Challenge #1 : Red Sky


Summery: In the history of wizard kind there has been many a dark lord that has risen from the darkness only to be met and defeated in battle by one who was their equal. recent history provides evidence of this in the rise of Grindelwald from 1915 to his fall at the hands of Albus Dumbledore, current headmaster of Hogwarts, in 1945 and the recent fall of the dark lord Voldemort at the end of July last year by one year old Harry Potter. But even if some would tell you different the dark wizards of today are in no way a threat to us when compared to say Bassus who in 1445 rose an army of fourteen million inferi and marched to conquer both France and Russia only being stopped when killed in a wizards dual by Antonio Black, part of the italian branch of the esteemed Black family of which recently saw the loss of family leadership from the branch in England to the American branch, who had been passing through Paris and had gotten caught in the siege of the city. Or you could also compare them to the dark witch Mordriss who in 1808 was finally killed by ministry wizards setting free the six thousand souls of her victims that she had imprisoned inside her own body. Still even when comparing the two most recent dark wizards to two of the more infamous dark magic users in history they all pale in comparison to Nefri who was the first dark magic user in recorded, or remembered, history. To understand this we must cover a bit about Nefri's past.

Nefri was once an apprentice to Merlin, in fact she was reported to be his number one star pupil, however somewhere between 400 B. C. and 350 B. C. there was a falling out of sorts between them and Nefri disappeared for the next two hundred years of which there is no record of her appearance. She reemerges in Cairo Egypt in 150 B. C., on the 200 year anniversary of her break with Merlin, With a considerable boost of power and more then a uncomfortable pleasure in the pain of others. From here she quickly conquers Africa and starts to spread her influence. Meanwhile in England Merlin has just revolutionized the magical world by creating the magic system that still to this day we use. He, at this point in time, has not heard a word of what is to come. Merlin may have created modern magic but that was not to say he was the only one, Nefri is credited the creation of Necromancy and Soul magic, both of which are band from practice world wide. Nefri will continue to conquer for the next fifty years unhindered until she reaches Italy and encounters the magical might of the Zabini family which drags into a long bloody twenty five year war, that saw the rise of such dark creatures as the Werewolf and the Vampire, until finally Nefri calls off her forces and instead turns her conquest to modern day Germany and France before setting her sights on Britain.

It is interesting to note that this is where Nefri's history ends for she never even makes it across the English channel before she is confronted and soundly defeated by Merlin in Cairo which saw the immediate dissolve of her army and influence however the sheer evil that her power emitted as it was released from her dying body was the cause of several incidents that would lead to the fall of Rome and the subsequent withdrawal of the Wizards from the Muggle world.

Of everything that was claimed as treasure after the war no one is exactly sure what ever became of the mighty fortress which Nefri had made her home. The fortress was situated in the middle of Cairo so as to use the populace as a shield from the might of siege magic, which has been baned since the fall of Grindelwald, and was named quiet simply the Palace of Pain by all who lived near it. The only plausible explanation of what could have happened to it comes from a brief remark in Merlins journal which simply stated that he had taken care of something that should not have exsisted in this world in the first place. Still for all of the warning signs this brings up many a Glory Seeker has gone in search of the dark place and out of all of them, which numbers in the millions collectively, only six have ever returned. Those being Godric Gryffindor, Helga Hufflepuff, Rowena Ravenclaw, Salazar Slytherin, Albus Dumbledore, and a young boy by the name of Tom Riddle who has not been seen since one year after his reputed return from the dark palace.

Indeed Nefri, the Blood Queen, has left her mark on the world in such a way that it will be a while still before the world recovers. If it ever does.

of Darkness and Blood: a history of dark magic and its users
By: Emerald Gyce


Terms of Challenge:

1: Harry Potter must be out of Hogwarts if he attended and he must be eighteen or older.

2: No romance unless it is with Fem!Blaze

3: no Dumbledore bashing.

4. no redeemed Draco or Snape.

5. Hermione and Ron do not hang around Harry. Either He goes it alone or with Blaze if you are doing a Romance and you want her to go with him

6. The little history text like thing above is the very basics of the story frame as such use it however you see fit, but it must be used.

7. while I am not a fan of Ginny I don't particularly hate her and since this story can get along just fine without her, and because I just don't like it in general, there will be no bashing of her character or any character at all.

If you decide to pick this up please tell me. I look forward to seeing somebody write this!

 

Just a quick point, it is spelt Blaise, not Blaze.

 

Blaise, not Blaze...

Also, the severe limitation of the romance is irritating simply because of its limitations. And the list of those who returned, very cliche and predictable. Id expect the book to have been written before grindelwald and dumbledore anyway.

Over all it has a lot of promise if it had some kinks worked out.

Like the Zabini thing. I doubt if someone conquers Africa is going to be stopped by a single family, no mater the families resources. And the Black family. There may be American and Italian Blacks but I'm pretty sure if there are, from the view you get from canon, they are all self-sustained. They dont interact and each area has their own head.

 

I must admit to liking the idea that all the old families have a world wide network, and while each branch has a local head, there is an overall Head of the Family. I just like that sort of thing in general. Though i don't like the way you have it pass from the English branch to the American branch. Sounds like a set up for Harry to suddenly be rescued by his "cool" american "cousins" and spend his summer in "cool" america, learning "cool" "dark" magic that is only illegal in Britain but no where else.

However, i do like the idea of Harry going off to quest for the the Palace of Pain for whatever reason. And maybe when he gets there, there is an ultimate test, that either sends you down the path of light, or that path of dark.

As was stated before you are very cliche with the list. It is almost guarenteed that others would have returned. Dumbledore might be the most powerful wizard alive at the moment, but it doesn't mean there hasn't been someone just as power or more so before. And the involvement of the founders, is awfully cliche. Perhaps simply make it that all known survivors of such a quest have either become famous Light Lords or infamous Dark Lords.

I like the idea of perhaps integrating the idea of Harry's quest for the fortress with his finding out all about the Old Family network. Perhaps as he travels in search of the Palace of Pain whilst making contact with the different Branches of the Potter family. And maybe include some diplomacy and negotiations with the other extended Families. Make a big deal out of the network, maybe hav it as a more Political!Harry than anything else.

Also, don't limit the ship to just the one. Let the author have some discretion over that.

 

Seems like a good challenge, even though it did read a bit long (use commas more often or my head go boom).

I agree with the others on the ship thing, you could just have <insert well known pureblood name here> as the family with a different character for the ship. As well as the 6 people. Maybe having just one of the founders go there instead of all four. Dumbledore, I imagine, would have tried to destory the place if its name means anything. He's staunch light side, and he wouldn't want any Dark Lords in training to find it. Remember, he did fight Grindelwald.

 

very well if thats what you wish then it does not have to be Blaise but let it be on the record that I prefer Blaise. As for the Zabini thing in italy take note that I left it mostly unexplained and only said that because of this conflict Vampires and Werewolves came into being. I never said how the Zabini's held out or who made the Vampires or Werewolves and so on and so forth. That is for the Author to decide. Also take into account that this is a mock history text from the story thus the book would only mention people of distinction as they were easy to find info on. Who is to say that nobody else did not also survive and just never told anybody? I purposely left a lot of things unclear so the author could interpret it as they wished and still work with it.

As for the English to American thing.....Meh you can change THAT if it really bothers you that much but note that the unforgivibles are illegal no matter where you go and Necromancy and Soul magic are banned world wide.

Thats just it! Why did Dumbledore NOT destroy it? Was he not powerful enough? Was there something there that prevented him from doing so? The point is that there is something inside the Palace that seems to be so valuable or important or whatever that everybody believes should not be harmed or touched. I mean If it was just a cooky old evil palace what would be the point? There has to be something special about it.

 

I still like the idea of something being there that will either send you to the complete light or complete dark. Like test of faith or something but different.

 

It could be that. Remeber I left a lot of stuff unclear at best and non exsistant at worse so you can develop it as you see fit.

 

... I've read the responses and I get this horrid image in my head...

Prince of Persia/Harry Potter cross over. Specifically Warrior Within. Like Nefri being the Empress Of Time, and harry running around doing backflips, having a sword and dagger, and running on walls and shit.

 

dame that IS scary! But this is the what I presented as the idea/challenge so it is whoever it is that picks it up's job to make it a good fic, and the reason it was so explained out is because I wrote ideas on another forum for a while and the site admin kept complaining about them bot being detailed enough.

 

I pretty much like the Idea. It could be done quite well if the author knew what he was doing and has the ability to pull off something that is somewhat original like that without reverting to canonish.