Yeah Why her? Why not her? why not someone else? My point is the reason he gave was that she was the only non-OC other than Pansy (when we have agreed that she is OC), I would like a reason why he chose Bulstrode over someone else.

 

This is the last time I will be clarifying about Millicent, so do try to read what I have already written before flying off the handle.

You were the one who had problems with her half blood status, even though it was mentioned by JKR in one of her interviews that she is a half blood. Since you made the statement that her half blood status is in question, the burden of proof is on you.

As for Umbridge, her primary motive in OotP is to discredit Potter and Dumbledore because they were opposed to the Ministry version of the events at the end of GoF. In that light, one cannot regard Millie as a blood purist. Not even all Death Eaters are purebloods.

I already told you that I did not get my info from the HP-Lexicon - I gave you the info straight from CoS and my notes of it, which is why I had missed her black hair (which they had noticed). The only parts that coincide is where we both quote the canon. You would know this if you really did compare their language with mine.

Secondly, even if it is true that I took my info from the HP-Lexicon, which it is not, how does it affect the knowledge of Millie that we do have? We know of her aggression, and her favour for physical attacks over magical battles. You keep harping that they are functions of her fatness and/or ugliness. Please explain how you derive the one from the other - prevarications will not serve.

Finally, we have a rough picture - caricature though it be - of Millicent - a strongly built girl, aggressive, not too magically powerful, and one of Umbridge's lackeys. It serves as a basis. If your definition of `canon character' is only if every facet of a character be explained, then she is an OC. But we do have a rough sketch of the character we are trying to build.

Oh - and if you feel you must have the last word in this discussion, feel free to do so. I will not be explaining this again.
Regards,
Maidros

 

I didn't say Bulstrode was a purist I said Umbridge was, and she picked who was in the 'squad'.

And is it the 'Edit' part your not seeing in that 'Copy-Paste-Edit'?

Infact, don't answer that, I don't care.

 

I rather like this one. I've been following it for a while now, because I'm somewhat fond of the author's other stories. That having been said, it does have some flaws, so I'll give it a 4/5.

 

Great story. I'm always up for a good politic!harry and smart/observant!harry. Both together is a plus. I love the direction the story is going so far. I've read a ton of SS/PS rewrites, but this one is pretty unique. I like the characterization of Dumbledore and the lack of your common indy!harry and manipulative!dumbledore cliches except for the mail withholding which doesn't bother me. There's only so many times you can take the dumbledore robbing harry, memory/skill blocks, ron/hermione spies, etc. I do wish the author wouldn't include Ron in Harry's circle of friends as I hate Ron and believe he is one of the most useless characters in HP. It seems like he exists solely to distract Harry from what is important (in canon anyways). Any fic where Harry turns on Ron automatically gets my approval.


Anyways, I hope this story gets updated regularly.

4.5/5

 

I just checked out the latest updates for this one, and I've got to say that the story (overall) impresses me. Smart Harry with a hunger for knowledge, and who won't be manipulated without opening up other doors for himself. His choices to turn down the first year quidditch try-outs and continue training with flyers from at least three houses was a good way to earn a good reputation, but unusual for an 11 year old boy; other than that, Harry does come off as a smart, resourceful, believable 11 year old.

Other than that, this Dumbledore seems more petty than truly manipulative. He's concerning himself with isolating Harry through public opinion via the student body...when he could be manipulating Harry himself, which would be the better choice if he's so good at it.

One shining spot in this faculty is Minerva McGonogall. I like that she isn't an unquestioning follower, and seems capable of making concsious choices on her own. I hope she gets a bigger role as we get further in.

Quirrel is also a good point in this tale. His rationale of corrupting Harry is a good one, especially if he's giving him the knowledge and teaching him the skills he wants to develop. Good way to introduce Fluffy, too.

While the major plotline still revolves around the Philosopher's Stone, I doubt this will turn into another recycled version. The author actually seems to have a plan in mind, and is making his own mark on the story already. It'll be fun to see where it goes.

 

Dumbledore is more than just petty (although he was never a nice person either). He has a plan for Harry and sees no need to rush his timetable - everything in due course. Further, there was a major piece of actual manipulation in the latest chapter. With a careful reading, you should be able to spot it without difficulty.

Thanks for the encouragement, and thanks for reading and reviewing.
With regards,
Maidros

 

Chapter 14 is up, and we have a very different Troll incident to enjoy. Harry and Hermione are still involved, but you won't find a Weasley near that bathroom (even though if we were judging by Ron's intelligence, the Troll could fit).

Maidros shows a flaw in Hermione's loner-like habits of studying, and puts emphasis on group efforts instead...much more believable than canon, really. Harry's group of friends each have their own devoted disciplines and interests, which helps not only during studying, but also as they work to figure out who Flamel is, and why he'd hide anything of importance at a school for children. Harry and his friends also provide a good example of human error--overlooking the obvious answer.

No Dumbledore mentioned here, but it will be quite interesting to see how this McGonogall handles the students vs. Troll incident, as she's proven to be an independent thinker, quite capable of making her own decisions. Sprout's reaction as the 'Puff head of House should be interesting, too.

Also new to Harry Potter...evidence of strategy and thinking on the go. If that appeals to you, give this a read.

All that said, it looks like we will mostly be following the same major plot-line of the original PS. I was hoping for more originality, but this has its own original concepts, and is an interesting read; more than we can say for the large majority of HP fanfiction being written during the last few years. Good job, Maidros.

 

(Sighs softly) I have been trying to make Ron a little more palatable - the problem is that Ron has really very few redeeming qualities. I guess I should try harder.

Teamwork is necessary in this case. None of them have anywhere near the power and/or knowledge of the vaunted of the wizarding world. With differing skills, and talents, they will be better able to fight back against the high and the mighty of the wizarding world. I am not sure what I am going to do with Hermione though - she has talent, determination, diligence and loyalty, but she is too bossy and self-righteous, not to mention a worshipper of Dumbledore's authority.

Both Minerva and Sprout will figure prominently in the coming chapter - it should be ready in a few days.

I have seen very few examples of teamwork and strategic/tactical planning in fanfiction. The obvious exceptions would be `Only Enemies' and JBern's fics. It is almost as if it is a hack-and-slash gore fest in most cases.

While the plot may revolve around the philosopher's stone, its resolution will be very different. Thanks for the commendation, and thanks for reading and reviewing.
With regards,
Maidros

 

This one bored me a bit. Not good, not bad, but tolerable. 3.7/5

 

Hello folks,
I am entering a critical part of this story. I would be grateful for a beta reader. Since this community does not pull punches, I am posting this request here first. If any of you are interested, please post here, or send me a PM. Don't worry about being harsh in your criticism - I am not going to be offended (comes with being a researcher in RL, I guess). My main interest is in people going over the logic of the plot. I can handle the grammar and spelling myself, although any help in that area is welcome as well.

Thanks in advance,
Regards,
Maidros

 

Maidros has updated his story a few times since April. Some good stuff to be found, along with the certainty that this is not going to be a canon re-hash.

 

Updated again. Very intriguing, especially comparing the post war purebloods with post 1899 Boers.

The trust dynamic between Lucius, Narcissa and Snape is interesting.

Hermione is perfectly portrayed. For a while, I wanted to bitchslap her and explain what purebloods do to annoying mudblood c**ts.

 

Congratulations! You are the first one to get that historical reference accurately. There is one major difference with the Boer context, though. Imagine a Cecil Rhodes (I don't have to tell you Rhodes' counterpart in the Potter-verse, do I?) not diminished by the failed Jameson's raid and usurping the place of Alfred Milner and you will get a rough parallel with the Potter-verse contemporary with my own story.

Snape is playing a superb double game. Narcissa does not trust him, but then she does not trust anyone fully. Lucius agrees with Narcissa's logic, but he cannot bring himself to deal with mudbloods.

Thanks. Hermione is the bossy know-it-all and she can never stop herself from interfering in everyone's business.

 

The thing is, in JKR's world the Death Eaters are fascist aristocrats who, not content with their legal political and economic stranglehold on British magical society, become terrorists to defend their "natural right" to rape and kill lesser races: killing mudbloods and letting halfbloods be the working class, in their thousand year Reich.
In my understanding of the British empire's colonialist actions, a people from an island in north-west Europe has pillaged half the world to bring cheap stuff to Britain while starving millions in India, stealing whatever they could bring back home, killing local aristocracy and playing local rulers against each other, all in a game against the other European powers, with whom they had changing alliances to always gang up on the strong one.
After driving the dutch farmers from the coast of South Africa in order to make it a safe haven for British naval trade on the way to and from India (before Suez), they have used scorched earth policy to take over diamond and gold mining on the Boers' land.
I claim Cecil Rhodes was no better than Mussolini or Goebbels. The British empire is responsible for more human suffering, in the Caribbean, in Africa, in south Asia, around Afghanistan and in my country than Joseph Stalin and Adolf Hitler combined. The only difference in how history remembers them is that Stalin and Hitler killed mostly white people, and a lot of western history was written by Churchill and American colonialists.
And no, I'm not a communist.
You're portraying the Death Eaters as the good guys. As if they were really fighting to protect their way of life against outside aggression and after losing in 1981 they faced Azkaban or deportation to a penal colony in Ceylon. In fact, they were the murderers, they lost to the police, they did not lose their wizengamot seats, their manors or much of their gold, and they could continue raising their children the way Draco was raised.
So yeah, Bella is insane and did not want to surrender. I understand. But the choice was to either continue fighting and end up dead or in Azkaban, or go back to their life before the war – no prison sentences, no reparations to wizards or muggles killed and injured, only the shame of losing, which, by 1992 at least, Lucius has obviously left behind. Not such a hard choice, unless you're a true fanatic.
What evil did your Dumbledore do to people who are not Potters?

Re: Snape. Narcissa is going head to head with Dumbledore. How can she not suspect Snape to be more loyal to the old man that to her? It's Dumbledore's pet Death Eater!

Is reading about the war enough, or does Hermione need to be raped to learn to shut up? I hope she is gang raped by the entire Slytherin house and their parents, turns Dark, and Harry has to put her down like a mad dog.

 

Can snakes roar?

 

Cecil Rhodes never went around murdering people wantonly, if for no other reason than that killing what he could use beneficially (to him) went against the needs of what is `good business'. While I hold no admiration for the ruthless methods he employed, he never went in for mass murder at any stage in his life. He tried to seize and digest as much of southern Africa as he could, much as any conqueror has done- the British were, as far as he was concerned, just another tool for the purpose, and you can observe his disdain for the `Imperial factor' in his speeches. He had a dream for African conquest. If you look back into history, almost every conquest has brought misery to the conquered.

The Death Eaters are NOT the good guys. They are racist bastards, for most part. In fact, I think I have made clear that Lucius (a non-rabid Death Eater) still hates the muggles and muggleborn, and that even Nott and Narcissa have no particular affection for the muggleborn. This part parallels the Boer attitude - the Boers did have a special contempt for the native African population, and even at the end of the Boer war, disenfranchisement of the native African population was one of the key demands for rapproachment. Milner and Chamberlain went ahead with that. The Cape British, for all their sins, were not guilty of following an overtly racist policy as the Transvaalers were. Cape British allowed all groups to vote based on pure property qualifications.

Boers were not harshly punished AFTER the Boer war either, if I remember correctly. The conduct of the British during the war was pretty reprehensible, though.

As for Dumbledore in my story, I won't spoil things for you, but he has a vision for the wizarding world, and he is trying to achieve it by any and all means possible. He has done a lot of damage to plenty of people as you will find out. Changing the world is never an easy or pleasant job.

Narcissa suspects Snape, but Snape is useful to Lucius. Snape's real loyalties are unknown to most people at the moment. Snape is a good double agent, after all.

Ah - well, Hermione will learn; I am inclined to take a more sympathetic view of her. She needs time to understand and emerge from her own rectitude.

They can figuratively

 

They payed taxes to the British and the diamonds and gold went to the British. Basically instead of working to make themselves rich they worked to keep the Britain rich. Mucho fun. This did not happen to the Death Eaters - they basicaly didn't lose much for failing to exterminate mudbloods and enslave halfbloods. Look at the restoration after the American civil war - I don't think people from different sides of the barricades would cooperate this well ten only years after. Like Amelia Bones or Mrs. Longbottom would never speak to Narcissa.

I imagine a cobra with its hood expanded and hissing at you to be like a roar.

 

There is some truth and justification in your claim, but the fact remains that even before the Boer war, the mining magnates (the Randlords) were almost invariably British, French or German. The Boers scarcely had any real presence in the mining industry (there were about 6000 Boers in the capital of the mining industry, Johannesburg, which was a town of around 50,000 and almost all the Boers were impoverished peasants, and not the Randlords). The Boers essentially dominated the countryside and were basically farmers, hunters and small traders.

Quite true again, although I am seeing their loss more in terms of manpower than political or economic power. The Lestranges were all but wiped out, the Rosiers, the Wilkes, and the Crouches were on their last legs, the Blacks pushed to the brink of extinction. Political and economic powers matter only if you are alive to wield it.

As for the mistrust, it exists. Amelia Bones and Minerva McGonagall still dislike and distrust Narcissa and are suspicious of her schemes. But they cannot afford to let Harry Potter fall into the hands of the pureblood crowd. In fact, I think I mentioned that Minerva was very discomfited when the Malfoys turned up on Harry's birthday. But they cannot afford to sit back and let Harry be abused by the Dursleys either. Finally, there are the neutrals - the ones who took neither side in the previous war (in my case, the immediate families of Daphne Greengrass and Sakarbal Rosier). They are useful as a catalyst to Narcissa in bringing the purebloods together.

Okay - the imagery is excellent. But you get the idea behind it. Brave, yet sneaky and not a Gryffindor or Slytherin.

Thanks for your comments.
Regards,
Maidros

 

A very good story

I was, first, reluctant to read it (because of the pairing, etc...).
But, gradually, I fall in love with the story.

Harry know is clueless about the Wizarding World, want to change but he's just a kid, against older (very older) wizards. This is a good change in comparison with HyperPowerfulSneaky!Harry.

Millicent seems to be nice. If the author keep going, the story will be wonderful.

Note:4/5