I think that someone here once said, in a brit-picking thread, that Brits aren't big on whippin' out the old 'douchebag' insult on people. Give it time though...

I had Hermione call Ron a douchebag (due to his colossal stupidity) in a parody I was fiddling around with. Mostly for the shock value of Hermione saying anything like that.

Beard-o The Clown... If I ever actually publish a single word of the shit I write, I'll have someone refer to Dumbledore by that name, just for you.

 

What about Dumb-Old-Whore? Harry Twater? Prisoner of Ass Cabin? So many possibilities if one just takes the time.

 

All this talk about shrooms...I can just imagine Harry sitting in the backseat of the car at the beginning of Super Troopers, with Fred and George in the front seat, making Harry scarf down all those shrooms and weed before the cops see them.

 

I can see it now; the Twins get someone high and that someone gets the munchies. They eat a handful of Nosebleed Nougats, Puking Pastilles and Ton-Tongue Toffee.

It's a roll o' the dice what ends up killing the poor bastard: suffocating on his tongue, bleeding to death or aspirating to death on his own vomit.

Just say no, kids. Wheezes and drugs don't mix.

 

...

Am I the only one who like my Harry a little classier than that?

 

No you're not. Those are very lame insults Mr. Hyphen.

 

No self respecting independent Harry would use horrible puns as names for the people he supposedly hates.

I started reading a fic a couple of days ago that i have probably read in the past sometime but this time the sheer amount of cliched shit in it made me laugh.
I don't remember the name of the fic, i think i found it in some authors favourite stories on FF.net, but it had Harry getting a super awesome trunk with fuckloads of compartments, one of which was a mansion, another was a library. There were notes from his parents incase they died before they got to tell him stuff, then it turned out the trunk was made by merlin who turns out to be related to Harry.
Then Harry got a special portkey to take him to gringotts to avoid the manipulative Dumbledore, where Harry proceeded to be on first name terms with the head Goblin and saw Griphook and recognised him. Then Harry inherited loads of money and houses and shit, and he went to live in Potter Castle, where he had loads of house elves working for him that were free elves becaue of course the Potter family is nice to its elves. Then Harry started studying from books in his trunk and became insanely powerufl over the course of the summer.

Then i had to stop reading because i had overdosed on cliches

 

This pisses me off to no end. No, it isn't cool to make up fucktard names for your enemies. I call Voldemort Voldemort, because someone who can kick your ass twenty different ways without trying deserves respect.

 

I know their lame, I was kinda making fun of all the authors who use names like that........