I hate
H/G
Slashes
Snape/anyone, especially snape/harry or hermione
Draco/anyone
Dumbledore/anyone
And why hasn't anyone mentioned Voldemort/hermione or Snape? I was scarred for life when I used to read stories randomely regardless of pairing and came across a Voldemort/Hermione.

 

Way to necro, mate. I hope you realise several people are going to come here and yell at you soon. General rule, I'm sure it's written down somewhere, don't post in a thread over a month old. It's common sense not to post in year+ old threads... Or at least I assumed it was.

Aekiel

 

Actually, my two MOST hated 'ships are in the Stargate fandom. I HATE McKay/Carter 'ships: the guy is a condescending jerk, and Sam has more spine than to take it. My next most hated ship is Sam/Jack, mostly because if I read, "Just for a moment, their eyes met across the briefing room table, silently acknowledging the feelings that cruel regs forbade," One More Time, I'll be ill.

In HP, I don't like Harry/Ginny because she simply isn't very special. She goes from crush-on-a-title, to stupidly refusing to get help, to completely irrelevant, to suddenly-PERFECT-IN-EVERY-WAY. It really bothers me.

Ron and Hermione: why would they want each other? His main interest is Quidditch, and she finds it boring. Her intelligence turns him off.

I'm a woman - I read gay sex. Well-written male-male sex arouses me. Deal with it. I like Harry/Draco and Harry/Ron. Rivals developing trust and respect for each other, or friends slowly becoming more leaves me feeling warm and happy.

I can see Draco/Ginny - they have what each other wants. He's rich with a taste for showing off and she's pureblood, with an EXCELLENT chance for breeding several children. And Tonks has made pink hair Cool.

Abusive-teacher-Snape with defenseless-under-age-student revolts me.

I refuse to view The Umbitch as a being with reproductive organs. Period.

 

Pairings I hate...

Harry/Ginny. Unless the fic is recommended to me as being truly fantastic I won't touch it. This ship has been done to death and taken over by rabid fangirls.

Harry/Hermione. Majority of these fics have Hermy as an encyclopedia of every useful and bullshit piece of information. I can't stand that.

Ron/Hermione. He's a retarded, jealous prick. She can somehow divide by zero. Whatever people say opposites do NOT attract.

Tonks/Lupin. Apart from me hating Lupin she can do so much better than that pussy of a beggar.

Slash. I'm a straight male, enough said.

Snape/Anyone. Any friction going on there will set the oily poof alight.



There are other pairings I abhor but these are the most common ones. Now to go off-topic and list some pairings that will keep me reading a shitty story.

Harry/Bella. As long as she doesn't come begging for forgiveness or some shit like that.

Harry/Narcissa. Very few stories that make this pairing work, but I'm a fanboy of hers.

Harry/Katie Bell. Have no idea why I like her but I do. Very few fics with this pairing though.

Honks. She's awesome, nothing else to it. Unfortunately this is another area where the fangirls are trying to get their grimy, prepubescent little hands on, ruining it for everyone.

Harry/Fem!Blaise. JKR made one of the biggest fuck-ups by putting her down as a guy.

Harry/Daphne. I'm a sucker for Slytherin chicks, as long as they don't associate themselves with Malfoy.

Harry/Tracey Davis. See above.

 

Um, okay. I 'spose if lesbians arouse straight men, the opposite should be true...

Mine?

-Harry/Ginny
-Ron/Hermione
-Snape/Anyone
-Ginny/Draco
-Ron/Luna
-Lupin/Tonks
-Slash
-Harems

You can guess the one I like.

 

Harry/Professor Sinistra?

 

The smart money's on Snape/Anyone

 

Yup.

The Patil twins? Cho/Lavender?

 

Snape/Lily
H/G
Tonks/Remus - I'm sick of it
Remus/Anybody - Sick of Remus
Sirius/Anybody - Serious relationships. Sirius can be a ladies man, or whatever, but serious relatinships = no.
Tonks/Anybody - I've never seen a good Tonks romance, even HONKS
Voldemort/Anybody
Pettigrew/Anybody

Snape/female that isn't a student - doesn't bother me. Hermione/Lily aside, I've never seen someone do any romance with Snape, and it could be potentially good –*especially if it made Snape a better character.
Snape/Everybody else - hate

Everything else is pretty obvious no <3 for slash etc. ron/herm luna/ron luna/neville etc.

 

I can respect that.

Well, nobody's perfect...
Seriously though, canon Ron isn't worthy of Harry or Hermione either one and the notion of Harry wanting to be within a hundred miles of canon Draco is mind-boggling. Any fanfic author would have their work cut out for them to realistically make that one work. I'd go on to make a comment about most slash fic being utter crap but... to be fair, most fic, in general, is crap.

Or put another way: I'd go on to make a comment about most slash fic being utter crap but... H/G. 'Nuff said.

But if she has no reproductive organs how can she even have a peri- Oh. Never mind, my mistake. Everyone just move along, there's nothing to see here.

There are plenty of pairings I hate. These are but a few.

Severus/Anyone - even his own hand would reject him

Ron/Hermione - He's a worthless retard who doesn't respect anything Hermione is about, she doesn't hate herself enough to subject herself to that. That's all there is to it.

Draco/Hermione - I'd scream out my hate for this pairing, but the bile has risen too far up in my throat for me to do so, without puking.

Tonks/Lupin - Damn you, Rowling. Between this and R/Hr, you make the Taliban look like progressive supporters of female empowerment.

Any of Harry's peers/All Three Good Marauders - Wait, you thought Harry/Harem was a shameless masturbation fantasy? At least he didn't have to go back in time before his actual birth to find his bed buddies (And he didn't destroy a perfectly good time-line to do it. You're breaking up the future savior's parents, you dumb bitch. Enjoy your apocalypse.).

Lily/All Three Good Marauders - James doesn't share and somehow I doubt that the girl who thought he was a pig would be interested in servicing two more of the same. Bottom line, she doesn't pull a train for a group of guys that thought cruel pranks were funny.
Sirius was, quite literally, a shameless hound dog and Remus... was a pathetic douche who probably didn't get his end wet until he eventually gave up on being a castrato because a girl who fell and hit her head one too many times finally forced herself on him due to the swelling in her brain.

I'm interested in what Lily said to Remus in the afterlife.
"When I'd done everything else I could to protect my child, I died for my him rather than step aside. How about you, Remus?"
"Er, well, first I tried to abandon my wife and newborn child, then I was stupid enough to have my wife and I both go to the battle, leaving my child an orphan."
"Remus, you suck. On a related note, you're being transferred to a section of Purgatory that overlooks Severus's corner of Hell. Enjoy the afterlife."

Lily/Snape - Die you fucking pieces of shit. Just die.

Voldemort/Anyone - especially Hermione. Come on, people, even Ginny has more sense than that.

Male Death Eater/'Light Side' Female - Every single author who tackles this one is too lazy to put in the work to make this coupling look even remotely feasible (though I readily admit, I wouldn't read it anyway). In light of that, they should stop even pretending to try. Even Hellatrix writers have a few flimsy excuses for why Harry and Bellatrix would get involved but these people can't seem to be bothered.

Draco/Blaise/Hermione or Harry - This horse shit fad came out of nowhere to inundate fandom.

Any Child from The Epilogue/Another Child from The Epilogue - Albus Severus/Scorpius is just Harry/Draco with a new label. The same holds true for Victoire, Rose or Lily/Scorpius (Hr, G or LL/Draco). They just suck, nobody cares, and the characters shouldn't be allowed to exist anyway.

Oliver Wood/Anyone - Who gives a shit about this guy? Seriously, he spent less than five seconds around any of Harry's peers before he left school.

Dumbledore/Anyone - Offended by Albus's homosexuality? Hell no! I'm offended by the notion that he isn't completely asexual.

HogwartsBicycycle!Minerva/Tom Riddle and/or Dumbledore - I swear, in almost any fic that mentions she's banged one of them, she's actually banged the other as well. Please, leave Minnie her dignity.

slave!whore!Harry/The Entire Fucking Wizarding World - Harry would destroy Wizarding Britain and the rivers would run red with the blood of those who angered him if anyone ever tried to turn him into some kind of whore who was oath-bound to take whatever abuse the population decided to dish out.
Seriously, the gods would weep and the Earth would crack before this happened.

 

Warlocke, you wouldn't find that in a serious fic, just in the WTF fics thread.

Unless I spoke too soon, in which case leave my innocence intact. Think of the children.

 

The same could be said for R/Hr. Bwahahahaha!

I think not. Everyone should have to feel my pain.

I'm actually quite shy. Am I getting a reputation here or something? Hehe.

Crap, how could I forget to mention...

Harry/Ginny - If for no other reason than that it is so played out that I can't even pretend to be interested in any story featuring this pairing. Yes, canon Ginny is even more worthless than her brother, Ron, but good authors have presented tolerable, even likable, versions of Ginny in their stories.

Too bad the few decent authors' stories are absolutely drowning in a flood of shit, filled with Ginny clones that are even worse than canon (you'd better believe it's possible).

I guess I forgot to mention it because it goes without saying.

 

http://forums.darklordpotter.net/member.php?u=4142

 

Well, YES, I do know your prefered pairing. H/Hr is my favorite, too. But be fair - it's so much fun to pick on you.

 

I can't believe you betrayed the Harry/Sinistra crusade.

Oh and what Banner said.

All right, not all of what Banner said. Cut the H/Hr is my favourite,too. Replace it with Harry/Fleur is my favourite pairing, and all will soon realise Fleur is the only possible partner for Harry. But keep the rest of what she said.

 

I don't like Harry/Fleur because I hate having to wade through her accent. JBern's Fleur is one of the few characterizations I can enjoy. So is "Gene Spliced Harry."
Most Fleur and Hagrid portrayals simply irritate me - I tend to skim their dialogue.

 

Ah, but Fleur's accent can be worked around. It is annoying to read pages of "'arry" but she can learn English, or French words can be inserted into her sentences every now and then to maintain her French allegiance.

Hagrid is a filthy half-breed. I don't like him either.

 

Isn't Fleur also a "filthy half-breed"?