shezza:

three words:

kill that bitch.

 

I do like the positive Dumbledore you have written. The evil manipulative Dumbledore is quite cliche by now. Your Dumbledore is much better. Your Dumbledore is also quite intelligent and clever. Which is sorta the point.

The reason I originally suggested that Dumbledore would deny all involvement was simple. If he simply blames the students then at the very worst they will be expelled temporarily. If he protects them by taking the blame however, he will be kicked out of the school. As far as he knows, without him there to protect everyone, Voldemort might attack and kill everyone. I mean what better way to spread terror and announce his return than to attack and slaughter all the muggleborn children and others like that. So in a way, by sacrificing himself to protect a few students from being temporarily expelled, he is placing far more in danger of brutal death. We know he is concerned about this since he asked Harry to protect everyone afterall. So I kinda wonder why he would risk it? It only made sense in canon because it was Harry who was being threatened with expulsion and he was simply too important to lose(prophecy and all).

That being said however, it did occur to me that Dumbledore might easily protect Amanda. Dumbledore does hope that Harry's friendship with her might mellow or even "redeem" him afterall. And since Dumbledore views Harry as extremely important due to the prophecy and all, I could maybe see him throwing himself to the wolves to make sure that she would be there to calm Harry down and so on.

The problem I had with the Malfoy debt was exactly that. Harrys thoughts seemed to indicate that he believed that Malfoy would honor the debt, when anyone who has seen how Malfoy acts should realise that Malfoy would indeed just tell Harry to go "fuck himself". Still given that it wont be addressed its not a big deal.

I liked this chapter well enough. It was not all that long but I did enjoy reading things from Amanda's viewpoint for once and seeing what she truly thinks about Harry.

Don't really have anything else to say given that the chapter was quite short. I did enjoy it, however it was short enough that I already want more!

 

*Fangirl squeak*

I bet you've got the next 6 chapters all written up and hidden away and you just enjoy tormenting us.

But love it, the next scene is going to kick. Ass.

 

wow... I dont think i have ever wanted to read about someone dieing as much as i do now. You must kill Umbridge soon please!

She's been cramping Harry's style all year, let him release all, ALL his frustrations on her in the next one or two chapters!

Also I wanna see Harry and Amanda Bump Uglies already

 

If Dumbledore leaves, Fawkes goes with him. Without Dumbledore and Fawkes around, there's no one to stop Umbridge from banning Harry from taking his OWLs. If that ban goes through, he has absolutely no reason not to kill the entire Ministry of Magic.

 

Absolute tops as always.

Is Amaris in real danger this time? I fucking hope so. Then Maeve can come kick everybody's ass. The battle between the 3 Denarians is pretty good and I like how yuo toned down Amaris' powers a little.

Update soon

 

The fight is shaping up to be really awesome. I think it would be awesome if Amaris were slightly injured - or truly threatened - something that would cause Harry to go ballistic with rage. Whether or not he's a candidate for Father of the Year or not - the sight of his daughter being threatened or injured should be enough cause for his paternal feelings to be, even temporarily, awakened. Maybe have Amanda and Dumbledore see it, and get all sappy about it afterwards!

 

Paternal feelings? ugh... GTFO.

More like he would be scared of the consequences any injury to Amaris might cause from Maeve.

Anyway, great part, as always. Just a few minor mistakes that will be pointed out soon.

 

You 100% sure you're not female?

Nice chapter Shezza, didn't notice to many errors, but I'm hardly the guy for that anyhow.

 

Why is it that most of the Denarians attacked Harry in their demonic forms? Were none of them wizards? I mean given that Harry can throw magic around the way he does, I don't see how effective mostly physical attacks can be. Especially since they would have had no way of knowing that Harry was not carrying the sword. Oh wait, was it because two of them were totally insane? Also why was Vesper not there? Or Voldemort? I assume they are the ones that sent those Denarians after Harry afterall. And if the Denarians could attack Harry in Hogwarts then why not the two of them. With no sword, against both Vesper and Voldemort, Harry would have fallen quickly.

For that matter, what happened to Hogwarts wards? I thought they were supposed to be strong enough to keep out even the Denarians? Don't tell me Harry walked outside of the wards without carrying the sword? That would be very foolish since he knows that Voldemort, Vesper and the Denarians are after him and the only reason he survived the last two encounters with Voldemort was due to the protection of the sword.

You know, why is it that so many of the Weaker Denarians have demonic forms that are actually arguably superiour to Meciels. I mean Vesper could fly and Marchosias has a demonic form that gives him powerfull mental attack abilities. Nicodemus too had a form that allowed flight and could attack independently even. Harry however has bone-wings that are essentially just pointy spikes. Though I suppose now that I think of it, giving Harry a very powerfull form might have been stepping too close to super-Harry and no one wants that. Though thats a poor in-story explanation.

I liked that Amaris did not instantly run away. She does seem in many ways as arrogant as Harry which is quite cool. I did appreaciate however that her attacks did not really seem to do much damage. I mean given that she is Maeves child it makes sense that she could wield magic. However she is still just 8-years old and to have her throw around magic strong enough to take out Fallen Angels would have sucked. I think that would have risked going into the Mary Sue territory with her.

The battle was exciting to read about, but then thats hardly a surprise since you write great action. I am eagerly looking forward to finding out how the battle will end. I hope that Harry will manage to kill atleast one of the attacking Denarians. I am curious to see what he and Meciel would do with one of the coins.

One final question for you Shezza, where is Meciels sigil on Harry? I mean in DF when Dresden touched the coin it caused a permanent imprint of Lasciels sigil on his hand. And when Nicodemus manifested even a part of his form to fly, a sigil appeared in his forehead. Why is it that we have never seen Harry have a sigil somewhere or for a glowing sigil to appear in his forehead when he pulls out those bone-wings?

 

Because they can!

 

We have see it, Harry has the mark on his hand it's mentioned a few times but especially after he gets the coin back from Amanda's family and he has the mark on his forehead as well it's mentioned the first time he transforms. Read the damn fic!

On other matters that section of the story was great, nothing like a good battle to get rid of the foul taste left by all the soppy crap. Just make sure somebody dies, there have been a few to many fights where all the important people on both sides get away alive.

 

You forgot something from DR: Meciel was only able to teach Harry how to wield Hellfire and cast magic because he already had some ability in DF-style magic. Most of these Denarian hosts were pure muggle. They may be able to chuck around Hellfire, but that's useless against fellow Fallen, so they have to use their Demonic forms to have any chance of killing Harry.

 

Really? I had forgotten that.

I wonder if a person having skill in either DF-style magic or wand magic would give them a small ability in the other. I suppose that there is no real proof either way.

 

If memory serves, they're distinct talents. Harry's decent at summoning and pathetic at evocation, but he's obviously a powerful wand-wizard.

 

Ok so it was probably mentioned once or twice in some DR chapter a year ago then. I wonder why Shezza has never mentioned it after that though. I mean Harry does not cover his hands so I wonder why no one has ever mentioned the strange symbol on his hand. Might also be fun seeing the reaction of someone else to the symbol when Harry pulls out the bonewings.

Actually, Meciel did have some knowledge in wand-magic too, if not as much as she did in DF-magic. Hellfire can enchance both of them so being able to use DF-magic is probably not a requirement.

The thing is though, my original problem with this was that I cannot see why the Denarians would accept a muggle host. I mean there are obviously plenty of wizard candidates who would jump at the chance to get a coin so why settle for someone that cannot use magic. I realised later however that since Shezza says these fallen are insane they might not have the wits to realise something like that. The one who was controlling them and who was not insane did infact attack Harry magically/psionically.

Then there is also the fact that Shezza implied in DK:8 that picking up one of the coins would give a person magical abilities. Also I just remembered that in DF, the fallen could use magic even in their nonhuman forms. In Death Masks, Ursiel summons somekind of magical shield that protects it against Dresdens magical attack even as a beast.

It was implied by the Gatekeeper in Harrys trial that people who could use one style could also use the other slightly. It's just that without Meciel enchancing his powers, Harry could do only the simplest and most basic things with DF-magic. Just like the Gatekeeper said that he could not come close to being able to use wand-magic at the level Harry does, but he could do a little.

 

Ah yes I remember that now, thanks.

 

A while ago Dumbledore explained to Harry that he had taken measures to ensure that fudge, and by extension Umbridge wouldn't move against Harry until after he had taken his owls.

You forgot the part where they snap their wands mate

I mentioned this in my last post, if this happened Harry would be obliged to protect the students (he promised Dumbledore), it would prove the ministry's incompetence and would make a whole school full of children see Harry as a hero which would be very VERY funny.

Ah oops? Sorry guys I missed the 3rd page so this is a little behind the current topic it fits in right at the end of the 2nd page. I feel like a right idiot seeing as I have already posted once on the 3rd page.