It's truly amazing that the first actual student fatality was Diggory. From Quirriddle, Hagrid sending eleven-year-old children into the Forbidden Forest to look for unicorn-murderers, basilisks and dementors and dragons...

 

I'm surprised about it all too, but the Children's Book excuse works here.

My school is one of the best in New Zealand, for girls only, and we constantly have little rich boarding girls getting rat arsed on the weekends.

I get the feeling that because it was told from Harry's point of view, that's why we wouldn't see a lot of the abuse.

Hypothesized Addictions of Choice:

Ravenclaws: Wit Sharpening potions mixed with Felix Felicis. (Except Luna; she's on hallucinogenics)
Gryffindors: Vodka and Firewhiskey. It's not that hard to make Vodka (speaks from experience) and I'm sure the older students would buy Firewhiskey over the holidays for resale.
Hufflepuffs: Weed. They are the stoners of the magical world. Also, Sprout can supply at low cost.
Slytherins: Muggle drugs and alcohol. Rich kids want to rebel. End of story.

 

Ummm.. the way I remember it, Hagrid Sent The Boys Off in one direction, then went and searched a different area.

I'm always going to wonder *exactly* how thoroughly restrained those dragons actually were. Did JKR ever say that they were harmless? "Supervised by experts" sounds nice and safe, but these were nesting mothers - and they didn't realise that the champions weren't a threat.

Did the parents of the muggleborn victims of the basilisk receive any notification that their children were in the Hospital wing, petrified? The first victim was at Halloween, right? So, at least one child was petrified for over half a year. Did he get special summer tutoring to make up for lost school time? Or would the victim simply have to self-study as best he could?

 

LMAO...



...Pure genius

 

DE children: unicorn blood
sixteen-year-old boys: gillyweed and mermaid attractant
sixteen-year-old girls: amortentia with cosmetic charms
divinations freaks: cannabis brownies with a touch of LSD
Quidditch beaters: steroids mixed with PCP
Quidditch seekers: amphetamines

Dennis and Colin Creepy: Harry-specific Amortentia, with invisibility potions

 

Actually, that's just the Northern mermaids (Scottish Selkies and Irish Merrows). The Mediterranean mermaids (sirens) are much more beautiful. 'Tis all in Fantastic Beasts.

 

And what beautiful eggs you lay!

Aekiel

 

I'm thinking a Futurama style misunderstanding might happen in that case...

The only decent Mermaid!Smut in Potter fiction is Big D's contribution to the Thank God You're Here thread. Because there, they are naked, and plentiful, and thankfully for Neville, not another manatee.

 

A manatee or sea cow looks like this:

 

She's smiling cause she got some...

 

All I know is that I would have liked the Harry Potter series a lot less if JKR had written about Harry struggling with his drug addiction following Sirius' death.

 

Perhaps, Andro...but at least then we'd have a more plausible excuse for Harry to lay in bed all day, for days at a time...coming down would be a bitch when you can't easily access headache potions, dreamless sleep potions, or even give yourself a cheering charm to combat the side-effects.