Haha loved the chapter Nonjon i'm kinda glad that he has finaly been honest about what he is, though i would have liked to see him "come out of the closet" when doing some awesome action scene but meh?...Do you plan on having him tell them his actual age and his other history? i cant see the crew not wanting answers after what you just did?

 

There'll be a much more thorough inquisition when they get back to the ship. I doubt *everything* will come out, but they will find out a fair amount more of the details.

And I considered it coming out when they were under some massive Reaver attack. It couldn't be an action scene with other people, or else that's more and more folks seeing 'unbelievable' things, but Reavers were a possibility. I quickly decided I liked the necessity of a sick mom better and never really could up with something more appropriate.

 

Hey nonjon what’s with the no secrecy charm or something similar? I can imagine plenty of scenarios where it would be useful even though you have shown no people with the ability of legilimency, I think Harry might want to do that just incase.

 

Chap 16: The first part wasn't the best you've ever written, seemed mildly forced at times.

After Harry Christ met Jane's mum, it got much better. Book of Jane sealed the deal, great stuff.

Can't wait for Harry to finally explain about magic (with a few secrets hopefully kept to himself) and move the plot to the real thing (dissapearance of wizards).

 

Chapter 16 dident start as good as your other chapters but it got better once harry woke up again... Squirrel bacon

 

Hmm... I wonder if I'm overworking sections because I liked the start where Courtney seemed to come to the conclusion about Harry's identity.

If there's anything in particular either of you (IP or Patrik) could point out, it'd be appreciated, but I know sometimes it's just the way it reads in general. Though I agree I think the rest of the chapter performed with a raised level of hijinx.

And now the Book of Jayne can make writing scenes or even skipping over bits so much easier.

 

Nothing particular, just the general feeling that humor was vaguely forced. It wasn't funny nor was it very interesting, so I took it as a filler material.

Hmm... could be because there wasn't Harry around and I suspect both Patrick and I don't care much for Serenity characters?

In any case, nothing too bad with this chapter. Very well written and interesting, like the rest of the novel so far.

 

Great chapter... Love the never-ending pouch of ham cubes

 

Yeah this chapter's a bit of a snoozer for DLP'ers and the HP fans. But my fics classified as "Firefly" first and "HP" second, so I felt it was a necessity. Shouldn't have too many of these sorts of redundant recap-ish moments.

 

Great Chapter, but shoul'nt harry have more knowledge on spells and stuff ?,like healing charms,\ he was 300 yrs+ before he wnet into stasis. still excllent work

 

Actually he's only 154 now. He also said that was the only healing charm he thought useful because with his power he could fix practically anything.

 

So far I'm really enjoying this story, even despite never seeing Firefly/Serenity.
It helps that you explain things that are not widely known.

I actually like Harry in this story because he seems to have more depth to him.

The chapters are a ideal length, without grammatical torture.
The mystery of the wizarding world is driving me crazy, it's a good way to keep an air of suspense.

I also like that you're not focusing on pairings, because too many fan-fics loose steam after romance is in the air. It's also sometimes irreverent with the humor, which I'm liking alot.

I loved the bit's with Jayne and can't wait to read more.

It's also great how you seem to churn out chapters, which prevents the suspense from becoming unbearable.

I look forward to reading more, your writing is excellent.
Keep up the good work.

Litha

 

Yeah, Harry is a bit of a super!wizard. Far more strength than average (approximately more than Dumbledore and as much as Voldie-might as well just go with 'marked as equal' for a measure of strength), a pretty respectable amount of knowledge, but not a complete scholar and Ravenclaw or anything. And for sure a fierce determination to win. And he always did.

Lord Xantam was right. Harry only ever learned the generic healing spell because he had so much power that it was all he ever needed. It just took an awful lot of his energy, so he'd heal himself, and in emergencies others, but most of the time leaving the healing work to the healers.

I'm not just going to start giving him new super cool powers for no reason, but he's miles ahead of canon!Harry. We will see a bit of his knowledge on tricks with a pensieve.

 

Cant wait for the next chapter. Will Harry ever find more then scattered clues about the wizarding world? Have they cloaked an entire planet or something to remain unknown to the muggles?

 

Yeah it was a good chapter, even with overinflated description of HP world. Harry might have been a bit too acomodating to the crew but overall, it wasn't too bad.

I'm also eager to see what turns out of that pensive. Having some survivor's memories there could be a good way to give another clue about the exodus.

 

oh,so the healing charm ,can it heal anything with enough power?

 

I doubt it could heal a bullet in the head, but it did heal the disease Jayne's mom had which I assume is something akin to cancer.

 

Doubt theres anything in there or else they would've said there was silver stuff in it.

 

Harry's not really shown it much, but he's a bit lonely. It'd be hard not to be, when no one knows the real him. And until he knows more, he hasn't wanted to let anyone know a lot of these secrets. (Think of those dimension traveling stories where he pours his heart out like a babbling baby within a few days.)

Because you gotta realize, if something exterminated all of the wizards or sucked the magic out of them, he doesn't exactly want word of his existence to get around. Then again, it could be getting word spread is what will alert the hiding wizards to his existence. You know, assuming they're not all dead. Then I suppose we should hope that these aren't the types who would oppose Harry's presence. Or feel threatened at the return of one of the most famous and powerful. Nope. Come to think of it, Harry's got the right of it. Keeping secret as best he can.

But this isn't an independent, focused, everyone's-out-to-get-him Harry. And can you see Albus Dumbledore going two years before ever opening up to a person? Harry's not Albus, but he's a lot more like canon!Albus (the good parts, IP82) than canon!Harry. It hasn't been said in so many words yet, but part of Harry liking the crew and wanting to stick around is that helping River has given Harry some purpose at least.

And, yeah, the gist of it is that the healing charm could heal anything. In theory. I'm not so sure Harry's power could reattach his severed head or anything. But think pure and simple healing power of Jesus. "Heal, my son!" It's roughly based on some fanon concepts of "will magic" if you know that.

I'd say it's unlikely silvery stuff in the bowl would have been overlooked when it was mentioned. Not counting that's it's been dropped twice by Duncan.

Besides, think of it this way: If you're a muggle, trying to sell an old bowl you came across, what's the first thing you do to entice a buyer? You clean it out.

That's not to say it won't carry a clue or two. I mean locating these artifacts and objects are themselves only part of the new info. It's also a question of where'd it come from and how'd it get here? Or maybe there'll be other clues. You never know.

And let's not overlook the fact that Harry's got more people working on this mystery now. Including some extremely clever analytical minds.

 

Yeah, throughout the story, you've been leaving extremely veiled clues about how much Harry CRAVES to be accepted by someone for who he realy is. And that scene I was speaking of was one of the stronger clues about this aspect of Harry's character. Hell, he was sounding almost panicky when he saw apparent fear in the crew's eyes and affraid that they might dump him. It's commendable how you managed to leave these impressions, without Harry outright saying (or even worse, crying) about how lonely he is and desperate for companionship. So yes, I see what you're doing, and I'm OK with Harry still being human, I'm not exactly a Dark!Harry fanboy (does a thing like that even exists? *looks at several DLP posts* Yup!).

But still, I don't think Harry should have gone so far as to give them such a hasty "ask anything and I tell" free card. Dunno, it just seemed kinda panicky and childish from someone who has been keeping secrets for several years and who has EVERYTHING to lose if his secrets and especially precise information about his abilities (which is what he bared to the crew) gets out.

Of course, this is just a minor point, just a shades in characterisation. I'm not saying your choice in that scene was bad, just that I would have prefered it streched to a few more chapters of Harry's internal battle.

I was thinking that maybe the Pensive has a lid, so it's closed and un-openable by muggles... hmm, does Dumbledore's pensive have one or is the lid just a fandom thing?