I second that.

 

To part about infuriation, or the part about marathon runners?

Just trying to clarify.

 

Good stuff. I just blew through both fics yesterday (Saturday).

Nitpick: You seem to repeat certain words a great deal ('snorted' comes to mind ATM)

Also, you're battles are very good, and I could be completely alone in this opinion, but sometimes you seem to fall in love with ideas and images without quite making sense. (At least to my taste).

In this chapter, for example, when the Lady says, "Wait," you never quite clarify what she is waiting for. There needs to be a tactical advantage to waiting (Pikes, a flanking platoon, something...) otherwise they're just letting the enemy get deeper into their turf. Its one of those moments that we see so often in movies, etc. that seems very cool (massive army freezing together and standing tense as a rival group charges madly at them), but I'm not sure what purpose it served.

Also, I like how things are really coming to a head more in this chapter.

Meciel (making reference to destroying the sword, few chapters insinuating that she would be willing to take Harry's body, early on in the sequel she suggesting during training that Harry might be on his own, etc.) Good way to keep raising the stakes.

At some point Harry will have to choose what he's going to do. Christmas chapter was great at this. Dug that. Nice character work.

 

Ahh.. the wait is over. Just wondering.. Why would Maeve be surprised at Harry? Surprised at his skill in casting without looking? or that he so casually casts AK's?

I'm sure someone will pick it to pieces.. but one thing I noticed

Maybe "it" continued to lumber forward? Unless its Harry doing the lumbering.

 

*Whines* Me wants Harry vs. Voldemort or Harry vs. Vesper! Oh, and what's the point for the bad guys to attack Maeve's Fortress? I don't think Voldemort wants to get Harry's daughter that badly and he and Vesper can't really steal Maeve's power. All they do is pissing off the Winter Court.

 

A new part of the story *does a little dance of joy*.

And what a part. It was very cool starting from the walking hulks of metal to the end. Though you did not tell us who was actually inside that armor. I hope you will later.

As for Harry's daughter, I must admit that was a surprise. I thought Maeve would be pregnant still, or that the child would be a small baby at best. Making her old enough to talk was a clever move. Why is she so creepy anyway? I mean faeries are generally emotional and manipulative.

In any event, I am greatly looking forward to finding out how Harry will deal with this little surprise. And ofcourse for learning what Voldemort and the denarians are upto.

Thanks for writing this despite it being your holiday!

 

Something I noticed was that most writers would use "interior" instead of "inside", and that "though" should be "thought"

and there's a pronoun missing at

but otherwise it was great. Just Harry's luck, to be a father at, what, fifteen.

Just wondering, by the time is relative in the Nevernever concept, wouldn't the girl be older than Harry given a few years?

 

Priceless. I got such a perfect mental image of this little byplay it had me laughing out loud for few minutes.

 

Perhaps because she isn't a sidhe, but a changeling? They act more human than faery. Perhaps she just gets her jollies by mindfucking people...

 

For some reasons I keep having flashes of Wednesday Addams from the TV series: all emotionless and sadistic... I really can't wait to see more from this new character.

 

why am i getting a carrie vibe?

in any case, glad to have you back in the saddle, shezza. the place just wasn't the same without you.

creepy little girls....bring 'em on. i eat them for breakfast, with a nice chianti and some fava beans.

 

I always thought that the time variation was going in both way in the Nevernever, sometimes more and sometimes less, so I got the impression that on larger time period the whole thing was pretty balanced, that's why I was so surprised to see Harry's daughter at that age.
Anyway, it's not very important, great part, I hope to see more soon.

 

That is going to be one epic custody court battle.

 

Are you sure Harry would want to take custody over that Ice Princess? And don't forget about Meciel's say in it.

 

Got to agree on the Daughter thing, just don't turn Harry uh, how do I put this, yeah that will work, don't turn Harry into another Nicodemus.

 

There were MILFs in the cabin,
And lolis in the hold;
The sails were made of pretties,
And the masts of centerfolds.

 

So is the daughter gonna be the catalyst for Harrys change to a mature, productive member of society? If so; KILL IT WITH FIRE!
(Maybe after some sexy loli rape )

 

Great update Shezza, but I have to agree with oz, it's not nearly long enough.
Oh well, enjoy what's left of your holidays, be lazy while you still can (read: before rabid fans find out where you live).

I just loved the last scene, even though I kinda saw it coming

 

Epic. Seriously, you win the internet.

How does Harrys daughter survive battle when shes like, 5 months old? Also, have you named her yet? I may have missed it but I can't be bothered reading through it again right now