Atleast Harry's drop in power is given a reason for now. It was stupid when Harry was just holding his own against some nobody death eater.

I hope it's some super-extended burning day too, some unnamed curse sounds lame.

Chapter 4 was a major improvement over the last 3 (the first was expository, the second was too historical, and the third was just a lot of fluff-action). Still I don't understand Harry though. First he says he needs to get home, then he wants to join the DA, knowing full well that it's counterproductive.

At least with this murder subplot Harry has a reason to be angry and kick some ass. I'm hoping Harry can get over this bullshit "I gotta get out of this universe" idea and just deal with the fact he's stuck there until Grindewald is dead. Perhaps that's what the summary of chapter 5 is alluding to.

I hope chapter 6 doesn't take forever and a half to write (although to be fair, serpant-sorc writes a ton of quality in only 2 months).

 

Jono updated again. I like reading about some one other than Voldemort, being the main antagonist. 5/5 for me.

 

It was a good chapter. Not the best but it has set the scene for the both the big "action" sequence. I hope Harry finally becomes more like the Dark Knight because they have been the best parts of the series.

Sometimes it goes on in parts and Harry can be a proper wimp at times but this is still one of the best series out there. Hopefully the new "Dark Lord" is not just a Voldie clone.

4.8/5

 

This was a good chapter. I'm glad that the plot points we're familiar with from OotP are nearing an end. It felt like a cop out to have everything so similar to Harry's world when most of the major players are completely different people. That should be over within the next couple of chapters. Hopefully kickass Harry will be making a full return in the next chapter.

While it's a great idea, it's also nice that Harry's burning day is over.

On the next chapter, Jono did post the following on his website:

Oh well.

 

The side-tracking and "organization protecting the warp stone" was stupid (his trip to see the woman).

The rest of the chapter was great, Riddle was done well. The fact that Harry will be fighting in a full fledged battle once more is great news.

Was it ever mentioned how Sirius was related to Katie? Was it just assumed Sirius became friends with Katie's father instead of Harry's? Otherwise... how would he be Katie's god-father? I wonder if Jono will kill him off despite Harry's attempts.

 

The only hint we are given is that Katie said something like "It's serious". I don't remember any other reference to Sirius Black in this book. Perhaps she really did say "serious" and it's someone other than Black who is in danger.

 

Btw: There are only very few Christians in Turkey - very strange that Harry finds a church...
Even then, the priests there don't wear black.

 

Is it ever said that Sirius IS Katie's godfather? I mean, for all we know, Katie rescued him with buckbeak, and then just became good friends. Maybe Katie just wants to rescue him because she's a friend of his.

 

Perhaps so... Harry was the one thinking of Sirius, it was never mentioned by Katie. Interesting twist if it isn't Sirius after all.

 

This story would be good and all if harry potter had a FKEN BRAIN. It drags on way to much, and harry is WAY TOO STUPID. Reading his stupidity just makes me soo pissed. Oh, and also, TOO SLOW! 2/5 for effort.

EDIT: why is this in time travel? Move to Alternate please mods

 

This an Ararkia are the only fics I read now, and given Anarkia seems to get an annual update I am left with just this.

It will be good to see the Dark Knight reappear and hopefully Harry remembers to use those cool shield spells he got from the original Dark Knight in the Unholy Land.

There is likely to be a reason for Jono to go on a tangent to about the key stones and the organistation protecting them. Rememeber this is part two of a trilogy he is writing.

 

Now, why was i banned for stating my pure opinion? A bit unfair don't you guys think. Well you said "Maybe next time" This is my next time, and heres what i say: This story is slow and until chapter 6, essentially saying nothing. I'd advise readers to skip the first 5 chapters if it gets too boring as there is little important plot there. Still 2/5.

And mods, please do not abuse your powers. Banning for no reason and no warning is hardly fair. And please, the mod which banned me, PM me as i would like to know purely why you did so. I admit i have little power over the mods, but surely such action cannot be let loose without consequences? Who will watch the watchers? (Cliche i know)

 

A Cupspeaker eh?


The first 5 chapters set up the 6th fool. It would be terrible for chapter 6 to have Harry arriving in the promised land and then running straight to the DoM to fight. The first 5 chapters built up the situation of this world, who the Dark Lord was, what happened to Dumbledore and Riddle as well as Harry's quest to return to his world.

 

I, for one, am grateful for the professional distance the author keeps from the protagonist. Too many others write established characters as though they were undeclared self-inserts or author avatars.

 

I finally got caught up on the sequel here. And while "lightemoguy" appears severely retarded and incapable of expressing himself helpfully, I agree with the spirit of his declaration.

Harry Potter is, from what I can tell, the stupidest character in this entire series. Every other character shows at least passing intelligence and understanding. But Harry is beyond aggravatingly dumb and immature. "Riddle is evil, I know it. This isn't my fight. I shouldn't interfere. Of course everything in this world is playing out EXACTLY as the one I know, but still it's not my fight. Of course I'll spy on Katie and want to get into the DA just because I want to see if she's as good a teacher as me. Yes, I'll creepily watch the girls in her dorm sleep, but I won't tell her about essence of murlap to help her hand. And oh look, there's an electrical outlet and I have a fork..."

For god's sake, Jono. We're supposed to like Harry or at least root for him to win. Right now, I'd rather his brain get fried, turned to mush, and then maybe the evil/original Dark Knight can take over. Because I wouldn't trust this Harry to figure out how to open an automatic door.

I suppose he's aiming to make Harry a "real" teenager. You know, basically someone nobody really likes. Someone impulsive, stupid, and completely unable to relate to anyone younger or older than him. Someone you happily wave goodbye to for a couple of years and hope than when you see him again, he won't be the useless wretch of a human that he is right now. Essentially, a very average and typical teenager.

There's something wrong when I like every other character more than I like Harry. And it's not that he seems about a fifth of the wizard he was by the end of the last story. Regardless of his messed up magic, or the mysterious wizard whose nearly kicked his ass a couple times. At least that Harry had a clue. He'd make a decision, and work his ass off to carry out a course of action. This one is so all over the place and such an idiot that it just becomes a drag to even read.

This chapter ended at a very nice crucial spot where hopefully the story will take off in a mildly compelling direction. But after reading the last few, I think again I'd rather wait until there are at least four or five new chapters rather than one.

I wouldn't care so much if there wasn't so much potential in this storyline. Several aspects of the first story were brilliant, and it's always been handled reasonably well by a decently skilled writer. But with a Harry like this, it's a chore to even read.

What was once 4.5 or 5 out of 5, is now much closer to a 3/5. And if it continues as its been going I can see that rating going even lower.

 

I agree with nonjon's review. And he didn't even get into Harry's brilliant plan to lay low by periodically giving Katie suspiciously pertinent bits of Yoda-like advice (while captivating her with his brilliant gaze, natch), and then acting like a total moron the rest of the time.

 

Exactly what I think. I even told Jono so much on his Yahoo group, but got run off it by the rabid fans who don't allow their favourite story to be criticised.

I suppose Jono is making Harry weak and stupid at the beginning of Promised Land, undoing all the apparent progress and knowledge Harry gained in the Unholy Land, because otherwise Harry would be pretty strong and there would be not much peril unless he was facing the big bad. This way he can once again go through a natural progression of increasing strength as the fic goes by until it reaches a climax, at which point Harry will once again presumably jump worlds and go back to point 0.

I understand his motivation for doing it, but that doesn't change the fact that its utter crap and poor authorship. The story has no consistency from Unholy land over to Promised Land.

 

Exactly. It's like he learned nothing. All he's concerned about is getting back to his world or the 'unholy' land. He even hatched a brief scheme to try and trick Hermione into doing some really complicated arithmancy? I mean we established Albus is dead, as are the Potters, but has he even attempted to see if the nearest thing to an expert in the "node" field (not to mention his Occlumency teacher/mentor) Flamel lives in this world? Probably not, but still.

Too many of Harry's actions just end up as pointless wastes of time that reading about them feels like a pointless waste of time.