DLP Flash Christmas Competition + Writing Marathon 2024!

Competition topic: Magical New Year!

Marathon goal? Crank out words!

Check the marathon thread or competition thread for details.
Dismiss Notice
Hi there, Guest
Only registered users can really experience what DLP has to offer. Many forums are only accessible if you have an account. Why don't you register?
Dismiss Notice
Introducing for your Perusing Pleasure

New Thread Thursday
+
Shit Post Sunday

READ ME
Dismiss Notice

DLP Story Competition Guest User Registration Nag SPS + NTT

Make Pictures Funny Again

Discussion in 'The Humor Mill' started by Jon, Jan 23, 2017.

Not open for further replies.

: 5/5, 3 votes

Page 224 of 228

Cjonbloodletter Professor

Joined:

Jan 29, 2007

Messages:

472

Gender:

Male

Location:

In Lord Jabu Jabu

Nov 14, 2019 #4461

Last edited: Nov 14, 2019

"It all averages out, shit happens two to three times a week, ordinary people do it in the median." Tim Dorsey, "Orange Crush"

Ash'Ura, pbluekan, ScottPress
Arthellion Lord of the Banned ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

Joined:

Apr 14, 2017

Messages:

1,395

Gender:

Male

Location:

Georgia, USA

High Score:

4400

Nov 15, 2019 #4462

--- Post automerged ---

--- Post automerged ---

You know you're something when you can line up Arthellion, DR, and Vlad [RIP] on the same side ~ Nazgus

Arthellion Delenda Est -DLP

Scene: a fairly average cemetery, basking in the last rays of the mid-autumn sun, 70 F and not a cloud in the sky. A man, nondescript, wearing sunglasses that were popular several summers ago, but were more likely picked up after that fact, opens a gate that has seen better days. Miraculously, no metal whine occurs as he does so. All the same, he leaves it open, though whether it is out of fear of the grating sound or out of negligence is unclear.

He moves with less purpose than usually seen. It is as if he is looking for someone, but, being unfamiliar with this particular cemetery, he is momentarily lost. Yet soon, he finds a trail, and picks up the pace, moving with purpose to end up in front of one of the most recent graves. He takes in the sight: flowers, lack of tombstone - it is too recent a passing - and the wooden plate with engraving that serves as it for now. He lowers his head, offering a silent prayer, or perhaps thoughts, before leaving something of his own.

It is an engraved piece of wood, similar to the tombstone, but smaller, and far more intricate. Eagle-eyed viewers easily make out the sloth hidden behind, but the circle and large stripe across make no sense to people not in the know. As it should be. After that, the man leaves. Yet, those closeby might hear a whisper on the wind. "Finally, Arthellion is banned."

Inert, Ash'Ura, Kraken, Longsword, Kravot, Zerg_Lurker, oakgem217, ScottPress
Zombie Black Philip Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐

Joined:

Apr 28, 2007

Messages:

6,036

Nov 15, 2019 #4463

r/murderedbywords (where I ganked this)

Last edited: Nov 15, 2019

Magnum said: ↑

How did a cruel bully like you become a mod?
Click to expand...

Fics: What's the Story Morning Glory (WBA) (FFN) | The Revenge of Harry Potter (WBA) | Draco's Adventure (FFN) (WBA) | Desiccation(FFN) | Upside Down (FFN) | Food Related (Ask a Chef)
Wanna Sprint? Join Us, Rules Here.

Work By Author Rules Here, Review Board Rules Here

Nemrut, Sauce Bauss, Tenages, Otters, Myduraz, Ceins, sonder, Kravot, PomMan, Inert, Majube, H_A_Greene, Ash'Ura, Psychotic Cat, Dagro, DR, Kraken, Innomine, pbluekan, The Arid Legion, Quiddity, 9th Doctor, ScottPress, Phantom of the Library, Nevermind, VanRopen, Oruma, oakgem217, Nazgoose, Thaumologist, Zerg_Lurker, Rhaegar I, The Iron Rose
Seratin Proudmander –§ Prestigious §– DLP Supporter

Joined:

Oct 14, 2007

Messages:

293

Location:

Dún na ngall

High Score:

5,792

Nov 15, 2019 #4464

I thought she was supposed to be against gun violence and yet she shoots a man right in the dick?

Zeelthor said:

You're one sick, brilliant fucker, Seratin
Click to expand...

The Indigo Road | Great and Terrible
A Pokemon Quest | A Harry Potter story

H_A_Greene, Ash'Ura, Kraken, ScottPress, VanRopen, Johnnyseattle, Oment, oakgem217
Longsword Banned

Joined:

Feb 1, 2015

Messages:

558

Nov 15, 2019 #4465

Just two attention whores
Zombie Black Philip Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐

Joined:

Apr 28, 2007

Messages:

6,036

Nov 15, 2019 #4466

Longsword said: ↑

Just two attention whores
Click to expand...

Post funny pics. Keep your personal opinion to politics where no one else gives a fuck about it either.

Magnum said: ↑

How did a cruel bully like you become a mod?
Click to expand...

Fics: What's the Story Morning Glory (WBA) (FFN) | The Revenge of Harry Potter (WBA) | Draco's Adventure (FFN) (WBA) | Desiccation(FFN) | Upside Down (FFN) | Food Related (Ask a Chef)
Wanna Sprint? Join Us, Rules Here.

Work By Author Rules Here, Review Board Rules Here

James, Zilly Sawdust, Shadow Shaman, Plotless, Sauce Bauss, Rhaegar I, Tenages, Otters, Xantam, MonkeyEpoxy, oakgem217, sonder, Download, Feoffic, Mishie, Genghiz Khan, PomMan, Inert, Majube, H_A_Greene, Ash'Ura, Psychotic Cat, Kraken, Innomine, pbluekan, Quiddity, 9th Doctor, Phantom of the Library, Aekiel, Cjonbloodletter, VanRopen, Johnnyseattle, TheWiseTomato, The Iron Rose, Seratin, Nazgoose, Arthellion
Arthellion Lord of the Banned ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

Joined:

Apr 14, 2017

Messages:

1,395

Gender:

Male

Location:

Georgia, USA

High Score:

4400

Nov 15, 2019 #4467

You know you're something when you can line up Arthellion, DR, and Vlad [RIP] on the same side ~ Nazgus

Arthellion Delenda Est -DLP

Scene: a fairly average cemetery, basking in the last rays of the mid-autumn sun, 70 F and not a cloud in the sky. A man, nondescript, wearing sunglasses that were popular several summers ago, but were more likely picked up after that fact, opens a gate that has seen better days. Miraculously, no metal whine occurs as he does so. All the same, he leaves it open, though whether it is out of fear of the grating sound or out of negligence is unclear.

He moves with less purpose than usually seen. It is as if he is looking for someone, but, being unfamiliar with this particular cemetery, he is momentarily lost. Yet soon, he finds a trail, and picks up the pace, moving with purpose to end up in front of one of the most recent graves. He takes in the sight: flowers, lack of tombstone - it is too recent a passing - and the wooden plate with engraving that serves as it for now. He lowers his head, offering a silent prayer, or perhaps thoughts, before leaving something of his own.

It is an engraved piece of wood, similar to the tombstone, but smaller, and far more intricate. Eagle-eyed viewers easily make out the sloth hidden behind, but the circle and large stripe across make no sense to people not in the know. As it should be. After that, the man leaves. Yet, those closeby might hear a whisper on the wind. "Finally, Arthellion is banned."

Sauce Bauss, oakgem217, sonder, Mishie, Majube, H_A_Greene, Ash'Ura, Kraken, Paradise, pbluekan, Panther, Quiddity, ScottPress, Phantom of the Library, Nevermind, Genghiz Khan, VanRopen, Oz, Zombie, Nazgoose, Oment
Oment The Betrayer DLP Supporter

Joined:

Apr 11, 2011

Messages:

3,592

Nov 15, 2019 #4468

Curse my sudden but inevitable betrayals.

Ur-Fascism is still around us, sometimes in plainclothes. It would be so much easier for us if there appeared on the world scene somebody saying, "I want to reopen Auschwitz, I want the Blackshirts to parade again in the Italian squares." Life is not that simple. Ur-Fascism can come back under the most innocent of disguises. Our duty is to uncover it and to point our finger at any of its new instances — every day, in every part of the world. [...] Freedom and liberation are an unending task.
Click to expand...

-- Umberto Eco, Ur-Fascism

darklordmike, oakgem217, Inert, H_A_Greene, Ash'Ura, Kraken, LittleChicago, pbluekan, ScottPress, Nevermind, Arthellion
Silirt Chief Warlock DLP Supporter ⭐⭐

Joined:

Sep 19, 2018

Messages:

1,528

Gender:

Male

Location:

Georgia

Nov 15, 2019 #4469

Arthellion said: ↑

Click to expand...

That seems unfair. I distinctly remember a time he invited a threadban for one of the politics threads.
Also:

"Everything about you seems like Chaotic Evil. " -Majube, pronounced Mah-jew-bay

Rookwood on Blood Purism

Rhaegar I, oakgem217, H_A_Greene, Ash'Ura, Kraken, ScottPress, The Iron Rose, Nazgoose
Arthellion Lord of the Banned ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

Joined:

Apr 14, 2017

Messages:

1,395

Gender:

Male

Location:

Georgia, USA

High Score:

4400

Nov 15, 2019 #4470

You know you're something when you can line up Arthellion, DR, and Vlad [RIP] on the same side ~ Nazgus

Arthellion Delenda Est -DLP

Scene: a fairly average cemetery, basking in the last rays of the mid-autumn sun, 70 F and not a cloud in the sky. A man, nondescript, wearing sunglasses that were popular several summers ago, but were more likely picked up after that fact, opens a gate that has seen better days. Miraculously, no metal whine occurs as he does so. All the same, he leaves it open, though whether it is out of fear of the grating sound or out of negligence is unclear.

He moves with less purpose than usually seen. It is as if he is looking for someone, but, being unfamiliar with this particular cemetery, he is momentarily lost. Yet soon, he finds a trail, and picks up the pace, moving with purpose to end up in front of one of the most recent graves. He takes in the sight: flowers, lack of tombstone - it is too recent a passing - and the wooden plate with engraving that serves as it for now. He lowers his head, offering a silent prayer, or perhaps thoughts, before leaving something of his own.

It is an engraved piece of wood, similar to the tombstone, but smaller, and far more intricate. Eagle-eyed viewers easily make out the sloth hidden behind, but the circle and large stripe across make no sense to people not in the know. As it should be. After that, the man leaves. Yet, those closeby might hear a whisper on the wind. "Finally, Arthellion is banned."

James, Alindrome, Rhaegar I, VanRopen, Zerg_Lurker, oakgem217, H_A_Greene, Ash'Ura, Kraken, Joe, pbluekan
Ash'Ura Totally Sirius

Joined:

Dec 10, 2009

Messages:

3,427

Gender:

Male

Location:

Texas

Nov 16, 2019 #4471

DR said: ↑

Real world: I'm taking that space and you can eat a dick.
Click to expand...

Real world: People like you cause accidents and get people killed on the road. I mean this in the nicest way possible but being an angry dickhead on the road who thinks they can play with people's live because they need to get to the office 5min early isn't cool, funny, or even sane, it's just retarded. That spacing rule was made for a reason, honestly. Left lane passing lane only as well. It's just good driving sense.

~Anyway, back to da memes man.~

Edit: @Zenzao Still hurts to this day my dude.

Last edited: Nov 16, 2019

Uncle Iroh said:

While it always best to believe in oneself, a little help from others can be a great blessing.
Click to expand...

James, R. E. Lee, Kraken, Rhaegar I, oakgem217, The Iron Rose, Blorcyn, Mishie, Longsword, Chengar Qordath, DarthBill, VanRopen, Marsupial, Nazgoose, H_A_Greene
H_A_Greene Unspeakable –§ Prestigious §– DLP Supporter

Joined:

Aug 30, 2009

Messages:

715

High Score:

4,492

Nov 16, 2019 #4472

Nemrut, Inert, Kraken, Rhaegar I, Quiddity, Phantom of the Library, oakgem217, Thaumologist, Oruma, Panther, Blorcyn, ScottPress, Longsword, Arthellion, Ash'Ura, VanRopen
Zombie Black Philip Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐

Joined:

Apr 28, 2007

Messages:

6,036

Nov 16, 2019 #4473

Magnum said: ↑

How did a cruel bully like you become a mod?
Click to expand...

Fics: What's the Story Morning Glory (WBA) (FFN) | The Revenge of Harry Potter (WBA) | Draco's Adventure (FFN) (WBA) | Desiccation(FFN) | Upside Down (FFN) | Food Related (Ask a Chef)
Wanna Sprint? Join Us, Rules Here.

Work By Author Rules Here, Review Board Rules Here

James, Inert, Kraken, Rhaegar I, Longsword, Download, Blorcyn, Genghiz Khan, H_A_Greene, Kravot, DarthBill, Nazgoose, oakgem217, sonder, ScottPress, Nevermind, Solfege, The Iron Rose
Otters Groundskeeper ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

Joined:

Jun 8, 2010

Messages:

367

High Score:

2005

Nov 16, 2019 #4474

Pineapple does go on pizza.
Pikachu used Rare Candy. It was super addictive!

James, Kraken, Sauce Bauss, Rhaegar I, Longsword, Phantom of the Library, Nazgoose, oakgem217, VanRopen, The Arid Legion, H_A_Greene, Kravot, ScottPress, Nevermind
H_A_Greene Unspeakable –§ Prestigious §– DLP Supporter

Joined:

Aug 30, 2009

Messages:

715

High Score:

4,492

Nov 17, 2019 #4475

Sauce Bauss, Nuit, Zerg_Lurker, oakgem217, VanRopen, DR
Nevermind Headmaster

Joined:

Mar 18, 2017

Messages:

1,175

Gender:

Male

Location:

The Medium Place

High Score:

0

Nov 17, 2019 #4476

Forever flat to the square right…

James, Kraken, Rhaegar I, Mister Ferro, H_A_Greene, DarthBill, oakgem217, ScottPress, Scarty
FivePilots First Year

Joined:

Nov 16, 2019

Messages:

26

Gender:

Male

Location:

Netherlands

Nov 17, 2019 #4477
Solfege Chief Warlock DLP Supporter

Joined:

Nov 21, 2008

Messages:

1,531

Location:

East Coast & the South

Nov 18, 2019 #4478

"every song i write feels like the last song I'll ever write, and the moment it's done I fully forget how I did any of it lol. if artists were fully honest in interviews half our answers to Qs about 'process' would probably be 'i don't know dude'" -mitski
"I'm surprised to hear you say this because of how frequently you rightly attribute your success to and advocate for the hard work approach... yet songwriting is unexplainable magic? How do you reconcile these two things?" -bystander
"listen you learn your craft as much as you can so that when the magic comes swimming down the river you have the net to catch it" -mitski
"Appreciate this intellectual honesty. I think it is true of investing theses too..." -anonymous VC

Sauce Bauss
Archinist Hαn Sαlsæd First

Joined:

Jun 30, 2019

Messages:

485

Gender:

Male

Location:

Holy Terra

Nov 18, 2019 #4479

Faith.

I don't know when you gave it up, lost child. Were you never loved when you were young? Did a woman spurn you, or did the system beat you down? What hardships drove you, controlled you, until you came before me today?

It's hard to keep faith when I see children like you, broken and despoiled, then tossed aside when their purpose is finished. Oh yes, my boy, you're hardly the first ringleader I've seen down here, and you might yet not be the last. You’re full of fire and fury, just like all the ones before, but you and I both know that it’s a hollow feeling. There’s a faith-sized hole in your heart, and no amount of Warp-spawn will fill it.

You don’t have faith in the Imperium. You don’t have faith in your fellow man. You can’t even believe in love, or hope, or joy and despair that doesn’t come from an alien abomination. You can’t see the ocean of corruption, yet you’re drowning in it. You’re lost in the wilderness, little child, and only you and the Emperor can know how deep you’ve sunk.

Other lost children have asked me why I stay. Minister of a sad little church, shepard of a tiny flock, drowning in the greed and corruption from above - I’m just one man. I stand here fighting a battle already lost, with the hive in flames, the Governor and his cronies dead, and the black ships standing watch above. Perhaps there is no point to this mad universe; mayhaps it truly is a galaxy spinning adrift from rhyme or reason.

Yet the Emperor, for all his power, was just one man. Horus the Betrayer, Saint Sebastian Thor, and even humble Ollanius Pius were all just men. You are one man, as am I. Each of us may be saints or sinners, as we make of the lives given us.

I look at you, strong in Warp-borne mutations and diseases, and all I can see is weakness. You were so frail that when hardship bore down on you, and when this harsh reality sunk its claws in, you bargained your immortal soul away for relief from a little pain. Your physical strength cannot hide your spiritual weakness: where better men stood fast and died proudly, you sold out your Emperor and your fellow man for your worthless life.

So come fight me, lost children. We’ve all made our choices, and now those choices have made us. I shall bring you into His light with cleansing flame and prayers, and redeem us all in death. Come one or come all, you shall not put a foot into this hallowed ground while I still draw breath.

For I have faith, and that is enough.

Kravot, Phantom of the Library, oakgem217, The Arid Legion, Thaumologist, ScottPress, Download, Mister Ferro, Longsword, Mishie, Selethe
ScottPress The Horny Sovereign –§ Prestigious §– DLP Supporter

Joined:

Apr 22, 2013

Messages:

39

Gender:

Male

Location:

The Holy Moose Empire

High Score:

6900

Nov 18, 2019 #4480

Sree said:

when you look into your mom's eyes, scott
can you tell how disappointed she is that she has you for a son
Click to expand...

Longsword, Kravot

Page 224 of 228

Loading...

Similar Threads

Funny Pics? No Malarkey!

Arthellion, Dec 2, 2019, in forum: The Humor Mill

Replies:

2,155

Views:

509,418

yargle

Mar 25, 2024
Cool Cosplay Pictures Thread

Andrela, Feb 19, 2016, in forum: The Humor Mill

Replies:

213

Views:

85,129

Psychotic Cat

Nov 23, 2021
Official Funny Pics Part 2

Antivash, Jun 2, 2011, in forum: The Humor Mill

Replies:

1,998

Views:

642,399

Oz

Feb 18, 2012
Funny Pictures Thread

madeyemoody, Dec 20, 2006, in forum: The Humor Mill

Replies:

5

Views:

3,908

Dark Minion

Dec 27, 2006
Inspirational Pictures

madeyemoody, Feb 26, 2006, in forum: The Humor Mill

Replies:

7

Views:

8,212

Assassinator_of_Dumbledor

Mar 31, 2006

Not open for further replies.

Search