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Old 11-19-2009, 10:18 AM   #1
craigery9700
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Delenda Est by Lord Silvere - T

Title: Delenda Est
Author: Lord Silvere
Rating: T
Genre: General/Time Travel
Pairing: Harry/Bellatrix
Chapters: 40
Words: 343,929
Updated: January 13, 2013
Published: November 14, 2009

Status: WIP

Summary:

Harry is a prisoner, and Bellatrix has fallen from grace. The accidental activation of Bella’s treasured heirloom results in another chance for Harry. It also gives him the opportunity to make the acquaintance of the young and enigmatic Bellatrix Black.

Link:
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5511855/1/

Mostly posted it because i liked his first story way back when it was first posted. I also enjoy the Harry/Bellatrix ship.

Time travel fic, not sure i like the get the wand from family vault, hopefully, it doesn't have a list of being owned by super-powered ancestors, or that he suddenly finds out from the goblins he is the heir to several ancient magical lines. If it avoids those it could be a rather good fic, too early to give a number rating yet.


Checked by Minion, February 4, 2013

Last edited by Dark Minion; 02-04-2013 at 02:31 PM.
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Old 11-19-2009, 10:24 AM   #2
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Care to give us a bit more information on the story from your point of view? I've seen this many times on FF.net when looking to see if there have been H/Bella updates, but the summary just never made it enticing enough to actually read.
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Old 11-19-2009, 11:25 AM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by craigery9700 View Post
too early to give a number rating yet.
Then too early to submit to For Review yet, you idiot.
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Old 11-19-2009, 11:46 AM   #4
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Nice start. His last name is a nice touch and I like how Harry's shown to be mature. The coming Dumbledore talk though will either make or break the fic.
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Old 11-19-2009, 03:18 PM   #5
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This fic has potential.

Unfortunately that is mostly because I happen to like Harry/Bellatrix, and not because any real accomplishments on the fic's part. The characters are all OoC, and I'm half-way expecting Dumbledore to open the upcoming conversation by "What the hell were you doing, you motherfuckers?"

I will wait at least a few chapters more before rating the fic, but if I had to vote now, I would give it three stars.
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Old 11-19-2009, 08:52 PM   #6
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I like it, although I wish there was more than two chapters. I especially like the title "must be destroyed"
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Old 11-19-2009, 08:55 PM   #7
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Not bad at all. The author can't do witty banter to save his life, and Voldemort hunting down a few survivors after having destroyed the Order and the Ministry before executing Harry, the greatest existing threat, is contrived as hell.

The writing's generally good though.

3/5
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Old 11-19-2009, 08:56 PM   #8
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I liked what is there of it so far. Level of writing is good, but not mindblowingly awesome. Environments are sparse and the general story telling is more or less skeletal. You don't really feel immersed. I feel that the introductory chapters are important in building the 'world' of the story, and that wasn't really done here.

I enjoy time travel fics and this seems like it will develop into a guilty pleasure if nothing else. Several cliches have already popped up, and like Random said characters are all oc.

I believe this will be Harry becomes his parent's teacher type deals, which is usually a turn off for me. Probably because I haven't seen it done well.

Anyway, just two chapters, it's got me interested enough to look for updates but I can't give it an endorsement yet. 3/5 as it stands, but I expect will go to 4/5.
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Old 11-19-2009, 09:36 PM   #9
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I read it, but I can't say I was all that impressed with the first two chapters. As Andromalius said, the author is awful with witty banter - in fact, the dialogue is the worst part of the story thus far. It does have redeeming qualities and a potential to get better, but most of that comes due to the rare pairing.

Is the Earl of the North any good? Regardless, this one will probably follow a similar path as that story, no matter how the author says they are different.

I'll hold off on rating this, as it probably shouldn't be in For Review to start with, but if I had to, I wouldn't give it above a 3/5 as is.
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Old 11-19-2009, 09:39 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Averis View Post
Is the Earl of the North any good?
In 2006? Without a doubt

Now? Guilty pleasure at best
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Old 11-20-2009, 02:16 AM   #11
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This is COMPLETELY AVERAGE!!!!
awesome bold to make story remotely epic
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Old 11-20-2009, 05:38 AM   #12
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This is COMPLETELY AVERAGE!!!!
awesome bold to make story remotely epic
For now at any rate... It does have some potential to become a fairly good fic.... Just gotta wait and see how the author writes up the future chapters...
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Old 11-20-2009, 08:50 AM   #13
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It updated. We have had the Dumbledore meets AU Harry scene.

So apparently young Bellatrix Black is a gestalt of Hermione, Ron, Ginny, and the twins, in the authors' words. (facepalm). Why is it that whenever there is someone curious about magic in HP fandom s/he has to be compared to Hermione. It would seem as if the only one actually interested in magic in all of Harry Potter was Hermione Granger and has forevermore claimed all rights to be excited about it. (/rant)

Anywho, for someone who has just sprung out of captivity from god knows how long Harry is way too well put together. Bellatrix is already flat, using muggle phrases and cussing - oh yes, there is love in the air. Abusive ooc lover stereotype here we come.

A couple of original characters were introduced and took up a lot of time in the chapter, I suppose they will be important.

So far my hopes for this getting better are not materializing. That said, it is three chapters long.
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Old 11-20-2009, 11:40 AM   #14
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So far my hopes for this getting better are not materializing. That said, it is three chapters long.
It doesn't matter whether this is three or thirty chapters, it won't get better.

2/5 now. Hopes got shot down remarkably fast.
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Old 11-20-2009, 12:04 PM   #15
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An average story that might have been considered good a few years back.

2/5 from me as well.
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Old 11-20-2009, 01:06 PM   #16
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Why is it that whenever there is someone curious about magic in HP fandom s/he has to be compared to Hermione. It would seem as if the only one actually interested in magic in all of Harry Potter was Hermione Granger and has forevermore claimed all rights to be excited about it. (/rant)
As far as I can tell, the only people in canon that are remotely interested in and curious about magic are Voldemort and Hermione.

Anyway, while it's not library worthy, it's not heinous. I'll give it a 3/5 for the recycle bin.
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Old 11-20-2009, 01:23 PM   #17
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As far as I can tell, the only people in canon that are remotely interested in and curious about magic are Voldemort and Hermione.
What about Dumbledore? Or perhaps Snape. Even the Marauders. All of them were curious and interested in magic.
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Old 11-20-2009, 02:15 PM   #18
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Uhh, I would think that when talking about canon characters interested in magic, the Weasley twins would spring to mind fairly quickly, what with all the, you know, inventing they did with their joke shop stuff.
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Old 11-20-2009, 02:37 PM   #19
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This is now BELOW AVERAGE!
Read what N wrote. I don't go for abusive girls in stories that act ooc.
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Old 11-21-2009, 02:19 AM   #20
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Good Potential, but is running some serious cliche' including Deus Ex time travel Device and 'UBER' wand.

3.5/5 if I rated it, but very much to short to do that.

Edit: 'Ladykiller' Harry is pretty standard for IndyTimeTravel!Harry stories too.
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