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Republic
07-04-2012, 04:55 AM
Title: Naruto: Iron Soul
Author: PlaceholderName
Rating: T
Fandom: Naruto
Pairing: None so far
Summary: Not many people can manage to turn getting blown up and impaled into an advantage. Most people aren't Uzumaki Naruto! Follow Naruto's path as he becomes one with his Iron Soul.

Linkage (http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8157710/1/Naruto_Iron_Soul)

A gem amongst Naruto fanfics, this baby boasts many things. A divergence and subsequent ability that are, at least somewhat, original, very impressive characterisation of Naruto and those around him, boss!Third, the author isn't afraid to diverge from canon, and shows it. There will be no canon rehash shit.
Very good writing in general, which only amplifies the quality of this story by not providing annoying distraction and breaking immersion.

Easily a 4.5/5, with the rating possibly going up t 5/5 if the author continues like this.

Thoughts?

Owimbowé
07-04-2012, 05:18 AM
It's been a while since I've enjoyed a naruto fanfic to this extent. As said, the author isn't afraid to deviate from canon, but what stikes me the most is the fact that everything seems incredebly well thought-out, especially in terms of Naruto's "bloodline" and strenght. One of my few gripes is that I wished the author offered more scenes involving team nine and how they interact.

Edit: Oh and I found Sasuke's treatment a bit disproportionnal but it's outweighted somewhat by the new approaches it can bring.

Between a 4 and 4.5/5 can become a 5 in the long-run.

Sin Saiori
07-04-2012, 06:14 AM
More interactions would be nice, except most authors get bogged down in character interactions and forget they're writing a story with a plot.

I really want to give this story five big-ones, but with where the story is right now things could either get really good or really really bad. The author's done a wonderful job of breaking away from canon (both with character and plot development) and there have been a lot of changes, but I don't want this fic to end up as 'different for the sake of being different' and not actually worth anything in the end.

Tentative 4/5 with the potential for a bump up to 5.

Owimbowé
07-04-2012, 07:48 AM
Yeah I get what you mean. The author found a good balance, it's me nitpicking for the sake of nitpicking.

LT2000
07-04-2012, 08:36 AM
Just skimming the earlier chapters, but I would have much preferred if the author had stuck with a straight apprenticeship rather than shifting gears to put him on a team.

CheddarTrek
07-04-2012, 08:58 AM
I've been following this. I rate it at a 4/5 easily with potential to go up higher.

CrackedMind
07-04-2012, 10:35 AM
definite 4/5, with the recent chapters making me hopeful it'll go to 5/5. It has it's odd quirks that annoyed me at first (teacher/student rather than the Japanese counterpart), But it's grown on me.

Overall a rather enjoyable read.

nath1607
07-04-2012, 10:37 AM
I'm up to chapter 7 so far and I've been dissappointed. Have I just not gotten to the good parts yet or do you see something I don't?

knight504
07-04-2012, 10:49 AM
I'm up to chapter 7 so far and I've been dissappointed. Have I just not gotten to the good parts yet or do you see something I don't?
IMO, you haven't gotten to the good parts yet. I found the first part of the story to be fairly tedious to get through. Keep going.

I'll get around to posting an actual review at some point.

I Burn Water
07-05-2012, 06:33 AM
I got up to chapter 25, and it was only the glowing reviews it had received here that kept me that long. It's not bad exactly but it's just very boring. I don't care about any of the characters, there is no excitement, no suspense. I found myself completely uncaring about the health of the main characters during any of the fight scenes. It's good writing from a mechanical sense, but I was never really immersed.

3/5

hgf
07-05-2012, 10:26 AM
There were some parts I thought were stupid or childish and I was kind of annoyed by how easy everything seems to be for Naruto's team. I do understand they're skilled and have a rather large advantage with their weapons, Buyakugan and Naruto's iron thingy. Not to mention the Kyuubi, although I don't remember Naruto using it that much (at all?), other than the passive uses. I'd just like to see them take some real damage once in a while. I did like the fight scenes otherwise.

Regardless of the flaws I found myself clicking next chapter until there were no more chapters to read. For some reason this is really entertaining. I'll give it a 4/5.

Celestin
07-05-2012, 11:00 AM
I skimmed it and I must admit that the last chapter is a game changer, but the story as a whole didn't manage to win me over. It's about 3.5/5 rounded to 3/5 for me - not bad, but not good enough to keep me reading either.

CheddarTrek
07-05-2012, 11:09 AM
I am seeing a lot of the points made here. I didn't give an in-depth review myself earlier, but it'd be something along the lines of...

Regardless of the flaws I found myself clicking next chapter until there were no more chapters to read. For some reason this is really entertaining.

I liked some of the differences made; I was especially surprised at how much I liked Ebisu in this fic. He's not the powerhouse that Kakashi is, but he specializes in teaching, and he's still a good portion stronger than his charges are (for now). Though it does mean that I keep expecting him to get killed off at some point.

The Iron thing is... weird. I sort of wish it was toned down a bit, actually, but given that it's Naruto and the Kyuubi is involved and crazy shit *does* happen in the Narutoverse... well, it could be worse.

I thought characterizations were alright. They aren't the best that I've ever encountered but they are interesting. Naruto and the Hokage are close. Ebisu is as much a father figure as he is a mentor, at least at first. Tenten and Naruto are friends and Neji seems at least accepting of Naruto. They work well together, etc.

In hindsight I still think this is a solid 4/5, if only because I did want to keep reading and didn't finish til I got through the entirety of the posted chapters. But I'm no longer sure that it can edge into 5/5 territory later -- it's good, but it's not quite that good.

Howdy
07-05-2012, 11:15 PM
^^

I agree with most everything said here.

When I first started reading, I thought to myself, "how cool is it gonna be when Naruto can channel really strong wind chakra to any part of his body?" Then they author went with this whole iron element thing, which frankly I can't really figure out in my head. On top of that, the author is a little ninjutsu-happy. I remember reading how strong kid Naruto became after his change, and yet I can't really recall him doing any sort of taijutsu in his fights. It's all just metal this, metal that. Even the other members of his team seem incapable of doing anything but flashy ninjutsu, aside from maybe Ebisu.

Ebisu seems completely unrecognizable in this story, and every time I try to visualize him in a scene, I have to stop and think "who is this guy again?" His personality was completely lost in the first chapter he appears in. He's also a bit stronger than I'd expect the canon Ebisu to be. Very knowledgeable and a fount of wisdom for a young ninja he may be, but I could never imagine him doing anything more than getting tossed around like a rag doll in a fight (which we all recall he was).

I did enjoy that the author was brave enough to kill off Orochimaru so quickly, even though I sort of rolled my eyes at the method. On top of that I never really saw Hiruzen and Danzou's relationship to be quite so antagonistic, though the manga makes it very, very hard to tell.

Killing Gaara was a good move, I think, though again the ease with which it happened surprised me. If Naruto is already this powerful how can he realistically be challenged by anyone but the very strongest characters in the manga, even at this early stage? His abilities just seem a little too strong, and the author I think is tempering this by holding back Naruto's opponents.

I'm genuinely wondering if Naruto could just tank an opponent like Kiba all day long. Can a bladed weapon even hurt him now? Can any sort of physical attack?

CheddarTrek
07-05-2012, 11:52 PM
Ebisu's strength bothered me at first but it got better when he made his report and said that his enemy on the ship was... high-B rank? Or something like that. I can see Ebisu being at *that* level at least. Zabuza, who was S-rank, would have been a completely different story.

I do find myself wondering where the story is going though. I caught the foreshadowing where Naruto gives the Hokage some kind of metal location device he designed -- I guess that'll be used to teleport Naruto into some kind of situation where he can keep the Hokage from dying. Though granted Orochimaru is dead so perhaps not.

But I guess I'm not sure where the story is going. Are we just going to rehash canon with metal and a lot more dead antagonists? Or what?

Howdy
07-06-2012, 12:27 AM
Oh, I was also raging a little at reading the "Teacher" and "Student" crap. People in Naruto don't talk like that. Nobody talks like that.

What with the the author's apparent hate for all things Japanese, I found it incredibly pathetic when he had Naruto claiming that he was going to be the Rokudaime Hokage on multiple occasions. Why the hell would Naruto want to be the Sixth Hokage? He can't count?

Moridin
07-06-2012, 12:29 AM
Frankly, the story doesn't draw me in nearly as much as some others. The characters are dry and their growth, while admittedly present, is minimal. Naruto is overpowered like crazy, and this is basically just one crazy adventure where the metal wtfpwns after another. It's a decent enough story, with a novel powerup, but hardly groundbreaking. Comparing it to other stories I am currently following, like Dreaming With Sunshine, Life in Konoha's ANBU and Worth Dying For, this one just doesn't measure up in terms of characterization, making me care about the outcome or the next adventure, or anything really. It's a 3.5, bumped up to 4 for the new idea in the premise and the fact that it is kept relatively fresh.

4/5

Luckylee
07-06-2012, 12:59 AM
I already gave my review on the quality Naruto fics. 3/5

knight504
07-06-2012, 03:04 AM
Yeah, I really should have reviewed earlier.

It's interesting, features a unique power and shows definite deviations from canon. At the same time it's not very immersive, the anti-Jap tendencies are fucking annoying, and it would be improved with a greater focus on the characters rather than the powers and events.

I'd give it a 3.5/5 and it just manages a 4/5 when rounded. I'll keep following it but I won't be eager for an update.

tragicmat1
07-06-2012, 03:51 AM
Yea, character development is subpar. But, a good read nonetheless. 3.5/5, maybe a 4/5 depending on how author handles current arc.

CheddarTrek
07-06-2012, 12:16 PM
Oh, I was also raging a little at reading the "Teacher" and "Student" crap. People in Naruto don't talk like that. Nobody talks like that.
I didn't mind it when it was just Ebisu and Naruto, because I took it to be some sort of weird quirky thing between the two of them in their semi-unique situation. But when it intruded to other characters it began to get on my nerves as much as yours.

merchantofam
07-10-2012, 10:39 PM
I really like the author's attempt at kekkai genkai Naruto, nor do I have any major complaints about grammar. But what irks me the most is the fact in the matter of two chapters the author has essentially written off Gaara and Orichimaru. Granted, I didn't like the latter but the former was a very important secondary character in cannon. Not to mention how they died seems really sloppy.

Gaara's absolute defense, especially at this stage is preternatural so dying in the way depicted by author seems unbelievable. Not to mention, Orichimaru was shown through out the anime as a cautious, albeit very egotistical, man. Therefore, him not knowing about the seal is very slim considering Kabuto is still part of Ne at this point and a highly successful information gatherer.

Overall I would give it a 3.5/5.

Republic
07-11-2012, 03:59 AM
Gaara‘s “absolute defense“ has been shown to be overcome by both speed (Lee) and high piercing power (Sasuke). Naruto‘s method here used both, to the point where Gaara‘s sand didn‘t have time to deploy and his Sand Armor was next to useless.

It all made sense to me :/

Fogo
07-11-2012, 05:12 AM
I think the absolute defense part could have been handled better if the sand had leapt up to defend him, only for the iron wire to slice through it. It would have shown the sand defense working, while still accomplishing Gaara's assassination.

CheddarTrek
07-11-2012, 12:02 PM
I always thought it was stupid that the Kazekage and all of Suna couldn't manage to assassinate Gaara if someone of Lee's skill at the time of the Exams could manage to land a hit.

Menace
07-11-2012, 02:16 PM
I never really got the impression the Kazekage was actually trying to kill him. More, it was his own fucked up way of keeping Gaara in the correct state of mind and honing his skills. If he really wanted to kill him, why not just do it himself?

CheddarTrek
07-11-2012, 05:02 PM
I never really got the impression the Kazekage was actually trying to kill him. More, it was his own fucked up way of keeping Gaara in the correct state of mind and honing his skills. If he really wanted to kill him, why not just do it himself?
That's my point -- I always saw it as the Kazekage being unable to actually kill his son. So if the Kazekage wasn't strong enough it was weird that some Genin could manage to land a hit.

But maybe I read a crappy translation of the Manga and the subtleties were lost.

Tinder
07-11-2012, 08:33 PM
That's my point -- I always saw it as the Kazekage being unable to actually kill his son. So if the Kazekage wasn't strong enough it was weird that some Genin could manage to land a hit.

But maybe I read a crappy translation of the Manga and the subtleties were lost.

Nope, it's just one of many plotholes that fans are forced to come up with rational explanations for in order not to compromise their enjoyment.

WalkingDisaster
07-11-2012, 09:17 PM
That's my point -- I always saw it as the Kazekage being unable to actually kill his son. So if the Kazekage wasn't strong enough it was weird that some Genin could manage to land a hit.

But maybe I read a crappy translation of the Manga and the subtleties were lost.

Eh, I read it less as not being able to and more as not being willing to do the deed himself.

Also, to be fair to Lee, his Taijutsu is supposed to be about high chuunin/low jounin level around that period of time. Especially when he's got the gates going. His fighting style was basically tailor made for beating the Gaara of that time around.

Howdy
07-11-2012, 10:43 PM
Eh, I read it less as not being able to and more as not being willing to do the deed himself.

Also, to be fair to Lee, his Taijutsu is supposed to be about high chuunin/low jounin level around that period of time. Especially when he's got the gates going. His fighting style was basically tailor made for beating the Gaara of that time around.

I'd be careful about making assumptions about strength based only on the genin vs. genin fights.

Neji, who Lee specifically trained the gates to defeat, was easily speed blitzed by every jounin in the room during his fight against Hinata. While the Lee vs. Gaara fight certainly made Lee out to be impressive I very much doubt he was on par with jounin.

It's left very ambiguous how well the rookies would stack up against chuunin/jounin level opponents, though I think it's fair to say that many of the rookies would compare favorably to some chuunin.

Menace
07-11-2012, 10:48 PM
I'm pretty sure Lee never used any of the gates on Neji. Or at least none past the first. Gai was pretty firm on not ever using them against people he cared about, etc. etc. etc. Plus, I don't even think Neji could close his tenketsu long enough to make any sort of difference when Lee's in fifth gate mode. It'd be akin to Naruto's Kyuubi form during the exam final.

Howdy
07-11-2012, 11:42 PM
I'm pretty sure Lee never used any of the gates on Neji. Or at least none past the first. Gai was pretty firm on not ever using them against people he cared about, etc. etc. etc. Plus, I don't even think Neji could close his tenketsu long enough to make any sort of difference when Lee's in fifth gate mode. It'd be akin to Naruto's Kyuubi form during the exam final.

Really?

Because Lee was going to open the first gate just to beat Sasuke before the exam even started.

Just keep in mind that Lee with 4 gates open isn't the same thing as Gai with 4 gates open. It's not a power level. It's simply how much of their own chakra system they've thrown open. Sasuke was almost as fast as Lee was when he eventually fought Gaara in the finals, and gained that speed without opening gates.

Even so, Genma called him merely "chuunin level."

Menace
07-12-2012, 12:10 AM
And Gai was immediately there to smack him down. I doubt he'd give any more slack during training, rivals or not. You're right though, the first gate is small potatoes, and Sasuke probably was as fast as that by the finals. But what I'm talking about is right before Gaara broke Lee's arm/leg, when he was going all out with as many gates as he could stand.

Sasuke was getting through Gaara's defenses consistently during their match, but he was still blocked more than a few times. When Lee unlocked his max gate, Gaara literally could not get out of the air because Lee was kicking his ass, rebounding off a wall, kicking his ass again, rebounding off another wall, etc. Before his sand could do a thing.

Kari Black
07-14-2012, 02:08 AM
Usually when I see something even vaguely bloodline related for Naruto in a fic, I run like hell. So this fic surprised me. They are overpowered and characterization is lacking, but I'm enjoying the ride too much to care. 4/5

Republic
07-16-2012, 09:38 AM
Doing good with the update rate.

Churchey
07-29-2012, 11:51 PM
Just came across this last night in the almost recommendable thread while I was searching for something to read. I skipped over it here because I checked for only completed stories first.
I was excited to find 32 chapters to read, but damn if they aren't short. 32 Chapters of Iron Soul is only ~100k words whereas 7 chapters of A Teacher's Glory is ~86k.
So even with an update rate where you get author's notes like this:
A/N: Holy crap, it took me a week to update! Sorry about that, folks.
You don't get much content. In this case, I'd say the update rate works against it. Not much of a point to reading 3k word updates, imo. On top of that, it's been weeks, so the update rate is no longer as insanely good as it was.

The team is grossly overpowered. Neji can do juken strikes 24cm beyond his fingers because of his chakra bracelets and Tenten has a super chakra sword thanks to Naruto's generosity. Naruto is immune to the juken, has full unbreakable body armor, unbreakable super transforming weapon, endless sealing within his own body, not to mention the more or less sniper rifle capability of his chakra iron whip thing that he beheads gaara with instantly.

That scene in particular was just fail. The author could have easily made the sand respond just enough to slightly lessen the blow or throw it off course. I thought, since the chapters leading up to it actually didn't mention gaara's ultimate subconcious defense, only a speculation of his sand armor, that the blow would be thrown off, perhaps even removing an arm instead of beheading him instantly. My hope was that the attack would prematurely trigger the shukaku, forcing a showdown in the woods.

But no, in addition to the flawless assassination of Gaara, Orochimaru is also burned to a crisp in the same 3k words, despite being one of the top 10 strongest in the series.

"The concept is novel and the writing is great, but the story lacks characterizion" has been mentioned a few times, but honestly the combat in the story is subpar as well. Naruto never takes a hit. In the first meeting with Gaara, nothing happens short of some words and Naruto instantly covering himself with full body armor. In their first mission turned A rank, Naruto kills a couple of people like bad movie extras, then fails to hit his opponent a few times then creates a bunch of clones. The scene then skips ahead and Naruto is said to have blown up his opponent with a large amount of exploding clones. Then, as Kisame's younger jonin brother tries to summon a super shark, Naruto removes his arms instantly. The story talks big, but there is literally no combat. The few combat scenes that are present are complete SHIT. The chunin exam arc itself has yet to have a combat scene in it. They assassinate gaara without being seen, get their scroll with a quick description of a genjutsu+neji-knockout combo, and the preliminaries are scrapped. It wouldn't surprise me if the update rate has slowed considerably because the author actually has to write some combat scenes now for the finals.

The author has made a few attempts to provide Naruto with "weaknesses" but mostly these end up being superficial. Lightning chakra is supposedly super effective, but he develops a seal (that he can instantly create on any part of his body) to absorb this chakra a chapter (read:3k words) later. He is now too heavy to swim...but he can walk on water just fine.

The concept is great. It started out great. But the lack of any characterization, combat, or suitable opponents really makes this story hurt. There's just not any substance below the cool concepts and jutsus that let you geek out a bit, but that gets old quickly.

2.5/5 because despite all its faults, it's still an entertaining read. But I wouldn't consider it library material.

Dnar Semaj
07-30-2012, 12:12 AM
I keep thinking Ebisu is Kakashi and getting confused when the author mentions Ebisu again. HERP DERP.

But 4/5 for sure.