level xenophobia meets Harry Potter. I kind of wonder why the Sorting Hat didn't see anything related to the fate of the Slytherins though. It'd be fun to see a continuation of this, because I can't imagine a way for Voldemort to out-evil the Light Side. Without doing something nightmarish on the level of 40k itself, like submerging the planet in a Warp storm or something.

5/5.

Blaise
05-21-2008, 11:47 PM
Never thought I'd say this in a positive way, but: NO MOAR!!!

Perfect the way it is. 5/5

Demons In The Night
05-21-2008, 11:54 PM
This is masterful. 5/5 It was interesting to think that the Light could in a way be worse than Voldemort.Jesus fucking Christ, there is no such thing as the "Light". I hate it when fics just group everyone against Voldemort under "Light". It's cliched out the ass.

I haven't read the story yet, but I'm going to in a few minutes.

Darius
05-22-2008, 01:15 AM
Uh what? Light works fine. Calling themselves the light side works fine.

Wow that was amazing, I'd really like to see a story with that theme written.

Demons In The Night
05-22-2008, 01:35 AM
Uh what? Light works fine. Calling themselves the light side works fine.

Wow that was amazing, I'd really like to see a story with that theme written.I hope you're being facetious.

edit: 4/5. I liked it, but the massive OOCness, "Light" "Guardians of Light", etc, and the suspension of belief necessary to take it seriously, lowered it a point.

Too heavy handed. Not that I could do better writing a post war Oppressive!Ignorant!Prejudiced!Hypocritical!Minist ry, but I thought it was just way over the top. You could have gone about it much more subtly.

Darius
05-22-2008, 01:41 AM
I hope you're being facetious.

Enlighten me. What is wrong with that?

Demons In The Night
05-22-2008, 02:00 AM
Enlighten me. What is wrong with that?
1. It's incredibly cliche. The annoyance level is up there with Animagus!Elemental!MerlinSlytherinRavenclawHeir!En ormousInheritance!Harry
etc. You get the picture

2. It's not canon. "Light" is a fanon creation. Even JKR, whose plots are simple and child friendly, avoids blatant cliches as "Light and Dark", "Good and Evil", etc.

3. It's a giant over simplification. Yes, because all law abiding wizards share the same political/moral/ethical beliefs, ambitions, etc. We know from canon that there is nothing especially "Light" about the MoM and Dumbledore's group. The MoM exerts control over the media/press, suspends freedom of speech, uses the Unforgivables in times of war, tortures its prisoners with Dementors (who are probably the 'darkest' creatures in canon), no due process and habeas corpus, etc. I don't know exactly what's "Light" about that. DH made every Manipulative!Dumbledore fan/writer orgasm due to the numerous ways DD utterly fucked Harry over during the course of his life up until DH.

4. Did I mention it's cliche? Only about 150k out of the 300k fics on ff.net use the "Light side" nonsense.

There's probably more reasons why I hate it, but it's late and my brain is tired.

ip82
05-22-2008, 02:41 AM
Yes, "light" magic isn't canon, but neither are "wards" nor several other wildly spread concepts. With the verified existence of "dark" magic, I don't think it's such a stretch to assume the existence of its opposite, even if it isn't explicitly mentioned by JKR.

As for it being a cliche, well, split between light & dark, good VS evil has always been in the core of human philosophy. Take any religion, open any 'epic' book, play any video game and you'll find it there. Is it a cliche? Sure. But so is having your characters being influenced by gravity and falling in love.

As for the point no. 3, yes, I agree. There's no such thing as pure good or evil, true light and dark. But as philosophical asymptotes, sort of pure concepts characters are trying to aspire to, I have no problem with them.

And in the end, this story isn't really about the EXISTENCE of light and dark, it's about the society that BELIEVES in their existence. Muslim martyrs probably won't get a pack of virgins after their death, but that doesn't make their actions based on that belief any less real, does it?

Bucks
05-22-2008, 02:48 AM
I liked it. I would like to see it continued but the ending was great enough as it is. 4/5 because of OOC characters.

Demons In The Night
05-22-2008, 02:54 AM
Basically you're saying that the Wizarding world on a whole, is retarded (I agree). Bigotry and prejudice run wild. Those in power are most often corrupt. For every smart muggle born (like Hermione), there are 15 ignorant pure bloods.

It's a vicious cycle where those who have power conspire to attain more power, and to assure their power lasts generations, at the expense of the minorities, and progress.

Wizarding Britain is fucked to it's core. JKR really didn't do a good job of world building. She clearly didn't give much thought to the economy, the political system, etc, which you would expect to be laid out in detail in a 7 book series.

JCCS
05-22-2008, 03:33 AM
5/5

Awesome AU idea.

The Fine Balance
05-22-2008, 03:57 AM
Basically you're saying that the Wizarding world on a whole, is retarded (I agree). Bigotry and prejudice run wild. Those in power are most often corrupt. For every smart muggle born (like Hermione), there are 15 ignorant pure bloods.

How different is that from the real world? Granted its not as blatant, but that's due to the population differences.

On the story:

The best thing you've ever archived, IP. 5/5

ZanyMuggle
05-22-2008, 04:14 AM
5/5

Nuff said

ParseltonguePhoenix
05-22-2008, 04:31 AM
This was pretty interesting, ip. The idea that the light side have become fanatics and whatnot is pretty cool, especially when they're willing to kill Slytherins just for being sorted there. On the other hand, having Dumbledore condoning this just doesn't feel right. If you'd left him out (say he was killed in the war, maybe) this could be a 4.5/5...however, 4/5 for a good read that's not quite perfect.

scaryisntit
05-22-2008, 05:05 AM
I already left a review on FF.net. I'll leave it at that.

4.5/5

ArseNick
05-22-2008, 07:25 AM
Wow. Epic wow. I must say, IP, that this story of yours is like a million miles above your others. Awesomely written, god damned original, and frighteningly good. Really man, I wish you could make a novel-length fic outta this. That'd be truly worth reading.
5/5

deathinapinkboa
05-22-2008, 11:15 AM
I really liked it.

I read it last night, and I still feel slightly disturbed and upset.

There is one thing I really do not like though, and the is Dumbledore's existance in this fic. I would be completely comfortable with everything if Dumbledore had died, and thus the war had gone differently, but I don't like his current behavior.

He is one of those rare smart and power wizards, and I think he would be an effective and vocal voice against this behavior. Some special explination is needed if you want to have him in the fic.

The fist time I read it, my mind skipped over his existance, and without him it is a much more powerful read.

Still, that only looses you .1 stars. 4.9/5

Nukular Winter
05-22-2008, 11:31 AM
Basically you're saying that HUMAN BEINGS on a whole, ARE retarded (I agree). Bigotry and prejudice run wild. Those in power are most often corrupt.

It's a vicious cycle where those who have power conspire to attain more power, and to assure their power lasts generations, at the expense of the minorities, and progress.

Fixed that for you. It was hard for me to tell if you were being ironic, bitching about the "cliche" use of "Light Wizardry."

I have to conclude, sadly, that you completely missed the point. The only difference between Hogwarts under the "Light Guardians" and Hogwarts under the Carrows was the House chosen for persecution.

The moral of the story is that Fanaticism is Bad, no matter what the cause.

Spanks
05-22-2008, 01:04 PM
This should be a two shot ;) That way you can just skip to Harry's 7th year and we know how his life turned out in this dystopian wizarding world.

That one shot is a 5/5 hands down.

Banner
05-22-2008, 01:17 PM
This should be a two shot ;) That way you can just skip to Harry's 7th year and we know how his life turned out in this dystopian wizarding world.

That one shot is a 5/5 hands down.

The problem is that we don't know for sure that Harry actually wasn't sorted into Slytherin. The Hat said that it was going to stop considering the children's wishes, since no one wanted Sly house.

That story left me shaken and edgy from yesterday afternoon 'til nearly lunchtime today.

I'm even sorry (deeply sympathetic, in fact) for Draco - and no one is more surprise about it than I.

hchan1
05-22-2008, 02:32 PM
Thought-provoking, especially considering that the scenario the story presents is entirely plausible considering how ass-backwards the wizarding world is. Some OOC-ness here though - I can't see Dumbledore letting something like this spread, nevermind standing by and watching apathetically as it happens. 4.5/5

neren
05-22-2008, 03:11 PM
The will of the majority is stronger than the will of the minority. Even the mighty Dumbledore can't do much unless he causes a civil war.

Banner
05-22-2008, 03:23 PM
Thought-provoking, especially considering that the scenario the story presents is entirely plausible considering how ass-backwards the wizarding world is. Some OOC-ness here though - I can't see Dumbledore letting something like this spread, nevermind standing by and watching apathetically as it happens. 4.5/5

I see two possibilities.
Voldemort and/or his DE managed to do something to break Dumbledore's will, and the old man is nothing more than a puppet, or (a happier possibility)
the rejected children would be escorted out of the castle - without magic, they would have no reason to be there - and AD and Hagrid have established some sort of Underground Railroad to get them out of the country.

(it's the only way I can deal.)

ip82
05-22-2008, 03:25 PM
About Dumbledore: there was some discussion with my alphas whether to make him into the Minister (thus instigator of this light-obsessed world) or a helpless observer (by spiking up the 'sadness' part). In the end, I decided to leave his role a bit ambiguous. You can (or should be able to) interpret his short appearance and tacit approval of Malfoy's "banishment" however you wish.

My personal preference is that he started this Light sect, served as its figurehead for a while and then it sort of got out of his hands, leaving him a guilt-riddled observer of the hell he had created. But that's just me.

Naga's Shadow
05-22-2008, 03:33 PM
Very nice and very creepy. I hadn't thought that anything on DLP would have ever made me feel sorry for Draco. You have proved me wrong.
5/5

Vengashii
05-22-2008, 03:38 PM
Damn. I would love to read a continuation of this fic wherein there's a real bloody revolution. :D

Korisovra
05-22-2008, 06:57 PM
Damn. I would love to read a continuation of this fic wherein there's a real bloody revolution. :D

QFT. I'll give this one a 4/5

Darius
05-22-2008, 07:29 PM
1. It's incredibly cliche. The annoyance level is up there with Animagus!Elemental!MerlinSlytherinRavenclawHeir!En ormousInheritance!Harry
etc. You get the picture

2. It's not canon. "Light" is a fanon creation. Even JKR, whose plots are simple and child friendly, avoids blatant cliches as "Light and Dark", "Good and Evil", etc.

3. It's a giant over simplification. Yes, because all law abiding wizards share the same political/moral/ethical beliefs, ambitions, etc. We know from canon that there is nothing especially "Light" about the MoM and Dumbledore's group. The MoM exerts control over the media/press, suspends freedom of speech, uses the Unforgivables in times of war, tortures its prisoners with Dementors (who are probably the 'darkest' creatures in canon), no due process and habeas corpus, etc. I don't know exactly what's "Light" about that. DH made every Manipulative!Dumbledore fan/writer orgasm due to the numerous ways DD utterly fucked Harry over during the course of his life up until DH.

4. Did I mention it's cliche? Only about 150k out of the 300k fics on ff.net use the "Light side" nonsense.

There's probably more reasons why I hate it, but it's late and my brain is tired.

Ugh I hate that. "If lots of people use it, it must suck!" mentality.

I don't give a shit if something is canon or not. See IP82's post for that, I completely agree.

You'll notice it isn't all law abiding wizards. It's Order members.

And after winning against a Dark Lord I can see them classifying themselves as 'The Light'

Gabrinth
05-22-2008, 09:59 PM
1. It's incredibly cliche. The annoyance level is up there with Animagus!Elemental!MerlinSlytherinRavenclawHeir!En ormousInheritance!Harry
etc. You get the picture

2. It's not canon. "Light" is a fanon creation. Even JKR, whose plots are simple and child friendly, avoids blatant cliches as "Light and Dark", "Good and Evil", etc.

3. It's a giant over simplification. Yes, because all law abiding wizards share the same political/moral/ethical beliefs, ambitions, etc. We know from canon that there is nothing especially "Light" about the MoM and Dumbledore's group. The MoM exerts control over the media/press, suspends freedom of speech, uses the Unforgivables in times of war, tortures its prisoners with Dementors (who are probably the 'darkest' creatures in canon), no due process and habeas corpus, etc. I don't know exactly what's "Light" about that. DH made every Manipulative!Dumbledore fan/writer orgasm due to the numerous ways DD utterly fucked Harry over during the course of his life up until DH.

4. Did I mention it's cliche? Only about 150k out of the 300k fics on ff.net use the "Light side" nonsense.

There's probably more reasons why I hate it, but it's late and my brain is tired.

Mate, they are a group of fanatics- you know, psychos, loonies, fundamentalist Christians. They call themselves 'Guardians of the Light' (I think. I read it a bit back) in the same way that Bush calls the war, 'The War on Terror.'

Both are rather ambiguous, open-ended, emotionally stimulating terms that really mean nothing in the long run. But a group of fanatics use them to make their actions seem reasonable.

It wasn't the old, worn 'Good guys use phoenixes and bad guys use DARK phoenixes' cliche.

rj_stone2
05-23-2008, 12:20 AM
It wasn't the old, worn 'Good guys use phoenixes and bad guys use DARK phoenixes' cliche.
Let's not forget that bad guys use the killing curse and good guys use reducto.

"Light" is only lame when it's endorsed by the narrative of the fic. Having it adopted by the characters as propaganda is not at all cliche, and is actually pretty sweet. Great one-shot.

The ironic thing is that this is actually the logical ending place for a lot of the mediocre indy-Harry stories out there.

mjc
05-23-2008, 05:55 AM
Well, there is one less Horcrux to worry about...or is there?

Awfully short sighted of the 'winners', don't you think?

Let's just forcibly reduce an already low population by about 1/4...(not quite, because some snakes will go to other houses). I can't see a group that would do what they are doing to children allowing them to grow up and 'breed'.

I would put Dumbledore on the sidelines, he may have started it, but if Crouch is Minister, then I can see this as being a very possible scenario.

Also, I can see why the ending point is great...but I think this could make a really good short fic...5-10 chapters. No need to do a total canon redo or anything, but...

Merrill II
05-23-2008, 10:27 PM
http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y21/Helvius/bpw5.jpg

maidros
05-24-2008, 01:53 AM
Excellent story with compelling horror tones in it. Full marks.

5/5

Regards,
Maidros

thapagan
05-24-2008, 03:36 AM
As for a second chapter, Harry and Hagrid's first tea party?

It would be hard to top what has been written, but it could be fun.

Or not?

Methene
05-24-2008, 06:55 AM
Excellent premise, showing that there is more to the Wizarding world than the idiotic Gryffindor good, Slytherin bad concept introduced by JKR. This works well as a one-shot, but could be expanded with more background and foreshadowing of events.

5/5 from me.

Ikaros Mephisto
05-24-2008, 05:18 PM
I stay away from One-Shots on pure principle, usually. However, the amount of approval made me curious. So I took a peek. It took my fancy rather quickly, I must admit, though I was readily confused for a moment at McGonagall’s character. I suspended disbelief for a moment and found myself simply reading along.


Creepy.


As that was no doubt the point, it was very well done. The character whom I though remained mostly the same, was Ron. I always thought he and Draco were interchangeable and that Ron was always more of an ass. Glad to see his characterization in this one-shot agrees.


Light turns Dark.


I enjoyed it, gave me something to think about. I always enjoy reading what stimulates my creativity and you did it well. I don’t think you should take it further though. It’s brilliant as a one-shot, as a chaptered story I’m afraid it would lose its sparkle.


4.2 from me, It still lacks something... if it comes to me, I’ll edit the post.


Recommended and definitely your best work.

Lawyer in Exile
05-24-2008, 07:12 PM
5/5 for a shocking read, -1 for a few things already mentioned above = 4/5 - good one altogether.

XxEnvyxX
05-25-2008, 02:13 PM
Oh...to tell the truth, I was quite sick after I´ve read this.
(This is a good thing, because it means that the story has gone deep under my skin *shudder*)
My overproductive imagination worked overdrive and I couldn´t stop thinking about WW2 and other awfull things.
I love children and even if they can be nasty little monsters, they don´t deserve this. To destry them because of something they are or they parents have done...
What kind of sick world is this place...
They are just as bad as Voldemort.

Really well written, but if I got a Hogwarts letter, I would just say NO and go to Durmstrung or Salem or some other place far, far away.

Splendid Oneshot!
Original, well written etc.
5/5

Demons In The Night
05-26-2008, 03:18 AM
Oh...to tell the truth, I was quite sick after I´ve read this.
(This is a good thing, because it means that the story has gone deep under my skin *shudder*)


You got sick from reading this? WOW. This is pretty tame actually.

I hope you never read The Jungle, 1984, and other such literature. Or a few short stories ala The Pit and the Pendulum.

Korisovra
05-26-2008, 03:21 AM
No shit. I actually found this one quite tame, especially when measured against a few of the DLPérs work. As always IP82 delivered with a storyline that's different and helps weed out the wusses.

Taure
05-26-2008, 09:57 AM
No shit. I actually found this one quite tame, especially when measured against a few of the DLPérs work.

Much of the stuff on DLP has far more graphic violence and so forth, but I feel that this one shot proves that graphic =/= more disturbing. I've read a load of fics with torture and so forth in, and none of them got to me - they were just words on a page.

This one really manages to pull at the heart strings, though I think that it would have been more effective if Malfoy had been executed, since all the comparisons to an electric chair made me think that was what was coming, and so when he "only" lost his magic it seemed like he had got off lightly in comparison.

Banner
05-26-2008, 10:26 AM
@Taure:
They would never have been able to justify killing a little kid. Taking the magic from someone who will become a sociopath is one thing - pulling his teeth, so to speak (which is just stupid. The dangerous part is in his skull) but the population is just too small to prevent him from breeding. The plan is probably to keep the made-Sqibs downtrodden, and try to inculcate the next generation in Right Think.


Horror isn't necessarily gore. The realization that the Good Guys are mutilating small children still makes me flinch.

Taure
05-26-2008, 10:31 AM
They would never have been able to justify killing a little kid.

If they can justify taking his magic, they can justify killing him.

I find it ironic that the "Light" consider the taking away of magic to be punishment, considering that they're the ones who are supposed to think that Muggles are equal to wizards in worth.

ip82
05-26-2008, 10:50 AM
This one really manages to pull at the heart strings, though I think that it would have been more effective if Malfoy had been executed, since all the comparisons to an electric chair made me think that was what was coming, and so when he "only" lost his magic it seemed like he had got off lightly in comparison.

Execution was my original idea too, but in the end, it just seemed way too overblown. As it is now, IMO this story demands an average effort at suspension of disbelief from its readers. Adding Malfoy's decapitated head rolling from the guillotine to under the first years' feet would have only turned it into a grotesque parody - something I didn't want to do at any cost.

shadownin
05-26-2008, 03:19 PM
Great job.

It's a bit unrealistic but it was short so it wasn't hard to suspend disbelief.

4.5/5

mjc
05-26-2008, 03:31 PM
There is one thing I almost missed.

The Sorting Hat seems to be 'out of the loop'. It has absolutely no understanding at all of what is happening to those it sorts into Slytherin.

Methene
05-26-2008, 03:58 PM
There is one thing I almost missed.

The Sorting Hat seems to be 'out of the loop'. It has absolutely no understanding at all of what is happening to those it sorts into Slytherin.

Sorting hat does indeed seem to be completely out of loop with reality. However, considering it is at least as old as Hogwarts, it probably considers modern events and tidings as mere passing fancies and continues to do as it sees fit.

Taure
05-26-2008, 04:05 PM
I think IP82 changed the hat a bit from canon, and made it less sentient: just an enchanted hat that sorts students.

parselmaster
05-26-2008, 05:22 PM
Naw, if it wasn't sentient it would just have sorted them without any regard for their own prejudice. Whether or not it does that now just depends on how fed up it is. I would get fed up if everytime I tried to do my job people forced me to do it in a way they think it best. In this regard I think IP82 characterized the hat better.

Taure
05-26-2008, 07:46 PM
Naw, if it wasn't sentient it would just have sorted them without any regard for their own prejudice

What law of magic have we seen that says an enchanted item must be sentient to read your desires, but it doesn't need to be sentient to read your character?

None.

rj_stone2
05-26-2008, 08:58 PM
The ability to compose songs, hold a conversation, and remember past sortings is pretty good evidence of sentience. OTOH, it's kind of surprising no kid has managed to tell the hat that they're mutilating Slytherins.

Taure
05-26-2008, 09:12 PM
compose songs

In PS, Quirrell/Voldemort cast a Charm on a harp to play itself. I don't think any of us would say that the harp was sentient.

hold a conversation

You can have a conversation with a portrait, but they aren't sentient either: they are an echo, a memory. They are but the appearance of sentience.

remember past sortings

A portrait also has a "memory", but not sentience, as above.

SmileOfTheKill
05-26-2008, 09:46 PM
Or we can use the most simple solution for that hat.
If it was smart enough to notice what everyone was doing, it would not sort people into a house that would get the students punished by the general student body.
Smart hat = Bad for the plot

However all of what we say is junk until IP82 tells us his reason.

ip82
05-27-2008, 02:00 AM
Occam's razor about the Hat issue: the Ministry messed with it. By the way Crouch had confounded another sentient object designed to sort out children by some characteristic, we can speculate that it's not all that hard to do.

And yes, as Taure said, this Hat obviously can't read memories; it determines the house by some other characteristic, or puts the kid's subconsciousness through an obstacle course or something like that.

The Wizard
05-27-2008, 10:13 AM
The ability to compose songs, hold a conversation, and remember past sortings is pretty good evidence of sentience.
I disagree quite strongly. After all, U2 have sold millions of albums. :p

Dark Belra
05-27-2008, 02:16 PM
Damn, that story was unnerving... Is that the word?

I disagree quite strongly. After all, U2 have sold millions of albums. :p

He is the biggest shit in existence!

Orm Embar
06-08-2008, 02:47 AM
That was a very, very entertaining oneshot, depicting how the "Light" side could actually wind up being just as oppressive as rule under Voldemort. I got a kick out of Ron's noble ancestry. Is it just me, or did he take on a vaguely Draco-esque personality under the new circumstances, what with all of his bragging about his heritage and handing out facts?

Korisovra
06-08-2008, 02:59 AM
We all always knew that he would be. Even in canon. he's a poor mans Draco, without the money or the prestige to be cocky about well.....anything.

Rin
06-08-2008, 07:59 PM
We all always knew that he would be. Even in canon. he's a poor mans Draco, without the money or the prestige to be cocky about well.....anything.

People have been cocky about much less. After all, that's the entire basis of racism and any other -ism out there that exists. "I'm better than those people by virtue of possessing non-controlable characteristic X." All it takes is a group of people to agree with your position to reinforce it.

XxEnvyxX
06-11-2008, 03:44 PM
No shit. I actually found this one quite tame, especially when measured against a few of the DLPérs work. As always IP82 delivered with a storyline that's different and helps weed out the wusses.

I hate the idea for being so brutal to kids...but maybe it is worse because my baby brother is nearly in this age...
The same happened with Pet Cemetery by King when he was so young.
I´ve read it again after some time and didn´t get the same feeling again,
right place, right time-thing.
You feel it more intensive if you can picture your loved ones in the positions of the characters.

EdenB
06-11-2008, 04:02 PM
3.5/5 if I had to give it a rating.

It's well written and interesting, while still raising a lot of questions. I can kind of imagine it happening since people and groups often seem to classify themselves as absolute good and their enemies as absolute evil.

FollowTheReaper
06-14-2008, 03:38 AM
4/5 simply because I feel generous

Sorrows
06-24-2008, 06:26 PM
I might be narcro-posting slightly, but damn did this creep me out.
But if the slytherins were all squibs then why were some of them still in the school? were they there only to learn magical theory?

Perfect the way it is.

However if it was continued I wonder what the reaction would be to Harry being a paslemouth?

Poytin
06-24-2008, 08:02 PM
I think that they would be apprenticed to Filch.

ip82
06-24-2008, 08:16 PM
They are not in school, there are only three house tables. I never reached that far, but I suppose all new 'Slytherins' are deported out of Hogwarts after the feast and sent into a muggle school of some sort.

Sorrows
06-24-2008, 09:01 PM
Wouldn't that leave them with little experience in wizard society? And there isn't relay enough of a magical population to cut the 'stock' by almost 1/4.
Apprentice them to the house elves:)

carvell
06-24-2008, 11:02 PM
I think that they would be apprenticed to Filch.

More like Hagrid, a trip into the forest and Aragog will have lots of fresh meat.

Erotic Adventures of S
06-26-2008, 09:49 AM
And there isn't relay enough of a magical population to cut the 'stock' by almost 1/4.


Blaise managed to change houses. I imagin it would only be the hardcore dark kids that dont change.

Othalan
06-27-2008, 05:11 PM
Very interesting. I like the idea of the "Light" side going hardcore after getting their asses handed to them for years because they were being "noble" and "righteous" (meaning: stupid). Can't say I find the premise entirely believable. All Slytherin students? I guess Voldemort was one, but surely not all of his Death Munchers were? I could definitely see the persecution of Death Eater children happening, but ALL Slytherins?

That aside, I did like how the author left the interpretation of the ending up to the reader. 4/5