Mastermind Hunting by Louis IX - T

RagefulLlama · 11-04-2005, 01:52 AM

Title: Mastermind Hunting
Author: Louis IX
Rating: T
Category: Action/Adventure
Status: Writing In Progress
Summary: [AU, precanon] Dumbledore should have checked on Harry during his childhood. Now, he seems to have disappeared with the Dursleys. What about his education? Will he accept his legacy? Does he even know about it? What are those muggles doing in the picture?

Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2428341/1/

I enjoy this one although it can get a bit dry and slow at some parts. A lot of research incorporating it into historical events. Give it a try if you have a decent amount of time on your hands it's pretty long.

Burt · 11-04-2005, 05:43 AM

Very long, and with no end in sight.

Still, it's a good read. Some parts are a bit cliche (kung fu, sword fighting, Merlin's wand which überfies everything, etc.), but that's made up for with the dozens of completely new (at least to me) ideas incorporated into this story. Lots of interaction with the muggleworld in the earlier chapers (until Harry goes to Hogwarts -- then he suddenly stops caring about muggleland).

Harry's a bit too powerful, and some things don't make sence (like, he forms a friendship with Ron and Hermione, and even though he acts like fifty years older than he is, he thinks of them as equals... Ron becomes Gryffindor Keeper... Malfoy becomes Slytherin Team Captain as a second year (which, while having a decent enough explanation, still blows)... Harry licks Dumbly's balls... Harry cares that Sirius and Remus knew his parents (which doesn't sound so bad out of context, but the Harry in this story really shouldn't care)... etc...)

The most ickie part, though -- the Dersley's are nice. In fact... they're really nice. Hell, I'd go as far as to say that they're good people... It's sickening. Almost as sickening as the gross amount of parentheses used in this post.

As I said, though, it's got enough nice origional twists to make it worth reading, and I do love how it incorporates modern history. Despite the annoying bits, I do recomend it.

Miss Selarne · 11-04-2005, 04:00 PM

I think its ok. A bit long though. I think its on the 20th chapter and I can't read the whole chapter in one sitting. I'm about halfway through 20. There are some cliches, well a bunch, but I think its one of the better stories. Basically, its cliche-filled but overall good.

Giovanni · 11-04-2005, 07:41 PM

Louis IX is an interesting writer... I can't say I am a big fan of their work... Its far to detailed and the plots take to long to develope, to many wasted words/cliches.... etc.

HOWEVER.

All said, the parts of this fic I read I liked. To slow moving though.

Sree · 11-04-2005, 09:13 PM

After that one part, where Harry is in a plane with the witch and wizard, and all those gods appear and shit, I stopped reading. Mostly because it got way too complicated.

Kaotac · 11-04-2005, 11:02 PM

That was only for mybe.. 5% of the chapter, and it isn't really mentioned much after that, at least not yet. I expect it will have a place in killing Volde, though.
Anyway, I liked this story, though it can get a bit repetitive at some places.

Dark Syaoran · 11-05-2005, 02:43 AM

I've been watching this one but really since he's come into the magical world its been kinda shitty. The wands he have irk me. I just dont like the fact he has Merlin's wand.

Hermione is way too smart at her age. It's completely whack. She isnt even this smart in the books when shes a few years older.

There is more but I cant be fucked ranting anymore.

The muggle world part was good but then its gone to shit now.

ip82 · 12-02-2005, 04:29 AM

I've just read the whole thing (it took me few days) and my final impressions are very good, although there were letdowns and stupid parts throughout this story.

First part is absolutely the best. Harry discovering his powers, secret agents, traveling the world, searching for the missing family... Not many authors do this - have Harry go to other contries and meet other cultures. It sure as hell takes more research and dedication to write something like this, than another Hogwarts-centric fluffy romance.

Second part is somewhat trippy - Gods, particle accelerators, seer, virtual reality, incorporal beings... Confusing but interesting and original nontheless.

Then comes the biggest dissapointmernt - after all the traveling and different schools Harry had heard off, he goes to fucking Hogwarts. Even worse, the plot there vaguely follows HP books 1 & 2. Furthermore, Harry somehow forgets that he can extract knowledge or change other people's personallity. With all his powers, he still lets Snape and Malfoy walk over him. And then there's that whole shit where he reveals his identity to his friends and teaches them occlumency... bah.

I'm not saying this is written badly, it's just that there are million other stories doing something like this, but only few with world travel and other schools.

The second year gets better - there is less canon stuff and more spies and travelling. This part balances traveling the world, going to school and fighting with Voldemort rather nicely.

General downside of the whole fic is bad characterisation. There are a lot OC's but we almost never see them make any kind of decision or present their own oppinion. Here are included the Dursleys, various OC's around the world and Harry's friends in Hogwarts - none of them have any character or free will whatsoever. It's like they are just Harry's badgage, making appearances when neccesary for the plot and then dissapearing amongst Harry's other obbidient followers. He's just 11, damn it! Why would his parents and seasoned spies follow his every command?
Only Dumbledore, Snape and Malfoy's characters are developed, with their own agendas and complex characterisation.

The biggest upside is that we finally see something other than Hogwarts and England in one HP story. Many people are posting challenges and plot-bunnies where Harry travels the world and learns magic, but few authors are good and dedicated enough to write them. The effort that Louis IX had invested in research of different cultures and contries for this story is truly commendable.

Also, Harry's powers are great too. It's good to see Harry as ultra-powerful legilimens/occlumens, who's (generally) not reluctant to use his powers for "moral reasons" or some shit like that. Martial arts, swords and super-wands are overused, but I didn't mind them that much, coz they are explained nicely.

To conclude, this story IS sort of a rollercoaster ride of quality, but the final results are still great in my book. And the story is very active too.

ip82 · 01-09-2006, 02:12 PM

This story had just officialy made it into my top-5 list of best active stories. Powerful and smart Harry, new magical concepts, traveling around the globe AND FUCKING 400,000+ words to boot... Can't get much better than that.

**TheIllusiveOne** · 01-09-2006, 07:53 PM

I stopped reading when Harry got his ass beat by Draco fucking Malfoy in the Karate tournament.

ip82 · 01-09-2006, 07:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheIllusiveOne

I stopped reading when Harry got his ass beat by Draco fucking Malfoy in the Karate tournament.

Oh, come on, that was like AGES ago. Harry's fart would now blow fucking Malfoy away...

**TheIllusiveOne** · 01-09-2006, 08:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ip82

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheIllusiveOne

I stopped reading when Harry got his ass beat by Draco fucking Malfoy in the Karate tournament.

Oh, come on, that was like AGES ago. Harry's fart would now blow fucking Malfoy away...

Still... That's something you never recover from.

Sree · 01-09-2006, 10:03 PM

Malfoy was cheating...and Harry still almost beat him. That part was fine in my opinion. My biggest complaint about this story was that there were way too many OC's. They were just hastily thrown in there and I feel some of them should have been secondary characters that we rarely hear from.

ip82 · 01-09-2006, 10:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sree

Malfoy was cheating...and Harry still almost beat him. That part was fine in my opinion. My biggest complaint about this story was that there were way too many OC's. They were just hastily thrown in there and I feel some of them should have been secondary characters that we rarely hear from.

Agreed. He's pushing them in the background now, though. They show up now or then, but the biggest accent now is on the war between Harry, the order and Voldemort.

Lord Osiris · 01-09-2006, 10:40 PM

Im up to the part where he just recieved his wands and well im a bit sceptical of the story as it's becoming a bit coo-coo funny, does it get better?

LT2000 · 01-09-2006, 10:47 PM

I'm skeptical about the author. I know he ships H/G from another work he wrote, so I'm reluctant to read this one. Malfoy doing martial arts is a bit...yeah. I should think that to be a Muggle thing, and not something a pureblood would be involved with.

ip82 · 01-09-2006, 10:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lord Osiris

Im up to the part where he just recieved his wands and well im a bit sceptical of the story as it's becoming a bit coo-coo funny, does it get better?

Yeah, I didn't like that part, but wands don't play a big part in the latter story. So many shit happened since than that I forgot all about that little detail.

ip82 · 01-09-2006, 10:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lord Serapheth

I'm skeptical about the author. I know he ships H/G from another work he wrote, so I'm reluctant to read this one. Malfoy doing martial arts is a bit...yeah. I should think that to be a Muggle thing, and not something a pureblood would be involved with.

It seems it'll be Harry/Tracey (Slytherin). Harry is friendly with Ginny but not overly so (she's more or less in the background).

As for Malfoy, that was just Lucius trying to discipline him. That part is like 1/1000 of the story and don't play some big role in the future (Malfoy never fights again). The part where Harry totally screws up Malfoy is beautiful, though...

Syn · 01-09-2006, 11:21 PM

i really enjoyed how cerebral the story is/was...

but the plot just seemed to get so convoluted that my extremely non-ADD ass couldn't follow it. or, didn't want to follow it.

ChuckDaTruck · 01-09-2006, 11:24 PM

Yeah. There is a Demi-God somehow involved? And Harry was blind?

THis story feels REALLY poorly planned with some interesting ideas. Anything unneccessary to the story though, should have been removed.

11-04-2005, 01:52 AM	#1
RagefulLlama Fifth Year Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Calgary Age: 24 Posts: 192	Mastermind Hunting by Louis IX - T Title: Mastermind Hunting Author: Louis IX Rating: T Category: Action/Adventure Status: Writing In Progress Summary: [AU, precanon] Dumbledore should have checked on Harry during his childhood. Now, he seems to have disappeared with the Dursleys. What about his education? Will he accept his legacy? Does he even know about it? What are those muggles doing in the picture? Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2428341/1/ I enjoy this one although it can get a bit dry and slow at some parts. A lot of research incorporating it into historical events. Give it a try if you have a decent amount of time on your hands it's pretty long. __________________ Suicide is a way of telling God: ''You can't fire me, I QUIT!''

11-04-2005, 05:43 AM	#2
Burt Second Year Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Santa Cruz, California Age: 22 Gender: Male Posts: 95	Very long, and with no end in sight. Still, it's a good read. Some parts are a bit cliche (kung fu, sword fighting, Merlin's wand which überfies everything, etc.), but that's made up for with the dozens of completely new (at least to me) ideas incorporated into this story. Lots of interaction with the muggleworld in the earlier chapers (until Harry goes to Hogwarts -- then he suddenly stops caring about muggleland). Harry's a bit too powerful, and some things don't make sence (like, he forms a friendship with Ron and Hermione, and even though he acts like fifty years older than he is, he thinks of them as equals... Ron becomes Gryffindor Keeper... Malfoy becomes Slytherin Team Captain as a second year (which, while having a decent enough explanation, still blows)... Harry licks Dumbly's balls... Harry cares that Sirius and Remus knew his parents (which doesn't sound so bad out of context, but the Harry in this story really shouldn't care)... etc...) The most ickie part, though -- the Dersley's are nice. In fact... they're really nice. Hell, I'd go as far as to say that they're good people... It's sickening. Almost as sickening as the gross amount of parentheses used in this post. As I said, though, it's got enough nice origional twists to make it worth reading, and I do love how it incorporates modern history. Despite the annoying bits, I do recomend it. __________________ Arripanimam

11-04-2005, 09:13 PM	#5
Sree Super Moderator The Mothaflippin' Rhymenocerus Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: LA Age: 25 Gender: Male Posts: 4,406	After that one part, where Harry is in a plane with the witch and wizard, and all those gods appear and shit, I stopped reading. Mostly because it got way too complicated. __________________ I'm the mother flippin' Rhymenocerous My beats are fly and the birds are on my back And I'm horny I'm horny If you choose to proceed you will indeed concede Cos I hit you with my flow The Wild Rhino Stampede.

11-04-2005, 11:02 PM	#6
Kaotac First Year Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Lismore NSW Australia Age: 27 Posts: 53	That was only for mybe.. 5% of the chapter, and it isn't really mentioned much after that, at least not yet. I expect it will have a place in killing Volde, though. Anyway, I liked this story, though it can get a bit repetitive at some places. __________________ I have this idea for a FanFic. Harry is Transported to a world full of stick figures, and he comes across a new prophecy. \"SICK O'' THE MANIPULATOR, HE BECOMES THE MASTURBATOR. HE GRIPPED HIS WAND WAY TOO HARD, AND NOW HE PEES TO THE LEFT BY A YARD...\" Wait.. Wrong prophecy. Anyways, now he has to fight new evils to get to the Dark Lady.. the Naughty Sorceress. I call the story... Harry Potter and the Kingdom of Loathing. www.kingdomofloathing.com

11-05-2005, 02:43 AM	#7
Dark Syaoran Once and Future King Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: The Holy Grail Posts: 5,699	I've been watching this one but really since he's come into the magical world its been kinda shitty. The wands he have irk me. I just dont like the fact he has Merlin's wand. Hermione is way too smart at her age. It's completely whack. She isnt even this smart in the books when shes a few years older. There is more but I cant be fucked ranting anymore. The muggle world part was good but then its gone to shit now. __________________

11-04-2005, 04:00 PM	#3
Miss Selarne Fifth Year Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Dream Land Age: 20 Gender: Female Posts: 176	I think its ok. A bit long though. I think its on the 20th chapter and I can't read the whole chapter in one sitting. I'm about halfway through 20. There are some cliches, well a bunch, but I think its one of the better stories. Basically, its cliche-filled but overall good.

11-04-2005, 07:41 PM	#4
Giovanni God of Magic Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Gilligan's Island Gender: Male Posts: 7,220	Louis IX is an interesting writer... I can't say I am a big fan of their work... Its far to detailed and the plots take to long to develope, to many wasted words/cliches.... etc. HOWEVER. All said, the parts of this fic I read I liked. To slow moving though.

12-02-2005, 04:29 AM	#8
ip82 God of Magic Join Date: Nov 2005 Posts: 2,899	I've just read the whole thing (it took me few days) and my final impressions are very good, although there were letdowns and stupid parts throughout this story. First part is absolutely the best. Harry discovering his powers, secret agents, traveling the world, searching for the missing family... Not many authors do this - have Harry go to other contries and meet other cultures. It sure as hell takes more research and dedication to write something like this, than another Hogwarts-centric fluffy romance. Second part is somewhat trippy - Gods, particle accelerators, seer, virtual reality, incorporal beings... Confusing but interesting and original nontheless. Then comes the biggest dissapointmernt - after all the traveling and different schools Harry had heard off, he goes to fucking Hogwarts. Even worse, the plot there vaguely follows HP books 1 & 2. Furthermore, Harry somehow forgets that he can extract knowledge or change other people's personallity. With all his powers, he still lets Snape and Malfoy walk over him. And then there's that whole shit where he reveals his identity to his friends and teaches them occlumency... bah. I'm not saying this is written badly, it's just that there are million other stories doing something like this, but only few with world travel and other schools. The second year gets better - there is less canon stuff and more spies and travelling. This part balances traveling the world, going to school and fighting with Voldemort rather nicely. General downside of the whole fic is bad characterisation. There are a lot OC's but we almost never see them make any kind of decision or present their own oppinion. Here are included the Dursleys, various OC's around the world and Harry's friends in Hogwarts - none of them have any character or free will whatsoever. It's like they are just Harry's badgage, making appearances when neccesary for the plot and then dissapearing amongst Harry's other obbidient followers. He's just 11, damn it! Why would his parents and seasoned spies follow his every command? Only Dumbledore, Snape and Malfoy's characters are developed, with their own agendas and complex characterisation. The biggest upside is that we finally see something other than Hogwarts and England in one HP story. Many people are posting challenges and plot-bunnies where Harry travels the world and learns magic, but few authors are good and dedicated enough to write them. The effort that Louis IX had invested in research of different cultures and contries for this story is truly commendable. Also, Harry's powers are great too. It's good to see Harry as ultra-powerful legilimens/occlumens, who's (generally) not reluctant to use his powers for "moral reasons" or some shit like that. Martial arts, swords and super-wands are overused, but I didn't mind them that much, coz they are explained nicely. To conclude, this story IS sort of a rollercoaster ride of quality, but the final results are still great in my book. And the story is very active too. __________________ IP82 stories: Potter's Resistance 1: Breaking Ties -> DLP Thread Yin and Yang -> DLP Thread Ficwad Profile \|\| HP Recycle Bin \|\| Crap filter C2 Rule no. 1 - You do not talk about Alpha Fight Club...

01-09-2006, 02:12 PM	#9
ip82 God of Magic Join Date: Nov 2005 Posts: 2,899	This story had just officialy made it into my top-5 list of best active stories. Powerful and smart Harry, new magical concepts, traveling around the globe AND FUCKING 400,000+ words to boot... Can't get much better than that. __________________ IP82 stories: Potter's Resistance 1: Breaking Ties -> DLP Thread Yin and Yang -> DLP Thread Ficwad Profile \|\| HP Recycle Bin \|\| Crap filter C2 Rule no. 1 - You do not talk about Alpha Fight Club...

01-09-2006, 07:53 PM	#10
TheIllusiveOne Aborted Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Los Angeles Age: 24 Gender: Male Posts: 623	I stopped reading when Harry got his ass beat by Draco fucking Malfoy in the Karate tournament.

01-09-2006, 10:03 PM	#13
Sree Super Moderator The Mothaflippin' Rhymenocerus Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: LA Age: 25 Gender: Male Posts: 4,406	Malfoy was cheating...and Harry still almost beat him. That part was fine in my opinion. My biggest complaint about this story was that there were way too many OC's. They were just hastily thrown in there and I feel some of them should have been secondary characters that we rarely hear from. __________________ I'm the mother flippin' Rhymenocerous My beats are fly and the birds are on my back And I'm horny I'm horny If you choose to proceed you will indeed concede Cos I hit you with my flow The Wild Rhino Stampede.

01-09-2006, 10:40 PM	#15
Lord Osiris Minister of Magic Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: The land down under Age: 25 Gender: Male Posts: 677	Im up to the part where he just recieved his wands and well im a bit sceptical of the story as it's becoming a bit coo-coo funny, does it get better?

01-09-2006, 10:47 PM	#16
LT2000 God of Magic Join Date: Jun 2005 Gender: Male Posts: 1,927	I'm skeptical about the author. I know he ships H/G from another work he wrote, so I'm reluctant to read this one. Malfoy doing martial arts is a bit...yeah. I should think that to be a Muggle thing, and not something a pureblood would be involved with. __________________ If I died and went to Hell, it would take me a week to realize I wasn't at work.

01-09-2006, 11:21 PM	#19
Syn Third Year Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Chicago Posts: 130	i really enjoyed how cerebral the story is/was... but the plot just seemed to get so convoluted that my extremely non-ADD ass couldn't follow it. or, didn't want to follow it.

01-09-2006, 11:24 PM	#20
ChuckDaTruck Overlord Join Date: May 2005 Location: Inside YOUR closet. Go check. Age: 13 Gender: Male Posts: 1,768	Yeah. There is a Demi-God somehow involved? And Harry was blind? THis story feels REALLY poorly planned with some interesting ideas. Anything unneccessary to the story though, should have been removed. __________________ And the Salmon declared, "How would you feel if we ate YOUR caviar, human?!" Everyone likes the way their own farts smell. "I see," said the blind man to his deaf wife. "Hey, Now" - Howard Stern

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
Abandoned - Voldemort's Last Spell, by Louis IX - T	EsperJones	General Fics	27	02-18-2008 05:52 PM